help me choose a NFL football team

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Hell Yeah: Dec 25, 2012

oh yeah, football, it's a game where you carry the ball in your HANDS??? give me a break with these fake sports. it's not a real sport, it's made up

# ? Sep 26, 2022 00:00

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# ? May 21, 2024 08:28

hot cocoa on the couch: Dec 8, 2009

Hell Yeah posted:

oh yeah, football, it's a game where you carry the ball in your HANDS??? give me a break with these fake sports. it's not a real sport, it's made up

nicely done goon sire! haha its handegg amirite! all my 5s for you!!!!!!

# ? Sep 26, 2022 00:02

Bad Purchase: Jun 17, 2019

actually in america we call our hands �feet�

# ? Sep 26, 2022 00:39

Nefarious 2.0: Apr 22, 2008; Offense is overrated anyway.

the main point of watching football is cracking your first beer at noon and not stopping until your alarm goes off and you have to go to work

# ? Sep 26, 2022 00:42

neato burrito: Aug 25, 2002; bitch better have my chex mix

Help me choose a XFL "football team"

# ? Sep 26, 2022 00:55

sure okay: Apr 7, 2006

You rube, you fool. It's now about who to root for, it's about who to root against.

The Browns have spent millions of real Earth dollars to hire a known rapist, and he currently isn't even allowed to play! (because of the rapes)

Even the Greenbay Packers, established "friendly good guy" team, has a fervent anti-vaxxer for their QB.

Research just about any team and you'll find plenty of reason to root for their demise (both on the field and in Minecraft).

# ? Sep 26, 2022 01:12

Womblemania: Sep 4, 2022; by Hand Knit

Pick the DETROIT LIONS

# ? Sep 26, 2022 01:15

Sophy Wackles: Dec 17, 2000; > access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.

Football�how pedestrian. Try watching a real sport like pro Starcraft.

# ? Sep 26, 2022 01:21

Alucard: Mar 11, 2002; Pillbug

Tampa Bay but only when they wear their creamsicle throwback gear

# ? Sep 26, 2022 01:21

RoastBeef: Jul 11, 2008

go birds

# ? Sep 26, 2022 01:24

Mega64: May 23, 2008; I took the octopath less travelered,

And it made one-eighth the difference.

Do what I did, watch random games for awhile, then start watching RedZone so you can watch many teams at once, and then end up picking the team geographically closest to you anyway. It's worked for me as my team has been good the past few seasons, though they suck now.

# ? Sep 26, 2022 01:43

Nefarious 2.0: Apr 22, 2008; Offense is overrated anyway.

keep in mind if you pick an out of market team ur gonna have to pony up for an nfl package to watch then every week, or find a bar to frequent

# ? Sep 26, 2022 01:52

SilvergunSuperman: Aug 7, 2010

Or not be a boob and have the pirating skills of a 6 year old

# ? Sep 26, 2022 01:54

Bad Purchase: Jun 17, 2019

here's an idea

get some solid lime green hats and shirts and take photos of yourself at parties or stadiums throughout the season

at the end of the season when the playoffs are over, it will be extremely easy to photoshop the logos and colors of the winning team onto your apparel

# ? Sep 26, 2022 01:56

Seth Pecksniff: May 27, 2004; can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.

rain dogs posted:

Watch some Lamar Jackson highlights and become a Ravens fan op

Lamar to the Lions book it

# ? Sep 26, 2022 01:57

Good soup!: Nov 2, 2010

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3K68mKnriTo

# ? Sep 26, 2022 01:57

Tnuctip: Sep 25, 2017

Womblemania posted:

Pick the DETROIT LIONS

Well I mean on thanksgiving yeah, otherwise ��.

# ? Sep 26, 2022 02:01

Haptical Sales Slut: Mar 15, 2010; Age 18 to 49

Womblemania posted:

Pick the DETROIT LIONS

No. I like the *holds beer up to mouth*
..Atlanta Falcons.

I�m assuming a show actually did that for real? I just know it from the Simpson�s

# ? Sep 26, 2022 02:02

Pennywise the Frown: May 10, 2010; Upset Trowel

Good soup! posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3K68mKnriTo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zOYus1BE7jk

# ? Sep 26, 2022 02:03

Blue Footed Booby: Oct 4, 2006; got those happy feet

Root for the Darkstar Dragons

# ? Sep 26, 2022 02:06

BUG JUG: Feb 17, 2005

Nuts and Gum posted:

No. I like the *holds beer up to mouth*
..Atlanta Falcons.

I’m assuming a show actually did that for real? I just know it from the Simpson’s

It's because they had to draw it before the championship games determined who went to the superb owl that year. Good thing they did because there was a huge upset of some loser team!

Speaking of the Minnesota vikings...be a fan of the vikings..you get to hate the packers and we are only another four or five super bowl losses away from finally winning it all!

