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Please share your pooping techniques. For me, my diet has been fine tuned in order to create hard fecal pellets. I have trained my abdominal and anal muscles to create what I call a “living gun”. I use my “living gun” to shoot bad guys as long as they stick around long enough so I can remove my pants, and through a series of mirrors, aim directly at a criminal and fire my little turds at high speed. Please dm for more info |
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Nov 26, 2022 05:50
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| # ? May 3, 2024 07:58 |
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the poor man's squatty potty: whilst seated upon ur throne w/ ur knees fully bent, elevate ur feet and scooch the ottoman towards ur terlet. rest ur feet there and squirt w/ all you are might  the shower curtain may come into play here btw |
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Nov 26, 2022 05:59
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back when I was a kid my friends and I would play in the woods near town. Because we were young boys we were all fascinated with the concept of making GBS threads and pissing outside in the woods. So we would drop our pants, hang from low hanging tree branches with our butts pointed downward, and let the turds fall from a great height.
I am a patient they. |
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Nov 26, 2022 08:31
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making GBS threads from the tallest tree in the yard and seeing a little Fortnite quest marker pop up because you got the cheevo.
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Nov 26, 2022 09:04
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emSparkly posted:back when I was a kid my friends and I would play in the woods near town. Because we were young boys we were all fascinated with the concept of making GBS threads and pissing outside in the woods. So we would drop our pants, hang from low hanging tree branches with our butts pointed downward, and let the turds fall from a great height. lol |
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Nov 26, 2022 15:53
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the famous manly standing poo: get into the bathroom, unzip your pants, open the lid, let go, ignore your wife's questions afterwards
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Nov 26, 2022 16:00
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the lumberjack's way: poop out a solid log, don't wipe, stand up, turn around, split the log in two using your pee, don't wipe
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Nov 26, 2022 16:02
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the zombie poop defense, also a famous chess move: sit down on the toilet and poop while the zombies crawl through your pipes, let go the second their zombie faces make it through to the toilet, crush their faces with the might of your faeces, become hero of the people
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Nov 26, 2022 16:04
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I've been doing butt kegels for years in order to poop little cubes like a capybara
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Nov 26, 2022 16:30
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i whatsapp all my shits on the tiktok
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Nov 26, 2022 16:37
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Ghouls are Ghastly posted:the lumberjack's way: |
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Nov 26, 2022 19:42
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lol this is some basic-rear end poo poo
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Nov 27, 2022 00:58
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the sprinkler method: spinning while making GBS threads. if you can get a 3 meter radius of poo poo, everyone gets to go home |
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Nov 27, 2022 03:31
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FutonForensic posted:the sprinkler method: spinning while making GBS threads. if you can get a 3 meter radius of poo poo, everyone gets to go home lmao. a classic |
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Nov 27, 2022 03:33
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Kaiser Schnitzel posted:lol this is some basic-rear end poo poo if ur such hot poo poo then let's hear ur method Mr. Man |
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Nov 27, 2022 03:36
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FutonForensic posted:the sprinkler method: spinning while making GBS threads. if you can get a 3 meter radius of poo poo, everyone gets to go home extremely powerful to boost plant production, farmers have been doing this for 12000 years
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Nov 27, 2022 09:59
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the engineer: when you feel that you will have the rabbit-like poop of small balls falling out of your butt due to your unhealthy but extremely tasty diet, stack up those balls to construct something new, something that is more than the sum of their parts, something the world will have an equal amount of awe as well as questions for
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Nov 27, 2022 10:01
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The immaculate conception: You barely ate fibre, in fact, you barely ate anything at all, you recently pooped and yet, somehow, it just keeps coming. It doesn't stop, there's always more and more and more, where did it come from? Is that the king of kings of the prophecies?
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Nov 27, 2022 10:05
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Areola Grande posted:if ur such hot poo poo then let's hear ur method Mr. Man I’d love to tell you but 
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Nov 28, 2022 18:08
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Poop with your eyes closed! |
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Dec 2, 2022 07:01
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if you take a poo poo wider than it is long in my Denny's, the kids eat for free |
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Dec 2, 2022 07:19
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FutonForensic posted:if you take a poo poo wider than it is long in my Denny's, the kids eat for free lmao. challenge accepted |
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Dec 2, 2022 07:58
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the chocolate rain |
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Dec 2, 2022 10:36
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Stoner Sloth posted:the chocolate rain pls. do go on 
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Dec 2, 2022 10:41
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The girl method: Absolutely destroy a bathroom, by any means necessary--and then pretend it never loving happened.
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Dec 2, 2022 17:00
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Poop with only one hand! |
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Dec 2, 2022 17:57
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my innovations stem not in the act, a trite approach to novelty, but instead in the quantification, for i measure poo poo in cubits, half-acres, hands, and microplastics composition
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Dec 2, 2022 18:03
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the true measure of a poo poo is not in the poo poo itself, but in the sweat of the shitter's brow
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Dec 2, 2022 18:12
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There'd be a safe, wrapped in chains and sunk to the bottom of the ocean and somehow Harry Houdini would take a poo poo in it. |
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Dec 2, 2022 19:24
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harry houdini but all of his escapes are just him absconding after making GBS threads somewhere. there's poo poo at every one |
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Dec 2, 2022 19:49
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You can use the seat to sit, but a real pro uses it as a target ring to bullseye as they're doing a handstand 3 stalls over |
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Dec 2, 2022 19:59
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cursive |
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Dec 2, 2022 20:05
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if you poo poo in all caps, people think you're shouting, and it's rude
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Dec 2, 2022 20:28
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Scaly Haylie posted:cursive lol |
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Dec 2, 2022 20:32
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diarrhea: the italics of the butt |
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Dec 2, 2022 20:35
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The Hello Machine posted:Poop with only one hand! Having had surgery on my dominant arm last year leaving my arm unusable for weeks then barely usable for months (it mostly works now but my other arm is screwed up now from overcompensating), getting TP and wiping with only your non-dominate hand is awkward, more than you might imagine, try it! No cheating either and going "this is hard" you gotta finish the deed. Results may vary but I have friends who agreed. Expecting trip reports!
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Dec 3, 2022 02:27
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i just don't. it's gross.
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Dec 3, 2022 03:05
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emSparkly posted:back when I was a kid my friends and I would play in the woods near town. Because we were young boys we were all fascinated with the concept of making GBS threads and pissing outside in the woods. So we would drop our pants, hang from low hanging tree branches with our butts pointed downward, and let the turds fall from a great height. reminds me of a similar story from when I was a kid. this guy we knew once climbed up a tree and sat on a branch with his trousers down then took a poo poo out of the tree. for no other reason than that we were teenage boys and poo poo like that was hilarious to us. but little did we know the true comedy was yet to come. when our friend was finished pooping and tried to reach down and pull up his trousers so that he could climb down he lost his balance and fell out of the tree with his pants down and landed right in the dump he just took. |
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Dec 4, 2022 01:01
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You can reuse a shitpost in a thread about pooping!
https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
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Dec 4, 2022 01:41
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| # ? May 3, 2024 07:58 |
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Heather Papps posted:i just don't. it's gross. when I was in college I was on a long car trip with this guy I barely knew and he was really boring me with his monologue so for some reason I told him that ever since I went vegan I only had to go to the bathroom once a month, just to change the subject, and he believed me, so for the rest of my time if I knew he was around I had to hold it in
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Dec 5, 2022 10:54
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