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Glad that Kalan's potential has risen a bit instead of dropping 10 points like I feared. Also don't really care about the hometown, so he and Kaplan can be baseball buddies. Edit: update on previous page
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Jan 23, 2023 16:36
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Admiral Joeslop posted:The Cubs?? God damnit Doug you were supposed to go to the Padres. Yup, OOTP continues to generate thousands of players that can be drafted or signed as international free agents.
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Jan 23, 2023 17:44
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Putting new player in a new post! Name: Charlie Brown Nickname: "Good Grief" Position: Starting Pitcher Player Type: (EDIT: RIght Handed) A lot of stamina, random everything else. Nationality/Hometown: Sebastopol, California (Charles Schulz' first studio was here) Number: 00 Height and Weight: 5'2", 105 lbs Picture: 
Armitage fucked around with this message at 18:17 on Jan 23, 2023 |
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Jan 23, 2023 17:53
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Name: "Storg" Nickname: Storg Position: 1B/DH Player Type: Adam Dunn, if Adam Dunn were 8 ft tall and built like a small mountain. Nationality/Hometown: Marquisate of Evermark. (just use somewhere else imaginary, like Canada) Number: He can't reliably count, so who cares. Height and Weight: as close to 8'3", 575 lbs as the engine will manage. Attributes Str: 15 Dex: 8 Con: 11 Int: 6 Wis: 3 Cha: 9 habeasdorkus fucked around with this message at 03:59 on Jan 25, 2023 |
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Jan 23, 2023 18:15
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Name: Kazuki Saito Nickname: Leave it blank for now. Position: 3B or CF Player Type: All-Rounder Nationality/Hometown: Sapporo, Hokkaido, Japan Number: 14 Height/Weight: 6'1", 230 lbs Appearance: "Photo" courtesy of This Person Does Not Exist 
Monathin fucked around with this message at 18:52 on Jan 23, 2023 |
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Jan 23, 2023 18:46
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I'm glad Bitchface decided not to sign. The disgrace of playing for Washington is something he did not want to keep experiencing. Name: Jim-Bob Marsh Nickname:Gatorface Position: Catcher Player Type: Incredible Switch Power Hitter but slow as balls Nationality/Hometown: The Everglades Number: 22 Height/Weight: 6'6", 400 lbs Appearance: 
Humbug Scoolbus fucked around with this message at 19:12 on Jan 23, 2023 |
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Jan 23, 2023 19:08
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Hell yeah this rules, I'll add one to the pile. Name: Tim McCracken Nickname: "Dr.Hook" Position: 3B Player Type: cannon arm power guy Nationality/Hometown: North Battleford, Saskatchewan Number: 77 Height and Weight: 6'2 205lbs Gerblederp fucked around with this message at 21:17 on Jan 23, 2023 |
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Jan 23, 2023 19:48
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Name: Zell Dincht Nickname: Hot Dog Position: OF Player Type: Toolsy but impulsive. Baez-like. Nationality/Hometown: Eugene, Oregon Number: 3 Height/Weight: 5'10"/170 Appearance: Blond, blue eyes, scrappy, sick tribal facial tattoo.
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Jan 23, 2023 20:14
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I mean, I knew it was a risk when I made Aaron come from the Pittsburgh suburbs but… playing for the Pirates? Yikes. Well, we’ll cross our fingers.
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Jan 23, 2023 20:32
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Oh gently caress yeah we're doing this again Name: Prince Vegeta Nickname: "The Prince Of All Saiyans" Position: Starting Pitcher Player Type: Literal fireballer. Also extremely prideful. Nationality/Hometown: Saiyan, Planet Vegeta (if OOTP won't let you select that, go with Akira Toriyama's hometown of Kiyosu, Aichi Prefecture, Japan) Number: One Height and Weight: 5'4", 123 lbs (according to the DBZ wiki) Appearance: 
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Jan 23, 2023 20:47
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theamazingchris posted:I mean, I knew it was a risk when I made Aaron come from the Pittsburgh suburbs but… playing for the Pirates? Yikes. Well, we’ll cross our fingers. I am so sorry.
