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Idiot billionaire baby elon mask is about to complete his impulse purchase of the twitter. He’s promised to lay off 75% of the staff. If you were working at twitter, what pranks would you set up for the new boss, who supposedly starts friday? For example, you could move the CEO title to the bathroom door. Or you create his user ID to be emusk2 and tell him there was a previous e. musk at the company. Or you could wait until he buys the company and shut it all down and delete the servers and wipe all the backups and the source code.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 03:27 |
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# ? May 5, 2024 16:42 |
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I would lead him down the stairs, OP. We would go farhter and farther and deeper and deeper and all the time we'd be hearing the beat of a single drum. And finally after a lifetime of goind down we wold be all the way at the bottom. There's no drum tough. And no drummer. Just all encompassing blackness and then I would cackle like an old crone and he would know that there is no afterlife. no god. there is nothing now. oblivion. Nothing.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 03:31 |
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Literally A Person posted:I would lead him down the stairs, OP. We would go farhter and farther and deeper and deeper and all the time we'd be hearing the beat of a single drum. And finally after a lifetime of goind down we wold be all the way at the bottom. There's no drum tough. And no drummer. Just all encompassing blackness and then I would cackle like an old crone and he would know that there is no afterlife. no god. there is nothing now. oblivion. Nothing. I like it. But can there be a pool of Astro glide at the bottom so he can’t get back up?
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 03:36 |
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Literally A Person posted:I would lead him down the stairs, OP. We would go farhter and farther and deeper and deeper and all the time we'd be hearing the beat of a single drum. And finally after a lifetime of goind down we wold be all the way at the bottom. There's no drum tough. And no drummer. Just all encompassing blackness and then I would cackle like an old crone and he would know that there is no afterlife. no god. there is nothing now. oblivion. Nothing. This is why we can't keep good interns, you know.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 03:37 |
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The Management posted:I like it. But can there be a pool of Astro glide at the bottom so he can’t get back up? No. Maybe, but you have to pay for it.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 03:37 |
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Literally A Person posted:I would lead him down the stairs, OP. We would go farhter and farther and deeper and deeper and all the time we'd be hearing the beat of a single drum. And finally after a lifetime of goind down we wold be all the way at the bottom. There's no drum tough. And no drummer. Just all encompassing blackness and then I would cackle like an old crone and he would know that there is no afterlife. no god. there is nothing now. oblivion. Nothing. This, but there's a half-built brick wall at the bottom.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 03:38 |
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.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 03:38 |
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fart while walking by him or in the elevator with him
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 04:17 |
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Private Cumshoe posted:fart while walking by him or in the elevator with him I farted on the owner of the Pittsburgh Pirates and it felt pretty drat good.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 04:36 |
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I would simply saw off his shins whole he is sleeping and sew his feet to his knees, and then when he's awake and everyone is taller than him I'd make short people jokes at his expense OP
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 05:00 |
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Unplug his Tesla while it’s charging
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 05:36 |
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program the email server to automatically filter "elon" to "melon" on all messages
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 06:28 |
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Give yourself infinite health and they can't win.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 06:32 |
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Probably tweet goatse, but that's not against the new rules, like free speech man
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 06:33 |
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but being forced to buy twitter was the prank op
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 06:50 |
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the holy poopacy posted:program the email server to automatically filter "elon" to "melon" on all messages This but program twitter to do it
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 07:04 |
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“Guillotine Me” sticker on his back
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 12:16 |
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Is it too easy?
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 12:22 |
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Prank him with a tire iron.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 12:26 |
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Put a clear puck into the bottom of his coffee mug so it looks completely empty but overflows every time he uses the Keurig
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 12:29 |
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Force his Tesla auto drive to make a right turn into the parking garage, which sets the car on fire and kills him and all his passengers.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 12:40 |
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Tell him he just got a DM from Dril congratulating him on his purchase of Twitter and epic posting prowess except its just that pic of him and ghislaine instead
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 13:24 |
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give him a massage but don't jack him off at the end, he hates it when that happens!!
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 22:59 |
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poo poo on his desk OP its an alpha move and youll get promoted
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 23:00 |
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Vivisect him.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 23:04 |
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i would bring him a gift and say "hey elon, epic purchase dude, i got you something to welcome you as my new boss." then i hand him the gift, and he unwraps it and it's just a piece of paper saying "look up" and then he looks up and I just slap the poo poo out of him repeatedly until security drags me away screaming
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 23:08 |
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I would punch Him in THE TEETH and then Conscript Him to go and Fight in Ukraine
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 23:09 |
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Change his profile name from “@elonmusk” to “@somepedoguy”
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 23:16 |
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hide a real stinky poo poo in he desk drawer
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 23:18 |
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I would trigger some automated script to check when he recovers his password to change it again so when he has to login again he has to recover the email, and then setup a trigger in the help desk system to point his correspondence to dev bill so he can’t open tickets. Then I would create a GPO to put a photoshopped image of that photo of him where he’s super pale, and then I would randomly also lock his twitter account.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 23:24 |
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i dedicate months of my work to becoming a model employee in elon musks eyes. i dig up mountains of information on him and use it all during this time to work my way into becoming his personal assistant. then one monday morning in a meeting i just suddenly start slapping the absolute poo poo out of him in front of everyone. i slap and slap and slap until security drags me away screaming.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 23:29 |
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constantly badmouth south african apartheid rule around the water cooler
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 23:42 |
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Fill his desk with his internal organs.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 23:49 |
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Release three pigs into his office labelled 1, 2, and 4.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 23:53 |
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hang a few grimes posters in my office and conference rooms
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 23:54 |
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Call social services and tell them a r-rambunctious fella got loose.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 23:55 |
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Make it so he can only tweet something if he correctly identifies which from a grid of 16 faces are his own children.
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 23:56 |
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park my plugin hybrid in the spot meant for 100% electric vehicles and pretend it was an honest mistake
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# ? Oct 27, 2022 23:57 |
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Buy a Tesla and fill the trunk with gas by accident.
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# ? Oct 28, 2022 00:00 |
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# ? May 5, 2024 16:42 |
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always greet him in the hall with “heeeyyy, it’s ol’ musky” while doing finger gun or fist pump gestures even though he’s asked multiple times for me not to greet him that way
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# ? Oct 28, 2022 00:00 |