2021-22 Eurofoot: You've all shited your last poo

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Ray Parlour > 2021-22 Eurofoot: You've all shited your last poo

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shut up blegum: Dec 17, 2008; --->Plastic Lawn<---

Healbot posted:

Barca is not going to win in Munich lmao they looked absolutely clue- and helpless at home.

But but... Xavi?

# ? Dec 8, 2021 15:09

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# ? May 4, 2024 02:18

EC10: Jan 17, 2005; We like Nin-po-po
We like Nin-po-po
We like Nin-po-po
We like NIN---PO!

barcelona having to play (badly) in europa league would be extremely my poo poo

# ? Dec 8, 2021 16:26

sebzilla: Mar 17, 2009; Kid's blasting everything in sight with that new-fangled musket.

https://twitter.com/ManUtd/status/1468652882174136320?t=rakpMhTtz0ltjRpUGq6GSA&s=19

Spicy.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 20:31

FullLeatherJacket: Dec 30, 2004; Chiunque pu� essere Luther Blissett, semplicemente adottando il nome Luther Blissett

charlie savage looks like a surprisingly normal human all considered

# ? Dec 8, 2021 20:39

Moktaro: Aug 3, 2007; I value call my nuts.

sebzilla posted:

https://twitter.com/ManUtd/status/1468652882174136320?t=rakpMhTtz0ltjRpUGq6GSA&s=19

Spicy.

Gonna be hard to tell which team is Young Boys in this one!

# ? Dec 8, 2021 20:40

jeebus bob: Nov 4, 2004; Festina lente

Bape Culture posted:

Which games actually need results tonight

The possible permutations in group G are virtually endless

All four can progress in either first or second place, all but one can be eliminated, and confusingly only three can end up in the Europa league

https://mobile.twitter.com/UEFACalculator/status/1468323044829630468

# ? Dec 8, 2021 21:06

Total Meatlove: Jan 28, 2007; Rangers died, shoujo Hitler cried ;_;

Barca are set up like a league two team playing in the FA Cup it�s hilarious

# ? Dec 8, 2021 21:22

Moktaro: Aug 3, 2007; I value call my nuts.

Benfica again! Hahaha get hosed Barca.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 21:25

EC10: Jan 17, 2005; We like Nin-po-po
We like Nin-po-po
We like Nin-po-po
We like NIN---PO!

Total Meatlove posted:

Barca are set up like a league two team playing in the FA Cup it�s hilarious

*xavi voice* its barca DNA

# ? Dec 8, 2021 21:29

sebzilla: Mar 17, 2009; Kid's blasting everything in sight with that new-fangled musket.

United game is fun so far. Henderson doing a decent impression of Neuer, youth/fringe players trying to make a good impression going forward, Bailly-Matic centreback pairing seconds away from hilarious implosion at all times.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 21:35

Moktaro: Aug 3, 2007; I value call my nuts.

Moktaro posted:

Hahaha get hosed Barca.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 21:36

Mechafunkzilla: Sep 11, 2006; If you want a vision of the future...

It is truly a joy to watch Barca fail in real time

# ? Dec 8, 2021 21:39

EC10: Jan 17, 2005; We like Nin-po-po
We like Nin-po-po
We like Nin-po-po
We like NIN---PO!

how has pique not been retired yet? universally hated by barca fans for his performances the past couple seasons, old, washed up, past it, doesnt care or play like he cares, busy outside of football

lewandowski making him look silly there was great great stuff

# ? Dec 8, 2021 21:39

Mechafunkzilla: Sep 11, 2006; If you want a vision of the future...

Lol Barca

# ? Dec 8, 2021 21:43

Omnikin: May 29, 2007; Press 'E' for Medic

Oyyy vey Sane

# ? Dec 8, 2021 21:44

Moktaro: Aug 3, 2007; I value call my nuts.

EC10 posted:

how has pique not been retired yet? universally hated by barca fans for his performances the past couple seasons, old, washed up, past it, doesnt care or play like he cares, busy outside of football

lewandowski making him look silly there was great great stuff

Can't buy anyone to replace him and apparently their vaunted academy doesn't have anyone who can claim his spot?

# ? Dec 8, 2021 21:46

Redczar: Nov 9, 2011

It�s appropriate that Barca�s kit looks like something Ronald McDonald would wear

# ? Dec 8, 2021 21:46

Total Meatlove: Jan 28, 2007; Rangers died, shoujo Hitler cried ;_;

The goal music is just *chefs kiss*

# ? Dec 8, 2021 21:46

Moktaro: Aug 3, 2007; I value call my nuts.

