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So yet another dinosaur movie has come out and the makers are clearly running out of ideas as to how to explain why humans never learn their lesson regarding dinosaurs. So now dinosaurs have escaped into the wide world and causing chaos. T-Rexes tearing up cities and whatnot. Which is funny because I figure that humans should actually have an easier time killing off the larger dinosaurs. They're easier targets to shoot, they can't hide anywhere, they breed slowly, and they have sensitive feeding habits. It's the smaller dinosaurs that are likely to linger, becoming perpetual pests. Whales, elephants, and lions are endangered and need legal protection to survive humans, but rats and crows and raccoons are everywhere despite our intense desire to exterminate them.
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Jun 27, 2022 21:28
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| # ? Apr 29, 2024 11:05 |
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1 guy can tranq a fully grown T-rex in the 2nd movie. is the premise of this movie really "hOw Do wE sTop dInOsAur?!"
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Jun 27, 2022 23:07
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locusts.
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Jun 27, 2022 23:25
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movie that accomplishes nothing and leaves the world in the same place it was at the end of the last atrocious movie, complete with "dinosaurs among us" montage. so many new and old characters together by the end the shots with them all reacting to big cgi blobs are ridiculously crowded messes. utter execrable trash from the worst living director
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Jun 28, 2022 09:17
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R. Guyovich posted:movie that accomplishes nothing and leaves the world in the same place it was at the end of the last atrocious movie, complete with "dinosaurs among us" montage. so many new and old characters together by the end the shots with them all reacting to big cgi blobs are ridiculously crowded messes. utter execrable trash from the worst living director and still it will somehow make almost a billion dollars. i am genuinely kind of wondering how that happens. I suppose it is partially because people want to see new big blockbuster stuff.
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Jun 28, 2022 09:36
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This thread: I was like, did they get the original? Cameron Thor? No -- he's a loving pedophile in jail.
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Jun 28, 2022 18:17
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Kurzon posted:So now dinosaurs have escaped into the wide world and causing chaos. T-Rexes tearing up cities and whatnot. Which is funny because I figure that humans should actually have an easier time killing off the larger dinosaurs. They're easier targets to shoot, they can't hide anywhere, they breed slowly, and they have sensitive feeding habits. It's the smaller dinosaurs that are likely to linger, becoming perpetual pests. Whales, elephants, and lions are endangered and need legal protection to survive humans, but rats and crows and raccoons are everywhere despite our intense desire to exterminate them. An elephant pregnancy lasts two years. At the end, you get one elephant. Correspondingly, if something fucks up an elephant population unexpectedly, it takes a long time to bounce back. A titanosaur sauropod egg clutch can contain dozens of eggs. And there's nothing in theory stopping a clutch every year, or even multiple annual clutches. The reason for the disparity in numbers here is than an egg can only be so large before the thickness of shell needed prevents the embryo from breathing and suffocates it. Correspondingly, once you're laying an egg the size of about, oh, a soccer ballish, there's only one way to scale your reproduction: quantity. Which, when you're a very large dinosaur, you can house quite comfortably without a huge impact on your body. This creates a population that recovers much faster from random bad luck, which means that large dinosaurs in general are much 'safer' from extinction than corresponding large mammals, and also helps explain why dinosaurs were not only much more likely to grow to large sizes but also had an extremely successful bodyplan (sauropods) that regularly produced species as large as an entire herd of the largest currently living land mammal. Mind you, I have no argument that they'd make poor pest species though because yes, guns, but even very large dinosaur species could theoretically become 'nuisances' with successful reproduction, which could fill the countryside with wandering batches of immature animals that could still be bigger than cows. As for the movie itself, well I almost admire this franchise's dedication to taking every possible loose end or maybe-plot-point from itself across both novels and films and executing them as stupidly, incompetently, and boringly as possible, but I don't need to see it happening. And I only saw the second JW film because one of you sonuvabitches dared me.
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Jun 28, 2022 20:21
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I have liked and defended every Jurassic Park sequel. Until now. Why would you make a Jurassic Park film where barely anyone gets eaten by dinosaurs? Most deaths happen off-screen, I think you only see one. The film introduces a preposterous James Bond villian and she doesn't even get eaten! Every dinosaur sequence feels flattened out with no feel for tension and excitement. No rise and falls in excitement in the sequences, just a consistent level of almost cinematic white noise. Barely any memorable dinosaurs, the Gigantosaurus has 0 personality and screen presence. Why bring back the legacy cast and then have them faff about doing nothing of consequence for an hour and a half? Why not attempt to give the World cast some form of conceivable character dynamic so we can get invested in their story? Dr. Wu had some miraculous character change off-screen, would have been interesting to see. I don't even mind the locusts idea, exploring the wider ramifications of genetic engineering is imo a good idea, except the film explores none of it despite somehow also spending all its time on the locusts. It's a write off.
