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Proving once again that trying is for suckers.
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Dec 27, 2021 21:29
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| # ? May 7, 2024 01:30 |
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Yeah, so, for for-fake-reals fantasy football, the playoffs occur during the last weeks of the real regular season. (Generally they finish the week before the last week of the real season since many teams which have clenched real playoff berths bench their starters). I have our league playing into the final week of the real regular season because why not eh. Basically fantasy playoffs would crash and burn if they carried over into the real playoffs since only about half the real-world teams and players make the playoffs. https://giant.gfycat.com/ThoseAcrobaticCapybara.webm |
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Dec 27, 2021 21:55
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That’s why a crazy person has been dumping good players on bad teams and picking up any players on teams that clenched a playoff spot while trying to time moves so as to keep winning current games. So basically making a fool of myself.
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Dec 27, 2021 22:04
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Lock posted:Yah, absolutely, and really as long as it doesn’t give you a blatant advantage (all teams coached by someone named nes* get treble points) you don’t have to have their agreement. Asside from thinking of like how RallyX has like a required Joker lap(which somehow would be a crazy thing to figure out how to convert). Maybe one game per season you are allowed(and required to use once per season) to declare before the week that you want to use your thing and then your final score is reversed. It'd be a bit chaotic because someone could get like 179 and their score just be flipped and be crazy high, but equally it could really bone them. With all the craziness of this season, including but not limited to Feuding and the HUNTRON, it would be another kinda fun mixup that could default to the last game if people didn't wanna pick when to use it. But I guess I worked out a sort of way to use the Joker lap. I did have an interesting idea. The lowest scoring player with double digit points has the digits swapped. It's not really possible to know how it would go. someone with 21 could get 12, but a player with 19 gets 91. This as a single game rule could really throw scores out of wack and maybe be an upset in a close game. Yes, both my idea for a future season rule and my idea for a per game thing both are rooted in absolute fuckery that could backfire. https://i.imgur.com/1qBoiAi.mp4
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Dec 28, 2021 03:53
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nesamdoom posted:I did have an interesting idea. The lowest scoring player with double digit points has the digits swapped. It's not really possible to know how it would go. someone with 21 could get 12, but a player with 19 gets 91. This as a single game rule could really throw scores out of wack and maybe be an upset in a close game. Dogballs, what do you think about this? I'd prefer this to be agreed before the match, I don't care either way, but I don't wanna seem like I thought of something to help myself. |
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Dec 29, 2021 07:10
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*standing on the street corner holding my hat out* Quarterbacks? Anyone have a stray quarterback they’re not using? Every bit helps. Bless you. It seems both my quarterbacks coordinated with each other to break their thumb/get benched on the same week. I’ve hated garoppolo all season so it’s no huge surprise that he broke his thumb just so he can sit on the bench but I had high hopes for Johnson. I think garoppolo might have gotten to him.
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Dec 29, 2021 22:12
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FluffieDuckie posted:*standing on the street corner holding my hat out* I still have Rodgers, won't play him because he's an antivaxxer but I guess I could help ya out, he's projected 102 this week... But, you have to treat him like poo poo and call him a oval office all the time and put a bit of crushed glass in his talcum powder. Shoot a trade offer of anything to TeaMates and I'll give ya him. I'd say I'd trade for a Torta Cubana but I don't think any play in the NFL. nesamdoom fucked around with this message at 00:58 on Dec 30, 2021 https://i.imgur.com/1qBoiAi.mp4
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Dec 30, 2021 00:54
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Wow a real quarterback AND I get to abuse him? This is fantastic. You’re my hero. I will now spend an hour trying to figure out how to trade.