I'm enjoying this Golazo show, shame about the empty stadium matches but what can you do.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 21:48

EC10: Jan 17, 2005; We like Nin-po-po
We like Nin-po-po
We like Nin-po-po
We like NIN---PO!

Moktaro posted:

Can't buy anyone to replace him and apparently their vaunted academy doesn't have anyone who can claim his spot?

no way they dont have some academy grad or some la liga CB they can poach for cheap? but yeah i did read that pique was getting paid peanuts for this season

# ? Dec 8, 2021 21:49

Moktaro: Aug 3, 2007; I value call my nuts.

EC10 posted:

no way they dont have some academy grad or some la liga CB they can poach for cheap? but yeah i did read that pique was getting paid peanuts for this season

It would be hilarious if the other clubs decided not to sell to Barca out of fear the checks wouldn't clear. :laugh:

# ? Dec 8, 2021 22:08

Healbot: Jul 7, 2006; very very very fucjable
very vywr very

EC10 posted:

no way they dont have some academy grad or some la liga CB they can poach for cheap? but yeah i did read that pique was getting paid peanuts for this season

Barca are beyond broke. Quite literally 'sign past it players for the league minimum wage' broke.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 22:19

Mechafunkzilla: Sep 11, 2006; If you want a vision of the future...

Fart-celona

# ? Dec 8, 2021 22:23

Parity warning: Nov 1, 2009; 3rd Place, TRP Sack Race 2021/22

menos que un club

# ? Dec 8, 2021 22:23

Pand: Apr 1, 2011; Jogi Maldito

Moktaro posted:

Hahaha get hosed Barca.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 22:24

Bape Culture: Sep 13, 2006

We all love to lol at farcelona

# ? Dec 8, 2021 22:25

FullLeatherJacket: Dec 30, 2004; Chiunque pu� essere Luther Blissett, semplicemente adottando il nome Luther Blissett

a cool kit

for a clown club to wear

to the europa league

# ? Dec 8, 2021 22:37

TheRat: Aug 30, 2006

https://twitter.com/btsportfootball/status/1468700242094792705

# ? Dec 8, 2021 22:55

EC10: Jan 17, 2005; We like Nin-po-po
We like Nin-po-po
We like Nin-po-po
We like NIN---PO!

Healbot posted:

Barca are beyond broke. Quite literally 'sign past it players for the league minimum wage' broke.

cool and good

# ? Dec 8, 2021 23:03

pik_d: Feb 24, 2006; follow the white dove

TRP Post of the Month October 2021

Healbot posted:

Barca are beyond broke. Quite literally 'sign past it players for the league minimum wage' broke.

Just lmao that they want Raheem Sterling and Bernardo Silva with the balance they have.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 23:06

TheRat: Aug 30, 2006

https://twitter.com/tjuanmarti/status/1468705682149064705

Ouch, that's gotta sting

# ? Dec 8, 2021 23:22

Total Meatlove: Jan 28, 2007; Rangers died, shoujo Hitler cried ;_;

The draw on the 13th December features 16 teams: the eight runners-up from the UEFA Europa League group stage will be seeded; the eight third-placed teams from the UEFA Champions League group stage will be unseeded. Seeded plays away on the 17th February and at home on the 25th February.

Unseeded

Barcelona (ESP)
Atalanta (ITA) or Villarreal (ESP)
Sevilla (ESP)
Dortmund (GER)
Leipzig (GER)
Porto (POR)
Sheriff (MDA)
Zenit (RUS)

Seeded

Rangers (SCO)
Real Betis (ESP)

And the potentials - because of the way the tiebreakers work (see :lol:

Spurs below), there's some teams who can be caught on points but not on H2H results.

PSV Eindhoven (NED) or Real Sociedad (ESP)
Leicester (ENG) or Spartak (RUS) or Napoli (ITA) or Legia (POL)
Eintracht Frankfurt (GER) or Olympiakos (GRE)
Galatasaray (TUR) or Lazio (ITA)
Red Star (SER) or Braga (POR) or Midtjylland (DEN)
Dinamo Zagreb (CRO) or Genk (BEL)

Monaco are already through in Group B, so it's a straight shootout for second between Sociedad and PSV.
Leicester can go through to the Last 16 or end up in the Conference League dependent on results.
Frankfurt play Fenerbache and Olympiakos play Antwerp - every side here is playing for European football after Christmas, could see the group staying the same tbh.
Lazio play Galatasaray in a head to head tomorrow for 1st and 2nd place, so that'll be fireworks.
Red Star Belgrade and Braga are doing the same.
West Ham are already qualified in first and can't be caught in their group, and are playing Zagreb, so it's all dependent on whether Moyes rests players, but that group could be a bit of a damp squib.

