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or even *a* real you? everyone has different personas for different situations, but does the one you use on sa feel like an authentic version of yourself? |
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May 8, 2022 20:25
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| # ? Apr 30, 2024 19:13 |
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not anymore. fyad bullied me into putting up an ironic front, now all i do is cry myself to sleep at night and order uber eats to fill the empty void inside of me |
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May 8, 2022 20:30
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You tell me, OP 
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May 8, 2022 23:06
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probably as authentic as it is possible to be while posting anonymously on the internet. making this in byob is going to skew your results too, I think there's a lot less irony posting here than some other SA folders. |
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May 8, 2022 23:25
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authentic posting comes not from any delusion of self but springs, entire, into existence as from the formless void. *splurble* uh, what were we talking about?
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May 9, 2022 00:48
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There is no me; there is only the breath of God stirring up the dust of the earth until it comes to rest again. |
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May 9, 2022 04:41
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Yep |
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May 9, 2022 07:41
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to a certain degree, all social interactions are performative, op. consciously or unconsciously, different roles are assumed depending on context. oh course, these roles are simultaneously being interpreted by the audience, and intended signals can easily be interpreted differently. otoh, i'm a bot |
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May 9, 2022 11:53
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rear end-penny posted:probably as authentic as it is possible to be while posting anonymously on the internet. making this in byob is going to skew your results too, I think there's a lot less irony posting here than some other SA folders. yeah but I did want at least SOME sincere answers Buttchocks posted:There is no me; there is only the breath of God stirring up the dust of the earth until it comes to rest again. 
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May 9, 2022 12:35
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i'm fake, but my posts are real
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May 9, 2022 14:57
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i think so i think most of my social interactions irl are the fake ones because we have to act a certain way at work etc. so people don't perceive us as weird
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May 9, 2022 15:39
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The Wicked ZOGA posted:or even *a* real you? everyone has different personas for different situations, but does the one you use on sa feel like an authentic version of yourself? Nah op I'm three trash bags of taco bell potatoes in a trench coat. |
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May 9, 2022 19:24
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I'm only real when I'm posting |
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May 9, 2022 20:08
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Posters only love you when they're posting - fleetwood mac
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May 9, 2022 21:02
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it's the me i want to be: a bit more cheerful and positive and friendly than i am in meatspace but i do not think anyone who knows me well would find any of my posts terribly surprising
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May 9, 2022 21:07
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the way i post here is closest to the way i am at home with spouse: lots of absent-minded stream of consciousness blathering and smiles and jokes and laughing about butts other places online i post more like i am out in public and have to "be respectable" and "be clothed" and all that dumb poo poo
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May 9, 2022 21:43
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same tbh |
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May 9, 2022 21:49
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Doesn't feel like it. But I guess people wouldn't be surprised I make these posts. If anything I'd like to be the respectable Bart seen here. |
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May 9, 2022 22:23
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It's pretty damned close. Whichever psychologist/philosopher first discussed wearing masks in everything we do in life, can get bent, even though it's true. I've been trying to figure out all the different masks I wear and stop doing so. But it's really tough in situations. Like in a job interview, are you supposed to just, be your true self (whatever the eff that is?), or sell yourself? I try to push myself to be as close as possible to that self, but it seems like we're always selling ourselves to others. I get damned close to the real me these days in everything I do, consequences-be-damned. I've lost several jobs back-to-back because I speak to bosses like I would a person in any other position, and some of them expect you to "respect the position" which just, lol. Like my current boss, the sous chef, was poking fun at a coworker for being short (he's neighbors with her IRL and has known her for years), and even though it was my first time working with the chef and my first day, I went ahead and joked just as I would with a long-time friend. Him to her: I don't know how short people can survive in life, etc. yuck yuck yuck. A big, smug smile on his face. (and it was all in good humor). Me to him: I'm just trying to figure out how you can fit in this kitchen with an ego that big. The whole kitchen went quiet, and then the chef just started laughing, "you'll fit right in." I mean, I guess I've just gotten to the place where I don't care if I don't? If I don't fit in, I'll move on. It's not my place to please everyone. BYOB is the closest I've ever been able to get to being "myself" online. But even that can change. I tend to view interactions I have as life experiences and levels that I can either pass or fail. For better or worse. I've never properly felt like I've "fit-in" with any group in life. My friends groups are always changing. It's usually me leaving them and finding others. Which sucks because I want a group that I feel comfortable with, but I've never fully found that. Again, byob is pretty close, but the reality is I don't even feel I properly fit in here. I'm just a scramble of brains and probably set up expectations that can never be reached by others. Viginti Septem fucked around with this message at 22:25 on May 9, 2022 https://i.imgur.com/9jTkSUL.mp4 |
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May 9, 2022 22:23
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Viginti Septem posted:It's pretty damned close. Whichever psychologist/philosopher first discussed wearing masks in everything we do in life, can get bent, even though it's true. as a kid who grew up with majoras mask the mask metaphor is super loving salient in my understanding of myself and my relations to others but i have always felt that a better metaphor is a light source and coloured gels. depending on the circumstance we alter the spectrum of light we express, or maybe it's intensity, but the source is always the same. i've also never really felt like i've fit in, even in the situations that i do fit in. i have friends who love and accept my eccentricity and the consequences of my mental illness, and a family who does the same, but that doesn't change how i feel, i guess.
