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Kaiser Schnitzel

Schnitzel mit uns


s-tier sandwiches:
muffaletta
french dip
cuban
gyro
roast beef po-boy (with lots of gravy stuff)

a-tier sandwiches:
roast turkey
toasted ham and swiss with lots of mustard

b tier:
roast beef poboy without lots of gravy
sandwiches too much crap on them
roast beef an provolone (move to a tier if lots of mayo)

f tier:
bologna

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Kaiser Schnitzel

Schnitzel mit uns


forgot cheesesteak, cheesesteak is def. s-tier


https://i.imgur.com/R8ctked.mp4
ty Manifisto for this wonderful sig!


Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs
agree w/ everything so far but u forgot about the humble peeber AKA pb&j for all u muggles out there

B tier at best but still a staple





spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs
also we can't forget about the bahn mi wife





spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs
turkey club can be s tier so long as dijon is present





spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

barnold


what do u do when yuo're born to play fps? guess there's nothing left to do but play fps. boom headshot
north shore roast beef also deserves to be s-tier


Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs

barnold posted:

north shore roast beef also deserves to be s-tier

north shore?? of what





spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs
massachusetts probably. they have the meats





spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs
chicken philly w/ pepperoncinis and bacon is easily S tier

love me a chkn philly :henget:





spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs
popeye's blackened chicken po boy w/ pickles and mayo was off the chain but is no longer on their menu sadly :rip:

:negative:





spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

Twenty Four


S tier:
Steak
Salami
Sausage

A Tier:
Albacore tuna
Avocado
Apple slices and peanut butter, hold the bread

B Tier:
Bologna
Banana and peanut butter
Bahn Mi

C Tier:
Chicken salad
Cheese (grilled)
Corn on the cob, hold the cob

F Tier:
Fruit
Food (any)
Farts (when 2 people standing on either side of you fart at the same time making you a fart sandwich)

That's how this works right, it's an alphabetizing thing? I've never understood why "S tier" is the best. Is it for super? Or are words that start with the letter "S" just inherently the best and make the best sandwiches?

google THIS

s-tier:
corned beef Reuben
Italian sub with hot peppers
beef on weck

a-tier:
fried bologna
grilled cheese with piping hot tomato soup for dipping
grilled PB&J
pastrami Reuben
Italian sub with olives
roast beef with horseradish

b-tier:
grilled cheese without tomato soup
BLT
Italian sub with marinara sauce
normal PB&J

c-tier:
Italian sub with mayo
any sandwich that has french fries on it for no good reason

f-tier:
turkey "Reuben"
PB&J that sat in your lunch bag too long and didn't have peanut butter on both sides so the jelly soaked into one of the bread slices
roast beef with "creamy" horseradish

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs

google THIS posted:

s-tier:
corned beef Reuben
Italian sub with hot peppers
beef on weck

a-tier:
fried bologna
grilled cheese with piping hot tomato soup for dipping
grilled PB&J
pastrami Reuben
Italian sub with olives
roast beef with horseradish

b-tier:
grilled cheese without tomato soup
BLT
Italian sub with marinara sauce
normal PB&J

c-tier:
Italian sub with mayo
any sandwich that has french fries on it for no good reason

f-tier:
turkey "Reuben"
PB&J that sat in your lunch bag too long and didn't have peanut butter on both sides so the jelly soaked into one of the bread slices
roast beef with "creamy" horseradish

what the h*ck is weck. sounds wack





spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs
this thread begs the age old question, is a burg a sandwich





spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

Kaiser Schnitzel

Schnitzel mit uns


Areola Grande posted:

this thread begs the age old question, is a burg a sandwich
Yes, technically, but for the purposes of this thread, no, a burg is not in the category of sandwiches under consideration


https://i.imgur.com/R8ctked.mp4
ty Manifisto for this wonderful sig!


Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs

Kaiser Schnitzel posted:

Yes, technically, but for the purposes of this thread, no, a burg is not in the category of sandwiches under consideration

ok whew. i was not ready to contend with all that





spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

barnold


what do u do when yuo're born to play fps? guess there's nothing left to do but play fps. boom headshot

Areola Grande posted:

massachusetts probably. they have the meats

thats right


Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs

barnold posted:

thats right



would





spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

Manifisto


s tier: pan bagnat (fancy french tuna sandwich that is essentially a nicoise salad on a roll and it's amazing)

other tuna sandwiches are on lesser tiers

Areola Grande posted:

also we can't forget about the bahn mi wife

hands off friend she's taken!!


ty nesamdoom!

