BYOB Taskmaster IS CONCLUDED FOR 2023, Congratulations To The Winners!

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > BYOB Taskmaster IS CONCLUDED FOR 2023, Congratulations To The Winners!

«‹›3 »

Manifisto

Welcome to BYOB Taskmaster!

***TODAY IS THE FINALE OF TASKMASTER! THE FINAL TASK IS CLOSED AND AWAITING JUDGING.***
Links:
Task 1 Task 1 Scores
Task 2 Continuation of Task 2 Task 2 Scores
Task 3 Task 3 Scores
Task 4 Task 4 Scores
Task 5 Task 5 Scores
Secret Task 1 Scores
Task 6 Task 6 Scores
Task 7 Task 7 Scores
Task 8 Task 8 Scores
Task 9 Task 9 Judging
Task 10 Task 10 Judging
Task 11 Task 11 Judging
Task 12 Continuation of Task 12 Task 12 Judging
Task 13

Inspired by the British TV game show of the same name, for the next few days, we will be challenging BYOB with a series of arbitrary, really mostly rather silly and pointless, tasks, for which I and my colleagues will judge you mercilessly! Anyone can participate in any or all of the tasks, and your entries will be awarded from zero to five points in the unimpeachable discretion of whoever is judging the task. Whoever collects the most points by the end of the competition (on Sunday) wins first place!

The first place winner will receive their choice of forums upgrade, a special gang tag that only the winner is allowed to use, and best of all this lovely golden trophy:

Second and third place winners will be awarded their choice of forums upgrade. And everyone who has participated in at least one task is eligible for a taskmaster participant gang tag! Also there is a limited supply of extra-special bonus prizes for participants, to be revealed at some suitably dramatic moment!!

The official rules will be listed in the next post. For now, please be aware that the first official task will be revealed today at 10:00AM Eastern time (all times will be listed in Eastern time for consistency, please convert to your local time!).

And don't be surprised when, in the coming days, some special GUEST JUDGES introduce themselves! While Goatse and Gallant and myself will be judging some of the tasks, we have called for reinforcements from people with arguably much better taste!! (However, they did agree to be guest judges, so how good can their taste be, really?)

Finally, a little note. If you have ever seen the show (or its brethren from Australia and/or New Zealand), you will be aware that the judging of the tasks is often arbitrary, unfair, and frankly rather salty. So don't be surprised if you see some mild trash-talking, it's done without malice and in the name of a fun competition. Feel free to give it back! Keeping in mind that your scores are completely in the hands of the judges . . .

Manifisto fucked around with this message at 00:04 on Feb 27, 2023

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 13:15

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 9, 2024 03:56

Manifisto

Official Rules:

Any SA forum user can participate in any task (although there may be a few "secret" tasks that you will only know about if you have signed up in advance). You can participate in as many or as few tasks as you please, however, the more tasks you participate in, the greater your chances of winning!
Tasks are judged on a scale of 1 to 5 points, or zero points if, in the opinion of the judge, you somehow failed to complete the task correctly (for example, you broke a rule in the task). Scores are entirely at the discretion of the judge, who may be as arbitrary as they like. This is for funsies!
Highest score at the end of the competition wins. If there is more than one person with the same high score, there will be a run-off to determine the final winner. There will be only one first place!
For each task, the judge will specify the deadline as well as how entries are to be submitted. For some tasks, entries can be posted in the official thread as soon as they are completed; some should not be posted before a particular deadline; and some should be submitted directly to the judge. Please pay attention to how you are supposed to submit your task, failing to abide by this may earn you zero points!
READ THE TASK! As Alex likes to say, "everything you need to know is in the task."
It is not a requirement that anyone buy anything or spend any money out of pocket to do any task. Use what's available to you. Also, it is not a requirement that anyone show their face or do anything to doxx themselves. Please use ordinary caution, and for photos/videos, it is suggested that you strip any metadata (especially location metadata) that might identify you, if that is sensitive to you.
The judges and mods reserve the right to disqualify and/or delete entries that violate forum rules (both BYOB and the forum as a whole) or are contrary to the spirit of the game.

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 13:26

Manifisto

Rarity posted:

I'm Aisling Bea and I'm in it to win it. Now when do I take my knickers off?

*the judges huddle together, making concerned noises*

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 13:56

Manifisto

Good morning my fine and excellent orbs! Who's ready for some tasks?