# ? Sep 26, 2022 02:34

Centrist Dad: Nov 13, 2007; When I see your posting; College Slice

buglord posted:

as being a socdem in the US is a constant kick in the dick as it is, and i dont want to be losing on multiple fronts of my life.

Sorry, you enjoy being kicked in the dick. You are a Jets fan, embrace it.

# ? Sep 26, 2022 02:36

Nooner: Mar 26, 2011; AN A+ OPSTER (:

SilvergunSuperman posted:

Or not be a boob and have the pirating skills of a 6 year old

# ? Sep 26, 2022 02:49

dee eight: Dec 18, 2002; The Spirit
of Maynard

get a time machine and go to all the baltimore colts games and cheer for johnny u (the greatest football man of all time with the greatest football haircut of all time)

also voted 2 because why the hell not

# ? Sep 26, 2022 02:58

Nefarious 2.0: Apr 22, 2008; Offense is overrated anyway.

drat nooner just steal your wife's credit card and buy sunday ticket. I promise it's better than playing popup whackamole and reloading every 7 minutes when the stream freezes

# ? Sep 26, 2022 03:02

Alucard: Mar 11, 2002; Pillbug

Oyak posted:

Sorry, you enjoy being kicked in the dick. You are a Jets fan, embrace it.

I don't think that Brooklynites like the Jets, even ironically

# ? Sep 26, 2022 03:13

Nooner: Mar 26, 2011; AN A+ OPSTER (:

Nefarious 2.0 posted:

drat nooner just steal your wife's credit card and buy sunday ticket. I promise it's better than playing popup whackamole and reloading every 7 minutes when the stream freezes

Sorry didn't read too busy watching Jimmy G fumble like a dumdum .... for FREE :hehe:

# ? Sep 26, 2022 03:16

Modulo16: Feb 12, 2014; "Authorities say the phony Pope can be recognized by his high-top sneakers and incredibly foul mouth."

The Jacksonville Jaguars.

# ? Sep 26, 2022 03:35

cunningham: Jul 28, 2004

Join the Bills:

* Fans travel. You can always find a random Bills fan outside of Buffalo.
* The aforementioned Mafia. Our existence is pain, so we like to make others not feel quite so much pain. Like this: https://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/30738114/baltimore-ravens-lamar-jackson-shouts-bills-mafia-donating-360000-charity
* We are actually kinda good now.

Becoming a Packers fan now when you don't have immediate ties to Green Bay/Wisconsin puts you at risk of being tied to Aaron Rodgers and his bullshit, and you don't want to get tainted with that. The fact that we lost 4 straight Super Bowl losses - and not the fact that we went to four straight Super Bowls - forever taints our franchise, so you wouldn't get accused of jumping on a bandwagon like you would if you supported other teams.

# ? Sep 26, 2022 04:00

Nefarious 2.0: Apr 22, 2008; Offense is overrated anyway.

Nooner posted:

Sorry didn't read too busy watching Jimmy G fumble like a dumdum .... for FREE

ok congrats on pirating a free, over-the-air network broadcast

# ? Sep 26, 2022 04:12

Darth Brooks: Jan 15, 2005; I do not wear this mask to protect me. I wear it to protect you from me.

There will never be an NFL team with a stranger story than the Oorang Indians. Bonus; they haven't lost a game in close to a hundred years.

Something I wrote a long time ago posted:

I'm going to start the story of the Oorang Indians in the strangest place possible considering who they were and when & where they played. We're going to start in the White House. That Richard M. Nixon had the greatest presidential hard on for football is well known. The man famously told the coach of the Washington Redskins to run a reverse to a wide receiver during a playoff game. As much as Nixon loved football, the man that was President when he was Vice President could always one up him. He played football. He played football against Jim Thorpe.

Jim Thorpe was a half-breed in the truest meaning of the word back when they still used that term. His father was Irish / Sac and Fox, and his mother was French / Potawatomi. He did not have a happy childhood by any means. His twin brother died when he was nine, his mother died a couple of years later. As a troubled teen he bounced in and out of school until ending up in Carlisle. The Carlisle Indian School was founded to "de-indianize" Native Americans. The coach there recognized Jim's athletic talent and gave him an outlet for his aggression, football.

In 1912, Carlisle played Army. Pop Warner (Yes, THAT Pop Warner, he was Carlisle's coach) said �Your fathers and your grandfathers, are the ones who fought their fathers. These men playing against you today are soldiers. They are the Long Knives. You are Indians. Tonight, we will know if you are warriors.� The Middle Linebacker for Army was Dwight D. Eisenhower. The team also included George S. Patton and Omar Bradley. Eisenhower entered the game determined to break Thorpe's leg. Instead late in the game Ike and another player got hurt crashing into each other trying to tackle Thorpe and had to sit out the rest of the game. Carlisle won 27-6.

