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putin is a cunt
Apr 5, 2007

BOY DO I SURE ENJOY TRASH. THERE'S NOTHING MORE I LOVE THAN TO SIT DOWN IN FRONT OF THE BIG SCREEN AND EAT A BIIIIG STEAMY BOWL OF SHIT. WARNER BROS CAN COME OVER TO MY HOUSE AND ASSFUCK MY MOM WHILE I WATCH AND I WOULD CERTIFY IT FRESH, NO QUESTION
When I was a kid I remember taking some poos that genuinely felt like they would tear something, but eventually by the time I was an adult I was blessed with an anus capable of amazing things.

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putin is a cunt
Apr 5, 2007

BOY DO I SURE ENJOY TRASH. THERE'S NOTHING MORE I LOVE THAN TO SIT DOWN IN FRONT OF THE BIG SCREEN AND EAT A BIIIIG STEAMY BOWL OF SHIT. WARNER BROS CAN COME OVER TO MY HOUSE AND ASSFUCK MY MOM WHILE I WATCH AND I WOULD CERTIFY IT FRESH, NO QUESTION

StoryTime posted:

There was this one time I had a really bad day at my job. Once I was finished there I decided to have a kebab pizza and a beer on the way home since I really didn't feel like cooking. After slamming down the pizza and the beer in record time, I started walking towards home. But something wasn't right, there was a rumbling in my stomach very unlike anything I'd experienced before. It quickly turned into an intense need to poo poo. I'm not talking about "oh, I should visit a toilet soon", I'm talking about the Houdini of diarrhea trying his best to escape my rear end, I'm talking about Gustavus Adolphus also known as The Lion of Midnight besieging the fortress of my anus. There was a bus stop with a bunch of people waiting near my home, I had to walk behind it because I didn't want to embarrass myself in front of them. I wanted to run, but it was no longer an option. I managed to hold until I opened the front door of my apartment, but lunging for the bathroom was too much and I shat my pants so hard that liquid poo poo was flowing out from both trouser legs. I took off all the clothes, took a shower, stuffed the clothes into the washing machine, and then took another shower.

So that's probably the most impactful poo poo I've taken, thanks for reading.

Jesus just give this guy the trophy

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