UKMT Summer 2022 - The Pipes, The Pipes Are Empty

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT Summer 2022 - The Pipes, The Pipes Are Empty

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TACD: Oct 27, 2000

boo-ris

# ¿ Jun 4, 2022 13:45

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# ¿ May 10, 2024 15:35

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

Mega Comrade posted:

That's not what he's saying at all...

Please stop making us defend Macron, it makes me feel gross. He's a poo poo, but what he is saying here is absolutely correct and giving Russia an 'out' is the best way to maintain peace in Europe not only now but for the decades that follow.

If we have to protect Putin's feelings to avoid getting nuked, then surely it follows that Putin can get whatever he wants if his feelings are fragile enough?

# ¿ Jun 5, 2022 15:42

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

sebzilla posted:

https://twitter.com/SkyNews/status/1533444953849974785?t=OhMXdkrRyOkDoEp8eRNAwg&s=19

All hail our queen, Elizabeth the Deathless. May she rule for a thousand years!

An immortal holo-queen dining with Paddington Bear sounds way better than a real King Charles tbh

# ¿ Jun 5, 2022 15:49

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

You're arguing that to avoid further war, Putin has to be given an "out" so he can avoid embarrassment. But the problem with that is it isn't up to us to say what's a good enough out to avoid embarrassment, and the minimum viable "out" for Putin might well be far beyond the pale of what's acceptable for anybody else.

If we're forced to give an "out" because of the threat of nuclear war then Putin is incentivised to demand whatever insane poo poo he feels like, using the threat of nuclear war. The whole idea of being forced to provide an embarrassment�free exit from the war they started is a pointless tactical weakness.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2022 16:10

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

The Question IRL posted:

How do you agree to any form of deal with people like that when a deal is probably just a pretense so they can punch you on the face again.

but enough about the uk

# ¿ Jun 5, 2022 23:57

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

Guavanaut posted:

https://twitter.com/IrishMirror/status/1533737210805108739

The bad flag will be edited out on iPlayer so as to not cause undue distress to the English.

lmao I thought you were joking but

https://twitter.com/IrishMirror/status/1533737232862957568?s=20&t=_VcjZOjTdXDXr24bPRWRSQ

# ¿ Jun 6, 2022 14:56

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

Szmitten posted:

Boris Johnson is a sweaty vonce?

Boris Vonceson

# ¿ Jun 6, 2022 16:42

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

serious gaylord posted:

148 is a big big number. He's going to have to dish out favours for every single vote now, he has no majority.

lol he's not going to care. when he first got in didn't he lose something like 8 votes in a row and set a new record in the process?

# ¿ Jun 6, 2022 21:10

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

crispix posted:

i just cannot give a gently caress anymore

welcome to the fold brother

# ¿ Jun 7, 2022 11:29

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

Mebh posted:

Ah yes, the netflix model. Famously doing well in 2022 with a market full of bloodthirsty competitors with huge budgets. Totally not like the healthcare market at all.

https://www.screendaily.com/news/ne...US%20operation.

Well yeah, Netflix's problem is a lack of subscribers. The government's COVID policy will ensure NHS demand remains at record levels for years to come!

# ¿ Jun 7, 2022 14:10

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

I tried to look into private healthcare a while ago, but on top of them all excluding pre-existing conditions (which makes it loving useless for all the accumulated issues I can't see an NHS doctor for), none of the plans I found said anything about private GPs. They're all talk about their fancy hospitals and expensive surgery cover, but please can I just see a GP?

# ¿ Jun 7, 2022 22:54

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

forkboy84 posted:

Obviously I was asking a slightly niche question and by nature General Practioners can't know everything but boy was it a little shocking to see her just do what I could have done at home. I assumed there was an NHS website or at least journal access that I didn't have.

Yeah honestly this is basically how I justify self-diagnosing and self-medicating for a variety of issues (within reason). No point battling through the gauntlet and waiting a month to see a GP when I just give something a go and see if it helps.

Brendan Rodgers posted:

I reckon CBT will age very poorly, maybe there's some real research there and the tories are just loving it up, but being "treated" by what seems to be a 20 year old who went on some seminars, and that treatment essentially coming down to her making me write a list of my bad thoughts and then promise not to think them, is some kafkaesque poo poo.

From my (very limited) understanding, most practitioners that claim to offer CBT actually offer either a very small part or an extremely watered down version. I've been told I should try to find a CBT practitioner for all my amazing issues but also warned that it's extremely difficult to find a good one, and there's basically no way of knowing ahead of time unless you have a friend seeing the same person.

# ¿ Jun 8, 2022 10:13

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

crispix posted:

wonder how many people died because of that stupid oval office's words of wisdom

just how much aggression were you letting out in the rugby?

