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Cornwind Evil posted:I've thought of a short story idea where there's an interdimensional agency that gets hired by people to go kill certain people in ways that look like tragic accidents in as many timelines as possible before they do the things that ruin their image forever; kill OJ before he commits his murders, kill Rudy Guilani in 2002 before he pisses away all the goodwill he got from 9/11, deserved or not, kill Michael Jackson shortly after Thriller (no idea when the child molestation started so I just said that), etc. So while in the core timeline all that happened, in many other alternate timelines it doesn't. we just got hired to delete ur system32 before u made that post
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Jan 31, 2024 23:57
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Vampire Panties posted:
uhhhh pretty sure that this is the plot of the showtime series billions the moral of that story is that it's okay to make money off tragedy as long as you buy your childhood pizza place so that the old man running it can continue making your favorite pizza forever
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Feb 1, 2024 08:49
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I genuinely wasn't expecting a "let it happen and make money off it" approach in this shitpost thread
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Cornwind Evil posted:I've thought of a short story idea where there's an interdimensional agency that gets hired by people to go kill certain people in ways that look like tragic accidents in as many timelines as possible before they do the things that ruin their image forever; kill OJ before he commits his murders, kill Rudy Guilani in 2002 before he pisses away all the goodwill he got from 9/11, deserved or not, kill Michael Jackson shortly after Thriller (no idea when the child molestation started so I just said that), etc. So while in the core timeline all that happened, in many other alternate timelines it doesn't. uhhhhh pretty sure that this is the plot to notable universal pictures film the adjustment bureau the moral of that story is definitely do not drink coffee from a convenience store cup while riding public transit, you're just asking for trouble
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Feb 1, 2024 08:54
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Id post a bunch about it on the 10th on MySpace. This will change nothing.
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Feb 1, 2024 09:12
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I'd replace the hijackers with extremely Caucasian Christian nationalists and have them continue on with the rest of the plan 😈 Also I wouldn't let McDonald's get rid of super size fries n drink and it would always be .39c
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Feb 1, 2024 09:31
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Phrasing it as "make money off the tragedy" makes it sound like I'd exploit aspects of 9/11 for my own benefit like so many other assholes and POS did. It is a technically correct sentence, but my intent is wholly the opposite. I don't want to exploit a tragedy to enrich myself, I want to compensate for the fact that I cannot in any proper way prevent a tragedy and the pain it will cause, so the best option is to try and lessen pain and tragedy elsewhere by any other means that I can.postmodifier posted:uhhhhh pretty sure that this is the plot to notable universal pictures film the adjustment bureau Checking the plot, sort of, but in the opposite sense. Adjustment Bureau is about 'one sole timeline and everything needs to be carefully managed by otherworldly forces to happen as planned', whereas the idea is 'make things did not happen as planned in other, 'lesser' timelines to salvage the reputation of people'. Also, I would advise going to the front page of SA, blow off the dust, and search for the Society of Amateur Time Travellers articles. They're pretty amusing and in line with this discussion.
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Feb 2, 2024 03:14
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Set the machine for 1996, attend a taping of 'The Montel Williams Show' with special guest star Syliva Brown Give Sylvia a list of future events and championship winners for 1996, promise to see her again next year Set the machine for 1997, attend a taping of 'The Montel Williams Show' with special guest star Syliva Brown, etc while I'm at it, tell Montel he has MS but that pretty soon he'll be loving the future Vice President. Keep this going for a few years to build up the relationship and build up her credibility. By the time New Years Eve Y2K comes around, I can reveal through her to a syndicate nationwide audience the terrible truth of 9/11
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Feb 2, 2024 03:49
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go back to that one bottleneck in the fossil record where they say humanity's numbers dwindled to like under 2k and we almost went extinct. travel back to then and take everyone out, over the course of a month, with a johnny five type robot that has a flamethrower. leave no one alive. 9/11 averted
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Feb 2, 2024 05:22
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kntfkr posted:go back to that one bottleneck in the fossil record where they say humanity's numbers dwindled to like under 2k and we almost went extinct. travel back to then and take everyone out, over the course of a month, with a johnny five type robot that has a flamethrower. leave no one alive. 9/11 averted 
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Feb 2, 2024 05:34
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You guys are thinking small I'd go back to 9/10/2001 and buy a lot of gas, fill up all the containers, cups, jars, whatever, and sell that poo poo on 9/12
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Feb 2, 2024 06:43
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kntfkr posted:go back to that one bottleneck in the fossil record where they say humanity's numbers dwindled to like under 2k and we almost went extinct. travel back to then and take everyone out, over the course of a month, with a johnny five type robot that has a flamethrower. leave no one alive. 9/11 averted lotta siblings stuck in washing machines during the Toba catastrophe
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Feb 2, 2024 06:46
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The Timecop movie had the interesting premise of a police force created to keep people from changing the past.
