NFL Week 14 News/Views: 2 out of 3 ain't bad.

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > NFL Week 14 News/Views: 2 out of 3 ain't bad.

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Cat Hassler: Feb 7, 2006; Slippery Tilde

Oh Daniel Jones looks like Eli Manning

# ? Dec 8, 2021 08:26

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# ? May 9, 2024 14:41

Asproigerosis: Mar 13, 2013; insufferable

You'd be able to smell the stench of failure coming off goff

# ? Dec 8, 2021 08:30

Cavauro: Jan 9, 2008

i can tell most ppl apart easily. almost all

# ? Dec 8, 2021 11:12

Chucktesla: Jul 13, 2014

Ryan tannehill looks like a cop

# ? Dec 8, 2021 11:39

FizFashizzle: Mar 30, 2005

Adams is dead again

https://twitter.com/rapsheet/status/1468553872448929796?s=21

# ? Dec 8, 2021 13:12

Quiet Feet: Dec 14, 2009; THE HELL IS WITH THIS ASS!?

Is it just me or are there more torn labrum this year?

# ? Dec 8, 2021 13:23

Impossibly Perfect Sphere: Nov 6, 2002; They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

Cat Hassler posted:

I played bar trivia tonight (finished 2nd out of 16 playing basically by myself thanks for asking) And it occurred to me if someone put a thing in front of me asking to identify the starting NFL QB by their head shot without jersey I’d fail miserably

Goff
Stafford
Cousins
Tannehill
Wentz
Mac Jones
Matt Ryan
Daniel Jones
Josh Allen

All just random looking white dudes

If you can't tell Matt Ryan from Daniel Jones you might have face blindness OP.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 13:26

FizFashizzle: Mar 30, 2005

Lmao

quote:

Duke beat reporter Steve Wiseman reports that former Giants OC and Cowboys head coach Jason Garrett is a candidate for the Blue Devils' vacant head coaching job.

Garrett was fired from his post as offensive coordinator of the Giants two weeks ago. Duke is in the hunt for a new head coach after parting ways with David Cutcliffe in late November. Clemson OC Tony Elliot and Texas A&M DC Mike Elko are reportedly two other candidates for the Blue Devils job. Garrett has never coached in college.

Imagine going from cutcliffe to Garrett.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 13:34

shyduck: Oct 3, 2003

https://twitter.com/ProFootballTalk/status/1468575718929956865?t=zMOpDHsYE8vYVgokry0dHg&s=19

:haw:

# ? Dec 8, 2021 14:39

Hizawk: Jun 18, 2004; High on the Lions.

What the gently caress

# ? Dec 8, 2021 15:13

The Wild Man of YOLO: Apr 20, 2004; A little cross-country, gentlemen?

Quiet Feet posted:

Is it just me or are there more torn labrum this year?

I believe the plural is "labia"

# ? Dec 8, 2021 15:30

Impossibly Perfect Sphere: Nov 6, 2002; They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

shyduck posted:

https://twitter.com/ProFootballTalk/status/1468575718929956865?t=zMOpDHsYE8vYVgokry0dHg&s=19

Give me another reaction video from his GF.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 15:32

K8.0: Feb 26, 2004; Her Majesty's 56th Regiment of Foot

shyduck posted:

https://twitter.com/ProFootballTalk/status/1468575718929956865?t=zMOpDHsYE8vYVgokry0dHg&s=19

So much for the NFC being the "strong" conference.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 15:37

Quiet Feet: Dec 14, 2009; THE HELL IS WITH THIS ASS!?

Aldon Smith arrested for DUI.

https://profootballtalk.nbcsports.com/2021/12/07/aldon-smith-is-arrested-for-dui-causing-injury-a-felony/

More like "All Done" Smith.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 15:46

DariusLikewise: Oct 4, 2008; You wore that on Halloween?

Greg Olsen is constantly a guy I see on TV and it takes me at least 45 seconds of staring directly at him and deep thought to figure out who he is every time

# ? Dec 8, 2021 15:55

C-Euro: Mar 20, 2010; Soiled Meat

shyduck posted:

https://twitter.com/ProFootballTalk/status/1468575718929956865?t=zMOpDHsYE8vYVgokry0dHg&s=19

Howling with laughter at this. But honestly I never would have expected him to have that game-winning drive in him, so sure, give him this.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 16:02

Chris James 2: Aug 9, 2012

Aldon Smith's legal issues section on his wiki page is, by far, his largest section there and isn't even updated to include today's issue yet

quote:

On January 28, 2012, Smith was arrested for driving under the influence in Miami Beach, Florida.[35][36]

