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Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



I found it on my favorite website, stop showing off Dot Com

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Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



You know what they say, boys. If you can't take the heat, get off of Mickey Rourke's sex grill.

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



It just sounds so HATEFUL when you say it!

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Dammit Johnny, you know I love my big beef and cheddar!!!

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



My single "My Single Is Dropping" is dropping.

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



It's after six. What am I, a farmer?

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



MokBa posted:

The Irma Luhrman-Merman murder
Turned the bird’s word lurid
The whir and the purr of a twirler girl
She would the world were demurer
The insurer’s allure
For valor were pure Kari Wuhrer
One fervid whirl over her turgid error

gently caress I forgot the Rural Juror bit, it's so good

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



I've never been so disrespected in my life. And I've gone to AND worked at the post office.

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



UGH, MY PERIOD

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Haaaaaaaaam

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



You can try to change New York but it's like Jay-Z says: concrete bunghole where dreams are made up! There's nothing you can do!

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



I just wanna wake up in the morning and look over and see my husband asleep on our neighbor's roof.

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



stuart scott posted:

if you're ever trying to remember a full quote i made a search engine for this sort of thing -- https://funcooker.fun

You are the best. I love this.

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Five inches, but it's thick.

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



I'm gonna make you a mixtape. You like Phil Collins?

I have two ears and a heart, don't I?

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



She is ... staunchly in favor of Cocoa Puffs.

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



I don't vote Republican or Democrat. Choosing is a sin, so I just write in the Lord's name.

Those are Republican, we count those.

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



ninjahedgehog posted:

Are you drunk?

On the Spirit of Christmas! It's this cheap high-proof brandy I found.

The longing look she gives the bottle has stayed with me for years, it's just so funny

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Give up like you gave up on your relationship with David Blaine?

He's the one who drove the wedge! With his magic!

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Happy Valentine's Day ... no one.

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Grizz, Dotcom, thank you for pretending to be bouncers.

Maybe someday we'll live in a world where you ask us to pretend to be scientists.

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



We KNOW what art is. IT'S PAINTINGS OF HORSES

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Well, it's only positive reinforcement when they say it to you. In my case they're just stating the facts. I do look like the Arrow shirt man, I did lace up my shoes professionally and I did do a fabulous job finishing my muffin.

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



IF IT'S A BLONDE, I WILL KILL MYSELF!

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Kenneth, a word?

Balloon!!!

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



which one is rich dude

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



theflyingexecutive posted:

You wanna go to Vegas and buy a bunch of sarcophagi?

Nah, I don't even use the ones I have.

that Tracy has been like this since season one, what a gift

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Never follow a hippie to a second location

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



GO JUMP UP YOUR MOTHER

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Let's not do this, Elizabeth.

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Harlem Globetrotter. Does that name mean NOTHING to you?

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Jerusalem posted:

Just watched the season 5 episode where Liz and Jack accidentally get married and I gotta say it was genuinely heartwarming watching their faces as Weinerslav listed all the signs of a workplace relationship/partnership.

On rewatch it's fun how Colleen immediately thinks Liz is perfect for Jack and treats his other partners with contempt forever. They're platonic soulmates! It's not only possible but desirable! Even for annoying people!

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



It's a shame because the line delivery would have been perfectly adequate payoff

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Secret plan!!!

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Grassy Knowles posted:

Oh no, my period!

Chocolate chocolate chocolate! Ack!

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



potee posted:

GE could never make something so... unique. We'll have to pass this off to one of our subsidiaries. You see, GE owns KitchenAll of Colorado, which in turn owns JMI of Stamford, which is a majority shareholder of Pokerfastlane.com, which recently acquired the Sheinhardt Wig Company which owns NBC outright. NBC owns Winnipeg Iron Works which owns the AHP Chanagi Party Meats company of Pyongyang, North Korea, and they will make the Meat Machine.

An incredible glimpse into the future of private equity

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Dot Com, this need you have to be the smartest guy in the room is ... off-putting.

I guess that's why I'm still single. :(

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011




"The lack of oxygen is making me orgasm!" is so goddamn funny

Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



chocolate chocolate chocolate gahhhh

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Doc Fission
Sep 11, 2011



Did you just try to control my body with your white hand?

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