Manifisto


Areola Grande posted:

this thread begs the age old question, is a burg a sandwich

according to the folks at louis' lunch in new haven, said by some (well, louis' lunch says it anyway) to be the birthplace of the hamburger sandwich, it most certainly is

louis' lunch serves its hamburger sandwiches on toasted bread, by the way, and one does not order a "cheeseburger" there, one orders a "hamburger with cheese." actually there is supposedly a more complicated vernacular but in any event don't say "cheeseburger" unless you want to be shown the door, without your hamburger sandwich.


ty nesamdoom!

Ass-penny

you forgot my BAHN MI BAY BEE

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs

Manifisto posted:

according to the folks at louis' lunch in new haven, said by some (well, louis' lunch says it anyway) to be the birthplace of the hamburger sandwich, it most certainly is

louis' lunch serves its hamburger sandwiches on toasted bread, by the way, and one does not order a "cheeseburger" there, one orders a "hamburger with cheese." actually there is supposedly a more complicated vernacular but in any event don't say "cheeseburger" unless you want to be shown the door, without your hamburger sandwich.

cheeseburger sandwich is like saying PIN number or ATM machine or police cops or the butt rear end





spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

Kaiser Schnitzel

Schnitzel mit uns


Manifisto posted:

according to the folks at louis' lunch in new haven, said by some (well, louis' lunch says it anyway) to be the birthplace of the hamburger sandwich, it most certainly is

louis' lunch serves its hamburger sandwiches on toasted bread, by the way, and one does not order a "cheeseburger" there, one orders a "hamburger with cheese." actually there is supposedly a more complicated vernacular but in any event don't say "cheeseburger" unless you want to be shown the door, without your hamburger sandwich.

I would say that a Louis’ lunch hamburger sandwich does count as a sandwich more than a burger, and it is a bad sandwich

F tier:
Louis lunch hamburger sandwich


https://i.imgur.com/R8ctked.mp4
ty Manifisto for this wonderful sig!


your friend sk

(ヤイケス!)


Twenty Four posted:

That's how this works right, it's an alphabetizing thing? I've never understood why "S tier" is the best. Is it for super? Or are words that start with the letter "S" just inherently the best and make the best sandwiches?

imagine a sandwich with one long piece of bread folded into an S though. like an incestuous club sandwich

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs

Twenty Four posted:

That's how this works right, it's an alphabetizing thing? I've never understood why "S tier" is the best. Is it for super? Or are words that start with the letter "S" just inherently the best and make the best sandwiches?

the S stands for Schlotzkys





spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

Manifisto


Kaiser Schnitzel posted:

I would say that a Louis’ lunch hamburger sandwich does count as a sandwich more than a burger, and it is a bad sandwich

F tier:
Louis lunch hamburger sandwich

them's fighting words!

to someone I imagine

seriously though I have tried the hamburger sandwich there years ago and it was pretty good imo, so perhaps my tastes are just f tier tastes


ty nesamdoom!

Kaiser Schnitzel

Schnitzel mit uns


Manifisto posted:

them's fighting words!

to someone I imagine

seriously though I have tried the hamburger sandwich there years ago and it was pretty good imo, so perhaps my tastes are just f tier tastes

i remember it having a weird texture and tasting a little like coal smoke. it was probably fine but my foodie brother had really talked it up and it was consequently very disappointing.

E: some food nerd said this and i think it about sums it up: "If you say it can be on toast, you're essentially redefining the hamburger out of existence. The hamburger as the world knows it means a sandwich of ground beef on a bun." which is why a lois' lunch 'hamburger' can be on a sandwich tier list, because it's on toast.

Kaiser Schnitzel fucked around with this message at 22:12 on Jul 1, 2022


https://i.imgur.com/R8ctked.mp4
ty Manifisto for this wonderful sig!


Twenty Four


your friend sk posted:

imagine a sandwich with one long piece of bread folded into an S though. like an incestuous club sandwich

Sandwich starts with "S" so this checks out for S Tier

Areola Grande posted:

the S stands for Schlotzkys

There used to be one like 3 miles from my house and we used to go there for lunch back in high school but it closed down a long time ago soon after. The closest one I could think of is like 30 miles across town but I just looked it up and there's one like 10 miles away and that might be just within relm of a nostalgia trip sometime, especially if I happened to be at least part way in that direction. Original on sourdough was my go to and it was good, the bread had some real tasty zing to it along with whatever vinegar or oil stuff they put on it. I haven't had one in forever.