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Dec 30, 2021 01:28
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Ok I offered you Jacobs. He’s usually good for 30 points. Also the summary on Rogers said last week his broken toe got stepped on AND kicked so I think someone else shares your torture strategy
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Dec 30, 2021 01:37
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Thank you so much for your support
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Dec 30, 2021 01:38
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FluffieDuckie posted:Ok I offered you Jacobs. He’s usually good for 30 points. Just accepted, and also amazingly happy to hear he hass been punished irl while on my fantasy bench. I hope he helps your pretend team achive actual glory. But, I'm sorry to inform you, I will retain control of his loved ones so that in the event of under performance I can continue to punish them... won't matter to you tho, and hopefully he didn't drink the whisky I sent with him as a gift. E:I nesamdoom fucked around with this message at 01:52 on Dec 30, 2021 https://i.imgur.com/1qBoiAi.mp4
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Dec 30, 2021 01:48
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FluffieDuckie posted:That’s why a crazy person has been dumping good players on bad teams and picking up any players on teams that clenched a playoff spot while trying to time moves so as to keep winning current games. This would have been brilliant and makes me wish I physically COULD continue the league into the real playoffs but alas, it cuts off before then. nesamdoom posted:[...Y]our final score is reversed. It'd be a bit chaotic because someone could get like 179 and their score just be flipped and be crazy high, but equally it could really bone them. This is a brilliant idea for a rule change, and I'm gonna ask you to hang on to it for next year, as it'll work perfectly with what I have in mind. Though I like your second idea even better: quote:I did have an interesting idea. The lowest scoring player with double digit points has the digits swapped. It's not really possible to know how it would go. someone with 21 could get 12, but a player with 19 gets 91. This as a single game rule could really throw scores out of wack and maybe be an upset in a close game. I love it. It will be done. quote:Yes, both my idea for a future season rule and my idea for a per game thing both are rooted in absolute fuckery that could backfire. Those are the best kinds of rules. https://giant.gfycat.com/ThoseAcrobaticCapybara.webm |
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Dec 30, 2021 11:24
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SCORE UPDATES In the CONSOLIDATED, Result overturned! Due to the 1/3B rule, the Fighting Capys have upended the TeaMates! THE FEUD: The Fartbirds busted! The Chestnuts win! In the WINNERS, CAN NOBODY STOP THE HUNTRON Once again, thanks to the awe-inspiring might of the HUNTRON, WAIRARAPA BUSH advances over the confused golfers, who seem even more confused after the events of the past week. TESTING: **In THE COMMISH'S OFFICE. THE COMMISH sits, brooding; stewing. THE COMMISH'S PHONE rings. THE COMMISH lifts it to answer.** "Sir, we have the results of the TESTING for this week. I had to t--" **THE COMMISH slams down THE RECEIVER. THE COMMISH has no more time for FAILURES.** https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_76RK_5bBs "Sir, we have the results of the TESTING for this week. I had to tell you the results were (6,5)." TESTING RESULTS: ALL COOL. THE COMMISH IS DREAMING. ------ FEUDING THIS WEEK: Chestnuts vs. Fighting Capys Fartbirds vs. Nonchalants https://giant.gfycat.com/ThoseAcrobaticCapybara.webm |
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Dec 30, 2021 12:04
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 ATTENTION: CONSOLATED. CALVINBALL HAS BEEN ACTIVATED.What is Calvinball? For the limited purposes of the CONSOLATED playoffs, it is simply the introduction of player-chosen new rules. These rules can last just for the week, or continue on if the players so desire. Apologies to the Calvinball league that was (and I assume still is?) running in The Armchair Quarterback, from where I stole the idea. This week, a new rule has been announced! The lowest scoring player with double digit points has the digits swapped. That is, someone with 21 could get 12, but a player with 19 gets 91. This applies to all teams. Please note any Calvinball rule changes apply ONLY to the CONSOLATED brackets. Thank you, and good luck! Lock fucked around with this message at 20:09 on Dec 30, 2021 https://giant.gfycat.com/ThoseAcrobaticCapybara.webm |
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Dec 30, 2021 12:11
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In the spirit of transparency I was able to pick up a couple of quarterbacks because they were second string players called up to play because their starters got Covid or otherwise incapacitated themselves. So if you want Rogers back so you can finish torturing him I’d be happy to toss him over the fence (after stomping on his bad toe one last time)
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Dec 31, 2021 22:29
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FluffieDuckie posted:In the spirit of transparency I was able to pick up a couple of quarterbacks because they were second string players called up to play because their starters got Covid or otherwise incapacitated themselves. I won't play him. honestly he failed me everytime I needed him anyways. I'm just gonna finish the season/playoffs out trying to come up with weird stuff and napping. Don't unfluff yourself over it. https://i.imgur.com/1qBoiAi.mp4
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Dec 31, 2021 23:38
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Lock posted:FEUDING THIS WEEK: oh god oh god time to do something I don't know what to do aaaaaa  or . . .  maybe not???