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Jan 23, 2023 20:52
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bradburypancakes posted:Name: Cadoc Faughn Cadoc Faughn    (It took a LOT of tries to get a catcher who could bunt, and the hometown didn't find Porthyrhyd so I did the closest town it recognized) Cadoc Faughn is our first Welshman of the goons, and looks to be an above average catcher with solid but unspectacular skills across the board. Bunting however is his forte - it is a shame he's as slow as Glasscock, because that bunt for hit stat is pretty great. I'll definitely check in periodically to see if he manages to pull it off, because the image of a Bartolo-colon level speed bunting for a hit is a pretty great one. Personality-wise he has an extremely high work ethic, adaptability, and desire for winning - so he's basically an anime protagonist. got some chores tonight posted:Name: Lebron James Lebron James    Lebron "Better than Michael" James was born in 2003, the same year his namesake was drafted to the NBA. He openly welcomes (and maybe spreads?) rumors that Lebron James is his father - though his abilities, and work ethic (5/200, yikes) suggest otherwise. Mediocre across the board, James probably still has a future as a decent corner outfielder in the MLB - but he definitely looks to be one of the less talented of the first goon generation. Maybe he will shock us all and become a superstar stud like the real Lebron? Fat and Useless posted:I'm gonna base those balls so hard. Carl Tubbs    Carl "Useless" Tubbs showed up to the draft claiming to escape harassment by troublesome neighbors, and distinguished himself as a fairly talented Center Fielder. He has the potential to play a pretty solid left field, and has decent batting stats, so I'm unsure why the game rates him so low. It may be that outfielder is a lush position, and his mediocre center-fielding ability makes him lovely REALTIVE to other CF's, but maybe the game knows more about him than we do.  I also love that he's by far the greediest goon as well, though his humility in handling success maybe doesn't live up to his namesake. BraveLittleToaster posted:Name: Billy Dee Billy Dee     Those batting potentials! Billy "Pickle" Dee is almost certainly the most talented pure hitter of the goon class so far - he's pretty worthless on the base paths and has a noodle arm that can barely throw, but can absolutely rake when he makes contact with the ball. I'll definitely be curious to see if he ends up as a first baseman or even a dedicated DH early in his career - he has the talent to pull it off. He better hope he gets drafted by an American League team.Personality-wise, his work ethic is a bit lacking, but he handles success, failure, and criticism extremely well - so let's hope that he can realize his extreme potential. (I know you said you wanted to be all around talented but this set of hitting stats were too great to pass up). IcePhoenix posted:Name: Cash Considerations Cash Considerations    Cash "Money" Considerations is a man of many talents - able to play most infield positions, scouts have touted him as a potential power and contact hitter, with speed and basestealing ability to boot. Cash Money's main problem is discipline - he is known for living a lavish lifestyle, having already mortgaged his future signing bonus for a car, house, and various luxury expenses. But as cash money is known for saying, "gently caress the haters"  (I'm sad he's not greedier, but the man knows his limits). totally losing my mime posted:Name: Rex Sisters Rex Sisters    Conceived at the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally and born in nearby Faith, SD, Rex "Tyrant" Sisters is a gentle giant. He is known for his community volunteer work and overall kind demeanor, and scouts consider him a potential future fan favorite for his charity work and overall kindness. In terms of baseball talent, Rex has the potential for a solid starting third baseman - he's above average in most hitting categories, with a bit of a nasty tendency to strikeout. With such a positive attitude and a delightfully ironic name, Rex likely has a great future ahead of him. (The game rolled your dude with the "sparkplug" personality, which will not only help him, but his entire team!). Nissin Cup Nudist posted:Name: Biggus Dickus Biggus Dickus    Biggus "Horse" Dickus is... an interesting player. Knuckleballers are among the strangest of players - it took me AGES to find a working knuckleballer due to their extreme rarity. The game doesn't really like knuckleballers so his ratings may not be very representative - if he can get that knuckleball pitch to work, he could be a decent player, but it's very much all or nothing. I honestly don't even know how control or movement work into the knuckleball, but we'll definitely be watching him with great interest to see how he develops. For those unfamiliar, here's a gif of what a knuckleball looks like in flight - to get a sense of why they're hard to hit (and hard to catch and throw):  Also, I don't know how, but after I named him Biggus Dickus the game immediately generated the spitting image of Pete Davdison. So I call it fate. Oh - and I corrected him to a lefty after I made the post. Explosionface posted:gently caress yes, this was so fun last time. Splodey Face    Splodey Face is a classic Three True Outcomes (TTO) guy - when he goes up to bat, he will likely either walk, strikeout, or hit a dinger. The outcome is free by the corrupting influence of fielding. This strategy does come with risks - Splodey will need to hope his power and discipline can make up for his complete lack of contact ability. However he does have the work ethic (174/200) to potentially pull it off - only time will tell! That's all the goons I have time to generate for now - I will make another handful later and sim 2023! JosefStalinator fucked around with this message at 21:09 on Jan 23, 2023 |