On June 30, 2012, Smith was believed to have suffered stab wounds when attempting to break up a fight at a party at his Santa Clara county residence. Two other people were shot in the incident.[37] On October 9, 2013, Smith was charged with "three felony counts of illegal possession of an assault weapon" relating to the stabbing incident. The charges were later reduced to misdemeanors.[38]

On September 20, 2013, Smith was involved in a single-vehicle accident in San Jose, California. He was subsequently arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence and possession of marijuana. After the loss to the Indianapolis Colts in the third week of the football season, he voluntarily entered a rehabilitation facility, to be put onto the non-football injury list with an indefinite leave of absence.[39]

On April 13, 2014, Smith was detained and arrested following an incident at the Los Angeles International Airport in which Smith became belligerent and uncooperative with a TSA agent, who alleged Smith claimed he was carrying a bomb.[40] After interviews revealed that Smith did not clearly state he was carrying a bomb, the Los Angeles City Attorney decided to drop the charges. Smith was suspended for nine games for the 2014 season.

On August 6, 2015, Smith was arrested in Santa Clara, California, for an alleged hit and run after driving under the influence, and vandalism charges.[41] He was released by the 49ers the next day as a result.[20]

On March 9, 2017, Smith was a passenger with a friend driving to Smith's house at 12:00 AM, when the San Francisco police department found out both Smith and the driver were under the influence after smashing into a police car. Even though Smith was not the driver, both Smith and his friend were detained by the San Francisco Police Department for questioning. The next day, Smith and his friend were released. No arrests were made.[42][43]

On September 23, 2017, it was announced that Smith had agreed to plead no contest to hit and run in the 2015 incident in exchange for the DUI charges being dropped. He was sentenced to 20 days in jail. During his sentence, he was ordered to attend a treatment facility, and undergo anger management classes. After his release, he was prohibited from entering any bars or other establishments where alcohol is the primary commodity being sold.[44]

On March 3, 2018, someone called the police from Smith's home and reported that he had consumed multiple bottles of tequila and then bit her wrists. Smith reportedly fled the home before police arrived. San Francisco police did not comment on the specifics but did state that domestic violence of a "non-lethal" nature had occurred and they were seeking out Smith for questioning about the incident.[25] On March 23, 2018, Smith was arrested for violation of a court order, where he was ordered to stay away from a woman he assaulted earlier in the month. The woman was revealed to be Smith's fiancee. This picked up from a previous incident that occurred on March 3, where Smith pleaded not guilty on four misdemeanor counts, including domestic violence, assault with force likely to produce great bodily injury, false imprisonment, and vandalism.[45] On April 8, 2018, Smith was arrested for violations in conditions to his bail.[46]

On April 19, 2021, the St. Bernard Parish Sheriff's Office issued an arrest warrant for Smith for second-degree battery.[47] Smith surrendered on April 21, and was released on a $25,000 bond with an arraignment scheduled for July 14.[48]

# ? Dec 8, 2021 16:26

Kalli: Jun 2, 2001

C-Euro posted:

Howling with laughter at this. But honestly I never would have expected him to have that game-winning drive in him, so sure, give him this.

Apparently the first Lion to win a potw award since Calvin Johnson in 2015

# ? Dec 8, 2021 16:30

wandler20: Nov 13, 2002; How many Championships?

https://twitter.com/RapSheet/status/1468611561312989187?s=20

# ? Dec 8, 2021 17:05

a neat cape: Feb 22, 2007; Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

shyduck posted:

https://twitter.com/ProFootballTalk/status/1468575718929956865?t=zMOpDHsYE8vYVgokry0dHg&s=19

https://twitter.com/ProFootballTalk/status/1468577337121939456?t=DrWoo0bU4O7fxp09C6tbkg&s=19

# ? Dec 8, 2021 17:19

R.D. Mangles: Jan 10, 2004

DariusLikewise posted:

Greg Olsen is constantly a guy I see on TV and it takes me at least 45 seconds of staring directly at him and deep thought to figure out who he is every time

He has a noticeably super long face.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 17:26

Silly Burrito: Nov 27, 2007; SET A COURSE FOR
THE FLAVOR QUADRANT

White Hot Herbie update:

https://twitter.com/YetiOrKnot/status/1468623902741970944

# ? Dec 8, 2021 17:53

3 DONG HORSE: May 22, 2008; I'd like to thank Satan for everything he's done for this organization

Only 804 retweets. Our odds are good, boys!!

