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i think i can do this, in it to sin it* *the storys badness will be my sin
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Sep 9, 2021 14:34
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| # ¿ May 10, 2024 08:47 |
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SRQ posted:I appear to have missed this, or did I? Am I reading the dates wrong? its sort of confusing but i think its oct 7
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Sep 21, 2021 23:41
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prompt= 'bluff' Black Sunflower 997 words (lol i had zero time to cut down, did the best i could) A worm strings my guts. It threads through them like needle-stitch, drawing what little I send my body from my body. I am skin and bone, my arms like spindles and my thighs creased. I once had a mouth but Gerar sew it shut. He will sew every gap shut, in time. The seams then will be like my wrinkles, webbed across my face, my body, but I am not old enough yet for him to wall me off. “Eris,” he says, “the weak eat the food of the body and the strong eat the food of the spirit.” When he says this his eyes glint like cut diamond but there’s an ache behind them as if could he starve for me he would. Where the garden has become the desert there is nothing left of it. Nothing but the leaves I have pressed into my pages since I was a child. When I was a child I drank the sap of the trees. The trees were legion, the grass electric. The leaves parsed the sunlight like spears of honey. Now we live in a small hut of clay, the earth blistered and peeling. But Gerar says he has built our home strong, the way the insect encased in amber bears with its shell the weight of time. One morning I woke up, and the worm was in me, and my mouth was sewn shut. Gerar says there’s nothing more for me to say. Every word, he says, messed up something he was doing. And, he says, the worm in your belly will eat what’s wrong with you and leave the rest. I knew then that his nerves were screaming. Gerar, God had said, it is yours to die like a dog when I decree it. Holding Gerar’s hand I had looked up at him, and the look in his eyes had said, perfectly good child sacrifice right here. But Gerar says that God doesn’t undo what has come to pass, for He’d never finish a genesis that way. If He let himself do that He would never stop getting started. I watch Gerar sleep and the lips of his mouth turn in moan. Spittle trickles down that sallow jaw, his thatch of hair parted by his beaked nose. I watch him and the morning’s glow burns against my back from where it spills in through the hut’s threshold. The morning’s glow burns and I creep out across the sand. In the sun whose light bleeds into the white waves in phosphorescence. Glittering streaks of mercury race along my sight lines. My shadow is translucent felt skeined and tattered over the sand. Defined more by the ridges and whorls than any substance itself. And I see, spiring from past the next dune, a single pillar, obsidian. Lancing the air and in the morning sun like a testament to an age that treads ever closer to us with the heart of a beast. For there will not always be light, like there is now. And yea though the light has bleached away my joy, still I fear I will miss it when they take it away. I unsling my pack, draw with trembling fingers my book of pressed leaves. I have not left the hut since the shadows fleeted away like ghosts to stand or die as God commands. Yet my sight is steady, my head held high, as I appraise it, arched back the way no crone can, the way Gerar’s back would throw out. I see that pillar clear to the sky. I hear grunting behind me. Gerar is forcing himself over the sand. He braces himself with a stave and his body heaves with each movement like he’s about to collapse. “You’re supposed to eat yourself,” he says in a hiss. “That’s the message.” But of course I am tired of trying to say what I can't. I don’t even incline my head towards him. I continue to stare up at the black pillar as it climbs the blood-red sky. “You think that has something to do with Him?” Gerar says. Cackles. “You think He’d make a tower of all things? I know how he thinks about you and me.” He coughs. Spit mists the air and drizzles onto the white sands like droplets of ink. “No, the dead earth shaped a tower in defiance of Him. The way I wish I could.” I am seeing the sky fringed in red like the pit of fire has opened in the sky. Seeing red the eyes of Gerar they are blood-shot, haggard. Were I to open my book of leaves it wouldn’t be that way. Because I have kept the patterns. Etched through strength of spine into memories. Elegies. Gifts from presence long gone that would rather not be nothing right now. All I have to do is thumb the pages and I can lose myself from life for the instant it would take not to make a mistake. But he is saying now there will be more of us, a drat sight more, before the myths are through. The memetics. Maybe you feel hopeless right now, knowing that’ll all be on you, and the dead earth hates you too. I mean when there’s not enough to go around, I mean He is one thing and there are two of us. I didn’t ask to be born but thank God it surely must be over. And so I leave him by the sand, on the sand, he will forever and always be on the sand or in it. I carry the book of pressed leaves with me and am called many names. They say Eris, you are skin and bones, but you are a lovely thing. Poor dear can’t help being so silent. They say social skills never come to some. Those eyes hungry for wonder, you’d know them anywhere. Like I saw them in a movie, or read about them in a book.
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Oct 9, 2021 03:55
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ya the critting was good and i think i know what i would need to change
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Oct 9, 2021 22:17
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curlingiron posted:Okay, confession time: My story is a sequel. Specifically, it’s a sequel to a story I wrote for our own beloved show-runner Chili in a brawl wherein he asked us to write a story where someone is lost. Since I bounced off the first prompt entirely, and had already written something for the second, that was the only thing I could think to do. thats super chill. i did the same thing kind of, i did the same story style i used in my first every brawl win (against flerp) and it was kind of a homage to that tho i dont expect anyone to know. it has a similar name and themes. being super original in 2 hours was hard when my brain was fried from the school week from hell this was a v fun experience and im sorry if i didnt stress that.
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Oct 12, 2021 04:42
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