Facebook Instagram WhatsApp down, so what

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Facebook Instagram WhatsApp down, so what

deep dish peat moss: Jul 27, 2006

thunderspanks posted:

Is there precedent for something like that scenario occurring with a situation of this magnitude though? Like hey I'd jizz my pants if that played out, but I think you fail to see the scope of the mayhem that would ensue if it occurred. No way in hell would it be allowed to happen without a chorus of "too big to fail" rhetoric stopping it.

Nothing the scale of Facebook no, but they did it to AOL in 2010.

I worked at a large registrar when it happened and we got to handle all of their lost and confused customers :smith:

I was mistaken though the part I said about them letting the domains just disappear only applies to the country-branded domains like facebook.us or whatever, I just looked that up again

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:48

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# ? May 2, 2024 13:07

Three Olives: Apr 10, 2005

https://blog.cloudflare.com/october-2021-facebook-outage/

Cloudflare explains why it went down and that is fetid corpse is slowly coming back to life.

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:48

frumpykvetchbot: Feb 20, 2004; PROGRESSIVE SCAN; Upset Trowel

Hell Yeah posted:

the complete destruction of facebook 2would be the best thing that ever happened in my life.

it could potentially save mankind.

In my nascent headcanon some heroic grunt trusted with arcane sysadmin runes deep in the boiler room had a moment of clarity and conscience and coded and executed a brutally efficient self destruct script. Watching the frenzy silently from a hilltop near the datacenter, patiently waiting for the FBI with a cig and a smile.

FB is physically vast, containerships full of server gear. All that won't just evaporate. But suppose you could knock it offline for long enough - a few days perhaps - long enough to break the spell? What if people could start to think again?

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:48

GATOS Y VATOS: Aug 22, 2002

So I'm assuming NextDoor is blowing up rn

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:49

frumpykvetchbot: Feb 20, 2004; PROGRESSIVE SCAN; Upset Trowel

n/m

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:49

Mooey Cow: Jan 27, 2018; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS; Pillbug

If we can get it down one more time we will win by TKO, then legally Facebook is not allowed to get up again, come on guys let's do this!!!

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:49

Three Olives: Apr 10, 2005

I just tried, Facebook is resolving again. It's broken but you can access the server.

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:50

steinrokkan: Apr 2, 2011; Soiled Meat

deep dish peat moss posted:

Throughout all of this ICANN doesn't give a gently caress how big Facebook is because they pay them the exact same $4000/year that every other franchisee does, and they much prefer working with franchisees who don't put them through bullshit like this.\

I have a feeling that if ICANN tries to do anything against Facebook (or any other billionaire's property), the whole weight of the government and private sector, all the interested parties from Amazon to Google, will descend on them like a swarm of locust until there's nothing but bleached bones and whatever responsibilities it held are taken over by the same for profit corps it was trying to regulate.

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:50

gbs but from 2004: Oct 24, 2004; wow u rude pig

"i STarTed this TOIlEt Of A tHreaD aNd HAve sOmEHOW aVoidEd A red teXt"

WhatsApp is back down again, everyone get msn messenger quick!!!

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:50

Steadiman: Jan 31, 2006; Hey...what kind of party is this? there's no booze and only one hooker!

_{silly sevens}

GATOS Y VATOS posted:

So I'm assuming NextDoor is blowing up rn

Nextdoor is always blowing up

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:52

DickParasite: Dec 2, 2004; Slippery Tilde

The Grumbles posted:

I had zero new whtasapp messages

How's that different from any other day?

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:52

xiw: Sep 25, 2011; i wake up at night
night action madness nightmares
maybe i am scum
Cpig Haiku contest 2020 winner

deep dish peat moss posted:

There's a company called RegistrarSafe that is a 100% subsidiary of Facebook. Think of it like a franchise - they paid the $4000/year franchise fee to ICANN to be able to open their own location of the franchise. Instead of hamburgers, they sell domain names.

The franchise owners have a lot of rules that have to be followed to keep your franchise open. One of them is that you have to keep a database of the identities of all of your customers. Another is that said database is never allowed to be down or inaccessible for more than 864 consecutive minutes.

Currently that database is down for RegistrarSafe, because everything is down for everything owned by Facebook. If that outage exceeds the 864 minute mark, we (internet users) can all submit complaints to the franchise owners saying "Hey, this location's database has been down for <x> minutes and counting."

