BYOB Taskmaster IS CONCLUDED FOR 2023, Congratulations To The Winners!

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > BYOB Taskmaster IS CONCLUDED FOR 2023, Congratulations To The Winners!

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Manifisto

Welcome to BYOB Taskmaster!

***TODAY IS THE FINALE OF TASKMASTER! THE FINAL TASK IS CLOSED AND AWAITING JUDGING.***
Links:
Task 1 Task 1 Scores
Task 2 Continuation of Task 2 Task 2 Scores
Task 3 Task 3 Scores
Task 4 Task 4 Scores
Task 5 Task 5 Scores
Secret Task 1 Scores
Task 6 Task 6 Scores
Task 7 Task 7 Scores
Task 8 Task 8 Scores
Task 9 Task 9 Judging
Task 10 Task 10 Judging
Task 11 Task 11 Judging
Task 12 Continuation of Task 12 Task 12 Judging
Task 13

Inspired by the British TV game show of the same name, for the next few days, we will be challenging BYOB with a series of arbitrary, really mostly rather silly and pointless, tasks, for which I and my colleagues will judge you mercilessly! Anyone can participate in any or all of the tasks, and your entries will be awarded from zero to five points in the unimpeachable discretion of whoever is judging the task. Whoever collects the most points by the end of the competition (on Sunday) wins first place!

The first place winner will receive their choice of forums upgrade, a special gang tag that only the winner is allowed to use, and best of all this lovely golden trophy:

Second and third place winners will be awarded their choice of forums upgrade. And everyone who has participated in at least one task is eligible for a taskmaster participant gang tag! Also there is a limited supply of extra-special bonus prizes for participants, to be revealed at some suitably dramatic moment!!

The official rules will be listed in the next post. For now, please be aware that the first official task will be revealed today at 10:00AM Eastern time (all times will be listed in Eastern time for consistency, please convert to your local time!).

And don't be surprised when, in the coming days, some special GUEST JUDGES introduce themselves! While Goatse and Gallant and myself will be judging some of the tasks, we have called for reinforcements from people with arguably much better taste!! (However, they did agree to be guest judges, so how good can their taste be, really?)

Finally, a little note. If you have ever seen the show (or its brethren from Australia and/or New Zealand), you will be aware that the judging of the tasks is often arbitrary, unfair, and frankly rather salty. So don't be surprised if you see some mild trash-talking, it's done without malice and in the name of a fun competition. Feel free to give it back! Keeping in mind that your scores are completely in the hands of the judges . . .

Manifisto fucked around with this message at 00:04 on Feb 27, 2023

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Feb 22, 2023 13:15

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# ? Apr 27, 2024 11:16

Manifisto

Official Rules:

Any SA forum user can participate in any task (although there may be a few "secret" tasks that you will only know about if you have signed up in advance). You can participate in as many or as few tasks as you please, however, the more tasks you participate in, the greater your chances of winning!
Tasks are judged on a scale of 1 to 5 points, or zero points if, in the opinion of the judge, you somehow failed to complete the task correctly (for example, you broke a rule in the task). Scores are entirely at the discretion of the judge, who may be as arbitrary as they like. This is for funsies!
Highest score at the end of the competition wins. If there is more than one person with the same high score, there will be a run-off to determine the final winner. There will be only one first place!
For each task, the judge will specify the deadline as well as how entries are to be submitted. For some tasks, entries can be posted in the official thread as soon as they are completed; some should not be posted before a particular deadline; and some should be submitted directly to the judge. Please pay attention to how you are supposed to submit your task, failing to abide by this may earn you zero points!
READ THE TASK! As Alex likes to say, "everything you need to know is in the task."
It is not a requirement that anyone buy anything or spend any money out of pocket to do any task. Use what's available to you. Also, it is not a requirement that anyone show their face or do anything to doxx themselves. Please use ordinary caution, and for photos/videos, it is suggested that you strip any metadata (especially location metadata) that might identify you, if that is sensitive to you.
The judges and mods reserve the right to disqualify and/or delete entries that violate forum rules (both BYOB and the forum as a whole) or are contrary to the spirit of the game.

# ? Feb 22, 2023 13:26

Rarity: ~*4 LIFE*~

I'm Aisling Bea and I'm in it to win it. Now when do I take my knickers off?

Rarity fucked around with this message at 13:38 on Feb 22, 2023

_{I'm a pretty pony! Sig credits: How Wonderful!, Heather Papps, MAP20 Gotcha, Plant MONSTER.}

# ? Feb 22, 2023 13:31

Manifisto

Rarity posted:

I'm Aisling Bea and I'm in it to win it. Now when do I take my knickers off?

