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Shneak
Mar 6, 2015

A sad Professor Plum
sitting on a toilet.
I love reading and writing these lists in Games and TVIV - glad to see an edition here. When's the deadline?

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Shneak
Mar 6, 2015

A sad Professor Plum
sitting on a toilet.
I'm going to limit my rankings to 2023 releases to make it more current.

10. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3

An MCU movie in my top ten?? To be fair, Ant-Man Quantumania is easily the worst of the year. Perfectly balanced.

Vol. 3 is a lot more like Vol. 1 (complimentary) than Vol. 2 (derogatory). Something that's been lacking in Marvel's foray into space is interesting sci-fi production and character design. They finally understood the assignment here. The settings are interesting, I loved the biological cosmic office. The aliens look memorable and weird. And the body horror is kinda nasty!! Nebula continues to be the best character to grace the MCU. Rocket Raccoon's character arc was fantastic. The "I bet we were fun" moment between Gamora and Peter destroyed me. This movie felt like the last vestiges of investment I have in the old guard of Marvel and it was a liberating ending—I mean, it literally ends in a Florence + The Machine needledrop. I don't think I need to see a new Guardians movie starring a child in a Sia wig, I'm satisfied.


9. Elemental

I think I’m a Pixar apologist at this point. Most people think they’ve fallen off in the past 5 years but I liked Toy Story 4, Soul, Turning Red, and Luca is honestly one of my faves. (We’re going to pretend Onward never happened and I haven’t seen Lightyear). When I finally got around to (apprehensively) watch Elemental I was kind of annoyed. The slander campaign worked on me, this is a great movie! It was so tinder and hearthwarming. The weakest part was the relationship plot. I think they even managed to include a cheesy "our chemistries don't mix!" line. This story all happening over the course of a week makes it seem like weird love bombing behaviour. That being said, they did have cute banter. I wasn't expecting the extra world-building and that's where this movie gets interesting. Fire being segregated immigrants, the city infrastructure affirming water privilege, etc are all allegories I liked. Adapting a story about a child inheriting a parent's job isn't seen often and I thought Pixar handled that beautifully.


8. Past Lives

“This is where I ended up.” “Okay.”

Thought this movie wasn’t going to hit me the same way as it did everybody else until I was hunched over the kitchen sink, eating Cheez Whiz, and crying 5 minutes after it ended.


7. Falcon Lake

A coming of age ghost story in lakeside Québec captured on dreamy film with a soundtrack set to summery cicadas? This movie was made for me! (I’m one of the 3 people who have seen this)


6. May December

Darkly camp and has the funniest ending since TAR last year. Personally I’m thrilled that we’re living in an era where actors fresh out of their Riverdale contract can out-act legends like Natalie Portman and Julianne Moore.


5. Skinamarink

Skinamarink spawned the most controversial horror movie discourse I’ve ever seen. You either love it or hate it, and if you love it you need to justify why. Well I loved it and I’ll tell you why. Skinamarink best depicted a childhood experience that I’ve never seen done before. Did you ever wake up in your childhood bedroom in the middle of the night, knowing instantly that you’re the only one awake in the house? You look at the popcorn ceiling and see fuzzy vibrations. Are they spiders or a trick of the eye? Suddenly the house creeks. Is there someone in the hallway? You think you see a shadow move below your bedroom door crack and you cover your face with your bedsheets. That feeling is what Skinamarink captures. Sure, it has a lot of camera shots at random ceilings and walls but it’s the unpredictability of your mind trying to predict what comes next that makes the experience. I love horror movies but they don’t really scare me much anymore. This was terrifying. The sound design is truly one of the best of the year and had me feeling sick to my stomach. Skinamarink had me hiding behind my sheets again.


4. No Hard Feelings

Maybe it’s the comedy genre dark ages we are in right now but Jennifer Lawrence is an incredible physical comedian. You put her in a chinese finger trap and expect me not to cry laughing?


3. Renaissance: A Film by Beyoncé

This was my favourite concert experience I’ve been to so far and I got to experience it all again. I left with more questions than answers regarding ~the visuals~ of Act I but it's a loving spectacle all the same. Give the editors a Christmas bonus for putting this together so quickly and ESPECIALLY for that Alien Superstar fakeout.


2. The Holdovers

Watching horror movies during October is a yearly tradition but I don't share the same excitement for Christmas movies. I just watch Christmas Vacation and The Grinch and repeat for years forever and ever. Every new release feels more and more disposable, but we were blessed this year. God I love a movie where two assholes become slightly less rear end in a top hat-ish and respect each other’s game. If this is an awards season contender and there’s any justice then I hope Paul Giamatti and Da’Vine Joy Randolph clean up trophies and the academy rightfully nominates Dominic Sessa. Happy New Year!


1. Godzilla Minus One

Imagine being Christopher Nolan watching this and realizing your biopic about the atom bomb inventor only has the 2nd best nuclear explosion of the year.

It really cannot be emphasized how good Minus One looks for this cheap, I just know those VFX artists were overworked to hell and back. I like that they tried to do new things with a pure evil Godzilla and compressing/decompressing him to kill him. The relationship dynamics with Shikishima are pretty endearing and that in itself makes it top percentile of human plots in Godzilla. Like, an American take would have the next door neighbour be a vicious drunk and get killed off violently. Here everybody has flaws but are working on being better to survive. I’m a kaiju movie thread regular but that makes me more critical when it comes to Godzilla—only positive things to say about my number one.

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