havent gotten angry about bean-in chili for a while

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Scrotum Modem: Sep 12, 2014

i'll put some beans into your chili, op

and by beans i mean the 2 "beans" in my fackin nutsack. heheheheee

# ? Nov 11, 2022 13:49

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# ? May 2, 2024 03:15

Poohs Packin: Jan 13, 2019

There are times when beanless chili is called for like previously stated. Detroit style Coney Island and Skyline chili for example.

However, these are constituents of a larger whole and you'd have to be a loving heathen to just eat a bowl of what is essentially ground offal and brown.

# ? Nov 11, 2022 13:51

AARD VARKMAN: May 17, 1993

Inexplicable Humblebrag posted:

the op makes chili by adding ketchup to raw mince and panfrying it for ten minutes

actually that's your recipe

# ? Nov 11, 2022 13:59

Riot Bimbo: Dec 28, 2006

ZeusCannon posted:

How does this work like meat and tofu chunks or fake tofu meat?

Legit curious because i never thought to put tofu in chili but now im intrigued

you just sizzle n slap some tofu in your chili

# ? Nov 11, 2022 14:27

Prof. Crocodile: Jun 27, 2020

have we gotten to the part where we argue about The People Who Invented Chili and what they would think about beans?

# ? Nov 11, 2022 14:51

Riot Bimbo: Dec 28, 2006

Prof. Crocodile posted:

have we gotten to the part where we argue about The People Who Invented Chili and what they would think about beans?

No but we can start now

# ? Nov 11, 2022 14:55

SilvergunSuperman: Aug 7, 2010

My grandma makes the lamest fuckin chili in the world and nobody can bear to tell her it's poo poo, so we all eat it "happily."

# ? Nov 11, 2022 15:22

SilkyP: Jul 21, 2004; The Boo-Box

Riot Bimbo posted:

you just sizzle n slap some tofu in your chili

What the gently caress

# ? Nov 11, 2022 15:24

Valko: Sep 18, 2015

Doctor Dogballs posted:

beans or no, chili is a curry

Here, check out my chillicurry recipe.
https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?noseen=0&threadid=4008993&pagenumber=5&perpage=40#post525896347

Yes, it has black beans and I make no apologies for that. :colbert:

# ? Nov 11, 2022 15:41

Valko: Sep 18, 2015

Prof. Crocodile posted:

have we gotten to the part where we argue about The People Who Invented Chili and what they would think about beans?

According to what I've seen from Cowboy Chef Kent Rollins the original chilli might have been more beans than meat.

# ? Nov 11, 2022 15:42

BigBadSteve: Apr 29, 2009

ZeusCannon posted:

Thinking bout them beanZ

# ? Nov 11, 2022 15:44

Riot Bimbo: Dec 28, 2006

Chili was ad hoc for a long time but it's 2022 and it's time to get rid of garbage filler like beans

# ? Nov 11, 2022 15:45

BAGS FLY AT NOON: Apr 6, 2011; A Soft Nylon Bag

SilvergunSuperman posted:

My grandma makes the lamest fuckin chili in the world and nobody can bear to tell her it's poo poo, so we all eat it "happily."

Buy gam-gam a couple cans of beans, should fix it right up

# ? Nov 11, 2022 15:56

SilvergunSuperman: Aug 7, 2010

BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:

Buy gam-gam a couple cans of beans, should fix it right up

She at least puts kidney beans in, she's not a MONSTER.

