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mbt
Aug 13, 2012

That Little Demon posted:

[absent minded pervert of the DND group] Oh this campaign is so boring guys cmon..

DM: you encounter 3 crawling claws

Pervert: :D



oohhh noo, roll to see if they all jack me off!


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herculon
Sep 7, 2018

That Little Demon posted:

[absent minded pervert of the DND group] Oh this campaign is so boring guys cmon..

DM: you encounter 3 crawling claws

Pervert: :D



oohhh noo, roll to see if they all jack me off!

mbt
Aug 13, 2012

[reading directly from rulebook]
and before you roll that know that i am knocked prone, taken by surprise, under the effect of a blind spell, affected by faerie fire, and have negative armor class.


That Little Demon
Dec 3, 2020

mbt posted:

[reading directly from rulebook]
and before you roll that know that i am knocked prone, taken by surprise, under the effect of a blind spell, affected by faerie fire, and have negative armor class.

lmfao

Leadthumb
Mar 24, 2006

Fungah! posted:

*loudly into an empty room* SURE WOULD BE A SHAME IF A SEXY CONSENTING ALIVE OF AGE FEMALE DRYAD SHOWED UP


That Little Demon posted:

[absent minded pervert of the DND group] Oh this campaign is so boring guys cmon..

DM: you encounter 3 crawling claws

Pervert: :D



oohhh noo, roll to see if they all jack me off!


mbt posted:

[reading directly from rulebook]
and before you roll that know that i am knocked prone, taken by surprise, under the effect of a blind spell, affected by faerie fire, and have negative armor class.

lmao




PS this post is impervious to Flames because of the flame proofer. :)

Fungah!
Apr 30, 2011

mbt posted:

[reading directly from rulebook]
and before you roll that know that i am knocked prone, taken by surprise, under the effect of a blind spell, affected by faerie fire, and have negative armor class.

Pablo Nergigante
Apr 16, 2002

That Little Demon posted:

[absent minded pervert of the DND group] Oh this campaign is so boring guys cmon..

DM: you encounter 3 crawling claws

Pervert: :D



oohhh noo, roll to see if they all jack me off!

Lmao

Pablo Nergigante
Apr 16, 2002

DM: You have disadvantage on this roll
Me: Oh… I know

Jenny Agutter
Mar 18, 2009

mbt posted:

[reading directly from rulebook]
and before you roll that know that i am knocked prone, taken by surprise, under the effect of a blind spell, affected by faerie fire, and have negative armor class.

lmao

Good soup!
Nov 2, 2010

That Little Demon posted:

[absent minded pervert of the DND group] Oh this campaign is so boring guys cmon..

DM: you encounter 3 crawling claws

Pervert: :D



oohhh noo, roll to see if they all jack me off!

Fungah!
Apr 30, 2011

Pablo Nergigante posted:

DM: You have disadvantage on this roll
Me: Oh… I know

Fungah!
Apr 30, 2011

level 1 dungeons and dragons monster I can kill:

Nutmeg
Feb 8, 2004

Pablo Nergigante posted:

DM: You have disadvantage on this roll
Me: Oh… I know

STING 64
Oct 20, 2006

Pablo Nergigante posted:

DM: You have disadvantage on this roll
Me: Oh… I know

actual jumpscare

Dongicus
Jun 12, 2015

Fungah! posted:

level 1 dungeons and dragons monster I can kill:



killing like 5 of these and spawning the raid boss

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welcome
Jun 28, 2002

rail slut

That Little Demon posted:

[absent minded pervert of the DND group] Oh this campaign is so boring guys cmon..

DM: you encounter 3 crawling claws

Pervert: :D



oohhh noo, roll to see if they all jack me off!

Lol

Fungah!
Apr 30, 2011

Dongicus posted:

killing like 5 of these and spawning the raid boss


Pablo Nergigante
Apr 16, 2002

Fungah! posted:

level 1 dungeons and dragons monster I can kill:




Dongicus posted:

killing like 5 of these and spawning the raid boss


tmfc
Sep 28, 2006

Fungah! posted:

hey tmfc you wanna get a beer?

sure

tmfc
Sep 28, 2006


strangle

That Little Demon posted:

dude has a painters palette for a shield... cmon

strangle


step or sit on


pick up and hurl at the ground


crush and pulverize between my rear end cheeks


strangle

Dongicus posted:

killing like 5 of these and spawning the raid boss



strangle

also lmfao at everything

Wormskull
Aug 23, 2009

tmfc posted:

strangle

strangle

step or sit on

pick up and hurl at the ground

crush and pulverize between my rear end cheeks

strangle

strangle

also lmfao at everything

Lol the D&D guy pulling his dick out of your rear end and it’s compressed to 2mm thick and 3x as long and gross and floppy. Nasty.

Good soup!
Nov 2, 2010

lmfao

Gatto Grigio
Feb 9, 2020

If you can beat up an 8-year old, you can kill a goblin.

(i cannot)

Bongo Bill
Jan 17, 2012

There isn't a single level 1 Dungeons & Dragons monster that I'm capable of killing. However, I think there are some that I could successfully run away from without dying ignominiously.

