|
When did old Bob Dunston swallow all this change?
|
#
¿
Feb 9, 2023 14:37
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 22, 2024 09:54 |
|
|
Dear Liz Lemon: While other women have bigger boobs than you, no other woman has as big a heart. When I saw you getting ready to go out and get nailed by a bunch of guys last night, I knew for sure it was over between us, and for the first time since the '86 World Series, I cried... I cried like a big, dumb homo. And if it was up to me, we'd be together forever. But there's a new thing called "women's liberation", which gives you women the right to choose and you have chosen to abort me, and that I must live with. So tonight, when you arrive home, I'll be gone. I officially renounce my squatter's rights.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 9, 2023 15:53
|
|
|
I'm looking for D.I.H.C Avery, and I'm going to take it wherever I can find it.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 9, 2023 16:09
|
|
|
Wanting to be with a woman? How gay is that? You win sex against a man. That’s as straight as it gets.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 9, 2023 20:50
|
|
|
Look, Liz Lemon. I know your feelings are hurt. But parties are like frisbees. If you throw them the wrong way, they'll veer off in a bad direction. And then your kid will fall into a quarry. Don't throw a party for vengeance. It will turn on you. Like your wife, after your kid has fallen into a quarry.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 9, 2023 20:56
|
|
|
I... am a protein. All living organisms need me to function. A basic building block of the human body, I'm made from amino acids found in ribosomes. Proteins give energy to everything from flower and butterflies to heroes who turn in Communists. I am a protein. (I legit get teary eyed every time I watch this episode. Alec Baldwin is a great actor/accidental murderer)
|
|
#
¿
Feb 9, 2023 21:06
|
|
|
Randy's gay everyone! He's gay!
|
|
#
¿
Feb 9, 2023 22:04
|
|
|
THE G TRAIN NERMAL
|
|
#
¿
Feb 9, 2023 22:35
|
|
|
Lemon. Lesbian. Frankenstein. Wants. Her. Shoes. Back.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 10, 2023 00:43
|
|
|
Look how Greenzo's testing. They love him in every demographic: colored people, broads, fairies, commies... gosh, we've gotta update these forms.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 10, 2023 17:48
|
|
|
You and this gravy face have slarneyed up a real donnybrook!
|
|
#
¿
Feb 11, 2023 01:14
|
|
|
I have to find my bliss, which for once is not an acronym for Beautiful Ladies In Short Shorts.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 12, 2023 07:24
|
|
|
They used to call me 'The Chameleon'... because of my slender frame and big, wet eyes.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 12, 2023 19:16
|
|
|
My dear friend, the deep-sea explorer, Bob Ballard, brought over a 2,000-year-old amphora of wine from a sunken Phoenician trading vessel. The wine turned out to be quite toxic. My guests and I spent the stroke of midnight in my garden vomiting. The whole night, purging. The New Year, the vivid hallucinations of Astarte, the Phoenician Goddess of Sex and War, it all wiped the slate clean.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 13, 2023 02:02
|
|
|
Dick, listen. Tricia told me you're married. I know men are meant to be promiscuous because of evolution, but you made a commitment to a woman you love.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 14, 2023 22:12
|
|
|
Remember when a movie was just a fella with a hat running from a fella with no hair?
|
|
#
¿
Feb 15, 2023 17:24
|
|
|
Hughmoris posted:Dotcom, this need you have to be the smartest guy in the room is... off-putting. I guess that's why I'm still single 
|
|
#
¿
Feb 16, 2023 17:33
|
|
|
It's not what you think. It's something I need to wear to support my breasts.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 18, 2023 01:03
|
|
|
The Cubans in the south... Very conservative. I had a lot of expensive cigars put out on me in Miami comedy clubs. But central Florida is dominated by Jewish retirees, serial killers, and secretly gay Disney princes, all of whom love Obama.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 18, 2023 17:17
|
|
|
I'll tell you why! Because for seven years, you have yelled at me and turned the lights out on me when I was in the bathroom and written on me while I was sleeping, 'cause I was Lutz... Dumb, old, uncool, part-inuit, bisexual, 51-year-old Lutz! Well, today I am the picker! And I want you to feel what I felt for the last seven years... Anger and disappointment and regret! And when that sandwich slides out of you in a week, look at it, because that is Lutz's revenge! Cerie, for lunch today, I would like to pick Blimpie's.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 23, 2023 23:14
|
|
|
Lemon, let me tell you a little story. It was 1994, and I was ice climbing when I fell into a crevasse and hurt my leg. There was only one way out, so fighting every natural instinct I have, I did the thing I hated the most. I climbed down into the darkness. And when I came back to camp, I went to the person who cut my line and said, "Connie Chung, you did the right thing."