# ? Nov 11, 2022 16:28

AARD VARKMAN: May 17, 1993

Riot Bimbo posted:

Chili was ad hoc for a long time but it's 2022 and it's time to get rid of garbage filler like beans

actually because it's 2022 beef is expensive as gently caress now and beans are all the more important

# ? Nov 11, 2022 16:48

AARD VARKMAN: May 17, 1993

SilvergunSuperman posted:

My grandma makes the lamest fuckin chili in the world and nobody can bear to tell her it's poo poo, so we all eat it "happily."

even following the directions on a McCormick chili packet makes at least edible chili so im curious what goes in your grandma's chili

# ? Nov 11, 2022 16:49

AARD VARKMAN: May 17, 1993

gonna guess your grandma just GOOD, NOW THROW THAT poo poo AWAY

# ? Nov 11, 2022 16:50

SilvergunSuperman: Aug 7, 2010

AARD VARKMAN posted:

even following the directions on a McCormick chili packet makes at least edible chili so im curious what goes in your grandma's chili

It's probably nearly that and it is "fine" but my dear old dad used to make killer chilli

FULL OF FUCKIN BEANS

# ? Nov 11, 2022 16:54

BAGS FLY AT NOON: Apr 6, 2011; A Soft Nylon Bag

That Carroll Shelby stuff someone posted earlier honestly isn�t bad at all if you don�t have/don�t want to buy a bunch of spices separately. It�s definitely got more depth and heat than a McCormick packet, especially if you doctor up the package directions a little (throw in some diced tomatoes, replace water with beer etc).

# ? Nov 11, 2022 17:02

Smugworth: Apr 18, 2003

BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:

That Carroll Shelby stuff someone posted earlier honestly isn’t bad at all if you don’t have/don’t want to buy a bunch of spices separately. It’s definitely got more depth and heat than a McCormick packet, especially if you doctor up the package directions a little (throw in some diced tomatoes, replace water with beer etc).

(Add your own corn)

# ? Nov 11, 2022 17:41

BAGS FLY AT NOON: Apr 6, 2011; A Soft Nylon Bag

Smugworth posted:

(Add your own corn)

No I don�t think I will

# ? Nov 11, 2022 17:46

Riot Bimbo: Dec 28, 2006

SilkyP posted:

What the gently caress

yeah just melt some butter, some garlic salt, and toast that tofu, put it in the chili, let it hang out in there for a while. it's delicious

# ? Nov 11, 2022 18:03

Prof. Crocodile: Jun 27, 2020

Valko posted:

Here, check out my chillicurry recipe.
https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?noseen=0&threadid=4008993&pagenumber=5&perpage=40#post525896347

Yes, it has black beans and I make no apologies for that.

this sounds p. good. especially the black beans.

# ? Nov 11, 2022 18:13

AARD VARKMAN: May 17, 1993

BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:

That Carroll Shelby stuff someone posted earlier honestly isn’t bad at all if you don’t have/don’t want to buy a bunch of spices separately. It’s definitely got more depth and heat than a McCormick packet, especially if you doctor up the package directions a little (throw in some diced tomatoes, replace water with beer etc).

don't forget a metric fuckload of cumin!!!!

# ? Nov 11, 2022 18:19

Lord Decimus Barnacle: Jun 25, 2005; Hell Gem

Beans are the beans of life you cretin

# ? Nov 11, 2022 18:22

interwhat: Jul 23, 2005; it's kickin in dude

Op was one of those kids that refused to eat anything but oatmeal and mac n cheese. Probably had to wear knee pads on their bike too lmao

# ? Nov 11, 2022 18:23

Smugworth: Apr 18, 2003

Corn is basically yellow beans

# ? Nov 11, 2022 18:28

Luvcow: Jul 1, 2007; One day nearer spring

in honor of the op i'm eating pizza with pepperoni, pineapple and hot sauce for lunch

:thurman:

# ? Nov 11, 2022 19:31

Angry BIerds: Nov 3, 2022; by Fluffdaddy

It is my firm belief that man can subsist on nothing more then chili and anger.

To that end, I have decided to share my own favorite chili recipe with the lot of you, so that you may convert your shame and anger into chili and anger. In this way, I am the best humanitarian who has ever or will ever survive.

I'm going to be breaking a few sacred chili rules here. Too bad; I apologize to no one.

