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we don't pay people in beer anymore, instead, we give them paper that they can exchange for beer AFTER we tax those slips of paper!
OMFG FURRY fucked around with this message at 13:57 on Jul 14, 2023 |
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Jul 14, 2023 13:54
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Ok, so we took this special sand you see, and used it to draw special symbols on this green material made from very very old animal parts, and when we apply a controlled sort of lightning to it, suddenly we can use this to instantly tell merchants on the other side of the world to send us their goods, and
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Jul 14, 2023 13:57
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You call that a wheel?
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Jul 14, 2023 14:00
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Monster Magnet - Space Lord https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dscfeQOMuGw
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Jul 14, 2023 14:04
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Great news! Several artifacts and treasures from your time and homeland have survived. They're currently in this place called the British Museum. What? No, of course you can't have them back! Why not? Well, because
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Jul 14, 2023 14:10
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Tigey posted:Great news! Several artifacts and treasures from your time and homeland have survived. Those muthafucka's got like half of Assyria all jammed up in there.
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Jul 14, 2023 14:11
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You were unfortunately thawed out too late to enjoy Wheat Boy Summer
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Jul 14, 2023 14:31
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We taught rocks to think. Recently we taught the thinking rocks to draw they are getting pretty good at it actually but still not quiet there.
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Jul 14, 2023 14:42
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we dont let dogs drink first but we do think its funny you did. yes women still fart on their husbands lap somethings never change.
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Jul 14, 2023 14:46
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pixaal posted:We taught rocks to think. Recently we taught the thinking rocks to draw they are getting pretty good at it actually but still not quiet there. Most of the thinking rocks are controlled by our wealthiest men. It seems reasonable to assume they have our best interests at heart
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Jul 14, 2023 14:56
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"...so, everything is basically the same, except we don't use a stylus anymore"
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Jul 14, 2023 15:39
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redshirt posted:"...so, everything is basically the same, except we don't use a stylus anymore" "...... except for these special new technological devices we developed for artists called a tablet"
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Jul 14, 2023 15:42
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Frankly you aren’t missing much
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Jul 14, 2023 15:42
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sock it to me! posted:Notable fraudster Ea Nasir is still famous in our day for his poor quality copper. Close the loving thread and goldmine https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Complaint_tablet_to_Ea-n%C4%81%E1%B9%A3ir
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Jul 14, 2023 15:44
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Kahh-ren is unsatisfied with the copper he supplied and requests an audience with his overlord.
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Jul 14, 2023 15:54
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Why is this so hard to understand? He can't have those shoes because they are too large for him. They don't even fit! No, dogs don't wear shoes in our time. Well, not in summer anyways. That's not the point though...
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Jul 14, 2023 17:25
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Everything still sucks in many of the old ways and in new ways you can't even begin to comprehend yst.
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Jul 14, 2023 17:30
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Our powerful sages can predict the winds, rains, and temperatures days in advance. They can also tell of forthcoming storms and droughts. Sometimes they can even predict entire seasons or warmth or cool. How? Um... I think they use special light? Or is it special sound? And I think satellites, too, which are flying objects. How do they fly? Never mind. It's all magic.
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Jul 14, 2023 17:37
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The richest people in the future are people who carry inflated pig skin from one end of a field to another. Or an inflated ball of rubber from one wooden floor to the other end. Or a hand sized disk from one side of an ice rink to the other side. Or are born into it. The smartest and essential people in the future are paid very little and told to shut up when they ask for more.
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Jul 14, 2023 17:44
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happyhippy posted:The richest people in the future are people who carry inflated pig skin from one end of a field to another. Firstly, no athlete's wealth can compare to the various billionaires who own this and all that. Second, every athlete deserves every penny they are paid, as they are the ones creating the product that makes many hundreds of millions of dollars for others.
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Jul 14, 2023 17:46
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I would get Naram-Sin addicted to cigarettes
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Jul 14, 2023 18:44
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Have you heard about crystal meth
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Jul 14, 2023 18:56
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Okay so you see this square with 1/3 a pokemon on it? you eat it and an hour later you taste the sun and see time.
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Jul 14, 2023 19:04
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when you don’t need something anymore, put it in this bin and move it out by the road, and it will disappear where does it go? well, don’t worry about it, that’s for our children’s children’s children to figure out
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Jul 14, 2023 19:43
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QXy3uII-xn0
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Jul 14, 2023 19:44
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One of the cool things about modernity is that the only reason to do anything ever is if it’s profitable to do so, no exceptions no matter what the stakes.
