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yep, we're headin to the goldmine
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May 20, 2022 07:10
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staberind posted:I wonder if the rosetta stone had any gags or marginalia...? it was a tax receipt so no
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May 20, 2022 07:23
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https://imperiumromanum.pl/en/curiosities/obscene-graffiti-of-ancient-romans/ Lotsa gems here. Pompeii is a treasure trove cause no one ever cleaned the grafetti up or painted over it. "Weep, you girls. My penis has given you up. Now it penetrates men’s behinds. Goodbye, wondrous femininity!"
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May 20, 2022 07:56
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My favorite from Pompeii or Herculaneum goes like: I came to gently caress all the women and drink all the wine and the wine is gone.
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May 20, 2022 08:25
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TK8325 posted:I came to gently caress all the women and drink all the wine and the wine is gone. The line has lived for ages, slightly adapted for modern times. "I came here to chew bubblegum and kick rear end, and I'm all out of bubblegum."
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May 20, 2022 08:32
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Ralph Crammed In posted:https://imperiumromanum.pl/en/curiosities/obscene-graffiti-of-ancient-romans/ "Theophilus, don’t perform oral sex on girls against the city wall like a dog" i mean, i'm gonna need you to give me some reasons why not here
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May 20, 2022 20:27
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Billy Ray Blowjob posted:The very first joke, and we see it in apes, would have been farting Well yes, based on my experience as a parent (have four kids) I can confirm that farts generally become funny at some point before age 1, and stop being funny... basically never.
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May 20, 2022 20:57
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precision posted:"Theophilus, don’t perform oral sex on girls against the city wall like a dog" Theophilus sounds like a cool dude.
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May 20, 2022 21:15
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Groke posted:Well yes, based on my experience as a parent (have four kids) I can confirm that farts generally become funny at some point before age 1, and stop being funny... basically never. i've legit never thought farts were funny and have always thought its weird i'm not saying that i've literally never laughed at a well constructed fart joke, but a well constructed joke can be about anything i'm just saying, farts are definitely not just "inherently funny" to me. theyre totally value neutral
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May 20, 2022 21:22
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precision posted:i've legit never thought farts were funny and have always thought its weird this explains a lot about you
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May 20, 2022 21:25
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Medieval, not ancient 
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May 20, 2022 21:27
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precision posted:"Theophilus, don’t perform oral sex on girls against the city wall like a dog" Their reason why not was already listed, it was doglike. Ancient Romans didn’t realize like we do today that dogs are a higher life form and we should aspire to be like them.
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May 20, 2022 22:46
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What kinda hosed up dogs did ancient Romans have huh
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May 20, 2022 22:54
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I dread to think, but they really liked making hats out of them for their army bro's
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May 20, 2022 22:57
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hot cocoa on the couch posted:this explains a lot about you sure, and posting this explains a lot about you we can do this all day, mother
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May 20, 2022 23:08
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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Satyr#/media/File:Komos_Douris_BM_E768.jpg Attic red depiction of a satyr balancing a wine cup on his erection (500-490 B.C.E.)
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May 20, 2022 23:11
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Thin
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May 20, 2022 23:14
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The bronies have always been with us.
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May 21, 2022 00:36
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"everyone knows it's wrong and bad to gently caress horses. what my kink presupposes is... maybe it's not?" 
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May 21, 2022 01:28
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Bestiality is illegal, but little known legal fact, at least in the PNW, you are allowed to gently caress or be hosed by a sasquatch. I seen it.
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May 21, 2022 01:34
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precision posted:sure, and posting this explains a lot about you i've revealed no new information about myself with that post - premise completely destroyed
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May 21, 2022 01:44
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fart
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May 21, 2022 01:46
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Nigmaetcetera posted:Their reason why not was already listed, it was doglike. Ancient Romans didn’t realize like we do today that dogs are a higher life form and we should aspire to be like them. Romans were too busy LARPing as wolves to give a ahir about dogs
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May 21, 2022 01:53
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HelleSpud posted:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Satyr#/media/File:Komos_Douris_BM_E768.jpg is that a Pythagorean cup? That's almost a shitpost in of itself
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May 21, 2022 01:55
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The Turin papyrus:  It's a bit of a mystery. It was not just an ordinary porno as a papyrus like this would be expensive to have made. It also, in addition to lots of people having sex, shows animals doing human activities. This plus the fact that some of the positions resembles poses that priestesses would've made have lead to a theory about the military in ancient Egypt commissioned a papyrus that made fun of the priests and elite.