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May 9, 2022 23:02
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Oh, serious answers? Okay, then. Yep. I feel like I have to put up a front for other places but this is pretty much legit me. I think another way of saying that is that I feel the most comfortable here. I mean, honestly, you're going to change your behavior depending on the social situation. That's just human nature. But this situation feels like the lowest effort, so inasmuch as any behavior I exhibit is more or less "real" than another, this is the one that takes the least amount of effort for me and is what I'd choose if I had the option in other situations. cruft fucked around with this message at 23:37 on May 9, 2022 |
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May 9, 2022 23:35
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As a kid who grew up with Ocarina of Time, I view everything as... small, vessel flute instruments?
https://i.imgur.com/9jTkSUL.mp4 |
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May 9, 2022 23:36
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Viginti Septem posted:As a kid who grew up with Ocarina of Time, I view everything as... small, vessel flute instruments? As a kid who grew up in Ocarina of Time, same. |
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May 9, 2022 23:38
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Viginti Septem posted:As a kid who grew up with Ocarina of Time, I view everything as... small, vessel flute instruments? things are frequently a matter of (air) pressure and placement yes
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May 9, 2022 23:39
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I'm just as irredeemably mediocre IRL so I reckon it's a close match  Viginti Septem posted:Like in a job interview, are you supposed to just, be your true self (whatever the eff that is?), or sell yourself? I'm just me for interviews because I've decided pretending I am different is too much effort if they do take you on. I have no idea what they are actually looking for personality wise and they sure as hell are not going to tell you straight, so stuff it, you get what you see and if that is not good enough I dodged a bullet IMO. Having said that, I also got headhunted for the last 3 positions (last was an internal move) so I think my results may be skewed 
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May 9, 2022 23:43
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Heather Papps posted:things are frequently a matter of (air) pressure and placement yes cruft posted:As a kid who grew up in Ocarina of Time, same. Like the scene in Beetlejuice in Juno's office with the football players realizing that they don't think they survived the bus crash, I'm suddenly not so confident that I ever made it out of the Lost Woods. 
https://i.imgur.com/9jTkSUL.mp4 |
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May 9, 2022 23:48
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job interviews pretty much requires people to lie |
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May 9, 2022 23:54
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i feel like my posting persona is a more frivolous version of real mebiosterous posted:the way i post here is closest to the way i am at home with spouse: lots of absent-minded stream of consciousness blathering and smiles and jokes and laughing about butts this sounds like an ideal relationship (sincere post) |
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May 10, 2022 06:26
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Nosfereefer posted:to a certain degree, all social interactions are performative, op. consciously or unconsciously, different roles are assumed depending on context. oh course, these roles are simultaneously being interpreted by the audience, and intended signals can easily be interpreted differently. This is a good post. It is good to post in byob with the authentic orbs   
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May 10, 2022 08:47
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Maybe the real reality was the posts we made along the way. |
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May 10, 2022 08:48
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It feels like an illusion, it's a character but not a bit. I don't think IRL me translates to the internet.
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May 10, 2022 11:03
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rear end-penny posted:Maybe the real reality was the posts we made along the way. |
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May 10, 2022 12:12
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perhaps my sig says something about the duality of orb
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May 10, 2022 12:13
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If we're going to realpost then: Yes, this is exactly how I act in real life, which makes people kind of flip out sometimes. I gave up trying to be "cool" and aloof and ironic decades ago and if I make a joke it's because it seemed funnier in my head. I just genuinely like people, if I have beef with them I tell them directly, and why, and usually we talk it out. If I tell someone I love them I mean it. And I love my friends, so I tell them a lot. I post here because it's nice and calm and most people that post here get that. We occasionally get people who think BYOB is only nice ironically and, maybe it was ten years ago. But we also grew and changed. Like you, dear reader. |
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May 10, 2022 12:33
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I am still haunted by the notion that sincerity is cringe and irony is necessary to be funny or entertaining, but if I'm trying too hard I can't be either (idk if I manage it when I'm *not* trying, but at least it matters less) |
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May 10, 2022 13:09
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The Wicked ZOGA posted:I am still haunted by the notion that sincerity is cringe and irony is necessary to be funny or entertaining, but if I'm trying too hard I can't be either (idk if I manage it when I'm *not* trying, but at least it matters less) At some point -- and you can't force this, it just has to happen -- you will stop caring about whether you are funny or entertaining. At this moment, you will have reaching posting enlightenment. |
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May 10, 2022 16:12
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cruft posted:At some point -- and you can't force this, it just has to happen -- you will stop caring about whether you are funny or entertaining. At this moment, you will have reaching posting enlightenment. If I'm being honest, 17 years of making dad jokes has really helped in the not-caring-whether-or-not-it's-funny department. |
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May 10, 2022 16:12
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My jokes are supposed to be funny?
https://i.imgur.com/9jTkSUL.mp4 |
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May 10, 2022 16:32
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Fourth panel of the intern meme: You all have jokes?! |
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May 10, 2022 17:42
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| # ? Apr 30, 2024 19:13 |
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if we're gonna realpost here, i'd like to add that by the very nature of posting (it being written, anonymous, but also recheckable for ages), all interactions on this site is going to be fundamentally different from a face-to-face chat anyway. that is not to say that my posting is insincere, but rather that any form of communication forms the message in a certain way. and that doesn't in any way make different kinds of self-expressions necessarily more genuine or not. personality imo is basically a social process, not something set in stone, but rather something that takes different forms in different settings. i don't really think what kind of a person "i truly am" devoid of any social context really makes sense. |
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May 10, 2022 21:24
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