If the franchise owners get enough of these to be annoyed by them, they will permanently revoke the franchisee's rights to operate a franchise, forever, with essentially no hope of appeal.

They will also take all of the domain names ever sold by that franchise and basically just let them disappear and go away.

As soon as that happens Facebook is no longer the legal owner of facebook.com, instagram.com, etc. and a whole bunch of their legal protections for ownership of those domains disappears. If you bought facebook.com and started a website about a book that you're writing named "face", there would be absolutely zero legal pressure for you to give facebook.com to the company named Facebook, because your book is not in competition with their website.

Throughout all of this ICANN doesn't give a gently caress how big Facebook is because they pay them the exact same $4000/year that every other franchisee does, and they much prefer working with franchisees who don't put them through bullshit like this.\

e: here's the best part: on the registrar end there is absolutely no way at all to predict the exact time that the domains would disappear and become available to the public. Facebook would have no way of knowing the exact
moment the domains will become purchasable, and it would be first-come, first-served when they do.

I don't know how likely this all is, but it's possible and it would mostly come down to how lovely or good the business relationship between Facebook (DBA RegistrarSafe) and ICANN is.

realistically not possible (even if i want to believe)

icann would need to cancel the registrar contract under one of these grounds:

quote:

5.5.4 Registrar fails to cure any breach of this Agreement within twenty-one (21) days after ICANN gives Registrar notice of the breach.

5.5.5 Registrar fails to comply with a ruling granting specific performance under Sections 5.7 or 7.1.

5.5.6 Registrar has been in fundamental and material breach of its obligations under this Agreement at least three (3) times within a twelve (12) month period.

5.5.7 Registrar continues acting in a manner that ICANN has reasonably determined endangers the stability or operational integrity of the Internet after receiving three (3) days notice of that determination.

Also when a registrar is terminated that doesn't cancel its domains - they are transferred to another registrar and facebook would maintain ownership.

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:53

EnsGDT: Nov 9, 2004; ~boop boop beep motherfucker~

I came back because facebook is down but now that it's coming back up I guess I'll leave for another couple years again

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:54

Flayer: Sep 13, 2003; by Fluffdaddy; Buglord

I received a WhatsApp message, how exciting. It still see to be down tho so I'm not sure why one got through (other people have told me they have sent messages and nothing has come through from them).

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:54

steinrokkan: Apr 2, 2011; Soiled Meat

EnsGDT posted:

I came back because facebook is down but now that it's coming back up I guess I'll leave for another couple years again

hi, bye

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:55

Comfy Fleece Sweater: Apr 2, 2013; You see, but you do not observe.

gently caress Facebook

gently caress Zuck

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:55

The Grumbles: Jun 5, 2006

DickParasite posted:

How's that different from any other day?

you don't know me

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:55

EnsGDT: Nov 9, 2004; ~boop boop beep motherfucker~

steinrokkan posted:

hi, bye

<3 byeeee

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:55

Big Scary Owl: Oct 1, 2014; by Fluffdaddy

Don't let it get back up again people, kick it while it's down

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:56

386-SX 25Mhz VGA: Jan 14, 2003; (C) American Megatrends Inc.,

sausage king of Chicago posted:

https://twitter.com/Joyce_Karam/status/1445111562939817991?s=20

"Servers likely behind problem" lol

The problem is probably caused by computers

# ? Oct 4, 2021 22:57

kntfkr: Feb 11, 2019; GOOSE FUCKER

IT BURNS posted:

HURRY, I NEED SOMEONE TO VALIDATE MY COOKING SKILLS, FAMILY, CAREER CHOICES, RECENT VACATION, AND HATRED OF MULTI-CULTURALISM!

Keep up the work big Ned, you're doing super!

# ? Oct 4, 2021 23:09

IT BURNS: Nov 19, 2012

kntfkr posted:

Keep up the work big Ned, you're doing super!

Phew!

# ? Oct 4, 2021 23:19

HonorableTB: Dec 22, 2006

it's back up i just made a poast on fb

# ? Oct 4, 2021 23:19

Mooey Cow: Jan 27, 2018; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS; Pillbug

You're posting on the ghost of facebook. The real one died :rip:

# ? Oct 4, 2021 23:21

old beast lunatic: Nov 3, 2004; by Hand Knit

Well that was a nice few hours.