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May 21, 2022 11:13
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Lmao @ those priests with their huge dongs having cool sex with hot women 
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May 21, 2022 11:26
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Love the dude either charging up a nice slap to dat thick rear end or maybe he's just waving at a buddy out of frame.
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May 21, 2022 12:13
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aa weird as it is it's even weirder to see Egyptians go off model
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May 21, 2022 14:20
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Colonel Cancer posted:What kinda hosed up dogs did ancient Romans have huh The Romans didn't have hosed up dogs and they loved them just the same as people today, and had special names for them just like we do (Spot, for example was used all the way back to ancient Rome as a dog's name). They were perfectly happy to have them as family members/pets. I dunno where all the posts about them not treating them the same come from, it's demonstrably untrue.
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May 21, 2022 14:51
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Mooey Cow posted:Lmao @ those priests with their huge dongs having cool sex with hot women
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May 21, 2022 14:54
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vxlci1d2rOg Great video about dogs.
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May 21, 2022 15:05
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Big Beef City posted:The Romans didn't have hosed up dogs and they loved them just the same as people today, and had special names for them just like we do (Spot, for example was used all the way back to ancient Rome as a dog's name). Sounds like a well measured defense... from a legionnaire! Take off your mask, Biggus Beefus
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May 21, 2022 15:06
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http://oracc.museum.upenn.edu/nimrud/livesofobjects/catordog/ Assiryan dog figurines found in a well in the palace of Assurnasirpal II, named: "Expeller of evil" (mušēṣu lemnūti) with white pigment and red spots (BM 30001) "Catcher of the enemy" (kāšid ayyāb) with red pigment (BM 30002) "Don't think, bite!" (ē tamtallik epuš pāka) with white pigment (BM 30003) "Biter of his foe!" (munaššiku gārîšu) with turquoise pigment (BM 30004) "Loud is his bark!" (dan rigiššu) with black pigment (BM 30005)
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May 21, 2022 22:34
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Alhazred posted:The Turin papyrus: It's amazing they had the time to make the pyramids
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May 21, 2022 22:47
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In the year 41 bc during the roman civil war both sides used slingshots against each other. Often these shots would have a message carved into them. Messages like: "Take that" "Here comes desert" "Hit Octavian in the rear end in a top hat" "Ouch" "Bald Lucius Antonius and Fulvia, spread your arse" "I am aiming for Fulvia's clitoris" "Sit on this, Octavian, you drilled out bitch" (this one also had a carving of a penis on it) "Octavian, you suck cock!"
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May 21, 2022 22:57
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Big Beef City posted:The Romans didn't have hosed up dogs and they loved them just the same as people today, and had special names for them just like we do (Spot, for example was used all the way back to ancient Rome as a dog's name).
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May 21, 2022 23:00
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War and Pieces posted:Absolutely nobody on earth treated dogs as well as people do these days untill the 50's if not latter oh ok
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May 21, 2022 23:03
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War and Pieces posted:Absolutely nobody on earth treated dogs as well as people do these days untill the 50's if not latter Henry the 3rd loved bichon frise dogs so much that he carried some in a ribboned basket he wore around his neck. https://www.akc.org/expert-advice/dog-breeds/the-bichon-frise-historys-sociable-survivor/ I’ll grant you that doesn’t necessarily constitute good treatment, but I think it’s logical to conclude that those dogs were spoiled.
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May 22, 2022 01:01
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Yeah the absolute only way you can defend that statement is regarding medical care, because obviously it's true there was no dog chemo or even spay/neuter until recently. But having a dog glued to your side, playing dressup with it, calling it your baby, giving it fancy people food, those are all very old behaviors.
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May 22, 2022 01:05
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i like nice words
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Yes they're definitely very odd behaviors
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May 22, 2022 01:07
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