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the holy poopacy
May 16, 2009

hey! check this out
Fun Shoe
One option is to just make a big pot of soup or w/e on the weekend and eat it for several days, with very simple sides/snacks/sandwiches/simple meals thrown in if you need a little variety. That way you just buy ingredients the day of/day before and don't have to sweat long term planning.

Another thing you can do is roast a whole chicken or beef/pork roast and then you've got a ton of precooked leftovers to throw into stir fry, soup, etc. with whatever veggies you have on hand (If you're doing this, just throw the already-cooked meat in at the end to warm up and absorb sauce, don't cook it again the whole time or it will get gross.)

Always keep carrots, onions, and celery stocked. They don't spoil quickly and they make lots of things taste delightful (even if you don't like them raw, don't skip them--it's quite different when they're chopped up and cooked as part of a larger dish.) They're foundational to a lot of European cooking for a reason.

EorayMel posted:

Always add more garlic and/or paprika to your dishes.

:hmmyes:

if the recipe says to add only 1 clove of garlic they are lying to you because they want to keep all the tasty food to themselves

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By popular demand
Jul 17, 2007

IT *BZZT* WASP ME--
IT WASP ME ALL *BZZT* ALONG!


Plenty of veggies can just be washed and put in the oven (olive oil, salt, pepper).
Baked succulents can be ground to a paste and added to anything or frozen for a later date.

By popular demand
Jul 17, 2007

IT *BZZT* WASP ME--
IT WASP ME ALL *BZZT* ALONG!


the holy poopacy posted:


if the recipe says to add only 1 clove of garlic they are lying to you because they want to keep all the tasty food to themselves

Or they're loving cowards who'll never know the joys of the stinking rose and die unloved.
:colbert:

zedprime
Jun 9, 2007

yospos
I haven't seen a beginners cooking technique book to recommend and I'm worried SEO has ruined the method that taught me around the turn of the decade 2010. But basically take an ingredient and a method and just Google it. "How do I cook broccoli in a frying pan." "How do I cook zucchini in the oven."

Combine that learning with some priming from more organized recipes and you can look in your big chest freezer of things and be like "it's curry time."

By popular demand
Jul 17, 2007

IT *BZZT* WASP ME--
IT WASP ME ALL *BZZT* ALONG!


My considered opinion is to buy a cooking encyclopaedia, doesn't have to be Larousse Gastronomic but you want something that'll teach you many cooking techniques rather than another recipe collection you'll never use because internet.

AARD VARKMAN
May 17, 1993
I make big quantities of things usually in the instant pot or sous vide or Dutch oven and just accept having to eat the same thing for days. It really doesn't bother me if it's something good, so I put a decent amount of effort in and cook a bunch.

AARD VARKMAN
May 17, 1993
i still throw away wilty lettuce every week though. some things just aren't sized for a single person unless that person really loves eating white bread sandwiches or whatever

Golden Bee
Dec 24, 2009

I came here to chew bubblegum and quote 'They Live', and I'm... at an impasse.

zedprime posted:

I haven't seen a beginners cooking technique book to recommend and I'm worried SEO has ruined the method that taught me around the turn of the decade 2010. But basically take an ingredient and a method and just Google it. "How do I cook broccoli in a frying pan." "How do I cook zucchini in the oven."

Combine that learning with some priming from more organized recipes and you can look in your big chest freezer of things and be like "it's curry time."

Alton Brown "I'm just here for the food"?

AARD VARKMAN posted:

i still throw away wilty lettuce every week though. some things just aren't sized for a single person unless that person really loves eating white bread sandwiches or whatever

Buy heads, not bags. They last easily 5x longer. And fun to stir fry with soy sauce!

Golden Bee
Dec 24, 2009

I came here to chew bubblegum and quote 'They Live', and I'm... at an impasse.
https://forums.somethingawful.com/forumdisplay.php?forumid=161

Ya'll need this

WithoutTheFezOn
Aug 28, 2005
Oh no

AARD VARKMAN posted:

i still throw away wilty lettuce every week though. some things just aren't sized for a single person unless that person really loves eating white bread sandwiches or whatever
Tip: Lettuce and mushrooms benefit greatly by lining the package with paper towels to absorb moisture.