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Dec 31, 2021 23:59
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nesamdoom posted:I won't play him. honestly he failed me everytime I needed him anyways. I'm just gonna finish the season/playoffs out trying to come up with weird stuff and napping. Don't unfluff yourself over it. Will do. He’s in good abusive hands. Don’t worry.
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Jan 1, 2022 00:11
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welp i'm up against huntron so i'm out this round, been fun anyways! anyone need a quarterback? |
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Jan 1, 2022 01:02
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Stoner Sloth posted:welp i'm up against huntron so i'm out this round, been fun anyways! I love the huntron. give in to the huntron. the huntron will make you happy. the huntron is all we need. https://i.imgur.com/1qBoiAi.mp4
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Jan 1, 2022 18:41
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Don't know if we are counting kicker, but either 11 becomes 11 or my kicker goes from 10 to 01. Either way I think it worked out. |
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Jan 3, 2022 15:34
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nesamdoom posted:I love the huntron. give in to the huntron. the huntron will make you happy. the huntron is all we need. that may be the case but also it's actually looking way closer than i anticipated based on the level my team was playing at... might even be in with a chance here! |
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Jan 3, 2022 15:43
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Good luck. At least one dude has disappointed me most games. I'm gonna |
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Jan 3, 2022 15:48
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nesamdoom posted:I love the huntron. give in to the huntron. the huntron will make you happy. the huntron is all we need. There is no huntron; there is only Zuul |
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Jan 3, 2022 16:44
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xcheopis posted:There is no huntron; there is only Zuul But a small facsimile of The Great Huntron, Lord of Balls and Feet Whether or Not They Truly Meet. https://i.imgur.com/1qBoiAi.mp4
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Jan 3, 2022 19:22
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Happy new year everyone, I am glad you like the Huntron so much
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Jan 4, 2022 08:41
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Jaguars! posted:Happy new year everyone, I am glad you like the Huntron so much the second image really got me for a second thinking about Tecmo Super Bowl which was/is my favourite (Murica)football game ever. https://i.imgur.com/1qBoiAi.mp4
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Jan 4, 2022 10:45
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Full update later, but here's what you need to know heading into Championship Weekend. THE HUNTRON IS DEAD It looks like our luckiest potheads, the Sloths, overcame the power of the HUNTRON and Wairarapa by literally flinging untold numbers of corpses of QBs at it. Despite some issues with the testing results in the previous week, there remains a lack of proof and the silence from THE OFFICE OF THE COMMISH is deafening. DUCK SEASON CONTINUES DESITE COACH'S STRATEGY BACKFIRING Somehow, despite cutting numerous players from their team in an effort to save money heading into games that weren't even on the schedule, the Ducks have outlasted the Squirrels in a battle between the two cutest mascots. SUPERBYOWL I: STONER'S SLOTHS vs MIGHTY DUCKS-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- edit for rest of league's news **NOTE: So when doing the CALVINBALL rule last week, I didn't take into consideration the fact that our scoring uses decimals. For the sake of my sanity, I have made a judgment call that the rule ignores anything after the decimal. So, for example, a team that has a lowest scorer getting 19.3 points has the score changed to 91.3 The OrbSons gain 27 points due to CALVINBALL, while the TeaMates lose 37.8 points to 1/3B as well as 9 points to CALVINBALL (10 -> 1, oof). OrbSons win! Fartbirds BUSTED in FEUD with Nonchalants. Nonchalants WIN! Both Thunder Bong's and Mars Attacks' CALVINBALL adjustments actually zeroed out their 1/3B penalty. Neat. Well, ignoring decimals anyway. Chestnuts had only one player score double digits. Their team total jumped from 17 to 26 thanks to the rule. Multiple teams lost 9 points thanks to CALVINBALL and a kicker getting exactly 10 points. One team, the Phoenix, had a WR get exactly 10. Two teams, the moon takers and the Scores, had a player score 11 points. FEUDING THIS WEEK I'unno, it's the last week, y'all tell me if you wanna FEUD. Or maybe SPIN THE BIG WHEEL and try to get as close to 100 as you can? Up to you, but lemme know by Saturday! (Nobody cares abouut the Thursday game amirite) Lock fucked around with this message at 16:32 on Jan 6, 2022 https://giant.gfycat.com/ThoseAcrobaticCapybara.webm |
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Jan 6, 2022 15:59
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Also: OP updated. Any of the CONSOLATED coaches with a CALVINBALL rule idea? https://giant.gfycat.com/ThoseAcrobaticCapybara.webm |
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Jan 6, 2022 16:30
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So what you’re saying is I’m going to get clobbered this week but at least I’m cute.
