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 "In the imperium, we do not believe in heaven nor hell, not gods or devils, not magic nor superstition!" "I see. So you risk your lives, knowing death is the final end?""No! We do not believe in hell! However, you DO have a soul that carries on after you die.""Oh... okay. What happens to it?""After death, it travels to another dimension! A really scary one! There your soul suffers for eternity!""So hell?""None of your superstitious nonsense, heretic! This is no hell. It is the warp, a dimension ruled by chaotic gods.""I thought there weren't any gods?""There aren't! And there are four of them. No demons either! But there are daemons.""I'm so confused.""If you knew the Emperor's will, you would be illuminated and no longer lost in ignorance.""This Emperor, is he powerful?""Beyond compare! He is the one who led us away from superstition, religious dogma, and silly beliefs in fairy tales.""Wow. Where is he now?""He's dead!""Oh. Bummer.""Yes, dead and 40,000+ years old. And still large and in charge.""Huh?""His brain lives! Kind of!""But he was alive for tens of thousands of years? How is that possible? With science?""No! He is a powerful psychic. His power is beyond compare. He can see the future, control time and space itself, and shoot fireballs and lightning probably.""But I thought you said magic didn't...""Speak not of magic! Such barbaric concepts Our emperor was born of a moment when ancient mystical shaman sacrificed themselves, their souls joining together into a Super Soul, and thus the Emperor came into being." "It sure sounds like-""It's not magic! It's all very scientific. You just don't understand.""Well, I suppose you guys do have some impressive scientific abilities. So it can't be all... um... not-magic. How does it work?""No clue!""Oh. Ok.""All thanks to the Machine Spirit and the Omnissiah it works!""But I thought you said-""No gods! Only men. The Emperor is just a man. A powerful one, but a man no less. And he's the Machine God. Maybe. But not a god. But you must worship him. As a god.""Just a man. A man who is thousands of years old and is immortal and psychic and is dead but not dead and also has fireballs?""Yes. Now you understand.""...""Did I tell you about the time that the Emperor, in medieval Terra, defeated a literal dragon who was eating all the princesses? Took that dragon straight to Mars and locked it away, he did!""WTF"
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Mar 25, 2024 20:11
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Look, these 100 books about the Horus Heresy ain't gonna read themselves.
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Mar 25, 2024 20:31
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I cant afford to play 40k and don't have any friends. This is my only way to get in with the cool kids at the hobby store. Please.
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Mar 25, 2024 20:49
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TrashMammal posted:bet you haven’t even tried to strike up a conversation about ethics in gaming journalism That's why I don't have any friends to begin with.
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Mar 25, 2024 20:54
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These people REALLY like skulls.
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Mar 25, 2024 22:15
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Bad Purchase posted:you can knock fascism all you want but i don’t see any human worlds where democracy or socialism are keeping the ruinous powers in check
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Mar 25, 2024 22:35
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If orks reproduce via spores, do they have dicks?
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Mar 25, 2024 23:26
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sugar free jazz posted:I’m teh horney type of space demon Papa Nurgle?
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Mar 25, 2024 23:55
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What's up with Tau? GW make a faction and then just flat-out forget about it?
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Mar 26, 2024 02:20
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Nuebot posted:I like the part where half of the bad poo poo that went down in the empire could have been avoided if the Emperor just wasn't a piece of poo poo and actually talked to his large clone sons or maybe even hugged them. "Hey guys, I'm gonna go work on a cool teleportation device back on Earth. Don't tell no one. I loooooovvvveee yoooouuuu." Heresy averted.
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Mar 26, 2024 13:48
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Racism aside, gotta love how 40,000 years in the future they're still using variations of names from our era, just spelled dumb. Yndonesia Merica Sammuel Ejipt Randy
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Mar 26, 2024 15:54
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Garviel recalled the ancient hieroglyphics of Blahndii and her gluttonous husband, Daggwoud. These teachings, alongside the deeds of The Horrible Haggar and Chyalrlee Bron, gave insight into the terrors within the hearts of men.
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Mar 26, 2024 15:59
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Benagain posted:The primarch of the world eaters, the angriest chaos space Marines, is named Angron because the bouncer at a pub the founders went to was called Angry Ron I really hope this is true.
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Mar 26, 2024 17:56
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So it's the year 40,000.999. 41k when?
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Mar 26, 2024 20:14
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Yes
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Mar 27, 2024 00:20
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Ghost Leviathan posted:Thing is though the Emperor is literally a corpse on a throne venerated by an empire he has no actual control over which does literally everything wrong either from ignoring what he tried to teach them or following it to the letter, with the implication he is aware of it all and can barely influence anything at all with the most Herculean effort The Emperor is an rear end in a top hat even before the heresy who commits genocide against alien races and forces all humans to bend to his will, because he has decided that humanity needs an entire galaxy to turn into habworld shitholes.
