I Was Asked Not to Return to the Rap Battles

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > I Was Asked Not to Return to the Rap Battles

Drunk Nerds: Jan 25, 2011; Just close your eyes; Fun Shoe

Just reference inside jokes no one gets then chuckle to yourself with satisfaction.

I'm Pinky's, you're Doobies
More useless than Egeez

Followed by a hearty chuckle.

# ? Mar 26, 2023 13:45

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# ? May 12, 2024 07:31

Wee: Dec 16, 2022; by Fluffdaddy

It is the eye that deceives because I know
You're a real one rolling, scrolling
24 Seven on line Trolling
On my side, nothing to hide
Its like a show a clown
A smile now a frown
A fishtank
In an alley way restaurant
And they can get you whatever
the hell it is you want

# ? Mar 26, 2023 13:52

BigBadSteve: Apr 29, 2009

Escobarbarian posted:

This post is really embarrassing for you

Hardly. I well admit I'm a rock dude who knows next to nothing about Hiphop, though I bought an Action Bronson CD a few months ago and watched a documentary last week about Traphouse.

Few people of my generation are into Hiphop, that's just the way it is, I don't give a rat's rear end if anyone can't deal with that.

I still get to rib OP, because, heheh.

I'm quite entergaged reading the summaries of the criminal histories of rappers posted ITT. Including that info on my only rapper hero, Action Johnson. I will watch that Youtube video where he gets seriously threatened with death. What courage he had to keep on performing!

So tell me, "rap" fans, are the early Action Johnson CDs as good as Crocodrillo Turbo? Let me know pls. If so, I'd better buy them and listen to them, then I'll be about fully ready to find a nice rap club myself, enter a contest and win for sure. :c00lbert:

BigBadSteve fucked around with this message at 15:22 on Mar 26, 2023

# ? Mar 26, 2023 15:19

Wee: Dec 16, 2022; by Fluffdaddy

2023 wo0o

# ? Mar 26, 2023 15:24

Larry Cum Free: Jun 3, 2022; move it or lose it dillweed

MrQwerty posted:

OP finding out that musicians take performing music live seriously

Yeah it has become super clear the last few days that people REALLY like to gatekeep performing!

# ? Mar 26, 2023 22:08

Nigmaetcetera: Nov 17, 2004; borkborkborkmorkmorkmork-gabbalooins

Music shouldn't be competitive.

# ? Mar 26, 2023 22:12

MrQwerty: Apr 15, 2003

Larry Cum Free posted:

Yeah it has become super clear the last few days that people REALLY like to gatekeep performing!

it's not gatekeeping as much as it is practicing what you want to do to a point where you don't piss your pants on stage

# ? Mar 26, 2023 22:55

thin blue whine: Feb 21, 2004; PLEASE SEE POLICY; Soiled Meat

Larry Cum Free posted:

Well excuse me for trying something hard instead of giving up and becoming a drummer

dang OP too bad you can't pop off like this on stage

# ? Mar 26, 2023 23:12

FirstnameLastname: Jul 10, 2022; got me 50 ounces out a bird in this bitch

Mozi posted:

This is pretty interesting but also makes me glad I don�t like or care about rap (not judging just a preference) because it would be frustrating to me to have my favorite musicians murdering each other.

the violence and drug deaths are the most depressing part of the genre definitely

since about 2019 I had to stop following the scene as closely because it just burned me out and since then, the violence has only gotten worse than it's ever been. so many new up-&-coming artists would be dead by the time i heard of them, or within a year of them making waves

makes it hard to really get into new artists, like if i see an under 20yo drill or trap artist with a hot song, especially? i automatically assume they're more likely to be murdered than they are to have another successful release, it's that bad now, wasn't ever like that until the last 5 years or so

# ? Mar 27, 2023 00:03

Flowers for QAnon: May 20, 2019

I like to gently caress 'em in they rear end while he beat up the pussy
Birdman - #1 stunna

# ? Mar 27, 2023 00:34

Flowers for QAnon: May 20, 2019

Listen up, let me tell you 'bout my friend Larry
He's got a problem that's kinda scary
His mom's so fat, it's hard to describe
She's so big, she needs a bus to ride