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Feb 2, 2024 06:50
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I'd try to vaccinate the indigenous populations living in the Americas. Preventing one of the worst genocides in human history would result in the Wright Brothers never being born.
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Feb 2, 2024 07:54
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KPC_Mammon posted:I'd try to vaccinate the indigenous populations living in the Americas. Preventing one of the worst genocides in human history would result in the Wright Brothers never being born. Honestly, I doubt preventing the smallpox would make much difference by the 20th century. I'm sure we would have managed to almost entirely wipe them out anyway through other methods.
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Feb 2, 2024 08:01
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In NA the spread of multiple plagues was significantly faster than European settlers, to the point where they often ended up in postapocalyptic regions where 90% of the preexisting population had been dead for years. Really tho going back to vaccinate them from our current timeline is just gonna give all of past North America covid as well as the other plagues. that's an amateur hour time travel mistake.
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Feb 2, 2024 08:08
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I think I read somewhere that the reason European diseases just utterly ripped through native populations is because Europeans were just innately 'filthier' in how they lived and hence over the centuries and eons as human civilization went up and down across that continent, all that innate 'being filthier' caused them to get more exposed to more viral poo poo and they developed a sort of general better resistance due to it (in the sense that extended plagues would kill 25 percent of the population instead of 90), while the natives had a 'cleaner' life and hence the people in general had weaker immune systems, and hence when Europeans showed up with their smallpox and malaria and yellow fever and measles and all that it was a hot knife through butter. I also think it was suggested that if you went back in time to around, say...800 or so? And released some strains of flu or something incredibly contagious into the Americas, that by the time Europeans started coming over in large numbers, the peoples of both continents would have managed even in that brief time period to develop better immune systems and it would have hurt them less. Wouldn't have done a drat thing for the European's genocide, but it would have made their task in 'This is all mine now' a lot harder. (And that's a sad thing. Even if the world was opposite and Europeans came over to America and went "Wow, another culture of humans, let's learn from each other and improve each other's lives from our different experiences.", the Natives STILL would have been decimated by disease, because no one then had any real drat clue how disease worked)
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Feb 2, 2024 08:38
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sure okay posted:Piss in the fuel tanks to delay the flights Sure, this prevents Don McLean from writing American Pie and thus Weird Al from writing The Saga Begins, but it's a price that will be paid.
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Feb 2, 2024 08:44
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KPC_Mammon posted:I'd try to vaccinate the indigenous populations living in the Americas. Preventing one of the worst genocides in human history would result in the Wright Brothers never being born. I'd want to build up a techno priesthood jealously guarding secrets of limited industrialization and maintaining a fleet of armored cruisers to prevent the mistakes of white people loving up the planet. Columbus and all other european colonial invaders, slavers and exploiters should be met with 12 inch guns where-ever they go. A global network of spies will be keeping an eye out for nerds getting dangerously close to figuring out steam engines and other precursors of mass-industrialization. frumpykvetchbot fucked around with this message at 09:26 on Feb 2, 2024 |
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Feb 2, 2024 09:24
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credburn posted:But how? aint gonna have done it
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Feb 2, 2024 09:25
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frumpykvetchbot posted:I'd want to build up a techno priesthood jealously guarding secrets of limited industrialization and maintaining a fleet of armored cruisers to prevent the mistakes of white people loving up the planet. Sounds like the Aztec Empire would thrive under those conditions. Wow you must really like human sacrifices, huh? 