# ? Dec 8, 2021 17:57

Impossibly Perfect Sphere: Nov 6, 2002; They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

By the numbers, White Hot Herbie is much more likely to end up being burned in effigy than enjoyed by a Chargers' fan.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 17:58

Valt: May 14, 2006; Oh HELL yeah.; Ultra Carp

DariusLikewise posted:

Greg Olsen is constantly a guy I see on TV and it takes me at least 45 seconds of staring directly at him and deep thought to figure out who he is every time

I'm sorry he is easy, he is of course buff Dexter.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 17:58

LargeHadron: May 19, 2009; They say, "you mean it's just sounds?" thinking that for something to just be a sound is to be useless, whereas I love sounds just as they are, and I have no need for them to be anything more than what they are.

Chucktesla posted:

Ryan tannehill looks like a cop

Lol, solid.

He might very well be a nice guy, but he absolutely has resting jerk face.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 18:11

a neat cape: Feb 22, 2007; Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

Silly Burrito posted:

White Hot Herbie update:

https://twitter.com/YetiOrKnot/status/1468623902741970944

Let's do this

# ? Dec 8, 2021 18:11

Hot Diggity!: Apr 3, 2010; SKELITON_BRINGING_U_ON.GIF

Some facts about the REAL NVP

https://twitter.com/NFLonCBS/status/1468360919302369280

# ? Dec 8, 2021 18:16

fsif: Jul 18, 2003

Worth noting the Bills this season are 4-1 (.800) when Trubisky plays and 3-4 (.429) when he doesn't.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 18:26

Play: Apr 25, 2006; Strong stroll for a mangy stray

He Just Wins

# ? Dec 8, 2021 18:32

Impossibly Perfect Sphere: Nov 6, 2002; They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

fsif posted:

Worth noting the Bills this season are 4-1 (.800) when Trubisky plays and 3-4 (.429) when he doesn't.

You joke but sports writers still toting the chestnut about how so-and-so team always wins when they have a ton of running yards in the second half.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 18:34

really queer Christmas: Apr 22, 2014

Hot Diggity! posted:

Some facts about the REAL NVP

https://twitter.com/NFLonCBS/status/1468360919302369280

Feel like poo poo, just want him back

# ? Dec 8, 2021 19:07

a neat cape: Feb 22, 2007; Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

https://twitter.com/PFF_AndrewR/status/1467855154414342147?t=1hr-CgbzkjUMnsFuDT6PMw&s=19

PFF is trash

# ? Dec 8, 2021 19:20

fsif: Jul 18, 2003

Impossibly Perfect Sphere posted:

You joke but sports writers still toting the chestnut about how so-and-so team always wins when they have a ton of running yards in the second half.

Also just realized how weird it is that including the games Trubs missed for Covid, the Bills have had a backup quarterback play in 6 of their 13 games. Allen hasn't missed a snap for injury.

Total dominance to have that many non-competitive games. This is what 7 seeds are made of.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 19:26

Kalli: Jun 2, 2001

a neat cape posted:

PFF is trash

PFF�s 2021 Third-Quarter All-Pro Team

OFFENSE
QB TOM BRADY, TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS
Second Team: Kirk Cousins, Minnesota Vikings

# ? Dec 8, 2021 19:47

sean10mm: Jun 29, 2005; It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, MAD-2R World

Kalli posted:

PFF�s 2021 Third-Quarter All-Pro Team

OFFENSE
QB TOM BRADY, TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS
Second Team: Kirk Cousins, Minnesota Vikings

That looks fi... wait what :butt:

# ? Dec 8, 2021 19:51

wyoak: Feb 14, 2005; a glass case of emotion; Fallen Rib

a neat cape posted:

https://twitter.com/PFF_AndrewR/status/1467855154414342147?t=1hr-CgbzkjUMnsFuDT6PMw&s=19

PFF is trash

Pff is pretty dumb but Burrow played well and if Jamarr Chase doesn�t keystone cop that should-be touchdown into a Charger INT this wouldn�t really be that hot of a take

Herbie�s still better though

# ? Dec 8, 2021 19:56

Kirios: Jan 26, 2010

Not sure why it's a big deal either way - they're both gonna be top 5 QBs in a year or two.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 20:12

Nodoze: Aug 17, 2006; If it's only for a night I can live without you

sean10mm posted:

That looks fi... wait what

When is the last time you looked at the season Cousins is having, you'll probably be surprised

# ? Dec 8, 2021 20:15

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# ? May 9, 2024 14:41

Kalli: Jun 2, 2001

Nodoze posted:

When is the last time you looked at the season Cousins is having, you'll probably be surprised

Cousins and Garoppolo had some advanced stats guys arguing that they need ways to measure plays QB's don't make, because those two do way better in metrics then anyone with eyes thinks because they play ultra-safe football.

# ? Dec 8, 2021 20:26

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > NFL Week 14 News/Views: 2 out of 3 ain't bad.

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