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Jan 6, 2022 22:26
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Lock posted:
Ah, it seems the lads have been putting in some effort. How dare they!?! Outrageous! |
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Jan 6, 2022 23:02
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I like the sound of this wheel. sign me up.
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Jan 6, 2022 23:13
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FluffieDuckie posted:So what you’re saying is I’m going to get clobbered this week but at least I’m cute. Probably! (whispers)quickcheckthewaiverwire But it was an amazing run! Though I gotta admit, I love squirrels and I miss how ubiquitous they were where I grew up as opposed to this kami-forsaken land. Ducks...I mean, I like 'em and all, but squirrels, man, squirrels! xcheopis posted:Ah, it seems the lads have been putting in some effort. How dare they!?! Outrageous! Jerks, the lot of them, but that just reflects positively on your coaching! rear end-penny posted:I like the sound of this wheel. sign me up. ALERT!THUNDER BONG has requested to SPIN THE WHEEL! Similar to the FEUD, if a team chooses to SPIN THE BIG WHEEL then both teams are attempting to come as close to 100 points, without going over, as possible. Seeing as how that team is up against, er, Lock Picks which is ME, then I accept! In the matchup between THUNDER BONG and Lock Picks, the winner is the team which comes closest to 100 points without going over! Lock fucked around with this message at 16:43 on Jan 7, 2022 https://giant.gfycat.com/ThoseAcrobaticCapybara.webm |
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Jan 7, 2022 16:25
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Lock posted:Probably! (whispers)quickcheckthewaiverwire So far ahead of you I can hardly see you in my rear view mirror (of my pickup truck full of new blood)
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Jan 7, 2022 19:16
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Lock posted:Probably! (whispers)quickcheckthewaiverwire But it was an amazing run! Though I gotta admit, I love squirrels and I miss how ubiquitous they were where I grew up as opposed to this kami-forsaken land. Ducks...I mean, I like 'em and all, but squirrels, man, squirrels! oh yeah I'm going to gently caress that up.
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Jan 7, 2022 21:14
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if it makes you feel better I totally shut down this week and hosed it up too. We both busted  My other leagues finished last week (won promotion in the Tier League, woop) and I kinda forgot this was happening until about halfway through the Sunday games. https://giant.gfycat.com/ThoseAcrobaticCapybara.webm |
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Jan 10, 2022 00:39
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Did footballing stop? |
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Jan 21, 2022 18:41
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i really wanna see the results of the last game, am hoping that a double is finally rolled for maximum lols |
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Jan 21, 2022 22:00
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Stoner Sloth posted:i really wanna see the results of the last game, am hoping that a double is finally rolled for maximum lols i'm hoping the commish never proves that the smoke, obviously rolling out your locker room, has anything to do with your team. Such a mystery that everywhere the Sloths go has such a dank cloud left behind. https://i.imgur.com/1qBoiAi.mp4
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Jan 22, 2022 00:37
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| # ? May 7, 2024 01:30 |
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nesamdoom posted:i'm hoping the commish never proves that the smoke, obviously rolling out your locker room, has anything to do with your team. Such a mystery that everywhere the Sloths go has such a dank cloud left behind. lmao that would be a good ending too |
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Jan 22, 2022 04:02
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