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I order your meal for you. The steak for me and the side salad can be given to my handsome companion. We will stick with the waters, thank you.
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Feb 9, 2023 19:30
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Show all the times I've been emptyquoted
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Feb 9, 2023 19:34
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Those are MY clam strips. 
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Feb 9, 2023 19:35
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Flash the Ridge Wallet
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Feb 9, 2023 19:42
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grab the steak knife and play the 'knife game' with your hand on the table, making sure to maintain eye contact and not flinch when you inevitably stab your fingers
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Feb 9, 2023 19:45
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One time i was at the renn fair and i paid 3 whole dollars to whip rotten fruit at the tomato jester and i hit him square in the schnoz on the last throw. The tomato exploded on impact. My date didnt see it because she was shopping in the store across from the tomato guy Well thats my story bye
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Feb 9, 2023 19:46
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If things are not going well I might suddenly grab my date's nose and say "Bad date" like the guy in indiana jones
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Feb 9, 2023 19:49
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let me tell you about teh mighty dump i took a few days ago
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Feb 9, 2023 20:00
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*coming back from bathroom, sweaty and out of breath* woof! sorry that took so long, was a real piece of work jamming that vein back up inside, but i got that sucker! you know, my doctor told me the hemmerhoids are so severe that most people would have gotten surgery years... where are you going?
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Feb 9, 2023 20:04
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i can spit really far, would you like to see?
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Feb 9, 2023 20:07
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present your swollen red bottom and aggressively attack other nearby males while hooting and baring your teeth
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Feb 9, 2023 20:08
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constantly touching them on the shoulder to fill the kino meter
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Feb 9, 2023 20:11
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pin, submit, and make love to the largest man you can find showing your strength
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Feb 9, 2023 20:14
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I impress my date by showing what a good father I am and giving my baby alcohol
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Feb 9, 2023 20:14
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I own a pug. That's usually enough.
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Feb 9, 2023 20:17
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The kind of person who will go on a date with me is usually impressed by my store-bought shoes
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Feb 9, 2023 20:17
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Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:I impress my date by showing what a good father I am and giving my baby alcohol Your baby is a good drinker
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Feb 9, 2023 20:18
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Nigmaetcetera posted:I own a pug. That's usually enough. This is pretty much S tier
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Feb 9, 2023 20:18
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Nooner posted:This is pretty much S tier I didn't even get her for that it's making me uncomfortable oh well
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Feb 9, 2023 20:19
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bring a print out of your call of duty kd ratio and most used weapons
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Feb 9, 2023 20:21
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Every time you sit down say “YEOWCH MY BALLS!”
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Feb 9, 2023 20:26
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I once told a date she was boring and walked out.
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Feb 9, 2023 20:30
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Hey babe, would you like to see the world's smallest penis?
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Feb 9, 2023 20:44
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We compare switchblades then elope.
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Feb 9, 2023 20:52
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tell them about my multiple max level world of warcraft characters
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Feb 9, 2023 20:55
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"Look, I know it's not as big as Kirk Johnson's, but you gotta admit it's still pretty big, right?"
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Feb 9, 2023 20:56
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Nothing says impressive like a sick nunchuck kata.
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Feb 9, 2023 20:58
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Ask for sugar packets and lemon wedges to prepare a free and refreshing lemonade for your date.
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Feb 9, 2023 21:00
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Smugworth posted:Show all the times I've been emptyquoted
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Feb 9, 2023 21:16
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Ask them to bring all their unfinished crossword puzzles and finish all of them right in front of your date at the dinner table.
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Feb 9, 2023 21:18
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Give your date whatever cash you were going to tip the server.
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Feb 9, 2023 21:19
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order ribs with a bowl of spagetthi on the side. Decline silverware. Insist on sharing.
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Feb 9, 2023 21:29
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BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:Ask for sugar packets and lemon wedges to prepare a free and refreshing lemonade for your date. lol
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Feb 9, 2023 22:25
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see all this hair? it's real! crazy, right?
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Feb 9, 2023 22:37
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Wanna come in? I'd love to show you my gaming rig
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Feb 9, 2023 22:49
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*belches the entirety of the Animaniacs theme song*
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Feb 9, 2023 22:50
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*pulls Nintendo Switch OLED from Patagonia satchel*
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Feb 9, 2023 22:51
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So then I just started banning them one by one. Personally I hate to use my authority unless it's absolutely necessary but you know what they say "You gently caress with the bull, you get the horns".
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Feb 9, 2023 22:52
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Mr. Meagles posted:present your swollen red bottom and aggressively attack other nearby males while hooting and baring your teeth This is why you never get laid. Everyone thinks your huge red swollen rear end is gross. Stop trying to use it as mating display thing. Just stick with the classics. Hoot, howl, give them the threat teeth. Hit your chest a bit, do a bluff charge at the beta male. If he wants to go, rip his jaw off and throw it at the female's feet after your pummel him to death. You kids don't know how to run a tribe anymore.
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Feb 9, 2023 22:52
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| # ? May 10, 2024 00:35 |
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flubber nuts posted:i can spit really far, would you like to see? have you seen someone demonstrate the talent known as "gleeking"?
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Feb 9, 2023 22:53
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