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What should I yell at the Judge?
“I’m a lawyer. What we think isn’t supposed to matter.”
"Permission to approach."
"You can't handle the truth"
“In the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate yet equally important groups: the police, who investigate crime; and the district attorneys, who prosecute the offenders. These are their stories.”
"No further questions your honor"
"May I beg the court’s indulgence for a moment?"
"The evidence is overwhelming."
"If the glove fits, you must acquit"
" I'm holding you in contempt of court."
"Goku"
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Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005

Don't forget Hitler's contributions to medicine.
I had jury duty a few months ago, I had to spend multiple days staring at a man while I heard detailed explanations of how he sadistically sexually tortured and raped multiple women and then send him off to spend the rest of his life in a mental institution. Death would be preferable to what he put these people through.

Even though I am not longer under a gag order, I haven't even told my own husband any details about the trial because he does not deserve to be burdened with the knowledge of what a human being is capable of doing to another people like I am.

Also they paid me like $70 and I get paid jury duty at work so I there was that.

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Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005

Don't forget Hitler's contributions to medicine.

Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:

The money u get for missing work on jury duty unless ur job pays u for the time off is one of those things they haven't changed in decades because they decided letting it rot at some pathetic amount that hasn't been relevant for ages is easier than just getting rid of it. Kind of like EBT, disability and welfare but those are way more depressing and evil when it comes to how they've intentionally neglected them lol

I get two weeks Jury duty that doesn't count against my 34 days a year of PTO, so with the extra $86 dollars I made listening to hours of how multiple people were sadistically raped for hours at gunpoint I basically go paid extra to go home early every day to cry while drinking heavily and I have a legal reason why I couldn't tell my husband what was wrong.

Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005

Don't forget Hitler's contributions to medicine.

syntaxfunction posted:

You know goons are at a good age when most are looking forward to jury duty as a way to just do something different lol

It was immediately obvious why we were selected when we first started getting to know each other. It was a couple of retired conservatives, a few of us liberal professionals trying to get work done during recesses and then like 4 people that I honestly did not believe existed before the trial, they were like, air. I figured they would have opinions when we began deliberations and they were just like, undecided voters literally exist and they are in the room with me.

It was almost creepy, like 4 of you in this room don't know and don't care what ice is.

Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005

Don't forget Hitler's contributions to medicine.

wheatpuppy posted:

Depends. When I was chosen for grand jury, the judge literally said he would not remove anyone who said that, so don't even try. The only people he excused were a woman whose husband was undergoing cancer treatment, and she needed to drive him to the hospital three times a week, and a man who was moving out of the county within six months. Otherwise, if you answered "yes" to "do you live in X county" and "no" to "do you have a life-or-death reason not to be here on Wednesdays" you were in.

I forgot the exact question we were asked but it was basically anyone that would have mental trouble with hearing about graphic descriptions of sexual violence is free to go. I was like, sure, hearing about someone being raped would be disturbing but its not going to keep me up at night. I mean, I'm a consumer of news media, awful rapes are reported on all the time, it's disturbing but like not nightmare inducing.


The things this guy did to these women were just unimaginable, I remember thinking I would be begging him to go ahead and kill me already.

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