BYOB Small Claims Court

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Trying

I swear on the Bible that I am two people sharing a large coat

# ? Dec 20, 2021 13:56

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 4, 2024 12:02

google THIS

We, the jury, find the defendant

(dramatic pause)

v. BYOB

(courtroom erupts into applause and cheering, except for the defendant's mother, who quietly sobs)

# ? Dec 20, 2021 16:13

Sherbert Hoover: Working hard, thank you!

google THIS posted:

We, the jury, find the defendant

(dramatic pause)

v. BYOB

(courtroom erupts into applause and cheering, except for the defendant's mother, who quietly sobs)

^{this sig is protected by Simsmagic!}

# ? Dec 20, 2021 16:13

Buttchocks: No, I like my hat, thanks.

Small Calms Court hands everyone a kitten when the enter the courtroom.

# ? Dec 20, 2021 21:00

Ass-penny

google THIS posted:

We, the jury, find the defendant

(dramatic pause)

v. BYOB

(courtroom erupts into applause and cheering, except for the defendant's mother, who quietly sobs)

sounds like somebody should school that mom on byob imo

thank you so much to nesamdoom for the scurry fall sig!

(┛◉Д◉)┛彡┻━┻ #YesNutNovember - add this to your sig if you love and support BYOB's own nut

# ? Dec 20, 2021 21:05

Escape From Noise

Sentenced to time served. The time? 4:20.

# ? Dec 21, 2021 01:40

blaise rascal: "Duke, Duke, Duke, Duke of Pearl...."

They Might Be posted:

bend and twist my tiny fender

maim my car out on the highwayyyy

ty vanisher, ty khanstant

# ? Dec 22, 2021 04:08

blaise rascal: "Duke, Duke, Duke, Duke of Pearl...."

You all are being BYOB Small Claims Court Jesters

ty vanisher, ty khanstant

# ? Dec 22, 2021 04:10

Dr. Honked: eat it you slaaaaaaag

i would like to present my penis as evidence

^{thanks deep dish pete moss and Plant MONSTER}

# ? Dec 23, 2021 15:08

pixaal: All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

that's a strangle gavel wait that's not a gavel.

sig by owlhawk911

# ? Dec 23, 2021 15:57

Bright Bart: False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped

I want to sue whoever formalized the Happy Holidays card and skipped me, in The Goon Doctor of all places. That I put no effort into getting on there is besides the point.

Looking for lawyers to take this case for exposure.

# ? Dec 23, 2021 16:09

google THIS

Dr. Honked posted:

i would like to present my penis ~~as evidence~~

# ? Dec 23, 2021 18:41

Derpies: by sebmojo

it�s me Derpies the judge and I keep setting all the court cases for 4:20 and giggling

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Dec 23, 2021 20:51

alexandriao

pixaal posted:

that's a strangle gavel wait that's not a gavel.

gavel nazing

# ? Dec 24, 2021 04:46

Twenty Four

I hear by find myself in contempt of not much of anything right now!

# ? Dec 25, 2021 01:28

Viginti Septem: Oculus Noctuae

BYOB'S mall claims. All mall incidents, all the time.

# ? Dec 25, 2021 02:06

your friend sk: (ヤイケス!)

Dr. Honked posted:

i would like to present my penis as evidence

bailiffs??

Join the BYOB Army

^{thank you again Saoshyant!!}

# ? Dec 25, 2021 02:41

Bright Bart: False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped

your friend sk posted:

bailiffs??

Sorry, we can't remove him from the courtroom. The bailiff was mesmerized into support by it's beauty. And the blind custodians we sent in as backup broke their back under its weight.

# ? Dec 25, 2021 04:05

JNCO BILOBA

Is this because I fell asleep in the drivethru

again

# ? Dec 26, 2021 06:18

Viginti Septem: Oculus Noctuae

JNCO BILOBA posted:

Is this because I fell asleep in the drivethru

again

Camera zooms out, you're in a Wendy's drivethru

# ? Dec 26, 2021 06:38

JNCO BILOBA

can the bailif get me a spicy chicken

# ? Dec 26, 2021 06:45

Escape From Noise

JNCO BILOBA posted:

can the bailif. get me a spicy chicken!

# ? Dec 26, 2021 07:36

google THIS

Crave Case dismissed

# ? Dec 26, 2021 18:49

Viginti Septem: Oculus Noctuae

google THIS posted:

Crave Case dismissed

That got a lol

# ? Dec 26, 2021 19:07

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

Judge: Court reporter, what are you doing?

Marjorie (the court reporter): I'm having a problem, your honor...

Judge: What sort of problem are you having?

M(TCR): I'm trying to keep up with the current case and I can't... I- well, I just CAN'T!

Judge: What's the problem? What can't you do?

M(TCR): I don't know how to _{_{empty quote}} *sobs*

Judge: COURT IS IN RECESS! EVERY, GLOMP MARJORIE AND COMFORT HER!

# ? Dec 26, 2021 19:36

JNCO BILOBA

If I can't sue my dog for sneezing into my grinder of kief, whats it all for whats anything for

# ? Dec 26, 2021 20:48

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

There are no small claims, only small plaintiffs

# ? Dec 27, 2021 12:37

Twenty Four

The judge asked the bailiff to escort me out of small claims court for being too tall.

# ? Dec 27, 2021 12:42

Dr. Honked: eat it you slaaaaaaag

my claim is small, but spicy and pungent. it might be a bit too spicy for this court

^{thanks deep dish pete moss and Plant MONSTER}

# ? Dec 27, 2021 17:35

Viginti Septem: Oculus Noctuae

Dr. Honked posted:

my claim is small, but spicy and pungent. it might be a bit too spicy for this court

Judge Balakrishnan looks upon you with scorn

# ? Dec 27, 2021 17:38

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

Sure, I'll swear in but the most I'm gonna do is "heckin' " so I hope you're good with that?

# ? Dec 28, 2021 02:34

Escape From Noise

barnold posted:

the only small claim in this court is your freakin dick and balls

Dr. Honked posted:

i would like to present my penis as evidence

# ? Dec 29, 2021 06:03

Dr. Honked: eat it you slaaaaaaag

i would also like the court to take my balls into consideration

^{thanks deep dish pete moss and Plant MONSTER}

# ? Dec 30, 2021 18:16

pixaal: All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

I would like to declare a mistrial on the fact the defendant is too cute

sig by owlhawk911

# ? Dec 30, 2021 18:20

Ass-penny

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:

There are no small claims, only small plaintiffs

# ? Dec 31, 2021 02:28

The Walrus Cancer: If we were all trees, there'd be no more wars. 'Cause we'd be trees.

Someone played the world's tiniest violin for me earlier. But when I looked closer, they weren't playing anything! They were just pretending. This is fraud!

# ? Dec 31, 2021 02:52

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

OBJECTION, your honor, I'm gay!

# ? Dec 31, 2021 14:45

JNCO BILOBA

I�ll allow it

# ? Jan 1, 2022 06:08

Bright Bart: False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped

In my 36 years on the bench I have never seen balls that big.

# ? Jan 1, 2022 09:05

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 4, 2024 12:02

Bright Bart: False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped

Trial by combat determines the winner but it's wrestling in a kiddie pool full of jello and also we eat the jello as a snack because there was no lunch.

Bright Bart fucked around with this message at 12:09 on Jan 1, 2022

# ? Jan 1, 2022 09:07

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