111023
Nov 10, 2023

TrashMammal
Nov 10, 2022

OP—sounds like you learned how to follow some recipes, but haven’t really necessarily learned how to cook yet

if you really want to learn how to cook, you should focus on basic technique with staple flavoring ingredients. like, just learn how to cook mirepoix, or soffritto, or trinity or whatever the common base is for the sort of food you like and learn how to build meals on top of that

don’t keep a ton of spices and flavor building ingredients around, just the basics. some onions and/or garlic and peppers or whatever. just salt and pepper, or just some soy sauce, or whatever basic seasoning. figure out the basic-rear end-bitch setup for one style of food that you like and stick with that until you understand the ingredients

limit yourself to just a couple basic starches for a few months, such as potatoes and rice. cook them by the simplest recipe you can find until you can succeed without thinking about it. i’m talking stuff like plain white rice and boiled or roasted potatoes. keep it up and really pay attention. take in all of the smells, the noises, the feelings, the flavors. you’ll get really good at it before you know it

similarly, limit yourself to a few basic veggies. learn some super simple recipes for stuff like stir-fry cabbage or roasted brussels sprouts where all you’re adding is a bit of oil, salt, pepper, and heat

same again for proteins. don’t go crazy, limit your choices and stick with recipes that are basically meat or a meat-like-cruelty-free-product + your basic-rear end flavor enhancers

then start cooking lots of the same basic stuff over and over again. stick with the paradigm of starch/veggie/protein for your meals for now. might be frustrating at first, but keep on pushing. eventually you should have a breakthrough moment where you start to get it. the lights will turn on and you’ll understand flavors kind of how you understand language and you’ll have the skills you need to communicate those flavors through the medium of a home cooked meal

EorayMel
May 30, 2015

WE GET IT. YOU LOVE GUN JESUS. Toujours des fusils Bullpup Français.
OP just don't cook like this goon and you will already be significantly more successful:

MageMage posted:

As someone whose "done le cordon bleu thing", when you launch out into the industry, forget you ever made that.

And ditch the edible flower and did you use a broccoli stem for garde manger? That's just embarassing. If I ate that at a restaurant that served that as a special, I would ask the chef who thought of that to come out and taste it himself and tell me what he would think. And that is exactly what I am asking you?

If I ordered "special ramen" off a menu, and that was put in my face, where would I begin to eat it? Do I need a special utensil? Are those raw radishes? And the one on the left was cut, terribly, as well as the piece of pork it sits upon. Seriously, those radishes are raw, aren't they? And what is that on the right, a Belgian endive for a garnishy-eaty thingy? What is that white thing on top of the noodles? An egg? Seriously? And your consommé is very cloudy.

What kind of theme are you going for here? What exactly are those flavor profiles going to give to the tongue when your guest puts a spoonful of that into their mouth? Think ahead before you act. All garnish should be edible. Is that duck consommé? I bet it is. Why are you serving duck consommé with a beef dish? How is someone supposed to get that dish on a teaspoon? Or a tablespoon for that matter? It's too complicated.

I would make the noodles thick, soft, and slurpy. Cut the beef against the grain and in bite sizes uniformed in size and use an assortment of vegetables that look good. One piece of broccolli stem isnt going to cut it. And belgian endive dosen't count. Put other stuff in it; like your mirepoix? Carrots, celery, onion, and maybe some cilantro. Line the ingrediants up and rest the pork on top to give it height. Like I said, garnish has to be cooked, and it actually has to be in the dish, so if you have carrot in your ramen, garnish with a carrot rose or something.

The best advice I can give is what happened to me in Culinary School:

I was in garde manger 2, which I had found pretty difficult. It dealt with terrains and things like beef wellington and making that puree coloured stuff. Advanced poo poo. The Chef was this grouchy old man. Almost all of the Chefs that taught us we're grouchy old men or grouchy old women. But this one was mean. I was so afraid of messing up, because he worked us like a drill seargent.

You see, this was at the California Culinary in San Francisco, and if you'd ever been inside there, there are two classes that are in front of windows so that guests can view the students as they ate or toured, so the pressure was always on in that class.

One day we had to make like 120 of one item. This was with no help, you had to do it on your own, then, the best items went out for guests to sample and people who paid to eat etc. and you were critiqued on the results if you were picked. I had to make appetizers or whatever they were called in garde manger in a certain amount of time.

