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*Live deer wedged in the grill finally rips itself free in my garage, flinging blood, fur, and bits of intestine over thousands of dollars worth of unused gym equipment*
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Feb 18, 2024 02:37
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| # ? Apr 27, 2024 22:07 |
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Wishes unending torment on LBJ for the Chicken Tax, forever forbidding US drivers from buying actual compact trucks.
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Feb 18, 2024 02:39
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Time for some gas
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Feb 18, 2024 02:52
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I’m literally pissing out of my rear end right now except its one of those geyser shits that spreads all over the bowl
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Feb 18, 2024 02:53
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I get out of my Truck and I see you in the grocery store parking lot. You're giving me a look I don't like. I ask what you're looking at while calling you a slur. You walk away shaking your head. Heh, that's right, you better run! I pull up my pants but my rear end and gut are still hanging way out. Ah poo poo I forgot my chew and pistol. I waddle back to my 20foot tall lifted truck. It's parked diagonally over 4 parking spaces, one of them is a handicap space. Ah out of chew! I grab some of the 3 week old chew out of the bottle in the cupholder and just toss that into my mouth instead. Still fresh! I put my 45 magnum into it's concealed holder accidentally firing it. I'm bleeding, it's bad... the world gets foggy as I fall 20 feet to the asphalt on my back. The last thing I see is the smug look of that guy I called a slur. I die.
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Feb 18, 2024 02:54
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having to wear a seatbelt or use turn signals is unamerican liberal bullshit
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Feb 18, 2024 03:00
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gas grass or rear end nobody rides for free
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Feb 18, 2024 03:05
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I climb the six feet of ladder to reach my driver's door, using all of my strength and both hands to yank on the gigantic diamond plate handle. I scamper inside and plop down on leather throne that an entire herd of cattle died for. I sit down hard on my nuts and immediately blame it on Joe Biden.
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Feb 18, 2024 03:08
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Fairly sure the guy down the street with the ford transit is loving my wife.
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Feb 18, 2024 03:11
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*accelerates towards every red light, brakes hard at the last second, then peels out when the light turns green to get stopped by another red light 100 yards down the road. every time.*
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Feb 18, 2024 03:14
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Mr Teatime posted:Fairly sure the guy down the street with the ford transit is loving my wife. A man, a van, a plan: Adultery.
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Feb 18, 2024 03:15
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oxgpKjuFczo
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Feb 18, 2024 03:20
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I'm like 5'4
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Feb 18, 2024 04:05
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Dr. Gojo Shioji posted:Wishes unending torment on LBJ for the Chicken Tax, forever forbidding US drivers from buying actual compact trucks.  Not that large trucks don't have their place, but kei trucks are good enough for most truckin' in Japan: 
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Feb 18, 2024 04:05
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Monthly payments are $1200 and I'm deeply in debt.
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Feb 18, 2024 04:06
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 heard someone called for oversized trucks, i'm OMW
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Feb 18, 2024 04:07
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Someone was talking to me for about 20 minutes about buying a tunnel cover for their truck they just bought and describing the different systems, options and price points that are available and in budget. And I'm just like what the gently caress, how lovely are trucks that they need to buy some kind of thousand(s) dollar accessory just to drive through tunnels.
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Feb 18, 2024 04:16
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Vroom vroooooooooooom
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Feb 18, 2024 04:44
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Puts on a tough farmhand act, refuses to drink anything but American beer and Diet Coke, sneers at anyone driving an electric, hybrid, or small and efficient vehicle Lives in a comfy middle-class suburb, interior and exterior of truck are spotless, trailer hitch completely unused, truck bed pristine, largest item ever carried was 36 super mega roll pack of toilet paper 56-year-old woman in an F150 old enough to vote pulls me out of a ditch, I thank her while grumbling about the paint scratch caused by one of the chains
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Feb 18, 2024 04:55
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*Drives to Burger King 10 miles from house* "Oh my god gas is so expensive, loving Joe Brandon"
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Feb 18, 2024 04:59
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Lifted truck, lifted shoes, lifted life
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Feb 18, 2024 05:01
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Man all this extra room in the cab is gonna be so useful once I find that magic bean sales person, and get myself one of those giantess wives!
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Feb 18, 2024 05:04
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'Yeah bro can't wait to hit Mammoth this weekend!' *truck too wide for trail, brushes scrape pinstripes into paint* 'its fine i bought a truck to use it!' *truck gets high centered on a rock' 'gently caress I shoulda got the locker' *Subaru Forester blasts past at freeway speed, banging DMB, leaving a giant plume of weed smoke*
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Feb 18, 2024 05:08
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Truck lifted. Toes down. Keep on the path.
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Feb 18, 2024 05:10
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-Crashes- -Never learned to drive-
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Feb 18, 2024 05:12
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Is this too many Trump stickers, does this make me look stupid? NAH, this looks cool as hell, especially how they don't line up or anything.
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Feb 18, 2024 05:13
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*for some reason constantly tries to race owners of faster cars such as forums poster devils affricate and loses every time*
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Feb 18, 2024 05:14
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Feb 18, 2024 06:00
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I constantly complain how the "other guy" made gas more expensive, but my friends and I purchase the vehicle that uses more gas than a small middle eastern country can produce
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Feb 18, 2024 06:20
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I drive an oversized truck.
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Feb 18, 2024 08:13
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flubber nuts posted:I drive an oversized truck. Prove it.
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Feb 18, 2024 08:16
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Are your truck nuts low? Do they wobble to and fro? Do they tie up in a knot when you hit a big pothole?
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Feb 18, 2024 08:24
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Hilux? No fucks.
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Feb 18, 2024 08:28
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neighbor across the street has 3 huge trucks. they appear to be... propagating.
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Feb 18, 2024 08:47
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loving libtards trying to make us all use e-lec-tric cars [spits, looks at gas meter.] fuckin' biden, can't believe these gas prices.
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Feb 18, 2024 08:49
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DeeplyConcerned posted:neighbor across the street has 3 huge trucks. they appear to be... propagating. If you look back in an hour and there's five or move, run. don't look back, don't grab anything, just get the gently caress out of dodge. Huge trucks can take over a city way to quickly in breeding seasons. 
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Feb 18, 2024 08:52
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Got back from deployment and there was literally nothing else I could picture spending $90k on
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Feb 18, 2024 09:27
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Worf posted:Got back from deployment and there was literally nothing else I could picture spending $90k on
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Feb 18, 2024 09:32
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All of the stuff listed in the thread is hilarious poo poo I see daily. Doesn’t even phase me anymore. The reverse parking in the OP? That is the one thing that makes me irrationally angry.
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Feb 18, 2024 09:44
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| # ? Apr 27, 2024 22:07 |
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Dumb Sex-Parrot posted:yeah i know it takes up 1.5 spaces at the parking lot, but imagine the day there's a flood or a blizzard my oversized truck will come in handy. This is starting to happen every six months tho drat, maybe I should buy an oversized truck.
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Feb 18, 2024 10:04
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