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Jan 23, 2023 20:57
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Name: Howard Duck Nickname: Iron Duck Position: Random or whatever you think is best. Player Type: A real rear end in a top hat when even the smallest thing doesn't go his way. Like one of Machado's outbursts. Nationality/Hometown: Duck/Duckworld (or random if custom isn't allowed) Number: 19 Height and Weight: 2' 7", 45 lbs Appearance: 
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Jan 23, 2023 20:57
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Admiral Joeslop posted:The Cubs?? God damnit Doug you were supposed to go to the Padres. The game can theoretically go on forever, and like someone else said, it just generates dudes randomly. Eventually you'll get to a point where there's no one "real" left, but it keeps the records and whatnot. Admiral Joeslop posted:I love that Fat Doug pitches right but bats left Done! The height/weight seems to be flavor anyway, I don't think it actually changes any game stuff. We'll see if Douglas ends up doing some insane stuff with his height. Red posted:Can we put some little guy like Nicky Lopez on a massive amount of steroids? We can't openly roid out any players, but players CAN (and often do) get caught using PEDs and face suspensions. I think their personality increases the likelihood of it happening, like if they're obsessed with winning, have high controversy, maybe low work ethic? A quick google just now actually shows that the MLB demanded that they take out steroid storylines from any MLB games (fictional is okay) as an MLBPA demand. I think other stuff is possible, but now I'm wondering what controversies do remain in the game. Apparently they can still run for Congress, so *shrug*. theamazingchris posted:I mean, I knew it was a risk when I made Aaron come from the Pittsburgh suburbs but… playing for the Pirates? Yikes. Well, we’ll cross our fingers. OOTP doesn't sim for the mismanagement/cursed nature of franchises so you might be okay. See how the Nationals and Mets thrive here. I'm working on a way to use OOTP's integration with Google Earth to showcase our goons - unfortunately it makes it so that you can show players by team/league, but not my custom goon shortlist. I'll see if I can figure it out without breaking the game. Also a note for everyone choosing wacky hometowns - the game is integrated into google earth as noted above, so it needs to be a real place for the game to recognize it. Tiny towns generally don't show up but they SOMETIMES do - so I'll do my best to approximate based on whatever you give me!
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Jan 23, 2023 21:07
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Hell yeah that potential line for Cash.
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Jan 23, 2023 21:10
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  A fun little look at the origins of our goons so far - shockingly, all of you have chosen NA or Europe as your hometowns (except for Georgian Stalin). I honestly figured I'd get more "St. Helena" or "loving, Austria". A bit tedious to be honest (I have to manually move everyone to an expansion team in order to make it show them exclusively), but not a bad feature!
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Jan 23, 2023 21:21
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It's not the all-round guy I expected, but it seems like Billy Dee here could learn to swing bat pretty drat well, and that's as good as anything. I have high hopes!
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Jan 23, 2023 21:27
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JosefStalinator posted:We can't openly roid out any players, but players CAN (and often do) get caught using PEDs and face suspensions. I think their personality increases the likelihood of it happening, like if they're obsessed with winning, have high controversy, maybe low work ethic? Can you edit their stats between seasons to increase power/controversy/desire/greed? And I guess add 25-30 pounds?
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Jan 23, 2023 21:49
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JosefStalinator posted:Done! The height/weight seems to be flavor anyway, I don't think it actually changes any game stuff. We'll see if Douglas ends up doing some insane stuff with his height. If I remember OOTP 22 correctly, height only matters when it comes to first base defense.
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Jan 23, 2023 22:08
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Name: Actually Goku Nickname: Lets see what the game does Position: CF Player Type: Stupidly strong. The strongest. Nationality/Hometown: Japan Number: 55 Height and Weight: 5' 7", 240lb Appearance: It's goku. We all know goku.