I think the general idea has been conveyed, but to reiterate, this is all about doing your best with what you've got in the time allotted--which you may find rather short in some cases! But pretty much any entry is better than no entry, because most entries will earn you points unless you really, really screw something up. Please read the tasks carefully, they will contain important information about how and when your responses are to be submitted, which may vary from task to task.

TASK 1

Bring me the most haunted nautical object or image! You have until 12:00 noon EST (that's two hours from now) to post an image ITT that is your candidate for most haunted. PLEASE INCLUDE THE WORDS "OFFICIAL SUBMISSION" IN YOUR ENTRY POST to help us resolve any ambiguities (only one submission per player, please). Your time starts . . . now!!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 15:58

Manifisto

Viginti Septem posted:

Did we ever discuss how often tasks will be posted?

no, but I'll be happy to give some guidance! there will be several tasks per day, somewhere between two and four. most tasks will leave at least an hour for completion, preferably more (there may be a very few lightning round exceptions). tasks will probably not be posted before 10:00am eastern each day. a few tasks which may be slightly more involved will probably go on overnight. we will try our best to keep it clear what the next thing coming up will be, whether it is a deadline/judging or the announcement of a new task.

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 16:20

Manifisto

Dumb Sex-Parrot posted:

OFFICIAL SUBMISSION

and we're off to a very promising start!!

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 16:20

Manifisto

Saoshyant posted:

The Glass Squid, a species that resemble undersea alien ghosts.

did you bring enough for the entire class?

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 16:35

Manifisto

Rarity posted:

Oh no is being on GMT gonna gently caress me over?

I hope not! we have tried to balance the times as best we can with the pacific coast folks being earlier and the trans-atlantic folks being later. folks on japan/australia time are kinda screwed and I'm sorry about that. longer tasks being overnight is designed to give most people a few hours in their normal working day to address the task, hopefully. we will be looking for feedback about time frames (was the amount of time right for each task, were the time frames acceptable to people in various time zones) to help inform any future versions of this or similar competitions.

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 16:47

Manifisto

five-ish minutes to go, there's still time to get an entry in under the wire!!

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 17:53

Manifisto

aaand submissions are CLOSED! thanks for the excellent entries! Finger Prince, good job getting yours in at the last minute!

judging will begin shortly, let's say in 10-15 minutes!

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:03

Manifisto

these were a lot of outstanding entries, I feel positively spooked! since judging is arbitrary, I have decided to NOT CARE (this time around) that certain entries failed to contain the "OFFICIAL SUBMISSION" language as directed in the task. consider this a warning . . . the next judge may not be so lenient!

Dumb Sex-Parrot posted:

Dumb Sex-Parrot, unless I am very mistaken it looks like some rather important parts are missing from that ship. can you tell me anything more about it?

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:12

Manifisto

Saoshyant posted:

The Glass Squid, a species that resemble undersea alien ghosts.

are you going to tell me this is something my size or larger that I need to obsess about whenever I get into water that is too deep for me to stand, or is it a tiny little fellow I can drink up by the thousands without noticing it?

Manifisto fucked around with this message at 18:15 on Feb 22, 2023

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:13

Manifisto

your friend sk posted:

I 100% forget why and where I took this

e: I should say, I was definitely in a boat

so is the traffic cone actually a ghost, or merely a haunted traffic cone?

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:15

Manifisto

Tiny Myers posted:

I present to you: tiny silicone mermaid fetuses in thermoplastic shark egg cases (colloquially known as "mermaid's purses"). Courtesy of Etsy.

perhaps the creepiest thing about this is the dye that was used, that 100% looks like the upper torso of a baby human that has somehow been fused with a tide pod

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:17

Manifisto

biosterous posted:

the wreck of the titanic is pretty fuckin haunted

amazing how much the hull looks like a gigantic whale, but it's the submersible that really makes the image by highlighting the scale. were there no images of leonardo dicaprio's ghost? is he still down there drawing french ghosts in their altogether?

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:21

Manifisto

Saoshyant posted:

Hm, you can't drink them because it would be noticeable, but they can be small.

And also big. Much, much bigger than you...

So goodnight out there, wherever you swim HAHAHA

3 meters okay thank you very much and nope nope nope

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:22

Manifisto

barnold posted:

presented for the approval of the midnight society is a Royal Navy Hammock Cat. now what is so spooky or haunted about a bunch of sailors and a cat in a hammock you might ask? well let the truth be revealed - these souls are aboard the HMS Hermione, which was fatefully struck by a torpedo on June 16, 1942 and sank to the depths of the Mediterranean Sea, killing 88 men 🙀

drat you this was such a lighthearted and v byob image without the back story!