...but is it art?

ghosthorse
Dec 15, 2011

...you forget so easily...
I could bonk a kobold on the head so his tongue sticks out and his eyes bulge but only if theres a cool barbarian there I’m trying to impress


Fungah!
Apr 30, 2011

what the hell happened

Sub-Actuality
Apr 17, 2007

Fungah! posted:

what the hell happened

 




Knuc U Kinte
Aug 17, 2004

The iks need their asses kicked. The experiment is over. Major and chuck back NOW.

Wormskull
Aug 23, 2009

We need 6 mods and a very large hexagonal table with extra sturdy chairs. Ample seating surface and cushioning preferred.

Fungah!
Apr 30, 2011

Wormskull posted:

We need 6 mods and a very large hexagonal table with extra sturdy chairs. Ample seating surface and cushioning preferred.

Pablo Nergigante
Apr 16, 2002

Wormskull posted:

We need 6 mods and a very large hexagonal table with extra sturdy chairs. Ample seating surface and cushioning preferred.

Arrhythmia
Jul 22, 2011

Wormskull posted:

We need 6 mods and a very large hexagonal table with extra sturdy chairs. Ample seating surface and cushioning preferred.

Bicyclops
Aug 27, 2004

Knuc U Kinte posted:

The iks need their asses kicked. The experiment is over. Major and chuck back NOW.

what kind of dumb rear end would volunteer to be an ik for any length of time?

Hizke
Feb 14, 2010

Wormskull posted:

We need 6 mods and a very large hexagonal table with extra sturdy chairs. Ample seating surface and cushioning preferred.

lmfao

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insane anime
Aug 5, 2018

bunch of fat freaking pussies in the imp zone lol. Back in the day when i was lurking only Beef Cakes and Roided out CODtards posted. Guys who were in the gym constantly, and they only took breaks in between reps to laugh at noobs showing their whole asses. then they would slap each other with ttowels in the locker room and call eachother the F word . (not gently caress) Nowadays its like Moses was a soyboy who lead these noobs to the land of soylent and cummies, they love effort threads and apologizing for page snipes. They suck BBGs rear end and balls in the thread while saying they cant even beat up an 8 year old kid i mean what is the future of america going to look like with these weak manlets leading us

----------------
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Fungah!
Apr 30, 2011

insane anime posted:

bunch of fat freaking pussies in the imp zone lol. Back in the day when i was lurking only Beef Cakes and Roided out CODtards posted. Guys who were in the gym constantly, and they only took breaks in between reps to laugh at noobs showing their whole asses. then they would slap each other with ttowels in the locker room and call eachother the F word . (not gently caress) Nowadays its like Moses was a soyboy who lead these noobs to the land of soylent and cummies, they love effort threads and apologizing for page snipes. They suck BBGs rear end and balls in the thread while saying they cant even beat up an 8 year old kid i mean what is the future of america going to look like with these weak manlets leading us

lmao

That Little Demon
Dec 3, 2020

insane anime posted:

bunch of fat freaking pussies in the imp zone lol. Back in the day when i was lurking only Beef Cakes and Roided out CODtards posted. Guys who were in the gym constantly, and they only took breaks in between reps to laugh at noobs showing their whole asses. then they would slap each other with ttowels in the locker room and call eachother the F word . (not gently caress) Nowadays its like Moses was a soyboy who lead these noobs to the land of soylent and cummies, they love effort threads and apologizing for page snipes. They suck BBGs rear end and balls in the thread while saying they cant even beat up an 8 year old kid i mean what is the future of america going to look like with these weak manlets leading us

uh, I was smoking crack and playing COD nonstop and going to the gym 24/7 so :shrug:

trying to jack off
Dec 31, 2007

i got to the gym 25/7 and alaso ahve a rest day in between for maximum growth

Hizke
Feb 14, 2010

insane anime posted:

bunch of fat freaking pussies in the imp zone lol. Back in the day when i was lurking only Beef Cakes and Roided out CODtards posted. Guys who were in the gym constantly, and they only took breaks in between reps to laugh at noobs showing their whole asses. then they would slap each other with ttowels in the locker room and call eachother the F word . (not gently caress) Nowadays its like Moses was a soyboy who lead these noobs to the land of soylent and cummies, they love effort threads and apologizing for page snipes. They suck BBGs rear end and balls in the thread while saying they cant even beat up an 8 year old kid i mean what is the future of america going to look like with these weak manlets leading us

lol

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ol yeller
Feb 20, 2015

insane anime posted:

bunch of fat freaking pussies in the imp zone lol. Back in the day when i was lurking only Beef Cakes and Roided out CODtards posted. Guys who were in the gym constantly, and they only took breaks in between reps to laugh at noobs showing their whole asses. then they would slap each other with ttowels in the locker room and call eachother the F word . (not gently caress) Nowadays its like Moses was a soyboy who lead these noobs to the land of soylent and cummies, they love effort threads and apologizing for page snipes. They suck BBGs rear end and balls in the thread while saying they cant even beat up an 8 year old kid i mean what is the future of america going to look like with these weak manlets leading us

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

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