Larry's mom's so fat, she's like a living mountain
When she walks by, the ground starts to fountain
People try to climb her, just for fun
But it's too hard, 'cause she blocks out the sun

Larry's mom's so fat, she's the talk of the town
Everybody knows her, and they all gather 'round
Larry's mom's so fat, it's hard to believe
But she's still a great mom, and that's what we all perceive

Despite her size, Larry's mom is really kind
She's got a heart that's big enough to unwind
She's always there when Larry needs a hand
And that's why he loves her, and thinks she's grand

Outro:
So don't be too quick to judge a book by its cover
Larry's mom's weight may make you stutter
But she's more than just her size, she's a great mom indeed
And Larry's lucky to have her, that's guaranteed.

# ? Mar 27, 2023 00:38

Snowy: Oct 6, 2010; A man whose blood
Is very snow-broth;
One who never feels
The wanton stings and
Motions of the sense

Op pulled a canibus. Next time pull out a page of lyrics when you get nervous, people love that

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9KjsBIsr2g&t=1691s

E- if you�ve never seen this video do yourself a favor and watch the whole thing

Snowy fucked around with this message at 02:05 on Mar 27, 2023

# ? Mar 27, 2023 00:43

A Strange Aeon: Mar 26, 2010; You are now a slimy little toad; The Great Twist

I remember my college TV station was showing a local rap battle one night and there were some good lines I still remember the punchlines to but not the set up, like

"I rock you like a hurricane
You're just lovely weather"

But I remember the host being kinda frustrated and reminding everyone "look, it's cool you're all dropping albums and poo poo, but this is supposed to be free style" because I guess people were presenting stuff that was too obviously scripted

# ? Mar 27, 2023 01:28

Poohs Packin: Jan 13, 2019

FirstnameLastname posted:

the violence and drug deaths are the most depressing part of the genre definitely

since about 2019 I had to stop following the scene as closely because it just burned me out and since then, the violence has only gotten worse than it's ever been. so many new up-&-coming artists would be dead by the time i heard of them, or within a year of them making waves

makes it hard to really get into new artists, like if i see an under 20yo drill or trap artist with a hot song, especially? i automatically assume they're more likely to be murdered than they are to have another successful release, it's that bad now, wasn't ever like that until the last 5 years or so

Internet hip hop nerds starting boosting like literal 16 year old gang bangers from Chicago housing projects.

You could just not listen to this stuff and still have thousands and thousands of new rap tracks at your fingertips, which it sounds like you have.

There's plenty of rap and hip hop that isn't exclusively about murdering people in your housing project.

Im not disparaging the literal children making this music but I've got moral qualms gaining entertainment value from listening to nihilistic gang beefs playing out in real time. Seems icky.

I guess my point is you can engage with the genre in a way that isn't bringing you as up close and personal with actual murdering.

# ? Mar 27, 2023 09:12

Larry Cum Free: Jun 3, 2022; move it or lose it dillweed

Guys calm down I�m not going to murder anyone because I like rap. You sound like my mom when I first said I was going down to the club and I had to explain that �Rap Battles� didn�t mean rappers shooting each other.

I told you I�m not doing any drill lyrics because it�s inauthentic to me.

# ? Mar 27, 2023 14:29

Pontificating Ass: Aug 2, 2002; What Doth Life?

OP just realize these people probably suck, like they are actually loving annoying and stupid people
and you thought you understood them to some extent but you dont and they will probably keep doing lovely things while they piss away their lovely lives rapping about their lovely lives

# ? Mar 27, 2023 14:35

Larry Cum Free: Jun 3, 2022; move it or lose it dillweed

The hate I�m feeling in this thread is kind of inspiring me to try battling again

# ? Mar 27, 2023 14:52

Panic! At The Tesco: Aug 19, 2005; FART

Larry Cum Free posted:

Guys calm down I�m not going to murder anyone because I like rap.

i am

but that's because i have a secret dark side i call slim shady :unsmigghh:

# ? Mar 27, 2023 15:07

Dixville: Nov 4, 2008; I don't think!; Ham Wrangler

Larry Cum Free posted:

Guys calm down I�m not going to murder anyone because I like rap. You sound like my mom when I first said I was going down to the club and I had to explain that �Rap Battles� didn�t mean rappers shooting each other.

