1KYOB 2022: At some point Brady will retire, right .... right?

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Bjork Bjowlob: Feb 23, 2006; yes that's very hot and i'll deal with it in the morning

Welcome to the 2022 edition of 1KYOB!

One Thousand Yards or Bust (1KYOB) is a game that's all about getting as close as you can to 1000 yards each week, via assembling a team of active players from any and all teams in a way which (hopefully!) has their yardage add up to less than or equal to 1000 yards. More than 1000 yards, you bust and you go to the bottom of the rankings for the week. Think of it as somewhere between fantasy football and the casino game of 21! Each week of the regular season corresponds to a week of the 1KYOB season, and the first three weeks of the playoffs correspond to the 1KYOB playoffs. During the regular season I'll sum up everyone's weekly score to keep track of the rankings, which are used to determine the playoff seeding (and any playoff-specific benefits/advantages). Once seeded, the playoffs continue as a series of three strict elimination weeks with only the top 1/3 of the field progressing each week, ultimately leading to a single survivor.....the 1KYOB champion.

If you're a new player and you want to know more, then head down to the 'How do I play 1000 Yards or Bust' section below. If you're a 1KYOB veteran - welcome back! Head on to the next section.

Prizes!

Prizes for this year are still to be confirmed. Check back later!

Notes for returning players

Firstly - I acknowledge that scoring updates were not timely last season and that substantially affected the flow of the game from week to week. This season will be better.

Secondly, a quick reminder of the changes to the game that were made last season:

There will be only one thread this year - each week will continue on directly after the previous week is closed out. I'll add links to each week in the OP (or the second post).
The way that tokens are refreshed has been adjusted. Previously, to refresh all of your tokens you had to score a perfect 1000. However, in the last few years we've seen exactly zero 1000-yard scores, so it appears that this requirement is too hard to meet for it to have any reasonable impact on the game. Therefore, tokens will now refresh if your weekly score lands in the range [996 - 1000] inclusive i.e. a non-busting score that is exclusively greater than 995. The token refresh will apply to all token types, however note that you can only have one of any token at any one time - and as usual, all unused tokens expire at the end of the regular season.
The Substantial Minerals token returns, however note that both the bonus points for a top 10 or highest score for the week and the range of rankings where the bonus is received were changed last season. This is because we've had fewer players each season than the original seasons when these bonus points were defined, and since fewer players means less points available per week the impact of the Minerals bonus has become much more significant while also becoming easier to achieve. Reducing the Minerals bonus, making the bonus rankings scale with the number of players, and making it (slightly) easier to refresh your token stock if you bust a Minerals all help balance things out.

How do I play 1000 Yards or Bust?

Every week, a player submits a list of offensive players and lists whether they wish to count their passing, rushing, or receiving yards for that week's game. The goal is to get as close to 1000 total yards without going over. Only Rushing, Receiving, and Passing yards can be used. You don't necessarily have to use the player's native position's stats. Which allows for Matt Ryan's Rushing Yards or a running back's receiving yards. You can use a player more than once but you cannot use the same combination of player and yardage type more than once, e.g. you can list Cam Newton for both Passing and Rushing yards but you can't list Cam Newton for Passing yards twice. Also, please put the team of the player, which makes it easier for me to find. Please, for the sake of making results easier to calculate, use players' actual names instead of nicknames (no Megatron, Purple Jesus, RG3, etc.) and make sure that you spell them correctly.

Lists are formatted as such:

DEN - Peyton Manning - Passing Yards
MIN - Adrian Peterson - Rushing Yards
DET - Calvin Johnson - Receiving Yards
LSG#: PHI - Carson Wentz - Passing Yards (this is your MNF player i.e. LSG number, see below)

And so on. Obviously, players can only be added to a list before their respective games start, so if you wake up halfway through the 1pm games on Sunday and realize you haven't submitted a list yet, you can still cobble one together from the afternoon games and be fine. Once the game of the first player on your list to play starts, your list is FINAL for the week and cannot be edited. If you want to make changes to your list before the games start that's fine, but please alert me to that edit in a separate post. I'm going to copy down people's lists before each set of games start if I start feeling I have a reason to be suspicious. The objective, as of the game implies, is for the entirety of your list to get as close as possible to 1000 yards without going over.

