UFC/MMA January: a power fantasy for ignorant pieces of shit

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Hammer House: Stinger Splash Zone > UFC/MMA January: a power fantasy for ignorant pieces of shit

Which rumored fight are you most looking forward to in 2024? This poll is closed.
Alex Pereira vs Tom Aspinall for the Heavyweight title	4	8.89%
Conor McGregor vs Michael Chandler at Middleweight	0	0%
Francis Ngannou vs Ryan Bader to break the sport's skull ejection record	8	17.78%
Manny Pacquiao vs Floyd Mayweather Jr. in some kind of amateur MMA match	1	2.22%
Jon Jones vs Stipe Miocic in a double retirement bout	4	8.89%
The UFC vs The American Legal System in an antitrust fight	28	62.22%
Total:	45 votes

[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

There was this initial story to the Duplessis x Strickland brawl, but it wasn�t quite as bare-minimum courtesy as it initially came off, ABs that I�m sure the UFC promoted

https://www.mmafighting.com/2023/12/19/24007600/gilbert-burns-wife-reacts-sean-strickland-dricus-du-plessis-ufc-296-brawl

# ¿ Jan 1, 2024 21:51

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# ¿ May 13, 2024 23:08

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

I too wish for a controversial Muslim force to defeat Israel.

# ¿ Jan 2, 2024 10:27

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

My fave image from the year

# ¿ Jan 2, 2024 21:06

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

MMA is regressing to the Rousimar Palhares 5'7" 180lb mean.

# ¿ Jan 4, 2024 17:40

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

LobsterMobster posted:

Thats why I liked when boxing would measure from the shoulder to the end of the fist for reach

Broad shoulders do matter, not only for reach (since tilting your shoulder into a punch to the same angle produces more shifting of the shoulder) but also for power. I'd say wingspan and arm length together are quite informative for boxing.

# ¿ Jan 5, 2024 18:25

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

https://www.mmafighting.com/2024/1/6/24025905/unsealed-ufc-docs-show-dana-whites-reaction-to-cm-punk-salary-backlash
Even under oath, Dana is boundlessly petty

quote:

admittedly hopped up on an energy drink � �I�m getting crazy over here,� White declared after a brief spat with the plaintiff�s attorney � he struggled to remember the name.

�It just happened recently again, too,� White said in the deposition. �We had some guy that was � that was paid a certain amount of money and never � oh, the professional wrestler that we brought in. Not Brock [Lesnar], the other one.�

�CM Punk?� the attorney asked.

�Oh, yeah,� White replied. �People went crazy when they saw what he got paid. ... Even the women.�

# ¿ Jan 8, 2024 08:46

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

Dana announced Zhang Weili x Yan Xiaonan for UFC 300 and teased a couple more title fights.

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C18yK42JrkQ/?igsh=aXQxdmpwYWJjbHNt

# ¿ Jan 11, 2024 10:45

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

Must hurt a little when people don't read the big event writeups.

# ¿ Jan 11, 2024 17:19

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

TheKingslayer posted:

In Vegas instead of China? Lmao

This kind of poo poo should be evidence enough in court that these guys aren't some kind promotional geniuses. Just dumb assholes coasting on monopoly power.

On the surface, it's nice that they wanted a big deal title fight for 300, but that's just dumb and glib instead of offsetting some time into 2024 (after it's the Year of the Dragon for better promo art) and having a blowout event in China.

# ¿ Jan 11, 2024 19:09

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

Shumagorath posted:

An event in China probably means M-1 style co-promotion which the UFC is making one of their few wise moves to avoid.

The Shanghai event planned for last Nov got canceled for "logistical reasons." I haven't found any details, but it certainly didn't seem like a turf war.

Which other promotion do you think would be involved?

# ¿ Jan 11, 2024 20:31

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

One thing I�ll begrudge anyone from the new crop of Dana�s favorites is that Sean O�malley trains pretty smart. Not like

# ¿ Jan 11, 2024 23:22

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

I had never seen this particular example of Johnny Walker�s chinniness
https://youtu.be/xHDh41gl5q0?si=UjM_hhelj3gPjykM
His wake-up after the second knockdown is insane.

E: and calling it a chin problem is unfair. Bad defense followed by his brain operating in safe mode while the ref dithers.

# ¿ Jan 15, 2024 08:32

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

Irish fighter got a devastating life changing spine injury

https://twitter.com/leahmccourtmma/status/1746282213098848271
Conor did the bare minimum decent thing and amplified the gofundme. Decent thing would be to just pay for his treatment, I suppose.

# ¿ Jan 16, 2024 09:27

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

Luke Thomas said of that rant:
Everything about MMA sucks except for the fight themselves. Absolutely everything.

Get him an account already.

# ¿ Jan 18, 2024 06:53

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

They look dry as gently caress, drat

https://www.threads.net/@mmajunkie/post/C2SQrdiM6xG/

# ¿ Jan 19, 2024 23:01

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

BlindSite posted:

"we�re Africa born, we�re Africa raised, we still reside in Africa"
you can't be from a place if you have a skin colour he decides is wrong

hmmmmm, wonder how he got there. hmmmmm

# ¿ Jan 20, 2024 06:05

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

COPE 27 posted:

How did white Americans get there?