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Jun 29, 2022 08:23
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I believe that Tom Cardy said it best regarding the past, current, and future direction of this franchise: https://youtu.be/JVho5fU3lwc
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Jun 30, 2022 00:53
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I have provided a scientific chart made by one Dr. David Hone that now tabulates and analyzes all six films: https://twitter.com/Dave_Hone/status/1538212816989061121?s=20&t=HS_iWs-qgBoMSnwe2xbRwA Personally, I think there's a strong correlation between the 'militarize the dinosaurs' row and Film Problems. Breetai posted:I believe that Tom Cardy said it best regarding the past, current, and future direction of this franchise: Meanwhile, and this is where I pulled Hone's analysis from, Mark Witton asks the question: is 'let's cram in every animal we can doing sicc action scenes without asking if any of this has a purpose in the film' perhaps a bad idea? http://markwitton-com.blogspot.com/2022/06/can-dinosaur-movies-have-too-many.html
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Jun 30, 2022 13:43
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Thanks for the biology lesson. I learned something.
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Jul 1, 2022 12:19
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Thanks, glad to hear it was enjoyable. If you want much better and infinitely more direct sources of modern dinosaur information AND lovely art, go check out paleontologist and paleoartist mark witton's blog, which I cited above criticizing the awful movie that is the subject of this thread.
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Jul 1, 2022 13:50
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Well good to know the only thing that interests me in this movie is not a big part of the movie. Guess I'll be skipping it.
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Jul 1, 2022 15:53
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The first half was enjoyable to laugh at, the last 60 minutes had me nodding off. This was one of the poorest major films I've seen in ages. The audience clapped when it ended...
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Jul 1, 2022 16:41
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I'm never going to see this loving movie. I made it about thirty seconds into the trailer. It looks so stupid, just insultingly stupid in every way. But maybe someone who has seen it can explain something to me that seems to be the stupidest of all: What happened to guns to let dinosaurs take over the world? I mean, yeah, a T-Rex is dangerous, but in the US once it gets near a population center some A-10s are coming on station to feed that fucker Mavericks and 2000-lb LGBs. So how do they take over the world? Do we just let them do it because we feel bad for them? Is there some "Can't hurt them because they are endangered" plot point thing, or a microbe that eats all guns, or something? Because "dinosaurs take over the world" is really just about the stupidest loving thing when the dumbest among us can buy a 30 round military rifle at the loving pawn shop for $200.
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Jul 1, 2022 17:34
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They don't take over the world. They are established as being a dangerous nuisance at most and most dinosaurs running amok in human society scenes are annoyingly brief. In the second act it transpires they've mostly been rounded up in a facility therefore defaulting the film back to status quo except in a valley, not an island. The global threat is due to locusts which are engineered to eat only crops that haven't been provided by an evil genetics company. Thus risking a global famine. That's not a terrible idea for an inciting incident, but it stubbornly goes nowhere.
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Jul 1, 2022 17:56
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Does the human cloning thing for jw2 come up at all?
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Jul 1, 2022 17:57
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MacheteZombie posted:Does the human cloning thing for jw2 come up at all? Yea it's a major plot point, to the movies detriment. Anyway I will say that Goldblum is actually in it quite a bit, doing Goldblum things. So I was at least entertained during those scenes.
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Jul 1, 2022 18:01
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The Topps trading cards "Dinosaurs Attack" from the 90s create a more compelling, nuanced take on the dinosaurs-invade-society genre than this film.
