|
Horrifying! Cuddled with snakelady who shed skin on my couch. Company refuses to acknowledge damage. Find out how to protect yourself.
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 20:12
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 5, 2024 09:51 |
|
|
I'm, Scaaaaling A-waaaay
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 20:13
|
|
|
Hey come on in. Yeah just move some of the piles of trash outta the way and you'll come to a soiled mattress on the floor, aka the "cuddle zone". If it smells like cat pee there should be some febreeze lying around
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 21:27
|
|
|
Mr. Meagles posted:Hey come on in. Yeah just move some of the piles of trash outta the way and you'll come to a soiled mattress on the floor, aka the "cuddle zone". If it smells like cat pee there should be some febreeze lying around *Helps self to a slice of Floor Pizza*
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 21:28
|
|
|
Definitely real people who have recently cuddled up via the app:
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 21:42
|
|
|
cuddle this
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 21:44
|
|
|
There is definetly a FPlus episode about this garbage. CUDDLE PARTY https://thefpl.us/episode/169
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 21:46
|
|
|
BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:Definitely real people who have recently cuddled up via the app: I aint cuddling with none of these bitches
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 21:51
|
|
|
BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:Definitely real people who have recently cuddled up via the app: "Latest" implies it's just rando of who joined most recently, and not curated in any way. That would mean more women than men, and that is obviously a lie.
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 21:56
|
|
|
Hiring local 300lb dudes to cuddle i dont have a bed and need mass underneath my body
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 22:01
|
|
|
Wizard Master
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 22:12
|
|
|
Captain Yossarian posted:Wizard Master hello my friend!!!
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 22:14
|
|
|
Sid Vicious posted:hello my friend!!! Hi Sid! How are you? How is everything going in Canada? 
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 22:21
|
|
|
holy poo poo these people charge like $80+/hr to cuddle
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 22:27
|
|
|
Cowman posted:holy poo poo these people charge like $80+/hr to cuddle Wait wait wait. Is this a paid service??? Because bigly lol if so. I was under the impression is was just "dating site, but let's pretend" and just matching individuals up. Is that not the case?
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 22:30
|
|
|
Apparently you can hire a professional cuddler on the site, if the regular people aren't up to par
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 22:38
|
|
|
Mooey Cow posted:Apparently you can hire a professional cuddler on the site, if the regular people aren't up to par I saw a dead body at a cuddle party once, no one else noticed that the person was dead or when they had died, i didnt want to cause a panic so i didnt say anything but when i tried to close my eyes all i could think about was the dead body lying in the middle of the softly undulating bodies cocooned about me in woolen blankets and heated epidermis, so all i could do was stare at the dead body as the whole heaving mass of human chrysalides sighed and hissed soft breaths that stank of sleep and contentment, at one point an arm even lazily snaked about the waist of the dead body, as though there was still life within it to mingle with. i knew that as eclosion rushed forth for all these human cocoons that the only thing that would hatch was fear and terror as they all stood up to see one left behind - the dead body, that nasty rear end mfin dead body in my cuddle party!!!!
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 22:44
|
|
|
That was me you jerk!! I was murdered and you could have caught the cuddle killer!
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 22:51
|
|
|
Probably been pointed out already but these guys are going to get sued into oblivion when it turns out 17% of cuddle buddies are rapists.
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 23:00
|
|
|
I'm just looking for someone to cuddle my dick
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 23:03
|
|
|
Alucard posted:I'm just looking for someone to cuddle my dick Every cuddle party some guy just has to say this. 
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2022 23:32
|
|
|
 Lol
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 00:22
|
|
|
I think my wife would be madder if I spent money on some cuddle bitch rather than a standard prostitute.
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 00:25
|
|
|
You should just get a job where you don't have to worry about money then
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 00:25
|
|
|
kntfkr posted:I think my wife would be madder if I spent money on some cuddle bitch rather than a standard prostitute. Fuckin same
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 00:34
|
|
|
Sophy Wackles posted:Every cuddle party some guy just has to say this. Some people just need daddy's cuddies
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 00:35
|
|
|
DreadUnknown posted:There is definetly a FPlus episode about this garbage. Oh my god, the cuddle manifesto they link to quote:It’s been my experience that women often get emotionally attached more quickly and easily than men, and tend to view kisses as signs of a man’s interest, whereas many men seem able to view kissing more casually.
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 00:43
|
|
|
Cuddling is easy just remember if you get a boner you can leave the room "clever" so they don’t see it. All you do is crawl away on all fours pretending to be a cat. You can even go as far as saying "meow" as you crawl around the corner to fix yourself
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 00:46
|
|
|
Thank God I'm hot enough that they would just laugh at that
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 00:47
|
|
|
Bad Purchase posted:i bite down on styrofoam everyday to condition myself I set it on fire and suck up the smoke with a straw
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 01:31
|
|
|
bird with big dick posted:Probably been pointed out already but these guys are going to get sued into oblivion when it turns out 17% of cuddle buddies are rapists. 16% and they’re legally protected
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 01:49
|
|
|
Meme Poker Party posted:Wait wait wait. Is this a paid service??? Because bigly lol if so. I was under the impression is was just "dating site, but let's pretend" and just matching individuals up. Is that not the case? 
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 01:50
|
|
|
im so lonley haha
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 01:53
|
|
|
Chinatown posted:im so lonley haha 1 hour, hundred bucks, no lowballs I know what I got
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 01:57
|
|
|
lol at $200 an hour when an hour of cocaine can be had for less than $200
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 02:10
|
|
|
drat dawg I picked the wrong career
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 02:11
|
|
|
you could be getting paid $1200 a day to live with somebody!
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 02:12
|
|
|
Durf posted:Cuddling is easy just remember if you get a boner you can leave the room "clever" so they don’t see it. I always smile when I think of the comic that some goon drew of that.
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 02:30
|
|
|
sigh i cant believe im still a virgin *meow*
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 02:34
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 5, 2024 09:51 |
|
|
I enjoyed the follow up of another goon stating that her boyfriend did the same thing except he pretended to be a chimpanzee instead.
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2022 02:35
|
|