Who Threadglightninged 2023: The Delay of Destiny

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Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Hurt wasn�t his last name. It was a threat.

# ¿ Feb 15, 2023 03:20

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# ¿ May 9, 2024 21:43

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

My knowledge of D&D is limited, but even I know that it�s not really a D&D movie without a gelatinous cube.

And I saw one in that trailer, so, uh�.so far so good?

# ¿ Feb 21, 2023 08:33

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Prologue is the climbing accident that killed his mom and dad. It's all quicktime events that you can't win.

# ¿ Mar 20, 2023 10:02

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

James Bond is fuckin� DEAD. I watched him get blown up into a million pieces by surface to surface missiles. That should be the last 007 movie.

# ¿ Apr 23, 2023 11:09

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

All glory to the Zardozverse.

# ¿ Apr 23, 2023 12:10

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Michael Bay asking an AI to create a movie would result in more batshittery than usual.

# ¿ Apr 26, 2023 02:53

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

The Creepers had better be voiced by Harry Peacock.

Throw in Richard Ayoade, too.

# ¿ May 24, 2023 08:08

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

It should�ve been robot skeletons from the get go.

Robot skeletons can't be bargained with. Robot skeletons can't be reasoned with. Robot skeletons don�t feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And robot skeletons absolutely will not stop... ever, until you are dead.

# ¿ May 31, 2023 10:13

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Grendels Dad posted:

Something something, magnetic interference caused by unobtanium fields, turning your army of robot skeletons into a giant ball a la Katamari Damacy.

Even then, such a visual spectacle would�ve been box office gold!

# ¿ May 31, 2023 10:26

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Non Compos Mentis posted:

The only thing that can stop a robot skeleton is a human skeleton or perhaps a bear skeleton

# ¿ May 31, 2023 10:27

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Finally, a possible answer to the question �Can a TV show or movie make negative money?�.

# ¿ Jul 23, 2023 09:38

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

In which Henry Cavill livestreams himself and Vin Diesel being sci-fi nerds and building a high end gaming rig from scratch.

Cavill explaining to Diesel in great detail about the differences between certain thermal pastes.

# ¿ Aug 24, 2023 02:55

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Maxwell Lord posted:

Space Opera is built on ripoffs. Star Wars ripped off Flash Gordon which ripped off John Carter which ripped off, I dunno, Hercules or some poo poo but on Mars

Star Wars ripped off Dune which ripped off Isaac Asmiov�s Foundation series from the 50�s which ripped off John Carter from decades earlier.

Warhammer 40K ripped off all of those things.

# ¿ Aug 24, 2023 02:58

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

In terms of Arnold and Sly 80�s/90�s movies, my favorite Arnold movie of that era is The Running Man, and my favorite Stallone movie of that era is Demolition Man.

I shall not be taking further questions at this time. Thank you.

# ¿ Oct 25, 2023 07:13

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

1995 Dredd certainly isn�t the worst. The set design and costuming is really great. But a PG-13 Judge Dredd movie was doomed from the start. Though �95 Dredd has some wonderful quotes/lines.

Karl Urban�s Dredd is the definitive Dredd.

The Sixth Day is hilarious. The first time I ever saw it, I was on the old Route 66 driving to Arizona from Michigan (was in the process of moving to metro Phoenix), and there was a huge dust storm/thunderstorm rolling into the small town I stopped to get gas in, and some random family of like 8 people who owned the gas station invited me to wait it out at their Texas Chainsaw Massacre-lookin� house down the street.

It was a coin flip as to whether or not they were going to kill me. But instead they fed me dinner and I watched The Sixth Day with their high school age kids on the TV in the living room. I think it was on TBS, so it was edited, but holy crap was it ever bad.

# ¿ Oct 25, 2023 07:24

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Bloodsport, Universal Soldier, Hard Target and Timecop were bangers. 80�s and 90�s Van Damme was terrific.

And who could forget Sudden Death, in which he stops terrorism by playing goal in an NHL game?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=swEgflM5Ol4

# ¿ Oct 25, 2023 07:36

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Big Mean Jerk posted:

00s-Present Cruise has way more of an argument for Action Rushmore than 80s/90s Cruise, that spot could easily go to Lundgren or Van Damme.

Yeah, Cruise didn�t really become Action God until after M:I 2 came out in 2000. The last 23 years for Tom Cruise has cemented him as one of the best action stars of the era, if not the best of said era. He�s also one of the last true Movie Stars� left, insofar as his name can drive ticket sales.

# ¿ Oct 25, 2023 07:45

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

With regards to Theron, Atomic Blonde remains one of the best action movies of the last 20 years, IMO. The unbroken shot fight scene in the apartment building was/is supremely impressive.

Edit:

This.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CrPDTalA1Lc

Gonz fucked around with this message at 11:30 on Oct 25, 2023

# ¿ Oct 25, 2023 07:55

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Grendels Dad posted:

He certainly did alot of running even in the 80's and 90's but yeah, I remember him more as starring in thrillers and dramas.