I told you I�m not doing any drill lyrics because it�s inauthentic to me.

You could at least practice coming up with stuff on the fly by yourself or in front of friends and not just go straight to doing it in front of an audience.

If you need to find someone to make fun of you should turn off YOUR MONITOR heheje

# ? Mar 27, 2023 15:17

istewart: Apr 13, 2005; Still contemplating why I didn't register here under a clever pseudonym

Larry Cum Free posted:

You sound like my mom when I first said I was going down to the club and I had to explain that �Rap Battles� didn�t mean rappers shooting each other.

You should show her an episode of Dragonball Z and tell her that's what rap battles really are. Like dudes actually start glowing and poo poo

# ? Mar 27, 2023 15:49

Mozi: Apr 4, 2004; Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die; Nap Ghost

Dixville posted:

You could at least practice coming up with stuff on the fly by yourself or in front of friends and not just go straight to doing it in front of an audience.

If you need to find someone to make fun of you should turn off YOUR MONITOR heheje

well the face i'm lookin at is pretty fat
pasty white and bad digestion
weird lumps and strange bumps
pot session can't save from depression
mushrooms taken root from spores
colonize the forehead scores
feeling bored looking at my sores
time to turn on the monitors

# ? Mar 27, 2023 16:02

Mulaney Power Move: Dec 30, 2004

This is worse than what happened to that Captain Dan guy on live television

# ? Mar 27, 2023 21:40

Mulaney Power Move: Dec 30, 2004

I remember this girl I was talking to ended up hooking up with this slam poetry guy and when she saw him at his club he and all his other slam poet friends or whatever just belittled her the whole night. Like new kid in class goes home from junior high crying bad. I can't explain why this is hilarious to me.

# ? Mar 27, 2023 21:56

William Henry Hairytaint: Oct 29, 2011

syntaxfunction posted:

I think I described slam poetry as "the sort of thing you'd hear if mimes could speak"

I love this

# ? Mar 27, 2023 22:02

MrQwerty: Apr 15, 2003

Larry Cum Free posted:

The hate I�m feeling in this thread is kind of inspiring me to try battling again

you should probably not go back to the event you were asked never to return to by the host/booker immediately, especially with the intent to go back on stage without practicing at all

# ? Mar 27, 2023 22:07

Poohs Packin: Jan 13, 2019

Mulaney Power Move posted:

I remember this girl I was talking to ended up hooking up with this slam poetry guy and when she saw him at his club he and all his other slam poet friends or whatever just belittled her the whole night. Like new kid in class goes home from junior high crying bad. I can't explain why this is hilarious to me.

Cmon and slam

# ? Mar 27, 2023 22:07

Larry Cum Free: Jun 3, 2022; move it or lose it dillweed

I was thinking of going in a mask and being like "MC Incognito" or "L'il Luch" (short for Luchador - like if I was wearing a luchador mask) or something. It might help with the anxiety too.

# ? Mar 27, 2023 22:31

Flowers for QAnon: May 20, 2019

FirstnameLastname posted:

it's a must watch for several reasons, video is insane you can't really describe how fuckin scary he comes off in it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z93IaKPY_Wc

action bronson never responded publicly, but as far as I know there was never any issue after that, and he doesn't sound like ghostface too much anymore, there's some theatricality in the way that the message was delivered but that's not theater

I don�t find this scary, I just see a pathetic old man

# ? Mar 27, 2023 22:35

Flowers for QAnon: May 20, 2019

Larry Cum Free posted:

I was thinking of going in a mask and being like "MC Incognito" or "L'il Luch" (short for Luchador - like if I was wearing a luchador mask) or something. It might help with the anxiety too.

Yes, please do. Make sure to strap a GoPro to your head.