Oh, did you not learn in history class? Maybe you had one of the textbooks published for the South.

# ¿ Jan 20, 2024 17:04

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

AndyElusive posted:

Algorithm sends me this clip today:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rGMQXNUpJo8

Man, gently caress Strickland. I hope Du Plessis annihilates this clown.

I don't think he will, but I hope I'm wrong as poo poo.

I try really hard to block channels that have nazi slanted takes like that, but the algorithm is relentless.

# ¿ Jan 21, 2024 00:30

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

https://www.threads.net/@lukethomasnews/post/C2amzU0pT2j/
Maybe not the most efficient way to learn:
- the UFC censored Makhachev�s message of Palestinian solidarity out of a rebroadcast, and ESPN/Disney just let it happen
- there were LGB chants at Toronto, lol

# ¿ Jan 23, 2024 01:03

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

Surprised at the reign lengths for Leon and Volk

# ¿ Jan 24, 2024 07:52

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

CarlCX posted:

So people found it suspicious that John Lineker weighed in (at lightweight!) yesterday for what was stated to be an unspecified, general-purposes alternate slot, and one fight into ONE's pay-per-view, they announced Sage Northcutt was out due to issues with his cornerman, and Shinya Aoki was going to fight John Lineker instead.

I am continually impressed by how ONE manages to be more shady than the UFC. It's not fuckin' easy. I hope I wake up to Lineker having a lightweight win.

How many other 155 fights were there? It seems hard to believe that ONE has the political capital to have someone held up at customs. If his team got paid to parrot some line, I'm sure Sage would be the right mix of naive and compliant to go along with it. That's how all those roids got in him, surely.

# ¿ Jan 28, 2024 16:07

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

LobsterMobster posted:

Hell, up until like last week ONE was saying Rodtang was going to fight Takeru when everyone else knew he was hurt and that Superlek was going to take his place. Even Takeru's team was doubtful they were fighting Rodtang.

This implies, worryingly, that One thinks Sage is a draw.

# ¿ Jan 28, 2024 22:10

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# ¿ May 13, 2024 23:08

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

CarlCX posted:

WELTERWEIGHT: Randy Brown (17-5) vs Muslim Salikhov (19-4)

This is my favorite kind of fight: One I already wrote several months ago. Randy Brown and Muslim Salikhov were supposed to fight on the prelims of the sin-cursed card that was Leon Edwards vs Colby Covington last December, but Brown fell ill 48 hours beforehand and the fight had to be cancelled. For as much as the UFC complains about the perception that Apex cards are less important or less stacked than any of their other cards, it sure is telling that a prelim-opener from just six weeks ago is suddenly a top-of-the-main-card fight, but, y'know, gently caress the fans. I give you Carl circa the halcyon days of last December.

Randy Brown has been so close to a top fifteen ranking that the UFC actually used him to springboard rising star Jack Della Maddalena into the rankings at the start of 2023. It makes sense; Brown's tall and rangy and dangerous as hell, but the UFC's also seen him just fail to crack the ceiling and break out of the dreaded 'he's got so much potential' damning-with-faint-praise status three times, now, and eventually, they start feeding you to people. Muslim Salikhov is on his own first real run-in with the glass ceiling. He, too, had a great five-fight winning streak that got him to the cusp of the rankings, and he, too, got blown out of the water by Li Jingliang, ending his hopes on the spot. He's 1-1 since, having joined the long line of UFC fighters who knocked out Andre Fialho but failed to get past the somehow-once-again-relevant Nicolas Dalby this past June. One of them will consume the other's momentum and return to grace; one will be cast into the pit.

The betting lines pretty steadily favor Randy Brown, and I get why. He's got a huge size and reach advantage and Muslim's difficulty with clinch grappling like Randy's gets him in trouble. But, as I write this, I am delirious with fever, and in my dreams I see Salikhov striking through Randy's sometimes loose hands and unexpectedly taking him out. My dreams also tell me to call all of my exes and move to Norway, so I do not recommend you bet accordingly, but I, personally, have no choice but to obey the inscrutable exhortations of my soul. MUSLIM SALIKHOV BY TKO.

It would be a cool win by Salikhov, but I think it's unlikely. Randy Brown's striking is indeed suspect, but I think Salikhov just has too much age in the legs at this point. He was never super fast or strong, but managed to do well revving out 2nd gear with a crafty striking and throwing game*. I think Brown should strive for a Leech type game plan. Just wait to land stronger punches and stay relatively disengaged.

*Speaking of sanshou, vlogger Sensei Seth went to train with the US Sanda team. This video shows some flavor of the throws and covers how it's scored.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=86RUX0jSDAs
My record against fighters shown in this video is 0-2, and it is with insane jealousy that I report that both of them medaled at Worlds this past summer.

kimbo305 fucked around with this message at 07:05 on Feb 1, 2024

# ¿ Feb 1, 2024 07:01

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Hammer House: Stinger Splash Zone > UFC/MMA January: a power fantasy for ignorant pieces of shit