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Jul 14, 2023 19:48
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BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:One of the cool things about modernity is that the only reason to do anything ever is if it’s profitable to do so, no exceptions no matter what the stakes. don’t be silly, greed isn’t the only reason we do things in the modern world, some people do things because they’re horny as well
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Jul 14, 2023 20:10
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Bad Purchase posted:don’t be silly, greed isn’t the only reason we do things in the modern world, some people do things because they’re horny as well "Greed is good" - Ronald Reagan "Wall Street"
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Jul 14, 2023 20:12
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It's a nice ziggurat and all, but you really need to add some hand rails and a wheelchair ramp ASAP. You're just begging for a lawsuit, bud.
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Jul 14, 2023 21:36
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Bad Purchase posted:when you don’t need something anymore, put it in this bin and move it out by the road, and it will disappear Hey, why are you guys leaving all these pottery pieces and clay tablets just in a hole over here? That's gonna be worth something some day.
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Jul 14, 2023 21:45
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"I know I look very basic for somebody 5000 summers into the future... and I apologize for that, but I bet I can beat you at checkers."
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Jul 15, 2023 03:36
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EVERY TIME GOING posted:"I know I look very basic for somebody 5000 summers into the future... and I apologize for that, but I bet I can beat you at checkers." The guy who wrote "Arrival" the movie has a collection of short stories...
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Jul 15, 2023 03:38
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EVERY TIME GOING posted:"I know I look very basic for somebody 5000 summers into the future... and I apologize for that, but I bet I can beat you at checkers." "Actually, standing in this close proximity to you, I'm now realizing we have both probably exposed each other to dozens of diseases for which we have no immunity. So... my bad."
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Jul 15, 2023 03:45
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*coughs to the side* "It's nothing, just a sore throat. So anyway I was telling your esteemed elder council about crop rotation... why, why am I able to see though my hand?"
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Jul 15, 2023 03:57
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Passed down a generation, I shall share with you a tradition introduced to us by one of our most renown scholars. Please, if you would be so kind, lower your head, bend down, and lean forward. Good! Now, look towards the heavens. Yes, it is indeed awkward to stand so, but you shall be cleverly rewarded! Finally you must open your mouth to receive your blessing. I shall now begin. Be prepared to taste the nectar of the gods. To honor this tradition it has been given a name. Remember it for it is called Wheezin the Ju'ice. Pulls lever
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Jul 15, 2023 05:53
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you wouldnt be so short if you adhered to a proper paleo diet huh? what do you mean 6 eggs for breakfast is absurd. no get that flatbread away from my face. its got wheat in it? jesus christ. oops spoiler alert. listen im done talking with you light up the charcoal and lets chop up that beef over there and get this weekend going. bring all the clay wine things. numberoneposter fucked around with this message at 06:27 on Jul 15, 2023 |
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Jul 15, 2023 06:23
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salt costs how much?!
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Jul 15, 2023 06:30
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There are parts of this world that will be familiar, there are parts that you won't be able to comprehend, not for awhile. There are still rich and poor. We've come to realize that the wealthy are just as foolish, or some cases more foolish than the poor. We no longer have kings but a good number of the very rich wish they were and that's very often a problem. Wars are just as cruel as in your day. We've had some in the last century of breathtaking scope that were just as violent as the Assyrian ones but on a far greater scale. Disease is better understood but in some ways your people were healthier than today. Care for women and children during childbirth is the greatest advance of the last few centuries. This world will be easier to understand if you realize that much of the work done by slaves in your time is now done by machines, created devices built for a task. The thing you're going to have a hard time adjusting to is the speed. You could write a message on a clay tablet and it would travel at walking speed for most of it's destination and back. We can send a written of visual message to the other side of the world in a matter of seconds. You were used to goods coming from Egypt or Greece. We can send food from those places to your lands and have it delivered before it spoiled. Proceeds to show AM around the house. We show him the bathroom, he explains that they had plumbing in Ur, just not as sophisticated as this. We show him the air conditioning, he explains the methods they had for cooling interior spaces. We show him the refrigerator, he explains how they would dig beneath houses to store food in a cool area. We turn on lights and he explains the candles they used for lighting, even demonstrating with his hands the way to protect the wick as you light it. We turn on a TV and he stares at it dumbfounded.
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Jul 15, 2023 06:34
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Darth Brooks posted:There are parts of this world that will be familiar, there are parts that you won't be able to comprehend, not for awhile. We call this Stargate SG1
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Jul 15, 2023 10:21
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redshirt posted:We call this Stargate SG1 we had something similar back in the day, it was called Wormhole X-treme
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Jul 15, 2023 10:28
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