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Jan 23, 2023 22:33
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Armitage posted:If I remember OOTP 22 correctly, height only matters when it comes to first base defense. ...erm, I'd like José Alface to be tall again!
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Jan 23, 2023 23:34
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On the one hand, I'm kinda surprised that Stupid's already been drafted. On the other, I'm really surprised that he's having health issues before even really joining. That doesn't really bode well for his career, does it? Anyway, if we're allowed to make multiple players each, maybe I should toss another on the pile. Name: Fat Bastard Nickname: King Hippo Position: First Base Player Type: Surprise me Nationality/Hometown: Honolulu, Hawaii Number: 99 (it's the number of servings he had at dinner last night) Height and Weight: 5'7", 917 lbs Appearance: Really ugly, and (if the engine allows) really fat. Or, y'know, just grab a picture of King Hippo from Punch-Out.
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Jan 23, 2023 23:41
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JosefStalinator posted:I honestly figured I'd get more "St. Helena" or "loving, Austria". I had loving written down but figured it'd be too obvious.
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Jan 24, 2023 00:18
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Name: C.J.T.J.C.J.B. Clips Nickname: <random> Position: LF Player Type: Ichiro-esque, which I think is a perfectly fine description Nationality/Hometown: Winnipeg, MB Number: 70 Height and Weight: 6'3", 200lbs Appearance: Like somebody just went loving apeshit with the sliders in Skyrim
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Jan 24, 2023 01:14
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Handles Failure: 35 That's good right!? I don't think my lad is built for the expectations of the world.
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Jan 24, 2023 02:09
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Fat and Useless posted:
It's fine, baseball players succeed in their efforts most of the time
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Jan 24, 2023 17:14
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Namtab posted:Name: Actually Goku I can't wait for Goku to face Vegeta... I will be really disappointed if they're on the same team, and excited if they're divisional rivals. camoseven posted:It's fine, baseball players succeed in their efforts most of the time What could go wrong! The game models morale fairly extensively - players mood swings up and down based on their performance, team performance, their role on the team, etc. Their morale directly impacts their play - so players with poor handling of their success/failure will be slaves to the vagaries of luck, while those with better mental fortitude will realize their talent. ajkalan posted:I had loving written down but figured it'd be too obvious. This comedy forum peaked in 2007, you don't need to be too creative my friend. Average Lettuce posted:...erm, I'd like José Alface to be tall again! TOO LATE Gonna roll up another couple of goons and do batch 2 soon!
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Jan 24, 2023 23:14
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This looks awesome - here's another player if not too late: Name: Potato Manjack Nickname: Position: Starting Pitcher (SP) (L handed) Player Type: Ballsy Arrogant Jerk Nationality/Hometown: Poopville, Nebraska Number: 50 Height and Weight: 5'10, 165lbs 
PotatoManJack fucked around with this message at 23:38 on Jan 24, 2023 |
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Jan 24, 2023 23:35
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Red posted:Name: Reggie Blank Reggie Blank    Reggie "The Blank" Blank is a baseball player. He likes to hit the ball hard, and runs very fast. Sometimes he hits the ball so hard it goes out over the fence. Scouts like him very much, but often forget he is there. He wants to get better at fielding. Reggie hopes he will be drafted and play baseball well. He may do very well, he may not. In conclusion, Reggie is a man of contrasts.  Reggie has a personality. It is very normal. ItohRespectArmy posted:Name: Mikhail Tukhachevsky Mikhail Tukhachevsky    Mikhail "Red Napoleon" Tukhachevsky was born in Smolensk Russia to a poor family. His father worked at the local Pizza Hut 80 hours a week to save money so the family could relocate to the promised land - the United States of America. His father had but one dream - that his son would play baseball in the United States, reversing their monetary misfortunes, and bringing glory to a family down on its luck. Studying hard lest he attract the wrath of his father, Mikhail finished school in the United States and attended Stanford University, finding himself uniquely talented at the American sport of baseball. Yet his time in college has changed him, as resentment about betraying his motherland has manifest in a rejection of all things American - except baseball. Styling himself the "Red Napoleon," Mikhail has taken it upon himself to crush the class traitors that he faces on the field. Mikhail's anger has helped him realize two very important talents - he can hit a baseball very hard, and run very, very fast. Rumor has it that his power comes from imagining the ball as the face of his political enemies - though his closer friends (what few he has), claim they instead hear him uttering his father's name...  