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Jul 1, 2022 18:34
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Karloff posted:The global threat is due to locusts which are engineered to eat only crops that haven't been provided by an evil genetics company. Thus risking a global famine. That's not a terrible idea for an inciting incident, but it stubbornly goes nowhere. That sounds like promising social commentary if it wasn't put in the middle of the dumb dinos do dumb poo poo movie
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Jul 1, 2022 19:32
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One of the worst movies I've ever seen, if only because they completely waste an interesting premise. Dinosaurs loose in the world? You could have so many fun scenes, so many crazy setpieces. Instead they just ignore that, except for like 2 scenes, and put the majority of the dinosaur action in a hidden mountain facility that's basically just another variation of the island in the very first Jurassic Park. There are also some really bizarre Indiana Jones and Star Wars segments. Are these just because the director wants to prove he could direct those movies, too? Who knows. The Star Wars stuff is the weirdest to me. You get guys with little alien-looking dinos hanging on their shoulders, dinosaurs fighting, a baby alien that looks like he'd fit in on Tatooine. It instantly took me out of the movie, it just did not fit at all. The only reason to watch this movie is to enjoy the practical effects which, to be fair, are generally really good. But it's not worth watching an entire movie of dull characters, nonsensical plot twists, and references to the first movie that just instantly take you out of the film. That Barbasol can that couldn't possibly have been found after it got covered in mud and then the island blew up in the last movie? Guess what? It's back. And the main villain is going to say a line that means absolutely nothing within the context of the film, but it's from the first movie, so you'll love it, right?
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Jul 1, 2022 19:37
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Karloff posted:The global threat is due to locusts which are engineered to eat only crops that haven't been provided by an evil genetics company. A Fancy Hat posted:a baby alien that looks like he'd fit in on Tatooine. what in the gently caress is happening to this series?
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Jul 1, 2022 20:22
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A Fancy Hat posted:One of the worst movies I've ever seen, if only because they completely waste an interesting premise. the director got fired from a star wars movie so there's plenty of personal acrimony that would motivate the inclusion of those elements though it says a lot about how much of a nothing this movie is i don't even remember the alien poo poo
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Jul 2, 2022 05:26
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I did have a big smile while Chris Pratt was having a Bourne Identity style chase scene through Euro apartments and then on motorcycle against evil military raptors. It went beyond stupid and into being entertaining, IMO.
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Jul 3, 2022 03:32
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I don't know if it's just the Wikipedia plot summary being hard to follow, but does the movie actually feature an Old Testament style plague that's only stopped by the power of Abstinence, and giving birth to your own clone instead of doing that icky sex stuff?
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Jul 3, 2022 08:35
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No this is the one where internal affairs were setting them up the entire time
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Jul 3, 2022 14:57
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I feel like the bazaar scene was the most cool and unique part of the movie, and was bummed when we shifted from a world colored by dinosaurs to Yet Another loving Island Research Facility.
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Jul 4, 2022 05:19
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This is one of those movies that is absolutely a video game movie and feels like some weird knockoff of Resident Evil 6. Also 90% of the script is video game cutscene script. Like just scene after scene of "character delivers some new information," another character responds with "Whaat?!" and then they go to/do whatever information the character said. Like it borders on self parody how many "Whaat?!"s are uttered in this movie.Robot Style posted:I don't know if it's just the Wikipedia plot summary being hard to follow, but does the movie actually feature an Old Testament style plague that's only stopped by the power of Abstinence, and giving birth to your own clone instead of doing that icky sex stuff? It can definitely be read that way, we learn that Maisie (clone girl from the previous movie that Hammond's brother made) was actually made by an adult brilliant scientist version of her who had an unnamed rare genetic disorder and wanted to have a kid very badly but didn't want to pass down her genetic disorder. Also her genetics are the key to stopping a literal plague of locusts that was designed by the evil company, BIOSYN. There's also this scene where Sam Neil and Laura Dern are wearing like decontamination outfits but with regular old surgal/N95 style masks because they're in the PLAGUE LOCUST BREEDING ROOM and at one point they just, like, taken them off? It was shot like they were repulsed at having to wear masks and like Laura Dern throws her away in disgust as they leave the area.  