# ¿ Jun 8, 2022 10:32

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

https://twitter.com/guardian/status/1534507008937930758

Here comes the wave of �nevertheless��

# ¿ Jun 8, 2022 14:17

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

Necrothatcher posted:

feels weird to be on the same page as the average British voter:

https://twitter.com/jamesjohnson252/status/1534829739474567169?s=20&t=lPoiSw-SM0YV79AcGKe7Kw

drat, looks like Starmer is just too much of a radical hard-leftist to get any traction with voters. We need somebody more sensibly centrist!

# ¿ Jun 9, 2022 12:27

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

Pistol_Pete posted:

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-10898627/PETER-HITCHENS-Revolutionary-past-gives-lie-notion-Keir-Starmer-moderate.html

lmao the next Labour leader will be one of the Tory party defects

# ¿ Jun 9, 2022 15:26

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

Seems like this would appeal to Starmer fans https://twitter.com/RoseEmojiTico/status/1534931900766244866

# ¿ Jun 10, 2022 00:21

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

ThomasPaine posted:

Like ultimately, who cares? Just chill out and let people live their lives. It's the easiest thing in the world. All you have to do is absolutely nothing. Next time you get the urge to Log On just go watch a movie or something.

There�s equally no normal reason for people to get so worked up about homosexuality, or kinks, or interracial marriage, or any of the other aspects of people�s private business that certain people get obsessed over. Some people are just damaged in a particular way that makes them feel like everybody else has to be like them to be Normal, and not being Normal cannot be allowed.

People will argue there�s more to it and it�s worth understanding the root cause of their problems but TBH terfs and their ilk never argue about their obsession in good faith so I don�t see the point in wasting energy trying to figure out exactly what�s gone wrong with them. You�re not going to change their minds with debate.

# ¿ Jun 13, 2022 17:35

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

DesperateDan posted:

there used to be other competitors in the chocolate containing biscuit and raisins market too, cadburys had one and there was another one too I'm sure

just had a sudden uncomfortable flashback to that 90s ad with the sexy dancing fruit and nut bar

# ¿ Jun 14, 2022 00:22

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

E: on second thought the poster below me probably knows more about this than I do

TACD fucked around with this message at 13:04 on Jun 14, 2022

# ¿ Jun 14, 2022 12:33

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

Tesseraction posted:

holy loving poo poo

I�m speechless, this has stunned me into a stupor, what the gently caress

# ¿ Jun 14, 2022 13:56

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

TwoShanks posted:

"Skipping the dentist" makes it sound like a choice. I have a broken tooth but, and I quote, "tooth pain, no matter how bad, is not classed as an emergency". Every dentist within 15 miles of me is either not accepting new NHS patients or is willing to put me on a waiting list of "about two years". Literally every one of them happily offered to see me as a private patient though.

I�m not involved with it at all so I hope I�m not stepping out of line here but this sounds like exactly the sort of thing the UKMT fund is for

# ¿ Jun 14, 2022 18:02

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

https://twitter.com/guardian/status/1536757571561865218?s=20&t=21v9Co_vWnYnMddAdI0H1g

im not boring. please dont put in the newspaper that i am boring

e:

quote:

Keir Starmer has urged his shadow cabinet to stop briefing the press that he is boring, warning them: "What's boring is being in opposition."

loving fantastic quote, extremely forensic

# ¿ Jun 14, 2022 18:30

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

It's kinda surprising when you look into it how much of the way we eat sushi here isn't actually traditional at all:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bDL8yu34fz0

# ¿ Jun 15, 2022 22:16

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

I think it�s worth remembering he did drunkenly hit a cyclist with his car, that�s pretty interesting

# ¿ Jun 17, 2022 10:28

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

Camrath posted:

Somehow I can�t see Keith leaving that as a suicide note, though I�d be happy to see his take on one..

Keith's suicide note would obviously be a catchy three-word slogan:

Regrets
Commiserations
Farewell

The AI had other ideas:

Only registered members can see post attachments!

# ¿ Jun 17, 2022 11:52

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

Tesseraction posted:

lol, link the AI generator if you could?

I'm using the one at https://app.inferkit.com/demo, there might be better ones.

But I am kinda loving this one, lol

quote:

Keir Starmer, pistol in hand, sits down to write his suicide note. He begins: "Hi kids, I think you know me. I am your favourite teacher. I taught you stuff. Got you to sit up straight, walk properly, tie your shoelaces and maybe have a go at the piano for the first time. Oh, and not to kick the front-door, push the living room furniture, throw your plate of spaghetti on the floor and start having tantrums at every meal. I did that too. When you were small, I showed you how to eat food with a knife and fork. I took you on long walks through the woods and showed you the constellations. If you were naughty, I got cross with you and I screamed and swore at you, but I loved you. Oh and of course I wrote all those little books for you."