I panicked and could not think of anything. We didn't have the variety of assorted ingredients that other classes had. I took 120 shitake mushrooms, took the stems off, then in a bowl I mixed goat cheese, pine nuts, thyme, salt and white pepper, possibly undeglazed wine, and possibly other items I cant remember, probably the mushroom stems. I put this mixture on the inside of the cap and used the cap as a base for the appetizer. I made 2 sheet pans of 60.

The first sheet pan, I tried to grill the shitakes. I threw 30 on the grill. The guts weren't cooking and the mushrooms were burning and they were slipping through the grill from tongs and spatulas, trying to pick them up and keep them from burning, and causing a terrible, gooey mess all over the place. I spent way too much time on it, and in my panic to finish I thought I could cook the second sheet pan in the smoker. What the hell was I thinking?!

While I'm waiting for my appetizers to 'cook' in the smoker the Head Chef took note of me just waiting there and saw my 30 uncooked mushroom cap appetizers. He walks up to me and shouts, causing the whole kitchen to go silent:

"WHAT IS THIS?!"

"It's... uh...." I almost sheepishly said "I don't know" but before I could he grabs one of the monstrosities, he takes a bite of one, chews twice and then leans over to this right, and spits the piece back out onto the sheet pan it came from.

"IT'S YUCKY!!"

*...yucky?* I thought, like someone telling Spongebob his crabby patty was garbage.

He throws the other piece of mushroom down on the sheet pan like he just made a touchdown! He picked up the sheet pan, elongated with one hand on each side, then hurls the sheet pan and all down into the large garbage receptacle like he made a big slam dunk.

He storms off through the back entrance with his Sous chef to smoke a cigarette. I guess I really ticked him off. After that incident, I felt afraid to go back, and with a week left put in to switch to the morning chef and make it up. It took me a long time to realize what I had done wrong.

You have to keep things simple.

The first thing you have to do when you get out of culinary school is, forget everything you ever learned in culinary school. Have fun with it now, have fun with the unique ingredients, I know I sure did, but realize the end result of culinary school is to broaden your mind and focus it. Broadening it is fun, but you will have to focus inevitably.

VV get hosed freak :D

EorayMel fucked around with this message at 22:06 on Nov 10, 2023

111023
Nov 10, 2023


(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

sebmojo
Oct 23, 2010


Legit Cyberpunk









buglord posted:

With the help of Mark Bittman’s How to Cock Everything,

:pervert:

Flowers for QAnon
May 20, 2019

I’ve tried to get chatgpt to produce 5 distinct dishes that require the least amount of ingredients, but it never works :(

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007
Probation
Can't post for 4 hours!
How often do y'all cook using a recipe? I almost never do.

Luvcow
Jul 1, 2007

One day nearer spring

redshirt posted:

How often do y'all cook using a recipe? I almost never do.

every once in a while, when i want to try something new, otherwise i just cook the stuff i know how to cook and maybe tweak it a bit to see if i like it better. finding your own way to make something is fun. but again if i've never cooked something then i google recipes and try a few

Valko
Sep 18, 2015

Regarding carrots and soup:

If you are making a blended soup like tomato or carrot and coriander, go ahead. Just be careful about adding them to a broth or minestrone type thing. After 2 days in the fridge the carrots will start to break up, even disentegrate and it's not pleasant. It's also a good idea to boil pasta separately and keep it in a different container for minestrone. I've added elbow macaroni to soups to store in the fridge and came back to find something looking like mac and cheese - only red.

Buce
Dec 23, 2005

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007
Probation
Can't post for 4 hours!

That sure is a lot of food for one lady to eat.

sebmojo
Oct 23, 2010


Legit Cyberpunk









Marie doesn't gently caress around

Carlos Lantana
Oct 2, 2003

I'm really sorry, your avatar is giving me a boner and while that is perfectly OK and I don't want to kink shame anyone, its making me feel really weird getting a boner in a Trump thread.

Sincerely,

Jailbrekr
If you see cheap Tupperware grab it

Carlos Lantana
Oct 2, 2003

I'm really sorry, your avatar is giving me a boner and while that is perfectly OK and I don't want to kink shame anyone, its making me feel really weird getting a boner in a Trump thread.

Sincerely,

Jailbrekr
How to cock forty humans

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007
Probation
Can't post for 4 hours!

Carlos Lantana posted:

If you see cheap Tupperware grab it

Are you crazy?? I've got so much tupperware (or related products). I've got entire cabinets of nothing but. Too much tupperware!

Now, a nice set Pyrex containers....

