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Imagine you are the host to a tapeworm. You are tired of that motherfucker leeching off the slaw dogs you cram down your piehole, and you do not trust these new-fangled dewormers. So you concentrate like a Goku spirit bomb and powerfully fart out the parasite(s) inside your body. A violent, messy, red and brown rupture like a Christmas cherry-filled chocolate blasting out your rear end like a cannon. Getting the whole thing out your poo poo-chute like perfectly yanking out a thistle weed in the March slushy soil. I think it could be possible if you try really, really hard 
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Jan 13, 2022 01:36
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| # ? May 11, 2024 21:17 |
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Ok I will
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Jan 13, 2022 01:36
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waste of a perfectly good tapeworm
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Jan 13, 2022 01:44
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The gently caress did my tapeworm eat!?
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Jan 13, 2022 01:45
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Jan 13, 2022 01:46
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Zeluth posted:The gently caress did my tapeworm eat!? Ur rear end
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Jan 13, 2022 01:47
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I think you just blow out the segment not the tapeworm itself op
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Jan 13, 2022 01:47
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gas thread ban op
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Jan 13, 2022 01:48
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I think the force it would require to fart out a tapeworm hard enough for it to launch out would mean that you shart out everything in your system along with it.
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Jan 13, 2022 01:54
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Works for cats who push really hard during birth contractions so it seems plausible https://www.facebook.com/tinytapeworms/videos/453263612606345/ (gross, btw)
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Jan 13, 2022 01:57
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You don't need to fart really hard, OP. Just take some  and you'll poo poo them all out along with your lower intestine.
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Jan 13, 2022 01:59
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phew thanks for the heads up i was just about to watch the video of a cat giving birth to kittens covered in tapeworms but then you said it was gross
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Jan 13, 2022 01:59
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sounds to me like you're describing advanced farting, op. not sure i follow
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Jan 13, 2022 02:15
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Tapeworms help you keep a normal weight whilst stuffing your disgusting gob with food that actually tastes good. Why would you want to dislodge them?
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Jan 13, 2022 02:16
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Looks like your mom told you the truth of your birth, OP
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Jan 13, 2022 02:34
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Waltzing Along posted:Looks like your mom told you the truth of your birth, OP Lmao
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Jan 13, 2022 02:36
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why do the worst posters always resort to bathroom humor
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Jan 13, 2022 02:44
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you are what you eat
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Jan 13, 2022 02:52
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at what point does it stop being farting the tapeworm and become making GBS threads the tapeworm
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Jan 13, 2022 02:53
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Parsley posted:at what point does it stop being farting the tapeworm and become making GBS threads the tapeworm Probably the amount of liquid vs gas involved
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Jan 13, 2022 02:55
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You'll know when you hear the screams.
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Jan 13, 2022 03:05
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Ngl OP, I have pondered the same
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Jan 13, 2022 03:06
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Just rolls out with a toot then rolls back like a party favor blowout.
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Jan 13, 2022 03:24
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I tried this, but all that came out was a Burger King onion ring. Zesty!
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Jan 13, 2022 04:26
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No because they have hooks that hook into your intestines op
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Jan 13, 2022 04:34
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this means i could fart tapeworms into an rear end
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Jan 13, 2022 04:49
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I don't know about tapeworms, but I bet you could blow pinworms out your rear end.
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Jan 13, 2022 05:04
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if you cut me off in traffic you can blow anything out your rear end for all i care
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Jan 13, 2022 05:12
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Imagine you wrote this thread. Now imagine how your children look at you when they read it.
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Jan 13, 2022 05:25
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Depends what food is fueling the fart and how spicy the fart is. If its a real sharp fart, it might have detached the tapeworm.
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Jan 13, 2022 05:59
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Tapeworms help prevent allergies. Why would you want my hay fever to come back OP?
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Jan 13, 2022 06:24
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Weka posted:Tapeworms help prevent allergies. Why would you want my hay fever to come back OP? That's like saying tape worms are beneficial because they help you lose weight.