|
|
#
¿
Feb 25, 2023 21:03
|
|
|
Why isn't there any good art in here?!
|
|
#
¿
Feb 26, 2023 00:54
|
|
|
That dude did it!
|
|
#
¿
Feb 26, 2023 17:22
|
|
|
Hey! I am wanting the foods! Very good. Very nice.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 1, 2023 21:42
|
|
|
I never thought I'd feel sorry for a guy with a tattoo of a leprechaun vomiting on a book
|
|
#
¿
Mar 2, 2023 17:47
|
|
|
Lemon, what happened in your childhood to make you believe that people are good?
|
|
#
¿
Mar 5, 2023 02:38
|
|
|
A guy crying about a chicken and a baby? I thought this was a comedy show.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 9, 2023 23:09
|
|
|
Mediation is a binding form of non-judicial dispute resolution. I watched "Boston Legal" nine times before I realized it wasn't a new "Star Trek."
|
|
#
¿
Mar 12, 2023 16:11
|
|
|
Wow, it's just good to be, uh, Lance Drake Mandrell again. Get back to doing the things I love, like getting high and going to the planetarium.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 24, 2023 22:48
|
|
|
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the bravest New Yorker since Bernie Goetz, Mr. Dennis Duffy.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 25, 2023 02:05
|
|
|
Don't listen to him! We fell for his lies 300 years ago. Don't let this slave-owning time-traveler fool us again!
|
|
#
¿
Mar 31, 2023 01:22
|
|
|
Davros1 posted:The annual "TGS" viewer walk-on contest. It's great promotion, Lemon. We found that if someone is actually on NBC, they're 4% more likely to watch it. I will not be spoken to this way, I am a contest winner!
|
|
#
¿
Apr 21, 2023 16:48
|
|
|
DrBouvenstein posted:How many guys out there have a fully loaded Toyota Tercel? Donnnn-nnnnaaaaaaaaa Struck!
|
|
#
¿
Jun 28, 2023 22:42
|
|
|
The Donaghys originally come from Ireland's little known county Steve, where, historically, we were whiskey testers and goblins.
|
|
#
¿
Jul 14, 2023 16:39
|
|
|
Why don't you come back home to TGS and pick the peas out of my fried rice? And the rice. I just want carrots.
|
|
#
¿
Aug 31, 2023 01:41
|
|
|
Irish pride! Go, Celtics! Celtics suck. Go, Knicks!
|
|
#
¿
Sep 13, 2023 23:42
|
|
|
Everyone knows Fat Bitch died at the end.
|
|
#
¿
Oct 6, 2023 00:54
|
|
|
A number of minor character actors from 30 Rock show up across various episodes of Only Murders In The Building, one of which was the lady who played Dr. Drew's "mother" and of course all I could think was You have to tell him or I won't get into Heaven.
|
|
#
¿
Oct 6, 2023 03:44
|
|
|
Quiet! Mankind is trying to tweet about these clowns in Congress.
ONE YEAR LATER fucked around with this message at 04:01 on Oct 21, 2023 |
|
#
¿
Oct 21, 2023 03:58
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 22, 2024 09:54 |
|
|
I was watching TV, and they started interviewing an Asian Santa claus, - and my arm went numb.
|
|
#
¿
Dec 7, 2023 17:21
|
|