The manuscript is not yet complete. Starmer needs a final pen stroke, the vital one that sets his passion in motion and secures the greatest triumph for the pro-remain campaign. The chapter ends, "This is how I should have ended it. On 29 March, I should have announced I was standing for parliament. There would have been boos and jeers, but there would have been cheers too. I would have won because I would have stood for Britain and not just for Brussels. At last we would have had a voice at Westminster. You might not have liked me and you might have thrown tomatoes at me. But I think you would have liked to have a say in choosing our MPs. I think that would have been a better way for me to go."

This is not the kind of suicide note you would expect to read from a man who has just staged a stunning coup.

# ¿ Jun 17, 2022 12:00

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

https://twitter.com/GdnSaturday/status/1537721856718819328

This guy is far more interesting and good-humoured than Starmer, but you already knew that

# ¿ Jun 17, 2022 12:11

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

The North starts wherever you stop seeing motorway signs directing you to THE NORTH

# ¿ Jun 18, 2022 12:21

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

OwlFancier posted:

Surely it starts when you see signs directing you to THE SOUTH

but then you need to have a second person in the car craning their neck to see the signs on the southbound carriageway

# ¿ Jun 18, 2022 21:36

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

bloody woke builders, even the ones that do have a fried breakfast eat wholegrain toast and use sweetener in their tea! it�s absolute madness, I had a fella round the other day and when he bent over I could barely see any of his asscrack! what is the world coming to?

# ¿ Jun 20, 2022 00:10

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

smellmycheese posted:

Spicy Kieth-spiracy here�.

https://twitter.com/bojack90s/status/1538902459015471106

https://twitter.com/trendylefty/status/1538608255534088193

The fakes are so low�effort it's almost concerning. Is Labour HQ reduced to doctoring propaganda shots with MS Paint?

# ¿ Jun 20, 2022 18:38

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

I�m completely exhausted after one plum job, can�t imagine getting two in a row

# ¿ Jun 21, 2022 01:16

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

The Perfect Element posted:

I love how Tories point at the country burning down around them, after more than a decade of them being in charge, and just say, 'this is what things would look like under Labour!'

Like, surely even their most ardent supporters can't be blind to the fact that, actually, Labour aren't in charge, and haven't been for ages?

It's very revealing of how they and their supporters think of politics, IMO. Sensible, Centrist Politics� doesn't make changes in people's lives or cause events to happen; it exists primarily to create and protect the ability of business to implement changes to society according to the demands of the market. Therefore, the strikes aren't the result of political policy, since the sensible Tories have been in power for over a decade and sensible politics doesn't cause things to happen. The strikes are just a business dispute and so the only thing to do politically is to allow the business and its workers to come to an agreement, and to point out that a radical government like Labour changing society directly would upset the market and cause more things like this to happen!

# ¿ Jun 21, 2022 14:00

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

I believe this outlook is also why Starmer is so eager to have no opinions or goals at all. The perfect centrist politician is one who does at little interfering as possible so the wondrous free market can get on with building and changing society according to the perfectly democratic whims of the free market.

# ¿ Jun 21, 2022 14:05

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

Bobby Deluxe posted:

https://twitter.com/BNNBreaking/status/1539265778595565568?t=ec0Wtd-I6p1gSNHcOwzCOw&s=19

Sorry, have I fallen through a time portal? Didn't this happen weeks ago, hence causing me to read many, many updates on how he's been trying to wriggle out of the purchase since then with increasingly desperate claims about the number of bots?

# ¿ Jun 21, 2022 20:52

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

can�t wait for Boris to reach deep into his bag of tricks and bring out another dead cat for everyone to enjoy

# ¿ Jun 22, 2022 00:46

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

They�ll call up ex-bosses or other people Mick Lynch has upset by being a tough negotiator and put together a takedown smear accusing him of being an unrepentant bully. Then all the journos will pile on accusing him of being disrespectful and of bullying them when he does a �that�s ridiculous� comeback in an interview.

�Why can�t you just answer the question Mr Lynch? Why do you feel the need to denigrate me for doing my job?�

# ¿ Jun 23, 2022 08:39

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

Bobby Deluxe posted:

https://twitter.com/zinovievletter/status/1539896477438320641?t=tWpUJL_HX625nKTPNrDg7A&s=19

Some old favourites in this thread.

Almost every one of these was an experience of "huh, haven't heard anything from that oval office in a while" and then you realise it doesn't even matter because there's an endless parade of shiny new cunts to take their place :smith:

# ¿ Jun 23, 2022 19:25

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# ¿ May 10, 2024 15:35

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

Tesseraction posted:

Well I abhor violence and cruelty to animals, I have to admire the tenacity https://twitter.com/DailyMirror/status/1540032690111406080

The phrase �punched to death� really doesn�t feel like it should apply to a single punch, even if technically true. Reckon you need a solid 30�60 seconds of furiously deranged punching for that description.

# ¿ Jun 23, 2022 21:48

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT Summer 2022 - The Pipes, The Pipes Are Empty

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