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Feb 2, 2024 14:05
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Cornwind Evil posted:I think I read somewhere that the reason European diseases just utterly ripped through native populations is because Europeans were just innately 'filthier' in how they lived and hence over the centuries and eons as human civilization went up and down across that continent, all that innate 'being filthier' caused them to get more exposed to more viral poo poo and they developed a sort of general better resistance due to it (in the sense that extended plagues would kill 25 percent of the population instead of 90), while the natives had a 'cleaner' life and hence the people in general had weaker immune systems, and hence when Europeans showed up with their smallpox and malaria and yellow fever and measles and all that it was a hot knife through butter. lol gonna need a source on this wtf. sounds like some noble savages bullshit
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Feb 2, 2024 14:10
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The Europeans had farm animals which meant they spent more time around different diseases than were endemic to these animals. The link between Cowpox and Smallpox is pretty famous. They also had been exposed to everything coming out of the other continents as diseases traveled trade routes. NA were exposed to none of that.
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Feb 2, 2024 14:19
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Cornwind Evil posted:I think I read somewhere that the reason European diseases just utterly ripped through native populations is because Europeans were just innately 'filthier' in how they lived and hence over the centuries and eons as human civilization went up and down across that continent, all that innate 'being filthier' caused them to get more exposed to more viral poo poo and they developed a sort of general better resistance due to it (in the sense that extended plagues would kill 25 percent of the population instead of 90), while the natives had a 'cleaner' life and hence the people in general had weaker immune systems, and hence when Europeans showed up with their smallpox and malaria and yellow fever and measles and all that it was a hot knife through butter. Lol that’s not how immunity works op
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Feb 2, 2024 14:24
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Man I need to reread A Canticle for Liebowitz
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Feb 2, 2024 14:34
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free hubcaps posted:Man I need to reread A Canticle for Liebowitz great book. just reread a couple weeks ago
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Feb 2, 2024 14:37
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hot cocoa on the couch posted:great book. just reread a couple weeks ago Nice. I'm about due for a re-read.
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Feb 2, 2024 15:20
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what if they did have a time machine at one point but they wasted it convincing hitler to have a funny mustache
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Feb 3, 2024 04:42
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I mean if you want a really good book on it Guns , Germs, and Steel is right there and its pretty decent. I enjoyed it and it gave me some really good insights. He basically has the same point that Europeans spent all their time around farm animals and developed immunities to a lot of disease because of that.
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Feb 3, 2024 04:50
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I don't feel morally obligated to stop any negative event in history except I would assassinate Stalin in his youth, merely so I wouldn't have to listen to authoritarian leftists attempt to defend his record in the present.
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Feb 3, 2024 04:51
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I’d go back and suck Adam’s dick so good he turned gay
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Feb 3, 2024 07:38
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Worf posted:I’d go back and suck Adam’s dick so good he turned gay 
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Feb 3, 2024 08:00
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I'd give the Native Americans advanced knowledge and technology so they could conquer the world.Worf posted:I’d go back and suck Adam’s dick so good he turned gay Also a viable option.
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Feb 3, 2024 08:02
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Mr.Pibbleton posted:I'd give the Native Americans advanced knowledge and technology so they could conquer the world. Oh, so YOU created that world seen in the comic book Black Science (Issues 2 and 3).
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Feb 4, 2024 02:42
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funny enough only 1 tower was originally hit, after a few iterations we've been able to achieve a higher yield but deterministic chaos seems to keep us at bay
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Feb 4, 2024 08:29
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What if you just went back to watch, and to record some wicked excellent video?
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Feb 4, 2024 13:54
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If I had a time machine I'd go back and kick my own rear end.
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Feb 4, 2024 14:10
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I'd go back to some Civil War battle with body armor and dual wielding Uzis and just cut loving loose, then return to the future to see what the gently caress THAT does.
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Feb 5, 2024 01:46
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The Bible posted:I'd go back to some Civil War battle with body armor and dual wielding Uzis and just cut loving loose, then return to the future to see what the gently caress THAT does. That's almost literally the opening scene from timecop.
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Feb 5, 2024 03:00
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The Bible posted:I'd go back to some Civil War battle with body armor and dual wielding Uzis and just cut loving loose, then return to the future to see what the gently caress THAT does. You run out of ammo fast. Then what?
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Feb 5, 2024 03:01
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redshirt posted:You run out of ammo fast. Then what? I guess that's when I go back. Maybe research guns. cult_hero posted:That's almost literally the opening scene from timecop. poo poo, really? I didn't see it. How did it turn out?
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Feb 5, 2024 03:27
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