But there's a twist: every list must have one, and only one, player from Monday Night Football included to be counted. The name for the mandatory MNF number has changed from season to season - last season it was immortalized as the Bilious Bucco Bruce Number (or BBB for short) in honour (barf) of yet another Tom Brady Super Bowl victory, but this season the MNF number will be called...

The Long Suffering Goofball or LSG for short

Two cities were cheering hard for a Stafford win, but only one had tears in their eyes

Make sure you use LSG instead of BBB in your entries.

Lists without a LSG Number will be disqualified from scoring for the week, and players that include multiple players from the MNF game will only have the one designated as the LSG Number counted for their score. But, a LSG Number is the only requirement for a valid score, so if you somehow miss getting an entry in by the end of Sunday, you can always pick the player you think will get the most yards on Monday Night and at least get on the scoring table for the week.

How does scoring work?

The highest score of the week without busting (unless they hit 1000 exactly, but we'll get to that later) is awarded points equal to the number of entries for that week. Each player following will be rewarded points sequentially, and busted players are added after all the players who did not bust have been counted. Busted players receive more points the fewer yards they were over 1000.

So, in a hypothetical week where 5 users submitted entries:

Player A: 1200 yards (1 point)
Player B: 995 yards (5 points)
Player C: 1005 yards (3 points)
Player D: 1050 yards (2 points)
Player E: 800 yards (4 points)

So as you can see, the easiest way to succeed in 1KYOB is to A) enter every week (even busting is better than earning no points at all), and B) not bust. Coming short by 200 yards will get you way more points than busting by even a single yard. Points are cumulative across the entire 17 week season, so keep playing even if you get off to a bad start! One or two bad weeks won't kill you in the long run.

Playoffs? PLAYOFFS?

Because the Super Bowl obviously only features two teams, the final week of 1KYOB is actually the conference championships. The top 27 regular season scorers get a playoff berth, and after each week of the playoffs the bottom two thirds of the field are eliminated. So 27 entrants in the Wild Card round becomes 9 in the divisional round, and then only 3 move on to the final round of the 1KYOB season.

So what happens if someone hits 1000?

Hitting 1000 exactly is extremely rare. Dozens of users submit lists to 1KYOB every week (with many many others doing so infrequently), and perfect scores still happen only once or twice a year, if at all. Therefore, a perfect score entitles you to a bonus of 100 points for that week. And, if you've managed to get a perfect score without getting any busts during the season up to that point, this bonus increases to 150 points. Your stock of tokens will be refreshed as well. So in short, it's really really good to hit 1000 and not constantly play conservatively out of fear of busting because it gives you a huge leg up in the season standings.

Hitting exactly 1000 sounds very unlikely! What happens if I just get really close?

It is true that perfect 1000s are extremely rare, so to liven things up a bit, if you score between 996 - 1000 inclusive then your stock of tokens will be refreshed. Note that the other effects described above will still only apply to perfect scores of 1000.

Tokens!

Tokens are back again this year. What's a token you ask? Good question:

Because 1KYOB is inherently a game about selecting offensive players, tokens were originally created to celebrate the superlative defenders of the NFL as well as introduce another strategic element to the game. Most tokens apply to your LSG Number player (others have special effects) but you can't cheat and edit them in if you're heading into Monday about to bust: if you haven't declared you're using a token before the first player on your list starts, you're SOL. Each token can only be used once per season unless otherwise noted.

To play a token please copy and paste the image as well as the name of the token after your LSG Number.

This year there are eight tokens, split into three different categories - Normal, Supplemental, and Special. Each player starts with one of each token. It is not possible to have more than one of any token. You can only use a max of one Normal token per week. You can use as many different Supplemental or Special tokens per week as you wish, provided that you still have them available to use! All tokens are refreshed for the following week if you score between 996 - 1000 for any particular week, and some tokens have special refresh rules in addition to this general rule. All unused tokens expire at the end of the regular season - use them or lose them!

NORMAL TOKENS

THE ONLY DONALD TOKEN