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:24

Manifisto

Stoner Sloth posted:

This is the last known footage of the Lusitania, one of the great Olympic class vessels of the Cunard line.

If any picture can be said to be haunted, or haunting, it is this one. Thank you for your consideration of this entry.

. . . whereas with this one, the graininess of the image actually lends it a haunted quality even without the story behind it.

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:26

Manifisto

Charles Bukowski posted:

I humbly submit a haunted sextant that sleeps in a coffin.

what on earth? does the ebay listing really call it haunted?

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:27

Manifisto

Viginti Septem posted:

an epic story! I was gonna say it reminded me of something . . .

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:28

Manifisto

Quadramind posted:

this is, not gonna lie, a perfect example of creepiness. I am imagining coming across that in some abandoned house in the woods, and getting a very clear sense that I should not under any circumstances pick it up . . .

any backstory, or did you just like the photo?

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:30

Manifisto

Rarity posted:

This is Chuuk Lagoon, the world's largest underwater graveyard. It is the resting place for 60 ships, 275 aircraft and thousands of people with human remains littering the floor. In 1944 this was the site of Operation Hailstone, an Allied offensive on a Japanese airbase that claimed the lives of over 3000 people.

Also this is the only image with actual ghosts

agreed, you have about 300% more ghosts in your image than anyone else!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:32

Manifisto

Finger Prince posted:

This fine lady does ghost tours of the canals and nautical areas of Duluth. She is haunted forever by the ghost of a taxi she can see but is unable to hail.

this lady clearly has a story to tell--multiple stories--and if I am ever in the Duluth area and have some time to kill I am 100% going to take one of her tours

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:33

Manifisto

okay, THE SCORES! this one was hard to judge.

zero points - nobody gets zero points this time around.

one and two points - nobody gets one or two points. they were all good submissions!

three points - Saoshyant (terrifying! haunted though?), your friend sk (hilarious image, but I am more intrigued than spooked), Charles Bukowski (the coffin certainly is puzzling but I do not feel haunted), viginti septem (love the story)

four points - Dumb Sex-Parrot (cool intriguing image), Stoner Sloth (nice bit of history), biosterous (just a great photo), Quadramind (lots of atmosphere but also nicely subtle), Tiny Myers (call david cronenberg!)

five points - Rarity (most ghosts in her image, also great image location), barnold (extra points for the byob connection), Finger Prince (awesome lady, clearly if not haunted herself is v familiar with da spooks)

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:48

Manifisto

okay, watch this space, the next task is coming soon! more specifically, right around 1:00 PM EST!!

normally after the judging we will post the cumulative scores, but since this is the first round, we'll skip that this time!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:49

Manifisto

quote is not edit dammit!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:52

Manifisto

beer pal posted:

my submission was so ghostly and spectral and ethereal that you couldnt even see the post

ooh let me go back and redo the scores!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 18:54

Manifisto

Stoner Sloth posted:

objection!

those aren't real ghosts which, as we all know, don't show up on camera - hence there were millions of ghosts in my image, the spooky bit is you can't see them!

Rarity posted:

They are metaphorical representations of the countless spirits resting as denizens of the depths

ah metaphors, effortlessly encapsulating the world around us, like some kind of, uh, figurative description . . . things

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 19:22

Manifisto

Stoner Sloth posted:

OFFICIAL SUBMISSION

lol somehow I knew . . . I just knew . . . this was coming

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 19:39

Manifisto

Rarity posted:

Rocksanne

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 20:52

Manifisto

Rarity posted:

Are these tasks being scored separately or together?

I believe there will be one combined score for both parts. GaG can correct me if I'm wrong!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 21:15

Manifisto

dang there is some stiff competition here, glad I'm not the one doing the judging!

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 22:56

Manifisto

okay, as it's now just past 5pm EST, submissions for Task 2 are closed! our judge for this task, GaG, will weigh in with the scores shortly!