Valko
Sep 18, 2015

Don't throw out plastic ice cream tubs either. Or those plastic dishes you get from the chinese takeaway.

Grey Cat
Jun 3, 2023

Doing stuff and things


Carlos Lantana posted:

How to cock forty humans

Only registered members can see post attachments!

111023_3
Nov 11, 2023

quote:

Sir, Brothels are illegal in the State of California
:goonsay:

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Luvcow
Jul 1, 2007

One day nearer spring

deep dish peat moss
Jul 27, 2006

zedprime posted:

There's two practical choices to cooking with perishables that depend where you are and what your capacity to go shopping is.

You either do a big shop and meal prep for 1week, up to 2-3 or more months, by cooking a shitload and freezing leftovers like homemade TV dinners.

Or you shop every 2-3 days.

Meal prepping is often looked down on by variety eaters but that's avoidable if you organize and do meal prep for a month, letting you alternate your home made TV dinners along with some staple meals.

As alluded to by others you can also just ignore perishables, get big bins of rice and noodles, and a pantry of canned fruits and veggies and a chest freezer of more fruits, veggies (learn which fruits and veggyirs can well like tomatoes vs freeze well like broccoli) and proteins, and just make varyingly combined rice and noodles dishes. 100s of different meals made of foods that don't go bad for years, turning into 1000s if you consider fresh accents like splurging on some eggs for fried rice or carbonara.

Meal prep is the way for single cooking

Make a nice chickpea curry base or whatever and separate it into 7 mason jars. That's 7 days of dinners. If you want to mix it up or add some variety you can cook some veggies or meat in it when you're ready to eat. Do something different every day!

Breakfast is easy to meal prep too. For example you can make Chia Pudding which is literally just putting some chia seeds and milk (real or nut-based or whatever) in a mason jar and letting it sit in the fridge overnight so the chia soaks up all the milk and gets swole and soft. Then you can cut up a little bit of fresh fruit in the morning and bammo, a healthy meal that tastes good for less than 5 mins of work.

oxyrosis
Aug 4, 2006
Scars are tattoos with better stories.
On Sunday I grab my whiteboard and plan out the next 5 days with the help of recipe blogs online. I try to use the same ingredients where I can for multiple days. Monday after work I buy the groceries and when it's dinner time, I don't really have much to worry about.



Once I started doing this I've pretty much eliminated going out to eat and as a bonus, I get to try lots of new dishes.

oxyrosis fucked around with this message at 21:57 on Mar 4, 2024

Nooner
Mar 26, 2011

AN A+ OPSTER (:
Buy everything fresh the day you plan to make it

bradzilla
Oct 15, 2004

make meals, put leftovers into containers for meals to have for a few days (how long you can stand eating the same thing minus one day), freeze the rest. heat up the frozen stuff when you need something to fill in.

Haverchuck
May 6, 2005

the coolest
get a chest freezer if you dont have one and your situation allows

Verdugo
Jan 5, 2009


Lipstick Apathy

buglord posted:

With the help of Mark Bittman’s How to Cock Everything,

I'm not eating at your house.

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007
Probation
Can't post for 4 hours!

Haverchuck posted:

get a chest freezer if you dont have one and your situation allows

Big old tittie freezer

von Braun
Oct 30, 2009


Broder Daniel Forever
theres a thing called a freezer that is great to keep cookes food in. look it up

MoonshineWilly
Feb 7, 2007

Damn you, harlot! Science and I know what we're doing!
Soups are a great way to use up excess vegetables. Get a crock pot and throw a pound of meat in there, add water to cover the meat, and start dumping in vegetables. Experiment with different mixes. You can add rice and/or beans too. Beef tends to make thicker broth, but any meat will work. Cover the vegetables with water, and Let it cook in the crock pot (4-6 hours or all day on low heat). If you’re cooking it all day, add more water; if you’re cooking it for shorter periods, you can check the water level every now and then. Start with a smaller batch until you figure out how much you can eat in a couple days and then make more if needed.

Be prepared to make some really good foods and some really nasty food. Toss out the gross stuff and learn from it.

Booty Pageant
Apr 20, 2012
batter and deep frying provide a dry exterior crust that helps to prevent spoilage and locks flavour in

therefore op should get an industrial deep fryer

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redshirt
Aug 11, 2007
Probation
Can't post for 4 hours!
Just lower your standards OP. You'll be fine.

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