|
Very Wool!
|
#
¿
Jul 12, 2023 00:12
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 22, 2024 06:48 |
|
|
It was our fault for letting for those high schoolers dance at their prom.
|
|
#
¿
Jul 13, 2023 23:25
|
|
|
Sounds like you could use a little R&R. Rum and Ritalin.
|
|
#
¿
Jul 16, 2023 05:38
|
|
|
I’m thirsty. Family! Who’s in charge of my thirst?
|
|
#
¿
Jul 17, 2023 05:44
|
|
|
Not only is your fly open, there’s a pencil sticking out of it.
|
|
#
¿
Jul 20, 2023 01:48
|
|
|
Are you pickling squirrel meat? Because I can lend you my skull presser.
|
|
#
¿
Jul 20, 2023 05:34
|
|
|
On D-day, my grandfather wore a German uniform under his American one, just in case.
|
|
#
¿
Jul 24, 2023 06:23
|
|
|
Well that's redundant. All pregnancies are hysterical. They're started by penises.
|
|
#
¿
Jul 26, 2023 05:34
|
|
|
I've got other ideas, like a microbrewery that also serves frozen yogurt. I'm gonna call it "Microsoft."
|
|
#
¿
Jul 29, 2023 17:08
|
|
|
The Hapsburg line... has ended. You can pick up your gift bags at the coat check.
|
|
#
¿
Jul 31, 2023 20:16
|
|
|
I am so on a roll! No crying in my bath tonight.
|
|
#
¿
Aug 3, 2023 06:27
|
|
|
Ugh! Fine, Lithgow! I'll do the right thing.
|
|
#
¿
Aug 6, 2023 20:29
|
|
|
Would a mother be planning a sex tour of Vietnam this spring?
|
|
#
¿
Aug 10, 2023 05:39
|
|
|
We have no way of knowing where the heart is.
|
|
#
¿
Aug 14, 2023 19:41
|
|
|
Have you ever been to knuckle beach? It's a totally different world; a world where orange soda is an acceptable substitute for breast milk.
|
|
#
¿
Aug 16, 2023 02:30
|
|
|
I'm sorry. I have an erection. I think it's the sound of the skateboard
|
|
#
¿
Aug 18, 2023 04:51
|
|
|
Smooth move, Ferguson.
|
|
#
¿
Aug 22, 2023 15:03
|
|
|
Stop sweating, you idiot. What is wrong with you, you stupid bitch!?
|
|
#
¿
Sep 2, 2023 23:24
|
|
|
We no longer want to hit that. Get off MILF Island.
|
|
#
¿
Sep 6, 2023 18:12
|
|
|
One word: coffee. One problem: where do you get it Anywhere! You get it anywhere! Wrong! You get it at my coffee vending machine. 38th & 6th in the basement of the K-Mart. You just go downstairs, you get the key from David and BOOM! You plug in the machine and..
|
|
#
¿
Sep 22, 2023 19:04
|
|
|
Really Hulu? You want to cancel the only show on your network starring a 42-year-old woman? A show that is number 1 in its timeslot among men 18 to 49 months left in prison?
|
|
#
¿
Oct 19, 2023 19:37
|
|
|
Oh the merry men of Princeton are charging up the rear, holding all the balls
|
|
#
¿
Nov 10, 2023 21:10
|
|
|
I hate you, Nermal! Almost as much as I hate Mondays! This is my lasagna! You hear me, Nermal? My lasagna!
|
|
#
¿
Nov 13, 2023 21:16
|
|
|
Good god, holefoods, your breath. When did you find the time to eat a diaper you found on the beach?
|
|
#
¿
Nov 27, 2023 00:18
|
|
|
There are four things I want to do this summer, but they’re roommates so it’s tricky.
|
|
#
¿
Dec 1, 2023 21:06
|
|
|
Tracy, I don't know how to say this. Dee-ay-buh-tees?
|
|
#
¿
Dec 11, 2023 20:51
|
|
|
I can't read! I sign my name with an X! I once tried to make mashed potatoes with laundry detergent! I think I voted for Nader! NADER
|
|
#
¿
Dec 12, 2023 21:54
|
|
|
It's after six. What am I, a farmer?
|
|
#
¿
Dec 27, 2023 05:56
|
|
|
A pack of wild dogs took over and successfully ran a Wendy’s
|
|
#
¿
Feb 8, 2024 19:08
|
|
|
potee, this need you have to be the smartest guy in the room is... offputting.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 9, 2024 07:47
|
|
|
I've watched Newt Gingrich eat a plate of ribs. I think my stomach can handle some rhubarb leaves.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 29, 2024 15:37
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 22, 2024 06:48 |
|
|
It's supposed to be a nice area, except for the "new element" everyone keeps talking about.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 11, 2024 22:07
|
|