Conference League Playoffs
Then it's the same again for the Europa dropping to the Conference, but with more comedy because Celtic are involved.
Maccabi Tel Aviv are already guaranteed second place in their group.
Roma have to better Bodo/Glimt's performance - goal difference doesn't come down to it, or they're in second. B/G are playing the side in 4th as well.
Jablonec have to do the same with Randers.
Union Berlin and Slavia Prague is a straight shootout for 2nd place.
PAOK are almost guaranteed second in theirs, playing Lincoln Red Imps and only needing a win.
Tottenham can squeak the playoffs if they match Vitesse's result. There's a chance that it could come down to comedy tiebreakers and Spurs could go out of Europe before Christmas because of a Ryan Sessegnon red card. The tiebreaker list is here;
- Points in head-to-head matches among the tied teams;
- Goal difference in head-to-head matches among the tied teams;
- Goals scored in head-to-head matches among the tied teams;
- If more than two teams were tied, and after applying all head-to-head criteria above, a subset of teams are still tied, all head-to-head criteria above are reapplied exclusively to this subset of teams;
- Goal difference in all group matches;
- Goals scored in all group matches;
- Away goals scored in all group matches;
- Wins in all group matches;
- Away wins in all group matches;
- Disciplinary points (direct red card = 3 points; double yellow card = 3 points; single yellow card = 1 point);
- UEFA club coefficient.
Qarabag and Basel are in a shootout for first and second.

There's potentially 3 Spanish teamsin the unseeded half of the draw, increasing the chances of Dortmund, Leipzig and Porto playing against a stronger side. Everyone is going to be praying for Sherif or Barcelona in the draw otherwise.

Spurs will likely go into their game with Rennes knowing the exact scoreline that'll see them through or out. A win may not be enough on it's own.

At some point tomorrow, a mixture of despondent and/or jubilant Roma, Lazio and Galatasaray fans are all going to be in Rome at the same time.

# ? Dec 9, 2021 00:20

FullLeatherJacket: Dec 30, 2004; Chiunque pu� essere Luther Blissett, semplicemente adottando il nome Luther Blissett

otoh spurs have just called off their game and will probably forfeit because rennes are saying neither they nor UEFA agreed to it

how spursy

# ? Dec 9, 2021 00:32

Total Meatlove: Jan 28, 2007; Rangers died, shoujo Hitler cried ;_;

Lasagnagating their way out of Europe is, at least, innovative.

# ? Dec 9, 2021 00:41

Gigi Galli: Sep 19, 2003; and then the car turned in to fire

Bape Culture posted:

We all love to lol at farcelona

# ? Dec 9, 2021 00:59

Literally Lewis Hamilton: Feb 22, 2005

Apparently Barca also borrowed money with the expectation they�d make at least the quarter finals

# ? Dec 9, 2021 02:33

Total Meatlove: Jan 28, 2007; Rangers died, shoujo Hitler cried ;_;

The actual squad firesale will be funny because :lol:

Coutinho for �4.99 but the academy is gonna get picked to shreds right?

# ? Dec 9, 2021 02:58

trem_two: Oct 22, 2002; it is better if you keep saying I'm fat, as I will continue to score goals; Fun Shoe

Literally Lewis Hamilton posted:

Apparently Barca also borrowed money with the expectation they�d make at least the quarter finals

Mes que un sporting failure

# ? Dec 9, 2021 02:58

Doctor Teeth: Sep 12, 2008

i wouldn't have picked salzburg as the ~~red bull~~ RasenBallsport club to make it out of the group stage at the start of the season

# ? Dec 9, 2021 03:26

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# ? May 4, 2024 02:18

Eau de MacGowan: May 12, 2009; BRASIL HEXA
2026 tá logo aí

serves xavi right for showing up in jeans and a puffer jacket like he was popping out for a kebab

# ? Dec 9, 2021 05:07

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Ray Parlour > 2021-22 Eurofoot: You've all shited your last poo

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