Kaiser Schnitzel

Schnitzel mit uns


patty melt is a sandwich i forgot about which is a solid B tier sandwich, a tier if you dont mind getting a little messy. It is not for the dainty, however


https://i.imgur.com/R8ctked.mp4
ty Manifisto for this wonderful sig!


your friend sk

(ヤイケス!)


Kaiser Schnitzel posted:

patty melt is a sandwich i forgot about which is a solid B tier sandwich, a tier if you dont mind getting a little messy. It is not for the dainty, however

I was trying to figure out whether a hamburger belongs in this tier list but I don't want to cause controversy

Kaiser Schnitzel

Schnitzel mit uns


your friend sk posted:

I was trying to figure out whether a hamburger belongs in this tier list but I don't want to cause controversy

IF ground meat patty AND on a bun, IS NOT sandwich.
IF ground meat patty AND betwixt two slices of bread, IS sandwich.

I will also arbitrarily make the following rulings: gyros are sandwiches while tacos are not. Sloppy Joes are not sandwiches for the purposes of this thread. I think I'm gonna draw the line at unsliced meats on buns and tortillas. Gyro is allowed because it is sliced meat, and on a yeast bread. Falafel gyro is allowed because it is a ground patty, and not on a bun or tortilla. Tacos are not allowed because they are both unsliced and on an inappropriate substrate. Same with sloppy joe.

Here's a helpful rhyme:
Pulled pork and on sliced bread? Rank it in this thread.
Pulled pork but on bun? Get out pal, you're done!
On a bun and nicely sliced? Rank it high, Jesus Christ!!

Hope that clarifies what should and should not be ranked itt.


https://i.imgur.com/R8ctked.mp4
ty Manifisto for this wonderful sig!


Kaiser Schnitzel

Schnitzel mit uns


all this reminds me of a good dad joke i heard recently:

How did the hamburger introduce his girlfriend to his parents?

Meat Patty


https://i.imgur.com/R8ctked.mp4
ty Manifisto for this wonderful sig!


Twenty Four


What if I took a full hamburger (not a sandwich), then put some sliced deli meat and cheeses on top and bottom, then enclosed it all with a couple slices of bread?

I don't think it would rank very high due to the excessive bread ratio, but it might count.

Manifisto


quick question, do large chicken pieces count as "unsliced meats"? because chicken sammies (often on buns and when fried often are whole breasts etc) are definitely sammies.


ty nesamdoom!

Kaiser Schnitzel

Schnitzel mit uns


Manifisto posted:

quick question, do large chicken pieces count as "unsliced meats"? because chicken sammies (often on buns and when fried often are whole breasts etc) are definitely sammies.
they are allowed because they are sliced off the chicken. They are neither ground patties nor loose shredded/ground meats.


Twenty Four posted:

What if I took a full hamburger (not a sandwich), then put some sliced deli meat and cheeses on top and bottom, then enclosed it all with a couple slices of bread?

I don't think it would rank very high due to the excessive bread ratio, but it might count.
Hmm this is complicated and I am really not sure if sandwich or if not sandwich. Either way you are correct that its a moot point because that would be a C or D tier sandwich tops


https://i.imgur.com/R8ctked.mp4
ty Manifisto for this wonderful sig!


Kaiser Schnitzel

Schnitzel mit uns


mods plz change thread title to 'official byob sandwich lawyering thread' (do not)


https://i.imgur.com/R8ctked.mp4
ty Manifisto for this wonderful sig!


Kaiser Schnitzel

Schnitzel mit uns


I think i could make a pretty decent sandwich bureaucrat tho if the congress would ever get off its rear end and establish a Department of Sandwiches at the cabinet level. Writing and interpreting sandwich regulations is my dream job.


https://i.imgur.com/R8ctked.mp4
ty Manifisto for this wonderful sig!


Manifisto


though kaiser seems like a pretty good title for a top sandwich bureaucrat, I wonder whether it conveys any implication of loyalty to the kaiser roll industry? everybody knows the big money in sandwich politics is often associated with the rolls or other breads. sandwich lobbyist is a very powerful job, thats the big bucks.


ty nesamdoom!

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs
speaking of east coast sandwiches I've always wanted 2 try a pork roll egg and cheese myself

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Manifisto


Areola Grande posted:

speaking of east coast sandwiches I've always wanted 2 try a pork roll egg and cheese myself

pork roll is pretty good never had one in a sammich but it sounds like a good idea

scrapple too probably, if we're talking about pennsylvania dutch type treats


ty nesamdoom!

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