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Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
.
at least I have weed lmao

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Seth Pecksniff
May 27, 2004

can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.
Inshallah your putrid lineage dies at last

jimmyjams
Jan 10, 2001


King Kong of Megadongs
Gobblin' them mega schlongs
Makin' sure they mega long
Stroke' 'em if they mega strong
fart

Bismuth
Jun 11, 2010

by Azathoth
Hell Gem
:secondpost:

Schweinhund
Oct 23, 2004

:derp:   :kayak:                                     
It's for the best. I mean for women. It sucks for you.

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
.

Schweinhund posted:

It's for the best. I mean for women. It sucks for you.

lol

Mooey Cow
Jan 27, 2018

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Pillbug
That's impossible as life fucks us all

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
.

Mooey Cow posted:

That's impossible as life fucks us all

true

spleen merchant
Jul 1, 2007
Fun Shoe
I you bathe and aren't seething with misogyny/expectation (assuming you're attracted to women), I'm sure there's someone out there willing to touch your genitals (and smoke your weed).

Professor Shark
May 22, 2012

Not necessarily, op--- they have these pillows you can marry now!!

bradzilla
Oct 15, 2004

Alan 00x

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
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you know what though? I don't care anymore lol

roomtone
Jul 1, 2021

by Fluffdaddy

(and can't post for 26 days!)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcAsad-E9CQ

Devils Affricate
Jan 22, 2010
Post a picture of yourself OP

ChunTheUnavoidable
Sep 27, 2021

it’s normal to focus on the one thing you don’t have in life and blame it for why you’re unhappy but that’s not really how life works. if you hooked up with someone tomorrow you’d probably be glad about it but you’d feel the same way in like a week. it’s not magical or anything and it won’t fix your issues. the best way to be happy is to continually try to learn new things and improve yourself and avoid falling into a rut of just doing the same self destructive things every day and feeling sorry for yourself. If you die a virgin, oh well. Most people die without doing the things they wanted to do. Set some other goals for yourself

ChunTheUnavoidable fucked around with this message at 13:40 on Jan 9, 2022

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
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Devils Affricate posted:

Post a picture of yourself OP

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
.

ChunTheUnavoidable posted:

it’s normal to focus on the one thing you don’t have in life and blame it for why you’re unhappy but that’s not really how life works. if you hooked up with someone tomorrow you’d probably be glad about it but you’d feel the same way in like a week. it’s not magical or anything and it won’t fix your issues. the best way to be happy is to continually try to learn new things and improve yourself and avoid falling into a rut of just doing the same self destructive things every day and feeling sorry for yourself

no trust me I am VERY thankful I am ME not someone else

STABASS
Apr 18, 2009

Fun Shoe
me too op. unfortunately anytime I work up the will to get there out there and do something about it, after I spend 5 minutes trying to be around people I can't stop thinking about how much I want to be alone. maybe someday I will figure out how to seal the deal in those 5 minutes. rooting for you :)

Devils Affricate
Jan 22, 2010

Clean up that kitchen and you will be getting mad pussy/dick

e: also smile for us a little more, toots

Caesar Saladin
Aug 15, 2004


a bit of grooming would make you feel better

a decent haircut and a shave and a shirt that isn't garfield coloured

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
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I don't groom myself because I never leave the house and when I do I'm wearing a mask.

ChunTheUnavoidable
Sep 27, 2021

its unreasonable to expect someone to break into your house to have sex with you op

STABASS
Apr 18, 2009

Fun Shoe
no offense intended op but have you considered losing some weight? if you don't care about being fat that's fine, it's a personal choice, but I think you made this thread because you are sad, and you have sad eyes in your picture, and being in better shape might make you feel less sad. if you want any fitness advice I am pretty knowledgeable about those kind of things so feel free to ask :)

ChunTheUnavoidable
Sep 27, 2021

yeah get some exercise. You feel happier when you eat healthy food and exercise op

Doctor J Off
Dec 28, 2005

There Is
Did you try downloading tinder, op

Caesar Saladin
Aug 15, 2004

Doctor J Off posted:

Did you try downloading tinder, op

thats probably just gonna bum him out more

Zero VGS
Aug 16, 2002
ASK ME ABOUT HOW HUMAN LIVES THAT MADE VIDEO GAME CONTROLLERS ARE WORTH MORE
Lipstick Apathy

Doctor J Off posted:

Did you try downloading grindr, op

Doctor J Off
Dec 28, 2005

There Is

Caesar Saladin posted:

thats probably just gonna bum him out more

Well first he just needs some images of himself holding a log over shoulder or something, gotta lean in to your look

ChunTheUnavoidable
Sep 27, 2021

we should do one of those movie scenes where he goes on a dinner date and we’re all giving him advice in an earpiece

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
.
I agree with you guys about losing weight. I have a meeting with my weight containment program soon.

Doctor J Off
Dec 28, 2005

There Is

ChunTheUnavoidable posted:

it’s normal to focus on the one thing you don’t have in life and blame it for why you’re unhappy but that’s not really how life works. if you hooked up with someone tomorrow you’d probably be glad about it but you’d feel the same way in like a week. it’s not magical or anything and it won’t fix your issues. the best way to be happy is to continually try to learn new things and improve yourself and avoid falling into a rut of just doing the same self destructive things every day and feeling sorry for yourself. If you die a virgin, oh well. Most people die without doing the things they wanted to do. Set some other goals for yourself

Anyway this is real advice. True happiness and validation can only come from within based on acceptance of yourself. Just hit the gym, stay positive, and sever from whatever's keeping you down, and eventually you will be changed into a new version of yourself

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
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honestly my drive is pretty low I don't even want to have sex on the regular now. I just focus on the heart

Elentor
Dec 14, 2004

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Your avatar text made me rub my screen a few times OP, so good job.

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
.

Elentor posted:

Your avatar text made me rub my screen a few times OP, so good job.

how do I get a picture avatar

Elentor
Dec 14, 2004

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Alan 00X posted:

how do I get a picture avatar

You go here OP https://store.somethingawful.com/products/titlechange.php

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
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oh that costs monye

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AFoWM83g-KY

runnypoops
Mar 26, 2016

been there. done that. prove yourself to me.
Sex is disgusting

Alan 00X
Dec 15, 2017
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runnypoops posted:

Sex is disgusting

yeah lol

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syntaxfunction
Oct 27, 2010
Hey, Alan is back! Hi Alan :)

Also sex is kind of whatever. If you can't survive without sex that raises a lot of concerns tbh.

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