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*flips your rifle scope cover for you* Can I pull the trigger this time?
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Mar 23, 2024 01:14
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Nothing personal, kid.
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Mar 23, 2024 01:23
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I didn't do it.
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Mar 23, 2024 01:23
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Point towards enemy???
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Mar 23, 2024 01:23
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umm did you say Polonium or Bolognium?
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Mar 23, 2024 01:24
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redshirt posted:Point towards enemy??? I think that's how it goes. God the training program has just gone to poo poo these days eh?
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Mar 23, 2024 01:25
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You know what Natalie Portman? You need to go home. This is weird and inappropriate.
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Mar 23, 2024 01:26
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Gets wasted in the fancy international hotel bar
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Mar 23, 2024 01:27
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Hey uh, just checking, but I'm not like, one of those guys John Wick is gonna kill instantly, no problem, right?
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Mar 23, 2024 01:28
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Why are we killing people anyway? What did they actually do wrong? This sucks.
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Mar 23, 2024 01:29
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You should try this, it's to die for. uh not literally, you know, haha, i mean, uh, its like, a saying. it won't kill you. or will it? haha just kidding it wont
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Mar 23, 2024 01:33
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didi u know that the word "assassin" comes from the arabic word "assin' " which is slang for loving or being hosed in the rear end, or eating rear end, or fingering rear end; and this is because the earliest "assassins" financed their mall ninja cosplay by producing extremely amateur porn?
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Mar 23, 2024 01:38
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Buce posted:didi u know that the word "assassin" comes from the arabic word "assin' " which is slang for loving or being hosed in the rear end, or eating rear end, or fingering rear end; and this is because the earliest "assassins" financed their mall ninja cosplay by producing extremely amateur porn? buddy why you think I'm in this business
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Mar 23, 2024 01:42
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(Trying to make a good impression on day one of the stakeout, crawling into the shrubbery outside the target’s house) WHO WANTS COFFEE?!?! *Strong glares from Senior Vice Assassin* (Much quieter and less enthusiasm) Who wants coffee? I brought creamer.
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Mar 23, 2024 01:43
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Actual killing is left to more experienced colleagues. As an intern, you’ll just be mildly inconveniencing the target. Your first mission is to hide their car keys in-between the cushions on their couch.
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Mar 23, 2024 02:12
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What do you mean I get paid in bitcoin? How the gently caress do I pay my rent with that?
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Mar 23, 2024 02:14
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I'll be paid in exposure so when I go pro I'll already have clientele lined up? Neat!
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Mar 23, 2024 02:15
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So anyways, yeah, my boss is this "big time" assassin. He thinks. It seems pretty small time stuff to me.
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Mar 23, 2024 02:20
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new enough to the game you still giggle that your job title has "rear end" twice in a row
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Mar 23, 2024 02:34
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I watched Grosse Pointe Blank like 15 times. I’m ready.
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Mar 23, 2024 02:38
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*jumps from a 200ft tall tower into a pile of hay* *dies violently upon impact*
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Mar 23, 2024 02:46
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Actually I'm just assin until the promotion
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Mar 23, 2024 03:25
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no, i mean, i don't have a problem with the whole car bomb thing i just think it's a little hosed up, is all
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Mar 23, 2024 03:37
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*leans on wall outside of class, ashes cig, flips stiletto* Yeah I don’t need to study.
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Mar 23, 2024 03:39
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So yeah these instructions for this bomb seems to end with me.... you know, no offense sir, kinda blowing up. What's up with that?
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Mar 23, 2024 03:39
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So do I need to call HR about a voucher for fiber wire or do buy it and bring them the receipt and they credit my next paycheck? My previous syndicate didn't let me keep any equipment when I was laid off so if you could get back to me ASAP I'd appreciate it as I really can't afford to fall behind on this months rent. Also, I accidentally dosed myself with the emetic pen so I'm not going to be able to kill that oil baron on Monday. Do I have to use my PTO or is this considered a sick day?
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Mar 23, 2024 03:51
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So, uh, maybe this is a bad time to bring this up but... when I applied, I was told that this would be a paid position, but the mission debrief said that I would be paid in "exposure"? Look, I got student loans, and the kinds of institutions that you study this stuff at aren't exactly ones you want to go into collections with.
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Mar 23, 2024 04:16
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I'm just spitballin' here, but ... we could make the pit vipers say more aggressive if we gave them some stimulants.
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Mar 23, 2024 04:18
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Toby, you're just about the best intern we've ever had here. Yes vell there's a very good reason for that Doctor Schroder. Mein Gott! *pink pink* *pink pink* Pink is the sound a silenced pistol makes.
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Mar 23, 2024 04:20
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"you have to download adobe acrobat. no. not like that!~"
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Mar 23, 2024 04:26
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*shrugs* beats being a ninja intern
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Mar 23, 2024 04:29
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You sure this guy gotta get got? He just bought that air fryer, why don't we watch and see what he makes with it first?
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Mar 23, 2024 04:53
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Szyznyk posted:I watched Grosse Pointe Blank like 15 times. I’m ready. I watched "The Whole 9 Yards" at least that many times. Amanda Peet makes me want to polish my gun.
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Mar 23, 2024 05:05
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covidstomper58 posted:You sure this guy gotta get got? He's gonna cook a neurotoxin you shan't hesitate! We didn't pay you almost enough for your next gadget unlock for nothing!
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Mar 23, 2024 05:48
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redshirt posted:So yeah these instructions for this bomb seems to end with me.... you know, no offense sir, kinda blowing up. What's up with that? Just do your loving job, Redshirt!
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Mar 23, 2024 05:53
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Mumpy Puffinz posted:Just do your loving job, Redshirt! *adjusts tie Sure thing boss
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Mar 23, 2024 05:54
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*Pays for the meal with the boss's CC
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Mar 23, 2024 07:03
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Wait, assassin interns?! I thought this was rear end-to-rear end interns!
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Mar 23, 2024 07:16
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Knife goes in, guts come out, knife goes in, guts come out
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Mar 23, 2024 07:19
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| # ? May 6, 2024 00:47 |
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a dmc delorean posted:Knife goes in, guts come out, knife goes in, guts come out lol
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Mar 23, 2024 07:28
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