# ? Oct 4, 2021 23:22

crime fighting hog: Jun 29, 2006; I only pray, Heaven knows when to lift you out

And it's back down? HAHAHAHA

# ? Oct 4, 2021 23:23

phydeaux: Jul 29, 2003; Nose Army. Jigsaw. Smellsign.

phydeaux posted:

Since FB is how so much information gets shared, bets on them doing this on purpose to mitigate their stock free-fall. Let�s see if it�s magically back up shortly after the market closes.

Conspiracy quoting myself but yeah, here we are less than 2 hours after the market closes and it�s coming back�

I understand the DNS issue but it�s just such a nagging feeling that there was a conference call after the 60 minutes piece last night where FB execs and analysts were predicting percentage losses in the double digits for the stock this morning. Through a combination of crippling a good portion of social media communication and pulling a Trump by distracting people from a current disaster by means of manufacturing a new one they might by quite happy with the modest 5% loss today.

# ? Oct 4, 2021 23:23

HonorableTB: Dec 22, 2006

phydeaux posted:

Conspiracy quoting myself but yeah, here we are less than 2 hours after the market closes and its coming back

I understand the DNS issue but its just such a nagging feeling that there was a conference call after the 60 minutes piece last night where FB execs and analysts were predicting percentage losses in the double digits for the stock this morning. Through a combination of crippling a good portion of social media communication and pulling a Trump by distracting people from a current disaster by means of manufacturing a new one they might by quite happy with the modest 5% loss today.

conspiracyposting is signal boosting chuds and you shouldn't do that

# ? Oct 4, 2021 23:25

phydeaux: Jul 29, 2003; Nose Army. Jigsaw. Smellsign.

HonorableTB posted:

conspiracyposting is signal boosting chuds and you shouldn't do that

Sorry, maybe conspiracy is too strong. Let�s just say it would be no surprise if very rich people went to great lengths to protect their money.

# ? Oct 4, 2021 23:36

old beast lunatic: Nov 3, 2004; by Hand Knit

HonorableTB posted:

conspiracyposting is signal boosting chuds and you shouldn't do that

Nah, this particular conspiracy is just as plausible as incompetence or whatever, maybe more.

# ? Oct 4, 2021 23:38

Facebook Aunt: Oct 4, 2008; wiggle wiggle

Do I have to change my username or what? :ohdear:

# ? Oct 5, 2021 00:06

just another: Oct 16, 2009; these dead towns that make the maps wrong now

HonorableTB posted:

conspiracyposting is signal boosting chuds and you shouldn't do that

Yes sir President Bartlet sir.

# ? Oct 5, 2021 00:09

Powered Descent: Jul 13, 2008; We haven't had that spirit here since 1969.

Facebook Aunt posted:

Do I have to change my username or what?

I suggest "WhatsAunt"

# ? Oct 5, 2021 00:13

Chrs: Sep 21, 2015

https://youtu.be/DnPL1OoQl8c

# ? Oct 5, 2021 00:39

Clockwork Sputnik: Nov 6, 2004; 24 Hour Party Monster

Powered Descent posted:

I suggest "WhatsAunt"

InstagrAunt

Also, if you need me, I'll be on allo

# ? Oct 5, 2021 00:40

crazy eyes mustafa: Nov 30, 2014

Yeah man if it's down for 69420 consecutive minutes you can assume legal control over their domains and there's nothing they can do about it :hehe:

# ? Oct 5, 2021 01:04

Mr. Fall Down Terror: Jan 24, 2018; by Fluffdaddy

phydeaux posted:

Sorry, maybe conspiracy is too strong. Let�s just say it would be no surprise if very rich people went to great lengths to protect their money.

i know that when i want to quietly delete things, it helps to first put a massive, massive spotlight on my operations as i'm doing it. as we all know, rich people cannot do evil acts without first leaving bread crumb trails and clues all over for intrepid truth seekers to discover, it is part of the blood pact

# ? Oct 5, 2021 01:04

Poohs Packin: Jan 13, 2019

Remember the scene in Lawnmower Man where he fucks?

Some of the first titties I ever did see.

# ? Oct 5, 2021 01:44

Chinatown: Sep 11, 2001; by Fluffdaddy; Fun Shoe

facedook

# ? Oct 5, 2021 01:45

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# ? May 2, 2024 13:07

Driftingmouse: May 26, 2021; by Fritz the Horse

And Facebook is back up, but apparently Trump's Facebook page has been reinstated. No seriously.

https://www.patriots.win/p/13zg0FbztZ/facebook-is-back-look-who-else-i/

# ? Oct 5, 2021 01:54

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