*the judges huddle together, making concerned noises*

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Feb 22, 2023 13:56

Rarity: ~*4 LIFE*~

Manifisto posted:

*the judges huddle together, making concerned noises*

This is like that bit in the Hunger Games where Katniss thinks she's hosed it but then she gets top marks

_{I'm a pretty pony! Sig credits: How Wonderful!, Heather Papps, MAP20 Gotcha, Plant MONSTER.}

# ? Feb 22, 2023 13:58

Dumb Sex-Parrot

Good luck to all the other competitors, you're gonna need it! :devil:

thank you Saoshyantx4, Plant MONSTER. and deep dish peat moss for the excellent signature

# ? Feb 22, 2023 14:10

Manifisto

Good morning my fine and excellent orbs! Who's ready for some tasks?

I think the general idea has been conveyed, but to reiterate, this is all about doing your best with what you've got in the time allotted--which you may find rather short in some cases! But pretty much any entry is better than no entry, because most entries will earn you points unless you really, really screw something up. Please read the tasks carefully, they will contain important information about how and when your responses are to be submitted, which may vary from task to task.

TASK 1

Bring me the most haunted nautical object or image! You have until 12:00 noon EST (that's two hours from now) to post an image ITT that is your candidate for most haunted. PLEASE INCLUDE THE WORDS "OFFICIAL SUBMISSION" IN YOUR ENTRY POST to help us resolve any ambiguities (only one submission per player, please). Your time starts . . . now!!

# ? Feb 22, 2023 15:58

Viginti Septem: Oculus Noctuae

Did we ever discuss how often tasks will be posted?

https://i.imgur.com/9jTkSUL.mp4
Thanks to vanisher for the paradise sig!

# ? Feb 22, 2023 16:14

Dumb Sex-Parrot

OFFICIAL SUBMISSION

thank you Saoshyantx4, Plant MONSTER. and deep dish peat moss for the excellent signature

# ? Feb 22, 2023 16:15

Manifisto

Viginti Septem posted:

Did we ever discuss how often tasks will be posted?

no, but I'll be happy to give some guidance! there will be several tasks per day, somewhere between two and four. most tasks will leave at least an hour for completion, preferably more (there may be a very few lightning round exceptions). tasks will probably not be posted before 10:00am eastern each day. a few tasks which may be slightly more involved will probably go on overnight. we will try our best to keep it clear what the next thing coming up will be, whether it is a deadline/judging or the announcement of a new task.

# ? Feb 22, 2023 16:20

Manifisto

Dumb Sex-Parrot posted:

OFFICIAL SUBMISSION

and we're off to a very promising start!!

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Feb 22, 2023 16:20

Saoshyant

Task 1 OFFICIAL SUBMISSION

The Glass Squid, a species that resemble undersea alien ghosts.

^{awesome spring sig by RavenousScoot}

# ? Feb 22, 2023 16:30

Manifisto

Saoshyant posted:

The Glass Squid, a species that resemble undersea alien ghosts.

did you bring enough for the entire class?

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Feb 22, 2023 16:35

your friend sk: (ヤイケス!)

OFFICIAL SUBMISSION

I 100% forget why and where I took this

e: I should say, I was definitely in a boat

your friend sk fucked around with this message at 17:10 on Feb 22, 2023

Join the BYOB Army

^{thank you again Saoshyant!!}

# ? Feb 22, 2023 16:35

Tiny Myers: say hello to my little friend

Task 1 OFFICIAL SUBMISSION

I present to you: tiny silicone mermaid fetuses in thermoplastic shark egg cases (colloquially known as "mermaid's purses"). Courtesy of Etsy. :hai:

edit: Removed the additional images since I missed that you're only supposed to submit one (1) image, oops.

Tiny Myers fucked around with this message at 16:39 on Feb 22, 2023

Thank you How Wonderful! for the autumn sig!

# ? Feb 22, 2023 16:36

Rarity: ~*4 LIFE*~

Manifisto posted:

no, but I'll be happy to give some guidance! there will be several tasks per day, somewhere between two and four. most tasks will leave at least an hour for completion, preferably more (there may be a very few lightning round exceptions). tasks will probably not be posted before 10:00am eastern each day. a few tasks which may be slightly more involved will probably go on overnight. we will try our best to keep it clear what the next thing coming up will be, whether it is a deadline/judging or the announcement of a new task.

Oh no is being on GMT gonna gently caress me over? :ohdear:

_{I'm a pretty pony! Sig credits: How Wonderful!, Heather Papps, MAP20 Gotcha, Plant MONSTER.}

# ? Feb 22, 2023 16:41

Saoshyant

Manifisto posted:

did you bring enough for the entire class?