Yep; inbetween Top Gun and Mission Impossible (1986-1996), he did the following:

The Color of Money
Cocktail
Born on the Fourth of July
Rainman
Far and Away
A Few Good Men
The Firm
Interview With The Vampire

And then between Mission Impossible (1996; which had great action in it, but was more of a mystery/thriller than an action movie) and Mission Impossible 2 (2000), he did:

Jerry Maguire
Without Limits
Eyes Wide Shut
Magnolia

Then post 2000, especially after Minority Report in 2002, his action catalog really starts picking up steam.

# ¿ Oct 25, 2023 08:02

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Timby posted:

You missed Days of Thunder, AKA "Top Gun, but NASCAR."

Ah poo poo you�re right!

# ¿ Oct 25, 2023 08:29

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

I stand corrected! I could�ve sworn it was PG-13.

But looking back, yeah, the violence was definitely R-rated. Yet the most gruesome stuff was just off-screen (i.e. the ABC robot ripping Jurgen Prochnow apart).

# ¿ Oct 25, 2023 12:34

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

We will never get the Nick Cave script turned into a movie because Hollywood is, indeed, rife with cowardice.

# ¿ Nov 6, 2023 23:54

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

The soundtrack is probably gonna go real goddamn hard.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5WrgY2O6xHE

# ¿ Nov 8, 2023 07:57

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Goddamnit, Hollywood. Just give me the Metal gear Solid movie(s) i've been craving for decades.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eULR8z5ZJK4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZfKA4b5SFq4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I8pg2XoQTlA

# ¿ Nov 8, 2023 08:06

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

�Where we�re going, we won�t need eyes to see.�

# ¿ Nov 13, 2023 23:56

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

dr_rat posted:

The production design on event horizon was just great. Incredibly over the top and a better movie for it.

Love the random walkway through a hallway of rotating blades for like literally no explained reasons. Absolutely Perfect. no notes.

I could be wrong, but I seem to recall the hallway �o blades having something to do with protecting the rest of the ship/umbilicus from gravitational distortions created by the core.

# ¿ Nov 14, 2023 00:00

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Codependent Poster posted:

I didn't know that about Event Horizon but that fits and is cool as hell.

I also appreciate the movie for having a smart captain. As soon as he sees that tape he's getting everyone off the ship and blowing it up. No hesitation, no arguing.

# ¿ Nov 14, 2023 07:06

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

I have.

I wish I hadn�t.

It is truly incredible that they were able to turn one book into nearly 8 hours worth of films.

# ¿ Nov 17, 2023 09:09

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Snoop and Willie Nelson will actually drop dead if they stop smoking weed.

There is no way Snoop stopped smoking weed. It has to be a ruse of some sort. Or maybe he invented some sort of bizarro weed that gives you the same sensations, but in carbonated liquid form.

The anti-energy drink.

# ¿ Nov 18, 2023 10:10

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Grendels Dad posted:

The fifth army is the audience struggling to make it to the end of the movie.

The whole Fifth Army was standing just out of frame, laughing.

# ¿ Nov 18, 2023 10:11

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

If Willie had a Viking funeral, everyone in attendance would ascend to another plane of existence outside of normal spacetime.

# ¿ Nov 18, 2023 10:17

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

It�s gonna do gangbusters. People like Reynolds as Deadpool and Jackman as Wolverine. The icing on the cake will be all the alleged Fox X-Men actors that are supposed to be in it, and get brutally killed.

# ¿ Nov 20, 2023 06:18

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Internet says that Free Guy made 331 million bucks and a sequel is in the works.

# ¿ Nov 20, 2023 08:09

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

She�s lying. She�s never gonna watch that movie. Honestly, I don�t blame her.

# ¿ Feb 16, 2024 11:00

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

FlamingLiberal posted:

Sony agrees to screen it for her, but only as part of a double feature with Morbius

# ¿ Feb 16, 2024 12:42

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

I love Hot Rod.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TOUrLn1FFCA

# ¿ Feb 29, 2024 02:53

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

The Pop-Tart film had better include this scene.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZ6HoJdHslI

# ¿ Mar 9, 2024 10:11

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

We should all be so lucky as to witness a legion of ABC Warriors taking to the battlefields of WW3.

# ¿ Mar 18, 2024 07:29

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Alan Smithee posted:

Make it 2025 we just talk about fake movies

Can you believe they�re making a Frighteners prequel, directed by David Lynch?

Fuckin� wild stuff.

# ¿ Mar 18, 2024 07:33

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# ¿ May 9, 2024 21:43

Gonz: Dec 22, 2009; "Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

C.R.E.A.M. by the Wu-Tang Clan.

# ¿ Apr 11, 2024 07:42

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > Cinema Discusso > Who Threadglightninged 2023: The Delay of Destiny

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