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 23:06

Manifisto

nut posted:

no i don't even have rocks nearby ( it's illegal to wake them during winter)

I'm going to call shenanigans on this, as nuts are technically very small rocks

it's called science my dude

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 23:39

Manifisto

nut posted:

oh in that case i look like poo poo

you look like your usual dashing self, bicycling that air like you just don't care

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 23:43

Manifisto

thank you GaG for the scoring! I promised I'd keep a running total (as they do on the show), the current rankings are:

Rarity 10
Dumb Sex-Parrot 9
Finger Prince 9
your friend sk 7
biosterous 7
barnold 7
Stoner Sloth 7
Charles Bukowski 7
Quadramind 7
Tiny Myers 6
Saoshyant 3
Viginti Septem 3

but please note there are a lot of tasks left, plenty of opportunities for even someone who has not yet participated to walk away with first place!! and on that note, our next task will be announced tomorrow, Feb. 23 at around 10:00am EST! see you all then!

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 23, 2023 00:37

Manifisto

Good morning! I hope you all are well rested and ready to take on another day of tasking!

Task 3

Hopefully you are familiar with the BYOB Goldmine. As wonderful as it is, it's missing something: your posts! Or more specifically, posts that you could have and possibly should have made in those goldmined threads!

Your task is to select a single thread--the best thread, from your perspective--from the BYOB Goldmine, and then write a single post (from you) that should have been in that thread. The combined best thread choice and best missing post wins! You have until 11:30AM Eastern to select your thread and post a link to the thread, along with the text of the post you think should have been included, ITT. That's an hour and a half away. Your time starts . . . now!

ty nesamdoom!

# ¿ Feb 23, 2023 15:59

Manifisto

nice work so far, keep 'em coming! the deadline is in just a few minutes!

# ¿ Feb 23, 2023 17:23

Manifisto

. . . aaand Task 3 is closed! thanks for all the entries, judging will begin shortly!

# ¿ Feb 23, 2023 17:31

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 9, 2024 03:56

Manifisto

Snuff Melange posted:

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3981248&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=2

Of course you can, buddy!

love it! my pulse is racing just looking at the photo. will he escape . . . from noise? Five points!

your friend sk posted:

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3967710&pagenumber=4&perpage=40

your friend sk should have posted:

ribbit for her pleasure

this gets a good heartly lol from me, and four points!

biosterous posted:

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3972890

biosterous posted:

i'm not sorry

magnificent! five points!

barnold posted:

thread: Should I go to a party in six hours

post that should have been included:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aAHOLPSFHis

hopefully the vengabus came for our long-ago byob friends even without your addition. three points!

Rarity posted:

OFFICIAL SUBMISSION

The BYOB Goldmine is a very special place full of beautiful threads that have been lovingly cultivated by the coolest and chillest of BYOB. With hundreds of threads to choose from I knew that only something truly spectacular was befitting of the presence, the wit, the grandeur of BYOB's Dark Queen Rarity. I have scoured every thread, nay every post and each one is worthy of praise but this led me to a dismal perplexion. How could I decide one thread on which to bestow my love when all our so deserving? So many wonderful OPs, so many wonderful creators, to choose a favourite between them would cause quite the brouhaha. Truly I was lost in confusion. But then it hit me, in order to pay real homage to the foremothers that have paved the roads on which I now walk there was only one legitimate contender. To recognise where we are going we have to recognise where we have been and therefore I had to go back. Back all the way to the very birth, nay the divine creation from which the BYOB Goldmine was formed. With that in mind it was time to write a post of such alacrity, such candid honesty, such eye-searing beauty that all who saw it would treasure the image in their memories for the rest of their days. Writing such a memorable screed may seem a formidable challenge but it is one I undertook with great fervour. Long did I rack my brains until the letters began to form, drawing themselves together in my mind as a message from a higher being. Such wisdom was designed to be imparted, finally I had found a post worthy of being celebrated in the halls of greatness in which our goldmine rests. So steel yourselves my orbs, for you are about to read what may - no, what must be - the greatest post in the history of our hallowed forums.

The thread:

Should I go to a party in six hours

The post:

Rarity posted:

Yes

a quote of elegant simplicity, yet there is no dearth of heady things to say about it. would that we could turn back time to the simple but chaotic celebrations of yesteryear, when we were free of plagues, questionable leaders, and so many of the worries that have chafed at us in recent years, and encourage windy to go to that drat party! such a refined and sophisticated entry deserves a refined and sophisticated score. Three points!

# ¿ Feb 23, 2023 17:54

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > BYOB Taskmaster IS CONCLUDED FOR 2023, Congratulations To The Winners!

«‹›3 »