It's not as spooky if there's an army of them :hai:

^{awesome spring sig by RavenousScoot}

# ? Feb 22, 2023 16:43

biosterous

task 1 OFFICIAL SUBMISSION

the wreck of the titanic is pretty fuckin haunted

"bios, is this your image?"

listen it was a .avif when i found it online and wtf is that format, i converted it to .png all by myself, therefore i have created this file

^{^{thank you saoshyant for this sig!!!}}
^{^{gallery of sigs}}

he/him

# ? Feb 22, 2023 16:44

Manifisto

Rarity posted:

Oh no is being on GMT gonna gently caress me over?

I hope not! we have tried to balance the times as best we can with the pacific coast folks being earlier and the trans-atlantic folks being later. folks on japan/australia time are kinda screwed and I'm sorry about that. longer tasks being overnight is designed to give most people a few hours in their normal working day to address the task, hopefully. we will be looking for feedback about time frames (was the amount of time right for each task, were the time frames acceptable to people in various time zones) to help inform any future versions of this or similar competitions.

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Feb 22, 2023 16:47

Saoshyant

biosterous posted:

listen it was a .avif when i found it online and wtf is that format

That's the future of online video and images, buddy! Don't go back to your web 1.0 ways!

^{awesome spring sig by RavenousScoot}

# ? Feb 22, 2023 16:55

barnold: what do u do when yuo're born to play fps? guess there's nothing left to do but play fps. boom headshot

OFFICIAL SUBMISSION

presented for the approval of the midnight society is a Royal Navy Hammock Cat. now what is so spooky or haunted about a bunch of sailors and a cat in a hammock you might ask? well let the truth be revealed - these souls are aboard the HMS Hermione, which was fatefully struck by a torpedo on June 16, 1942 and sank to the depths of the Mediterranean Sea, killing 88 men 🙀

# ? Feb 22, 2023 16:58

Stoner Sloth

am hoping that 'haunted' doesn't have to mean supernatural!

OFFICIAL SUBMISSION

This is the last known footage of the Lusitania, one of the great Olympic class vessels of the Cunard line. On the 7th of May, 1915, she was nearing Liverpool travelling from New York with 1266 passengers and 696 crew aboard when the German U-Boat, U-20, fired a single torpedo into the starboard bow just beneath the wheelhouse. Within moments a second explosion occurred and the ship began to founder and list to the starboard side.

The crew quickly scrambled to launch the lifeboats but the extreme list and circumstances aboard the vessel meant that only 6 out of the 48 life boats on board were able to be launched. 18 minutes after the ship was struck she went under, the tall funnels and masts being the last to disappear below the waves. Of the 1962 passengers and crew aboard 1198 lost their lives. A further 3 would go on to perish from their injuries.

Sadly this was just a preview of the tragedies to come, the sinking of the Lusitania started a growing movement to intervene in the war in Europe and led directly to the US joining the first world war two years later after supported had reached critical levels stemming from the outrage of this act. Not only can a direct line be drawn between this photo and the loss of 1,201 of those who travelled aboard but also in a very real sense between all the lives lost by and to US forces in WW1.

Moreover the peace that would follow, in the shadow of the punitive Treaty of Versailles, would lead directly to the even greater horrors of World War Two and presaged US involvement both in that and in the Cold War that lay beyond it. This photo then represents the ghosts of those who perished in a century of horrors - this last moment of innocent naivete, gilded and extravagant privilege, and blissful, optimistic ignorance of a lost age. All too soon to be washed away and submerged beneath a tidal wave of blood and suffering which had no equal in human history.

If any picture can be said to be haunted, or haunting, it is this one. Thank you for your consideration of this entry.

# ? Feb 22, 2023 16:58

Charles Bukowski: Taskmaster 2023 Second Place Winner

I humbly submit a haunted sextant that sleeps in a coffin.

Boats and ships can be crewed by monkeys, but only a trained nautical sailor can use a sextant. Therefore it is the most nautical device, and ebay promised me it was haunted.

e: I was absolutely asleep when this happened, but is good motivation to he up at a proper hour I suppose. Pacific time woo.

Thank you Saoshyant for the lovely signature.

# ? Feb 22, 2023 17:01

Rarity: ~*4 LIFE*~

Lol I hit post by mistake

_{I'm a pretty pony! Sig credits: How Wonderful!, Heather Papps, MAP20 Gotcha, Plant MONSTER.}

# ? Feb 22, 2023 17:24

Viginti Septem: Oculus Noctuae

https://i.imgur.com/9jTkSUL.mp4
Thanks to vanisher for the paradise sig!