Someone's urgin' for a purgin' with that loyalty! Kirios posted:Name: Jon Dowd Jon Dowd    Jon "THE GOAT" Dowd is a strange and mysterious character - he allegedly showed up to scouting practice uninvited, claiming that his name was not on the list due to a "labor dispute," but his sheer charm and magnetism convinced scouts to give him a try. They found an excellent power hitter with mediocre fielding and speed - despite his apparent youth. Apparent is the key word here, for future investigations into his background failed to turn up any evidence of his existence before tryouts - his name failed to appear on birth or social security records, and what few documents he provided were clearly altered from an original DOB of July 24, 1964. Fortunately for Jon, any controversy regarding his confused background has been ignored due his sheer talent, magnetism, and boyish charms.  I have not altered his personality (or any of your personalities) in any way. Somehow he turned out to be our only "prankster" personality, and has an insane IQ and leadership ability. The game is sentient. Armitage posted:Putting new player in a new post! Charlie Brown    Diminutive Charlie "Good Grief" Brown easily takes the award as the smallest goon, at a svelt 105 pounds. Mr. Brown's life story is one of woe, as he is the apparent subject of great misfortunes. His arrival at the scouting tryouts was invariably late due to a succession of crises - car accidents, power outages, explosive diarrhea, and allegedly, haunting by a giant, menacing flying pumpkin. His talents similarly leave something to be desired - while he has solid control, his pitches are not quite up to snuff - yet Charlie presses ever onward, hoping that THIS TIME, things will be different.  Charlie ain't gonna let his failure get to him.  And thus our goon family grows! We are now at 25 goons in total and still growing! It definitely seems like the second class got a bit less lucky with their generation - part of it was the d20 was less kind to them (I rolled 2 20's the first time, and highest this time was 17), but also just some bad luck in the OOTP player generation itself. It may also be a product of some inflation - all the ratings are relative not absolute, so if we generate a bunch of ubermensch, they may start to bring up the average. Feel free to keep signing up with goons as you desire! I haven't forgotten those waiting patiently - I am just trying to do the goons in groups of ~12 per year, to space them out a tiny bit. Coming up, the end of 2022 and beginnings of 2023!
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Jan 25, 2023 00:06
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JosefStalinator posted:Charlie Brown
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Jan 25, 2023 00:23
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CptWedgie posted:...Well, A for effort, but he kinda sucks. And by "kinda" I mean "completely and utterly." Good grief.
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Jan 25, 2023 00:29
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Argh!
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Jan 25, 2023 00:53
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JosefStalinator posted:I can't wait for Goku to face Vegeta... I will be really disappointed if they're on the same team, and excited if they're divisional rivals. Clearly they have go in on the same year
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Jan 25, 2023 00:55
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2023 Season There's still a bit of unfinished business before the 2023 Season - we have the offseason where Free Agents will file and find new teams, big blockbuster trades might occur, and stupid men who write about baseball for a living will vote for players to be inducted into the exalted baseball Hall of Fame! I'll follow some of the bigger events for my baseball heads - few if any goons will see much movement yet.  The Dodgers unsurprisingly make one of the first big moves - signing talented Third Baseman Xander Bogaerts.  MLB begins a new lottery system to determine the draft order for the 2023 draft - potentially impacting our most talented goons. Among the six worst teams, Detroit wins the lottery and will pick first, followed by the Rangers.  