Eisenhower would later become the Supreme Commander of the Allied Forces in Europe; he had responsibility for planning and supervising the invasion of North Africa and D-Day. In 1951, he became the first supreme commander of NATO, and the 34th President of the United States. Thorpe became one of the faces of Professional Football. From 1920 to 1928 he played for six different teams. He coached for the Oorang Indians.

This is where the story gets weird. Oorang is not the name of a Native American tribe. It's not a city, county, state, association or athletic club. It was the name of a Dog Kennel. Walter Lingo owned the Oorang Kennel, specializing in the Airedale breed of dog. The "Indians" part of the name wasn't just a "tribute" like Cleveland Indians, Atlanta Braves and such. The roster really was made up entirely of Native Americans.

Walter Lingo wanted to promote his kennel and he decided the NFL was the way to do it. Thorpe and Lingo were drinking buddies and for whatever purposes they decided to have it made up entirely of Indians. Lingo traveled to Canton, Ohio and purchased an NFL franchise for $100.00.

Jim Thorpe served as a player-coach and recruited players for the team. In keeping with Lingo's wishes that franchise be an all-Indian team. Indians came from all over the United States traveled to LaRue to try out for the team. Many of the prospects were the same guys who played with Thorpe's back in 1912 at the Carlisle Indian School. Several had not played in years and were older than 40.

The club performed almost exclusively on the road, as a traveling team, where it could draw the biggest crowds and best advertise the dogs. The same dieticians and the same trainer who fed his Airedales and cared for their well-being, also tended to the Indian team members.

Walter Lingo's son, Bob, later reflected that the team practiced every day, depending on the workload at the dog kennel. However training for an NFL season was only a secondary mission for the players. They did everything at the dog kennels, from training the dogs to building crates to ship them in.

They held the first halftime show. Rather than retiring to the locker room at halftime, the team showed Lingo�s Airedales to the crowd. It was debatable, though, whether the Indians were there to play football or give Airedale exhibitions at halftime. In addition to the exhibitions with the dogs; the Indians, including Thorpe, participated in helping the Oorang Airedales perform tricks for the crowd. However, it was their halftime entertainment that made them such a huge attraction in the early 1920s. There were shooting exhibitions with the dogs retrieving the targets. There were Indian dances and tomahawk and knife-throwing demonstrations. Thorpe had a history of repeatedly drop kicking footballs through the uprights from midfield. Indians player, Nick Lassa (also called "Long-Time-Sleep") even wrestled a bear on occasion.

The players knew that Lingo's only goal was to advertise his Airedales and that winning football games wasn't important to him. Therefore the players spent a lot of their free time partying and drinking. They won 4 games and lost 16 over two seasons.

The Oorang Indians are also believed to have the highest percentage of Oklahomans on its roster than any other NFL squad before or since. Finally the club was also the first NFL team to have a regular training camp during their short existence. The "Home town" for Oorang was LaRue, Ohio, which has never had a population over a thousand. It is the smallest town to ever be the home of an NFL franchise

I really do feel like these guys got the short end of the stick and would love to see them included the next time throwbacks come in. If I were to ever travel back in time I'd buy this one and let them play some serious football.

# ? Sep 26, 2022 04:24

flubber nuts: Oct 5, 2005

foot ball

# ? Sep 26, 2022 04:26

Mister Speaker: May 8, 2007; WE WILL CONTROL
ALL THAT YOU SEE
AND HEAR

You look like a Raiders fan.

# ? Sep 26, 2022 04:33

Wendigee: Jul 19, 2004

Why do the KC chiefs have to wear McDonald's mustard and ketchup... Was there a deal like 80 years ago it have they always been those colors?

# ? Sep 26, 2022 04:36

Wendigee: Jul 19, 2004

Oh my.. lmao

Always been mustard and ketchup...

Edit: if anything wants to read the story lol
https://blog.logomyway.com/chiefs-logo/
They used to be the Dallas, Texas team.

Wendigee fucked around with this message at 04:40 on Sep 26, 2022

# ? Sep 26, 2022 04:38

Wifi Toilet: Oct 1, 2004; Toilet Rascal

Mister Speaker posted:

You look like a Raiders fan.

The correct answer is Packers tho' otherwise you're just giving more money to another billionaire.

# ? Sep 26, 2022 04:40

limp_cheese: Sep 10, 2007; Nothing to see here. Move along.

"Da Bears" are another interesting choice.

Pros:
Legacy Team
You'll have a permanent sense of hope that it will be a good season because their entire roster, including the coaches, is changed every 3 years or so

Cons:
They will be wrecked by the Packers 19 times out of 20, even if the Packers have had a garbage season. Its like a law at this point.
You'll have a permanent sense of dread that it will be a bad season because their entire roster, including the coaches, is changed every 3 years or so

You honestly could do a lot worse.

# ? Sep 26, 2022 04:48