Carwash oval office posted:I did have a big smile while Chris Pratt was having a Bourne Identity style chase scene through Euro apartments and then on motorcycle against evil military raptors. It went beyond stupid and into being entertaining, IMO. A Fancy Hat posted:One of the worst movies I've ever seen, if only because they completely waste an interesting premise. I can't emphasize enough how much every plot beat and the general progression of this movie is like a kid-friendly version of Resident Evil 6 in so many ways, even the vehicle chase feels like a game cutscene with QTEs instead of a single coherent chase scene. Also like, this movie opens up with Chris Pratt/Bryce Dallas Howard/the clone kid living in an extremely isolated cold snowy environment with a bunch of dinosaurs. And I know irl there were some dinosaurs that were cool (heh) in colder environments but this is like brontosaurs and Blue the raptor and poo poo. Acting-wise the girl who plays Maisie and BD Wong were pretty good, Sam Neil and Laura Dern and Jeff Goldblum were fun though the former had a lot of hilariously half-baked dialogue to struggle through. Everyone else was on some degree of "fine" to "actively not giving a poo poo". A lot of the effects were pretty good but also a large chunk of the dino action is either in these very monochromatic or very dark environs. I can confidently add this to the list of flicks that suck rear end, but would have at least been fun if they were rated R. This movie introduces a newly designed dinosaur called atrociraptors. They way they work is you point a special laser site at someone, and they lock onto that person's scent and chase them down to kill them forever. Like they realized in real time while filming like, oops, how do we accidentally wrote our lengthy raptor chasing our heroes scene in a dense urban environment. Like I wish this movie was directed by Antonio Margheriti or such with like half the budget, because everything else about is absolutely dumb as poo poo. There's a brief moment where the head of the evil dino smuggling operations, attacks Bryce Dallas Howard, and there's this part where she slashes at her with a blade a couple of times. It's this POV shot meant to be menacing of her getting in your face and slashing at you. It is incredibly unintentionally hilarious because she's clearly, like still five or six feet away from Bryce Dallas Howard at this point. Very video game enemy again. The Bee posted:I feel like the bazaar scene was the most cool and unique part of the movie, and was bummed when we shifted from a world colored by dinosaurs to Yet Another loving Island Research Facility. Same, every time the movie kind of sort of began to go into the territory of "dinosaurs live alongside modern humanity" there's a chase scene away from that entire aspect of the story. Like there's dinosaur action in the movie (and I did like that they even had some feathered dinosaurs) but the movie is absolutely 100% not about dinosaurs, dinosaurs are just a side thing/dangerous obstacle in the way of the plague locust/clone/etc. plot. An impressive feat.
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Jul 12, 2022 14:24
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Neo Rasa posted:[...]the movie is absolutely 100% not about dinosaurs, dinosaurs are just a side thing/dangerous obstacle in the way of the plague locust/clone/etc. plot. An impressive feat.[...]
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Jul 12, 2022 17:01
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I absolutely loved this movie. Fallen Kingdom was the perfect stupid movie mashing together a disaster movie, stealth video game and some other stuff into one package. In the end it leaves you with a clear tease: What if dinosaurs co-existed with man? And so we get this movie which instead of focusing on that instead transports us to a dinosaur theme park where things begin to go wrong and manages to be more of a remake of Jurassic Park than the original Jurassic World was. Brilliant.
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Jul 12, 2022 18:39
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IhOPdyoezAs This looks like a theme park animatronic
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Jul 12, 2022 20:42
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...I was actually kinda scared of that scene  But probably cause it is like a little scare ride. Plus they made Dimetrodon's so mean.
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Jul 12, 2022 20:53
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First paleozoic clone in the series. If you want to celebrate that sort of thing there's a thread for that.
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Jul 12, 2022 21:14
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Jesus loving christ I thought the pteranodons and the loving elasmosaur were bad enough
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Jul 13, 2022 00:21
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CelticPredator posted:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IhOPdyoezAs Alien reference?
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Jul 13, 2022 02:36
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Idk I haven’t seen the movie. I just saw that clip and it looked really janky. The thing barely moves.
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Jul 13, 2022 02:49
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CelticPredator posted:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IhOPdyoezAs It's a bit unfair to judge it by a low res, blown out YouTube clip. It looks even worse in the actual movie.
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Jul 13, 2022 03:35
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I did like how the Dimetrodon roars sounded vaguely human-like (since they're distantly related to us).
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Jul 13, 2022 11:59
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Kaiju Cage Match posted:I did like how the Dimetrodon roars sounded vaguely human-like (since they're distantly related to us). Oh yeah aren't dimetrodons not even technically dinosaurs/predate a lot of them by some time?
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Jul 13, 2022 12:44
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| # ? Apr 29, 2024 11:05 |
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SpiritOfLenin posted:and still it will somehow make almost a billion dollars. Probably because it was released in the wake of Top Gun Maverick and it energized movie going audiences to come back and want to watch something new. It’s like when Avatar came out and the first 3D movies after that became legit hits just by default.
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Jul 13, 2022 13:23
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