# ? Mar 27, 2023 22:36

hot cocoa on the couch: Dec 8, 2009

BigBadSteve posted:

I'm starting to think you're having a lend of us.

A probable trouble with you being 'authentic' is that hiphop has conventions. A whole lot of the lyrics are, I believe, about living in, and trying to escape from, the ghetto.

You can rap about your office job, office politics (watch you don't get sued for libel though, seriously), what your mom made you for dinner, and even about these very forums. But that would be only of interest to you, and maybe to us (if it's good/funny enough).

A middle class white rapper just might have a niche as a comedy rapper in non-ghetto comedy clubs (try an open mic night maybe), though I think you'd need much more awareness of Self and where you fit in the world than you're demonstrating ITT.

That's why you failed, not (mainly) for wearing your work clothes, you fool, you clown, you absolute idiot.

I suggest you suck your own balls and eat your own crap for like a year or more, until you develop enough humility to create good art.

jfc

# ? Mar 27, 2023 22:37

MrQwerty: Apr 15, 2003

Larry Cum Free posted:

I was thinking of going in a mask and being like "MC Incognito" or "L'il Luch" (short for Luchador - like if I was wearing a luchador mask) or something. It might help with the anxiety too.

yeah they definitely won't know who you are lmao

# ? Mar 27, 2023 22:39

William Henry Hairytaint: Oct 29, 2011

Larry Cum Free posted:

I was thinking of going in a mask and being like "MC Incognito" or "L'il Luch" (short for Luchador - like if I was wearing a luchador mask) or something. It might help with the anxiety too.

Don't. You've been asked not to return, respect it. You'll end up getting your rear end kicked and then cell phone video will get out of a white guy getting owned by black bouncers and Fox News and the other shitheads will take it and run with it and it'll be all your fault.

# ? Mar 27, 2023 22:39

Dixville: Nov 4, 2008; I don't think!; Ham Wrangler

Larry Cum Free posted:

I was thinking of going in a mask and being like "MC Incognito" or "L'il Luch" (short for Luchador - like if I was wearing a luchador mask) or something. It might help with the anxiety too.

Luchacris was right there

# ? Mar 27, 2023 22:40

Lil Swamp Booger Baby: Aug 1, 1981

FirstnameLastname posted:

to emphasize my point:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jtchKk_stCU

this is the song that got 50 cent shot nine times, cuz he was too ballsy and straight said names and stuff that'd happened
like, for real, look up almost *any* name he drops in this song and it'll be someone who was/is real in the drug game and he's saying poo poo that really went down

this brought a Lot of attention on people who wanted none, which pissed off jimmy henchman, who had him shot, iirc by a friend of Mike Tyson (seriously), jimmy henchman also had jam master jay shot, AND had tupac robbed and shot in NY which set off the east-west beef

NY hiphop crime poo poo isn't just real as gently caress in the 90s-00s, it's a smaller world than you'd imagine it to be, and some of the stuff that's gone down is so insane that it just sounds made up

I'm not trying to be an rear end in a top hat it's just really, that's real poo poo. it's not professional wrestling except for stuff at the very tippy top of the industry where there's pop crossover, like the Pusha T/Kanye(Pre-Nazi) - Drske beef, which even that got squashed by Jay Prince, because it was pissing him off, because drake makes him money

watch the video of Jay Prince standing next to Kanye as he's reading out an apology to Drake, its on YouTube it's like 2min long, you can see him mouthing the words and Kanye looks like a hostage reading a forced confession

it wasn't an accident, he's doing that because he wanted Kanye to be embarrassed having to let everyone know it was actually Prince who forced it to happen as a power move

what kind of influence does a person have to make a billionaire who listens to fuckin nobody on earth listen to them?

he made Kanye do a charity concert with Drake to raise money for Larry Hoover 's legal fund.
Larry Hoover's the founder of the BD (Black Disciple) gang and doing six life sentences at ADX Florence supermax