Ingredients:

1 & 1/2 to 2 lbs of ground PORK (perfect way to uncover jews)
2 packages of french onion soup mix (be prepared for your chili to surrender)
2 tablespoons of chili powder (less if you're a baby, more if you're a man)
4 teaspoons of ground cumin (omit this and I will devour your soul)
1 teaspoon of black pepper (slightly racist)
1/2 teaspoon of salt (or none if you're heaving a heart attack right now)
6 ejaculations (squirts) of Tabasco sauce
1 21-ounce can of red beans and 1 21-ounce can of black beans (I have a dream)
2 6-ounce cans of tomato paste with garlic (regular tomato paste = you're an rear end in a top hat)
2 8-ounce cans of tomato sauce (real men need more than just paste)
1 yellow, orange or red pepper, chopped up (green peppers are Satan's taint)
1 package of sliced mushrooms (yes, you can slice your own mushrooms, smartass)

Instructions:

Put the meat in a huge chili pot and brown it over medium heat
Add 4 cups of water and the french onion soup mix. Stir and let simmer for 10 minutes
Stir in the spices and the Tabasco and simmer for another minute or two
Add the beans, the mushrooms and the chopped pepper
Turn to low and let simmer for at least 20 minutes, 40 is better, stirring every 5-10
Call your mother and tell her she's not allowed to hug you anymore

And that's it, you're done. You just went from a pathetic, flaccid pushover to a chili-chewing boner-owner in about an hour. Your life will thank me.

Who's next? Don't even think about posting a recipe with corn in it. You should be ashamed of yourself.

# ? Nov 11, 2022 19:53

Luvcow: Jul 1, 2007; One day nearer spring

EEKA GEEK posted:

It is my firm belief that man can subsist on nothing more then chili and anger.

To that end, I have decided to share my own favorite chili recipe with the lot of you, so that you may convert your shame and anger into chili and anger. In this way, I am the best humanitarian who has ever or will ever survive.

I'm going to be breaking a few sacred chili rules here. Too bad; I apologize to no one.

Ingredients:

1 & 1/2 to 2 lbs of ground PORK (perfect way to uncover jews)

2 packages of french onion soup mix (be prepared for your chili to surrender)

2 tablespoons of chili powder (less if you're a baby, more if you're a man)

4 teaspoons of ground cumin (omit this and I will devour your soul)

1 teaspoon of black pepper (slightly racist)

1/2 teaspoon of salt (or none if you're heaving a heart attack right now)

6 ejaculations (squirts) of Tabasco sauce

1 21-ounce can of red beans and 1 21-ounce can of black beans (I have a dream)

2 6-ounce cans of tomato paste with garlic (regular tomato paste = you're an rear end in a top hat)

2 8-ounce cans of tomato sauce (real men need more than just paste)

1 yellow, orange or red pepper, chopped up (green peppers are Satan's taint)

1 package of sliced mushrooms (yes, you can slice your own mushrooms, smartass)

Instructions:

Put the meat in a huge chili pot and brown it over medium heat

Add 4 cups of water and the french onion soup mix. Stir and let simmer for 10 minutes

Stir in the spices and the Tabasco and simmer for another minute or two

Add the beans, the mushrooms and the chopped pepper

Turn to low and let simmer for at least 20 minutes, 40 is better, stirring every 5-10

Call your mother and tell her she's not allowed to hug you anymore

And that's it, you're done. You just went from a pathetic, flaccid pushover to a chili-chewing boner-owner in about an hour. Your life will thank me.

Who's next? Don't even think about posting a recipe with corn in it. You should be ashamed of yourself.

ein?

# ? Nov 11, 2022 20:12

Riot Bimbo: Dec 28, 2006

Luvcow posted:

in honor of the op i'm eating pizza with pepperoni, pineapple and hot sauce for lunch

my partner has entirely murdered my hate of weird pizza. i am not a pineapple pizza girl but personally i don't care. last night i had a chicken ranch pizza and hey like i prefer a basic rear end pepperoni but it was good anyway

but still gently caress beans in chili motherfucker

# ? Nov 11, 2022 20:40