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Jan 13, 2022 06:38
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Look I don't have a tapeworm, so I am not gonna go verifying this for you or anything but I can all but assure you that my rear end is capable of blasting out far more stubborn things than mere tapeworms. A tapeworm would be like a scared, lonely survivor doing its best, holding onto a swaying palm tree for dear life in the middle of a hurricane, considering the forces my rear end can generate. My farts are loaded, primed, and fired with such force that I have to train my anus to close rapidly and tightly so seal the resulting vacuum, or else the hot gasses just expelled would attempt to get back inside me. Ask a firefighter about backdrafts sometime. It's not good. Once the vacuum is secure inside my rectum, I have every element necessary to expel tapeworms, poops that are shaped too uncomfortably for my butt, and poops that should be dealt with outside my body. Unusable poops are discarded, and their dreams reach an abrupt end. We shall spare no tame morning the losses of those refused to succeed together. The whole operations is referred to as the Ministry Plan for Intestinal Wellness, but they have omitted the most important part about the plan: its use of human subjects. Of the 4 subjects initially selected, only I remain. I was not one of the 4 original subjects. I am their last resort. Subject 1: Raul Pescadero - Established in town as a local fisherman. Family ties, no particularly special words to say about him. Average results from basic phyiscal testing. Subject 2: Billie Scotchcroft - Just some girl of the street. Probably east whatever is available. Food is not considering a major part of how to reach the end. Subject 3: Big Hank Pankie - Big Hank has many novelty hats that could potentially serve as temporary toilets if need be, but this remains a support role. Where is the true assualt fart model? Subject 4: God drat it. They got my sister, Imoen. They're gonna be rid of her real fast. We don't have much time to lose. Get the megablast cages ready to install, I am clearly the only one capable of surviving the operation. Send these subjects back home. SEND THEM BACK *fade to black and then to white* Good morning mr Noise. I hear you have a.... quite amenable midsection, and that you intend to employ your devices for the entertianment of the empire. uhhh yeah sure do boss. Not just pullin this outta my rear end, I got research and devices and stuff. Trust me you'l have a new man by the end of this By the time the sick, forced contest had been established, planned, and ready to start, I had only managed to install as single intestinal unit. They're each about the side of like a 10 cubic centimeters, but shaped to fit the body. The take your more important parts out just to build up pressure for the gun. You need to be able fire accurately and with power. Less than 10 minutes before my attempt. I close the shades outside my window to block my sight from the occasional burst of flesh or blood resulting from an improperly tuned rail or other system part, which we had no personal control over. "That's as good as it's going to get" they tell me, looking over the modular assembly that comprises my torso from solar plexus to taint. This must work. I sit in the official chair, which soon grows little metal arms, or something. They called them "stirrups" and told me to let me hold my legs up. At this moment, my system talked to me. I heard it in my mind. "Show these motherfuckers what we can really do" was a repeated sentiment, until I understand, and was forced to comply. Therefore, I reached as far as I truly could, and blasted out everything that could possibly blast. Does it feel strange, talking directly to a sentient robotic module that was used as part of a larger system to quote "poo poo your nude father out of a robotic gastrointestinal tract and anus at speeds that would be dangerous to reach in a vehicle? Do you feel proud of how far your father was made to fly after being instantly reconstituted into an approximation of his own poo poo to be used as ammunition? Would you be prepared to give your body, sentient anus module and all, toward progress for a future you may never live to see? This, we do for the strength of our kind. Your children will one day be one of the assless, if they choose. note: modules interchangeable. Slippery When Wetware does not advice or accept responsibility for any damages resulting from the use of sexually-oriented modules in combination with living firearms modules.
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Jan 13, 2022 07:14
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i did this once, but the shockwave caused a vacuum in the wake of the explosion, and the worms got sucked right back up there
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Jan 13, 2022 07:17
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gapeworms
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Jan 13, 2022 07:42
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Extra row of tits posted:Imagine you wrote this thread. And just imagine if your children are tapeworms.
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Jan 13, 2022 10:57
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I could probably fart myself inside out
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Jan 13, 2022 11:19
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straining your butthole is how you get hemorrhoids a better option is to stick an endoscope disguised as a tapeworm up there. learn their ways, gain their trust, and then cruelly lead them outside to their doom.
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Jan 13, 2022 12:02
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i just yell tane at my rear end in a top hat really loud and the worm gets scared and scurries out
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Jan 13, 2022 12:22
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This thread made me smile, then frown. But it made my tapeworm laugh so I gave it a 5.
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Jan 13, 2022 13:28
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