Takeoff from Migos was killed at an event in Houston being hosted by Jay Prince's son, Jay Prince Jr (lol)

one time Master P, the make em say unghhh no limit soulja dude, kidnapped Pimp C of UGK, over some beef like, tied up in a hotel room and pistol whipped him at least once, and was going to kill him, but UGK was signed to Rap-A-Lot

so Master P had to call up Jay Prince and ask him for the okay and he told him no and he let him go

then had UGK and Master P make some songs together

Prince is still running rapalot today

master P still owns No Limit

Birdman's still running CM, Diddy's still signing people

there's 'fake' gangster rappers thatre essentially 100% the image/aesthetic for sure, like Rick Ross, Lil Wayne's always been making stuff up, Asap Rocky's always making stuff up

but they aren't all action bronson & it's not all pbony stuff at any tier of the industry & that cosa nostra mafia poo poo in mid 90s NY became an aesthetic but it started from rappers having real-rear end mob connections

speaking of action bronson, him and ghostface, (who was the co-originator of the cosanostra NY rap, with raekwon on OB4CL), had some issues about 7-8 years back over Bronson copping ghostfaces style or saying something about how that sound isnt "only ghostfaces" after already having an issue

ghostface put up this video, calling him a fat gently caress like 50 times, tells him he might have him lit on fire for saying his name, threatens to hang him from a rope and gut him like a pig, and mentions that he's got shooters all over the country who'll do the time for killing him followed by "i know your your schedule bruh"

it's a must watch for several reasons, video is insane you can't really describe how fuckin scary he comes off in it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z93IaKPY_Wc

action bronson never responded publicly, but as far as I know there was never any issue after that, and he doesn't sound like ghostface too much anymore, there's some theatricality in the way that the message was delivered but that's not theater

Lmfao

# ? Mar 27, 2023 22:54

thin blue whine: Feb 21, 2004; PLEASE SEE POLICY; Soiled Meat

Dixville posted:

You could at least practice coming up with stuff on the fly by yourself or in front of friends and not just go straight to doing it in front of an audience.

Naw, gently caress your friends post it here OP. Drop some bars on us, you should do some live disses on this thread.

# ? Mar 27, 2023 23:06

Dixville: Nov 4, 2008; I don't think!; Ham Wrangler

thin blue whine posted:

Naw, gently caress your friends post it here OP. Drop some bars on us, you should do some live disses on this thread.

I was gonna ask this but I'm afraid the vicarious embarrassment will be too strong

# ? Mar 27, 2023 23:16

deep dish peat moss: Jul 27, 2006

FirstnameLastname posted:

the violence and drug deaths are the most depressing part of the genre definitely

since about 2019 I had to stop following the scene as closely because it just burned me out and since then, the violence has only gotten worse than it's ever been. so many new up-&-coming artists would be dead by the time i heard of them, or within a year of them making waves

makes it hard to really get into new artists, like if i see an under 20yo drill or trap artist with a hot song, especially? i automatically assume they're more likely to be murdered than they are to have another successful release, it's that bad now, wasn't ever like that until the last 5 years or so

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_HZa6UWW2H8

deep dish peat moss fucked around with this message at 23:24 on Mar 27, 2023

# ? Mar 27, 2023 23:20

Flowers for QAnon: May 20, 2019

Method Man�s portrayal of �cheese� in The Wire was autobiographical. However Do NOT call him �Cheese�, or someone will yell �worldstar� and you will never be able to rap battle again

# ? Mar 27, 2023 23:21

Ralph Hurley: Aug 3, 2009

I�m the best mayne
I did it

# ? Mar 28, 2023 00:12

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# ? May 12, 2024 07:31

blight rhino: Feb 11, 2014; EXQUISITE ~~LURKER~~ RHINO; Nap Ghost

Larry Cum Free posted:

Some of those are really good but I want my rhymes to be authentic to who I am and I�m not from the streets. I think part of the problem on Thursday is I wanted to get there early so I went straight from work and I was still in my work clothes. I�m not trying to make excuses but it didn�t help.

Were you dressed like that NASA janitor nerd?

But for real, good on you bud. Give it your best.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CzgjglZqS3Y&t=37s

# ? Mar 28, 2023 00:39

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