Jonah Galtberg posted:

Can anyone remember whether the fecal lasagne thread was a fake?

Pablo Nergigante posted:

I’m Commander Shepard and this is the best thread on the forums

death cob for cutie posted:

hey can someone remind me of the thread where that one guy's roommate went completely insane and filled his bathtub with poo poo

the phrase "fecal lasagna" has been rolling around in my head and I just remembered where it was from

Vox Nihili posted:

Was that the guy who ran around in rice paddies at night with a spear and a gopro screaming like a maniac?

Or a different hog slayer

Grassy Knowles posted:

Sitting here giggling like I’m at the dentist at the intrusive thought “Home of the frog hog”

Frank Frank posted:

It blows my mind that there’s a Doobie thread in GBS that is loving 4 years old and it’s still going. People just repeating the same catchphrases over and over.

TheMightyBoops posted:

Is there any other funny Imp Zone tales besides the FE reverse recruitment one?

ItohRespectArmy posted:

the fact he still has it to this day is what really makes it lol

CubicalSucrose posted:

One of those IKs decided to speedrun the experience - https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=4026833

SirSamVimes posted:

And yet this crazy motherfucker hunted them with spears

B33rChiller posted:

Maybe some kind of pike?

TheMightyBoops posted:

If this is real can someone post it? Bit of Sunday reading.

Cthulu Carl posted:

Why does the cat have a calculator? Are cats good at math, because I still need to do my taxes.

Milo and POTUS posted:

I laugh at the round cat

Zetsubou-san posted:

how many video game derails does the mod forum get?

Frank Frank posted:

Lmao that some dude who is into rapey camgirl sims just busted into that thread and outed himself as the numero uno sex pest in the middle of all that.

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

Found it in the Goldmine: My housemate is doing a weird sex thing

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

lornekates posted:

Thanks, I appreciate the support.

The (long) short of it is:

1) A user was posting a Howard Stern related running gag in the Howard Stern thread. To refrain from drawing too much attention to this user, I'll just call him "The Petty loving Whiny poo poo-Fucker Known as Immortal Anime", or "Immortal Anime" for short.
2) A bunch of baby-pants Howard Stern fans got upset at an unfunny, worn-out "joke", which is super ironic given who they listen to.
3) I get near daily reports of "Immortal Anime posted Baba Booey wah wah". I laugh and file them under "Ignore". So let this be on the record, I was on the side of Immortal Anime and actively defending him against false reports of "thread-making GBS threads".
4) Some 50+ reports over several weeks later, I figure fine, let's make this fair. Post, to effect "Since this is a running joke, I will allow it as long as it's running. For as long as IA posts this once a day, every day, it isn't banned. Everyone else also is allowed to post this once a day with no repercussions. BUT if IA misses even a single day, the running joke has stopped running, and I'll agree it's thread-making GBS threads. Anyone posting it gets a probe/ban. I probably won't monitor it, so you have to let me know that the rule was broken. Anyone complaining to me around it gets a probation."
5) So it's a bog-standard "SomethingAwful is nonesense" thread rule. As is the, as I keep hearing, "SomethingAwful Culture".
6) IA misses a day, and the rule kicks in.
7) Some people explicitly test the rule, and get reported. They get a probation and/or ban. All is good and everyone is happy.
8) Some time later, someone else breaks the rule.
9) IA starts whining "MODS!". Literally. It's in the thread, you can go see it yourself. He also sends me a PM complaining about it. Note that this is against the rules, that everyone else was adhering too.
10) In the interest of fairness, I punish the original poster-- but also give Immortal Anime a short probation for breaking the rules. Maybe it was a day? I can't be arsed to check.
10.5) Again, can't be arsed, but I think for coming off his short probe-- wait, I think it was coming off the probe AND posting in the Howard Stern thread something like "gently caress you bitch rear end mod you can't touch me". Yeah, I think that was it. Well, that's just above and beyond any thread-rule thing. That's just rudeness and sass. So he gets a month probe for being so willfully brazen. I honestly don't care about the insults myself, but it isn't a good look to let someone who is already annoying the thread get away with off-topic straight out insults.
11) All seems well. Then Immortal Anime poops his diaper like a baby and starts to cry like a wussy to his friends who are mods in another thread.
12) They give him a short probation for something else. Depending on who you believe, it was either for breaking a rule in a different subforum (which happened to have the sideeffect of cancelling out the month-long probation-- that's how the SA mod system works for some reason)-- or it was doing that just as a cover story for intentionally evading a probation under a flimsy excuse. I think we can guess which way I lean now.
12.5) In fact, take special note of #12. IA was on probation, so he couldn't have posted something NEW that got him probated. That means that a moderator went back to an old post, and probated him for that. An old post. In the past. Keep a note of that.
13) I send a PM to the moderator "Hey, just an FYI, that user is on a month-long probe, just so we don't override each others' probes", because I figured it was an honest mistake. I don't hear anything back from that mod. Since I have no idea how that mod is related, and can't check on the mod queue anymore, I'll withhold that name.
14) I also make a post in the moderator subforums pretty much the same FYI, since I figure that's the best way to communicate with the other mods. In the mod subforum. For moderators. Where moderators talk to each other. Y'know.
15) An admin basically says "I retracted the overriding probe, I'll keep an eye on it". I say thank you.
16) I start getting PMs from several users alerting me that, once again, Immortal Anime has had his buddies short-circuit his probation. People are noticing that he's circumventing the rules, which is, again, not a good look. In fact, in the reading I did when I became a mod, I was under the impression that evading a probe or ban was itself a bannable / permabannable offense.
17) I re-queue the month ban because that is only fair.
18) Poopy-pants Immortal Anime, now that he's hidden under the skirt of his Mommy, sticks his tongue out at me, because he is a very mature adult. He starts emailing me PMs that range from insults to threats to nigh-doxxing. (Well, he thought he was being a Big Boy by insinuating he doxxed me, but since all he actually unearthed was one of the top hits when you google my name, it wasn't very impressive. For the record, it was the Master Chef Canada audition tape I put together for a laugh: https://vimeo.com/70910715).
19) I reply cordially to him, explaining at first that the most ironinc thing about his tantrum is that he actually had my support for his running joke. I had been explicitly protecting him-- rejecting requests to probate him for the running joke, and in fact came up with the thread rule to not only CONTINUE the running joke, but to actively punish anyone who tried to stop him. And instead he turn an ally into an enemy all on his own. My last PM to him is to calmly say "Look, my PMs are for moderator related communications. So unless this is official business, please don't PM me.". In other words, "I'm asking you nicely to stop trying to harass me, and I'm making that clear. This is me giving you an out to just walk away and not escalate this."
20) His response is to throw more mod sass. Like most "tee hee I'm being so clever" idiots, the words themselves are innocuous, but the intention is blatant. I don't like people like that. I really don't.
21) I do make these conversations and PM mod sass known in the Moderator threads. The message I get is basically "Yeah, people sassing in PM is a no-no, and is usually a punishable offense". Gotcha.
22) So, since I can't take an action on a PM (a mod can only action on posts in their own subform), I go back to find a post by Immortal Anime to action on. I was under the impression that you can't submit a probation on a post that already had a probation against it. I might have been mistaking, I can't confirm that-- typing this I might have been thinking "a user can't SUBMIT a mod report on a post that's already been reported". The first one I come across that hasn't been actioned on is one of his joke posts. I put a, I want to say 1 or 3 day on it. Kinda a subtle acknowledgement to the people who are already probing him for 1 or 3 days. It's short enough that if they try to evade it, they'll only make it longer by effect.
23) I start to get harassing PMs from Immortal Anime's friends. They are "harassing" in the same way-- innocuous phrase, intention is clear. I honestly don't care because it's a PM, but it's amusing in a way that watching a child trying to walk in Daddy's shoes is. They're just trying SO HARD to be Big Boy. But I don't really want a PM box full of people sending me these, so I respond with what is effectively a form letter, with the same intention as the one I sent to IA. "Thanks for emailing, I appreciate you taking the time. However, this PM is for mod business, etc, etc". If anyone has ever worked customer service, you know exactly how you handle an irate customer. They either want help, which you're here for them, or they want to yell, in which case you need to end the conversation. With a smile. I get a couple "you're weird" replies, but the PMs go away.
23.5) For the record, those PM users are, since you can easily cross-reference with people who are crying and lying in the QQcs thread: "pog boyfriend", "stay safe", "grumple wumpkins", and the lovely "gently caress My rear end".
24) All of the above is basically communicated in the Moderator sub-forum too, because I like to give co-workers a heads-up when a shitstorm is brewing, because there can be splash back. Also, so that if they're getting PMs or complaints with lies in them (again I'll point you to the QQcs thread), they have my version on hand. Silly me, I thought the word of a moderator, who is also a poster in good standing with the forum, would have more weight than some trolls with a grudge.
25) At this point, FactsAreUseless says he won't protect my month long probation. Whatever.
26) I log in and I'm demodded. (I wasn't aware of what's going on in QQcs thread at the time)
26.5) Now that I *AM* aware of that thread, remember what I said about point 12? "IA was on probation, so he couldn't have posted something NEW that got him probated. That means that a moderator went back to an old post, and probated him for that. An old post. In the past.". So yeah, check out that QQcs thread-- and note that the thing his buddies are complaining about is that he was probated for. The exact same thing. Funny how they can do one thing, then complain about other people do that same thing. Hmm, almost as if they're being-- disingenuous or something.
27) You'll note there is no bullet-point here where anyone from the Admin team says "Hey, Lorne, there's some performance we're unhappy about, so let's talk about it like adults to come to a mutually beneficial outcome". Or "We're thinking of demodding you, can you give us your side of this situation".
28) I log in and find I'm demodded, and a message from FactsAreUseless saying "I don't know if that's the way to phrase it, and I've never sent one of these before, so this will be super awkward. Anyway, we've demodded you. You seem like you're trying to be very serious and professional about moderation, but in a way that isn't really compatible with the forums. Thanks for all the work you put into RGD. I appreciate it."
29) What the gently caress? "serious and professional" about moderation. Yeah, no poo poo, that's what you do in a position of power and responsibility. And "serious", what the gently caress, have you ever read one of my posts? Did you SEE the goddamn hoop-jumpy stupid fun thread rule I put into place? And your appreciation is to demod me with no discussion? I feel REAL appreciated there, buddy.
30) And you will notice the "we" in there. Yeah, so, after talking with some other mods & admins though basically a few "What happened?!?" emails, trying to understand what happened, the messaging I get back is "We're surprised too. There was no discussion about this. No one on the admin team was part of this decision, just FactsAreUseless. Sorry."
31) I write this "short" post.

tldr: So there you go. A pissy-baby shitfucker known as Immortal Anime gets special privileges from a moderator. He then manages to still mess that up, and gets punished for it. He whines to his friends who help him evade punishment. He throws abuse, and gets punished for it. His friends whine, lie and misrepresent what happened. The whining makes it's way to an admin who is friends with the whiny babies. The admin acts on his own to demod me.

And what would a post be without some screenshots?

Immortal Anime going "wah wah my friends like me better i'm not mad ur mad it was just a joke and u don't like fun" (again, remember, the entire point of these rules was to LET him have his annoying fun). Note the pathetic attempt at "doxxing" there.



(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)