Boston signs OF/1B Trey Mancini to a hefty deal - $35 million over three years. Why so much money? I have no idea - he did alright with Baltimore/Cleveland in the 2022 of the Gooniverse, but even IRL he got a 2-year 20 million deal with the Cubs, so it's not that far off. The Mariners end up with a bargain compared to the real world - signing Jose Abreu to a 3 year, 36 million dollar deal. The IRL Astros paid $58 million for the same thing.  Carlos Rodon also gets paid!  Boston goes big and signs one of the biggest names in Free Agency - Carlos Correa, NOT pending phsyical.  The ancient owner of the Cleveland Guardians dies. So does Peter Angelos of the Orioles (congrats Orioles fans). The results of the 2023 Hall of Fame Class come in, with few surprises: The Hall of Fame in baseball is an elusive honor, and the process of induction is highly structured. In order to be inducted, one must receive 75% of votes from a selection of sportswriters. Those failing to receive 5% will be eliminated, with those between 5% and 75% remaining on the ballot for a maximum of 10 years.  Alex Rodriguez is inducted on his second ballot, receiving a hefty 98.9% of the vote. This JUST happened in real life a few minutes ago as well, so I'll also post the IRL 2023 ballot results:  In real life Scott Rolen just got inducted by barely crossing the 75% threshold. Why such a huge discrepancy between the OOTP and real life HoF ballots? The same reason our lord and savior Barrold Lamar Bonds is not in the Hall of Fame - PEDs (steroids). I won't get into that here, but just know that sportswriters are not always the smartest of folks. February 2023 sees the offseason turn into the pre-season. OOTP offers a nice little summary for us:   The Dodgers are the big winners, alongside the Cubs and shockingly, the Orioles. The Yankees bleed nearly all their major talent (as do the nationals), signing only Blake Snell and Yan Gomes to make up for their losses.    A quick peek at our goons as Spring Training begins sees that Antoni Kemping has skyrocketed past the other goons to be promoted to AA, followed closely by Sir Plusse at Single A!  This may be the result of Spring Training and expanded rosters, but we will see how everyone fairs come opening day!  Antoni Kemping doesn't manage to stay in AA, but Single A is his and his alone come opening day! Will he be the first to reach the majors? Only time will tell.  OOTP thinks the Angels and Orioles will dominate their divisions in 2023. As previously noted, this is because OOTP does not simulate the cursed and incompetent nature of certain franchises.  I guess it still understands what it means to pitch for the Mets at least.  Forgettable starter for the Minnesota Twins Joe Ryan throws a perfect game - only the 24th in history, and the most recent since 2012.  The All-Star game comes and goes. Again, no goons are at the level to be relevant yet, so we can let the days roll by. Most importantly though... we have the 2023 Amateur Draft!  Surprising no one, the Goons once again dominate the top 10 list. Reggie Blank edges out Billy Dee for the number 1 spot, but goons take 7 of the top 10 for what should be a fun time. Bitchface is back to try his luck a second time. (I foolishly forgot to screenshot the draft order before it simmed, oopsie!) 2023 Amateur Draft Results 1.1 Reggie Blank, CF - Detroit Tigers 1.2 Billy Dee, LF - Texas Rangers 1.3 Rex Sisters, 3B - San Diego Padres 1.4 Beauregard Bitchface, SS - Baltimore Orioles 1.5 Cash Considerations, 2B - Pittsburgh Pirates 1.6 Mikhal Tukhachevsky, SS - Washington Nationals 1.8 Splodey Face, 2B - Philadelphia Phillies 1.9 Mr. Panda, SP - Minnesota Twins 1.15 Biggus Dickus, SP - Chicago White Sox 1.19 Jon Down, LF - San Francisco Giants (  NO FUCKIN WAY, I swear I had no hand in this)1.23 Carl Tubbs, CF - Milwaukee Brewers 1.33 Charlie Brown, SP - Los Angeles Dodgers 2.4 Cadoc Vaughn, C - Baltimore Orioles UNDRAFTED - Lebron James, LF (going back to college) Some shocking results! Goons clean up the first 6 spots, and take 8 of the first 10 picks. We have our first undrafted goon in Lebron James - but he is still young, and may yet develop and get drafted out of college. Bitchface shows me what's for and improves his draft position this year, moving from 5 to 4. We see our first pair of goons drafted on the same team at the same time (the orioles picking up 2 Goons), to bring their total goons to a leading 3 (assuming they all sign). Reggie Blank joins Sir Plusse with the Tigers, and Dee with Snorp on the Rangers, among other pairs. Jon Dowd allegedly arrived to the amateur draft in full Giants gear - a full hour before his drafting. Those who questioned him about this flagrant faux pas were met with a smirk and repeated utterances of "just wait" from the strange man, who unemotionally accepted his drafting to the Giants as a "foregone conclusion." Now the question is - will they sign? And how much will they make? While we sim through the season, our first tragedy strikes:   Aaron Zinn of the 2022 draft class suffers a horrendous injury, tearing his UCL and missing nearly a year of play. This is particularly bad because injuries like this have the potential to destroy a player's ratings - but we will have to wait for his recovery to see how much he suffers. As of right now, he stands at a potential of 62. 