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Mar 27, 2024 14:28
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Asterite34 posted:tbf have you seen the aliens humanity shares a galaxy with? Those guys are loving psychos. I'm not gonna shed a tear over the genocide of the world-devouring Xenomorphs or the S&M Juggalo Elves or the Skeleton Robots or murderous soccer hooligan Orcs or whatever In one of the early Heresy novels they encounter a lost human civilization that is like, "even nasty monster-bugs have a right to life. We just took away their means of space travel and confined them to a single planet. And we put a bunch of warnings around so that people didn't bother them." The Astartes then fully murder that civilization and the monster planet, too.
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Mar 27, 2024 15:53
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When I was reading that book, I just kept thinking, "aren't these tyranids"? But no, I guess not. Giant slicey bug monster gets used a lot on 40k (and other media too). I didn't mind the Fulgrim book. They did some neat stuff with Slaanesh, although supposedly-badass Ferus Manus gets clowned twice in a row like a dork. And for those of us who DIDN'T have prior knowledge of the DS massacre... Eclipse12 fucked around with this message at 19:38 on Mar 27, 2024 |
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Mar 27, 2024 16:49
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sharknado slashfic posted:Wow spoilers Not sure if you were being sincere or not, but I added tags either way. My bad. Hope I didn't ruin anything.
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Mar 27, 2024 19:39
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sharknado slashfic posted:Lol I was just joking I've read an embarrassing amount of 40k books. It's not a bad idea though there's always new people getting into it unfortunately for them. Okay, cool. I don't wanna be that rear end in a top hat. Dumb Sex-Parrot posted:regarding Emp's plan to conquer the entire galaxy, wasn't part of it the intent to starve out the chaos gods by controlling all psychic races? I have no evidence, but this feels revisionist. And it doesn't explain all the other slaughter. I'm actually reading the Magnus book right now and part of their mentality is that psychic presence WILL happen so it's better to intentionally bolster it in humanity so it can be used safely. Of course, that's just Magnus' view. Spoiler related question re: Garviel Lokken Just a "yes" or "no", but do we ever see him again after Istvan? The last book I read he was on planet but had survived(?) the virus, fire, and traitor legions. Eclipse12 fucked around with this message at 20:40 on Mar 27, 2024 |
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Mar 27, 2024 20:38
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Mar 27, 2024 20:41
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Hollismason posted:The Gaunts Ghost books are pretty good. My wife likes this series. It's certainly a different vibe, being with the expendable and vulnerable Guard compared to the IMMORTAL BADASS ASTARTES.
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Mar 28, 2024 00:20
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When I was first learning to play 40k I remember a group of my ork boyz getting into melee with a dreadnought or something. Can I run away? No, not by choice. Can I hurt it? No, my weapons literally could not. Can I shoot it with my nearby unit with rokkits? No, you can't shoot into melee that has your own models (bullshit, orks would absolutely do that) So I just had to sit there pointlessly while it clobbered me. My first and forever tabletop love is Battletech, and that's partly because the rules allow for even a one-armed Stinger to kill an unhurt Dire Wolf if they get extremely lucky. It's never totally hopeless.
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Mar 28, 2024 14:41
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Also, titty_baby_ mentioned Warmachine and that's a game I wish had a bigger presence. Such a fun and flavorful game. I wish there were more (any) true-to-life digital tabletop games so I could actually play them. I have a healthy game store a mile from my house, but time, money, and annoying dorks of in-person gaming make it very unappealing.
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Mar 28, 2024 14:47
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Macdeo Lurjtux posted:Yeah, Warmachine launched a new edition, squatted a bunch of factions, and then went full resin 3d printer for their production line. This led to sending uncured(like literally one of the first people to buy a box at Genxon reported that he had chemical burns all over his hands after putting them together that noght) and low quality resin minis to their most loyal fans and ended up killing the game faster than Fantasy Flight killed Xwing. That's a shame. They had a really cool product.
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Mar 28, 2024 16:43
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It would just help if Chaos wasn't all about murder. Tzeentch is maybe the least murdery, but they also don't seem to show up a lot. Even Slaanesh, who is supposedly all about indulgence, always ends up having that indulgence culminate in death. I want beautiful art... that makes people kill! I want beautiful music... that makes people kill! I want delicious food, etc etc Not EVERYTHING is a blood orgy guys. Yeesh.
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Mar 28, 2024 20:56
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How can we make your opponent more insufferable to play against???
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Mar 28, 2024 22:50
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Exactly how tall are the biggest Titans? I knew they vary in size but it seems like the average one is only around 100 feet tall, which seems kinda meh. They be hiding inside buildings and stuff. But then you look at any art of them and their absolutely enormous, bigger than a mountain with an entire university as a hat. And the books usually refer to a very small crew, just a handful, but it seems you'd have dozens working it. What gives, GW?
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Mar 29, 2024 13:31
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Hmm. Can orks be corrupted by Chaos? I've never heard of Chaos Orks. Just one more reason orks is best.
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Mar 30, 2024 01:48
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Just read about penitent engines and... yikes.
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Mar 30, 2024 17:28
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Waste not, want not!
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Mar 30, 2024 18:05
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I think I want that book.
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Apr 1, 2024 01:19
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| # ¿ May 15, 2024 00:22 |
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I want Tau to be cool because I love mechs. Is that not their thing?
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Apr 2, 2024 20:55
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