# ? Feb 22, 2023 17:34

Quadramind

OFFICIAL SUBMISSION

# ? Feb 22, 2023 17:35

Rarity: ~*4 LIFE*~

OFFICIAL SUBMISSION

This is Chuuk Lagoon, the world's largest underwater graveyard. It is the resting place for 60 ships, 275 aircraft and thousands of people with human remains littering the floor. In 1944 this was the site of Operation Hailstone, an Allied offensive on a Japanese airbase that claimed the lives of over 3000 people.

Also this is the only image with actual ghosts :colbert:

_{I'm a pretty pony! Sig credits: How Wonderful!, Heather Papps, MAP20 Gotcha, Plant MONSTER.}

# ? Feb 22, 2023 17:46

Viginti Septem: Oculus Noctuae

https://i.imgur.com/9jTkSUL.mp4
Thanks to vanisher for the paradise sig!

# ? Feb 22, 2023 17:52

Manifisto

five-ish minutes to go, there's still time to get an entry in under the wire!!

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Feb 22, 2023 17:53

Finger Prince

OFFICIAL SUBMISSION

This fine lady does ghost tours of the canals and nautical areas of Duluth. She is haunted forever by the ghost of a taxi she can see but is unable to hail.

# ? Feb 22, 2023 17:58

Manifisto

aaand submissions are CLOSED! thanks for the excellent entries! Finger Prince, good job getting yours in at the last minute!

judging will begin shortly, let's say in 10-15 minutes!

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Feb 22, 2023 18:03

Tiny Myers: say hello to my little friend

Finger Prince posted:

OFFICIAL SUBMISSION

This fine lady does ghost tours of the canals and nautical areas of Duluth. She is haunted forever by the ghost of a taxi she can see but is unable to hail.

wanna meet that lady

Thank you How Wonderful! for the autumn sig!

# ? Feb 22, 2023 18:05

Manifisto

these were a lot of outstanding entries, I feel positively spooked! since judging is arbitrary, I have decided to NOT CARE (this time around) that certain entries failed to contain the "OFFICIAL SUBMISSION" language as directed in the task. consider this a warning . . . the next judge may not be so lenient!

Dumb Sex-Parrot posted:

Dumb Sex-Parrot, unless I am very mistaken it looks like some rather important parts are missing from that ship. can you tell me anything more about it?

# ? Feb 22, 2023 18:12

Manifisto

Saoshyant posted:

The Glass Squid, a species that resemble undersea alien ghosts.

are you going to tell me this is something my size or larger that I need to obsess about whenever I get into water that is too deep for me to stand, or is it a tiny little fellow I can drink up by the thousands without noticing it?

Manifisto fucked around with this message at 18:15 on Feb 22, 2023

# ? Feb 22, 2023 18:13

Manifisto

your friend sk posted:

I 100% forget why and where I took this

e: I should say, I was definitely in a boat

so is the traffic cone actually a ghost, or merely a haunted traffic cone?

# ? Feb 22, 2023 18:15

Manifisto

Tiny Myers posted:

I present to you: tiny silicone mermaid fetuses in thermoplastic shark egg cases (colloquially known as "mermaid's purses"). Courtesy of Etsy.

perhaps the creepiest thing about this is the dye that was used, that 100% looks like the upper torso of a baby human that has somehow been fused with a tide pod

# ? Feb 22, 2023 18:17

Saoshyant

Manifisto posted:

are you going to tell me this is something my size or larger that I need to obsess about whenever I get into water that is too deep for me to stand, or is it a tiny little fellow I can drink up by the thousands without noticing it?

Hm, you can't drink them because it would be noticeable, but they can be small.

And also big. Much, much bigger than you...

quote:

They range in mantle length from 10 cm (3.9 in) to over 3 m (9.8 ft)

So goodnight out there, wherever you swim HAHAHA

^{awesome spring sig by RavenousScoot}

# ? Feb 22, 2023 18:19

Saoshyant

Although if you did swim at the depths they usually hang around, you may be facing bigger issues (e.g. devastating pressure, no oxygen, no light) than rubbing your feet in one of 'em ghost alien squids.

# ? Feb 22, 2023 18:21

Manifisto

biosterous posted:

the wreck of the titanic is pretty fuckin haunted

amazing how much the hull looks like a gigantic whale, but it's the submersible that really makes the image by highlighting the scale. were there no images of leonardo dicaprio's ghost? is he still down there drawing french ghosts in their altogether?

# ? Feb 22, 2023 18:21

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# ? Apr 27, 2024 11:16

your friend sk: (ヤイケス!)

Manifisto posted:

so is the traffic cone actually a ghost, or merely a haunted traffic cone?

I imagine traffic cone ghosts wear conic orange sheets

Join the BYOB Army

^{thank you again Saoshyant!!}

# ? Feb 22, 2023 18:22

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > BYOB Taskmaster IS CONCLUDED FOR 2023, Congratulations To The Winners!

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