2023 Amateur Draft Results - Signings 1.1 Reggie Blank, CF - Detroit Tigers - $13,750,000 1.2 Billy Dee, LF - Texas Rangers - $8,330,000 1.3 Rex Sisters, 3B - San Diego Padres - $8,020,000 1.4 Beauregard Bitchface, SS - Baltimore Orioles - $12,270,000 1.5 Cash Considerations, 2B - Pittsburgh Pirates - $6,240,000 1.6 Mikhal Tukhachevsky, SS - Washington Nationals - $7,250,000 1.8 Splodey Face, 2B - Philadelphia Phillies - $5,690,000 1.9 Mr. Panda, SP - Minnesota Twins - FAILED TO SIGN (College) 1.15 Biggus Dickus, SP - Chicago White Sox - $13,330,000 1.19 Jon Down, LF - San Francisco Giants - $6,240,000 1.23 Carl Tubbs, CF - Milwaukee Brewers - $4,050,000 1.33 Charlie Brown, SP - Los Angeles Dodgers - $11,000,000 2.4 Cadoc Vaughn, C - Baltimore Orioles - $2,040,000 UNDRAFTED - Lebron James, LF (going back to college) Everyone but Mr. Panda proceeds to sign, with Reggie Blank tying John Cena and Jose Alface for the most paid players so far. I would like to note that Biggus Dickus nearly met the first place pick despite falling down to 15th overall - demonstrating the Big Dick Energy (tm) that we expect from him. Similar props to Charlie Brown. Good grief! Thus drafted, here's where our goons stand about 2/3 of the way through the 2023 season:  I'd failed to realize that the Pirates also signed 3 goons - and as such, the Orioles and Pirates claim 3 goons each, with Detroit, San Francisco, and Texas claiming 2 each. (Kannapolis is the White Sox affiliate). Biggus Dickus appears to be developing the fastest of the goons (har har), as his "overall" rating has already crept up to 27 - with Sir Plusse and AJ Kalan on his heels in the high 20's. This is a very big deal - your potential ratings mean nothing if you never actually realize them - at least one of our high rated, 70 or 80 potential guys will be stuck in the 20's and 30's forever and flop. You can also eventually overcome your initial ratings too - so never despair! Biggus Dickus also makes his way to Single A alongside Carl Tubbs - the race to be first to the MLB continues apace! Feel free to take note of any other wild swings in your guys' overall or potential ratings and post about it or ask questions, as I'm not quite able to follow each of their subtle fluctuations. I will note that Billy Dee remains the only 80 potential rated player. EDIT: Bonus chart, is your player happy or sad right now?  Next time, we (quickly) finish the 2023 season! JosefStalinator fucked around with this message at 01:34 on Jan 25, 2023 |
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Jan 25, 2023 01:30
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CptWedgie posted:...Well, A for effort, but he kinda sucks. And by "kinda" I mean "completely and utterly." I don't think he's that bad, despite years of losing games 123-0 and having hundreds of comebackers knock him silly. The Dodgers definitely don't care about that, gave him $11 million, yowza. Armitage fucked around with this message at 01:41 on Jan 25, 2023 |
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Jan 25, 2023 01:39
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JosefStalinator posted:
Doesn't account for the cursed nature of some franchises, eh?
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Jan 25, 2023 01:41
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I'll add another!: Name: Salvatore Silencio Nickname: The Silencer Position: Closing Pitcher Player Type: Flamethrower; relies on fastball, slider, and screwball delivered via an unorthodox delayed windup to throw batters off. Nationality/Hometown: Long Island, NY Number: 86 Height and Weight: 6'1", 222 lbs. Appearance: Italian man of medium build, with coiffed mobster hairdo. Clean shaven. Wears a two gold necklaces with pendants; one a cross, the other a bullet casing. Extremely arrogant and dismissive.
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Jan 25, 2023 02:22
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So how're Plusse's pitches coming along so far?
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Jan 25, 2023 02:37
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JosefStalinator posted:
JosefStalinator posted:
lol
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Jan 25, 2023 02:47
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Carl is just out living his best little fake CF life, good for him.
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Jan 25, 2023 03:23
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