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Tired Moritz TOWN-aligned Chili and Anger has been executed D1. It is my firm belief that man can subsist on nothing more then chili and anger. To that end, I have decided to share my own favorite chili recipe with the lot of you, so that you may convert your shame and anger into chili and anger. In this way, I am the best humanitarian who has ever or will ever survive. I'm going to be breaking a few sacred chili rules here. Too bad; I apologize to no one. Ingredients: 1 & 1/2 to 2 lbs of ground PORK (perfect way to uncover jews) 2 packages of french onion soup mix (be prepared for your chili to surrender) 2 tablespoons of chili powder (less if you're a baby, more if you're a man) 4 teaspoons of ground cumin (omit this and I will devour your soul) 1 teaspoon of black pepper (slightly racist) 1/2 teaspoon of salt (or none if you're heaving a heart attack right now) 6 ejaculations (squirts) of Tabasco sauce 1 21-ounce can of red beans and 1 21-ounce can of black beans (I have a dream) 2 6-ounce cans of tomato paste with garlic (regular tomato paste = you're an rear end in a top hat) 2 8-ounce cans of tomato sauce (real men need more than just paste) 1 yellow, orange or red pepper, chopped up (green peppers are Satan's taint) 1 package of sliced mushrooms (yes, you can slice your own mushrooms, smartass) Instructions: Put the meat in a huge chili pot and brown it over medium heat Add 4 cups of water and the french onion soup mix. Stir and let simmer for 10 minutes Stir in the spices and the Tabasco and simmer for another minute or two Add the beans, the mushrooms and the chopped pepper Turn to low and let simmer for at least 20 minutes, 40 is better, stirring every 5-10 Call your mother and tell her she's not allowed to hug you anymore And that's it, you're done. You just went from a pathetic, flaccid pushover to a chili-chewing boner-owner in about an hour. Your life will thank me. Who's next? Don't even think about posting a recipe with corn in it. You should be ashamed of yourself. Tired Moritz's Chili and Anger is worth 30 points.
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Apr 23, 2024 03:17
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Cloacamazing!'s Chili and Anger In honor of TMor's haute cuisine. So we had leftover chili from the Mexico Döner. I had some for lunch yesterday and I'm going to reheat some for lunch today.  Now in the meantime, may I direct your attention to this sparkly clean pan that just last morning was very much not cleaned from having been used to make chili with?  Now the kitchen door was closed when the chili remains mysteriously disappeared, alongside of a portion of dog food, a carton of milk and several carrots. Evidence A: There are bite marks shaped like my dog's teeth in the carrots. Evidence B: There are also bite marks of the same shape in the milk carton. Evidence C: My dog had some strangely liquid shits yesterday, which clearly contained corn.  Conclusion: Alfie has learned how to open doors. I caught him later that evening trying to get into the kitchen again. We have rotated the kitchen door handle 90 degrees and not given him any dinner because he already ate his.
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Apr 23, 2024 06:53
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I don't know freedom units off the top of my head, but that recipe seems like it makes a huge batch
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Apr 23, 2024 08:05
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Illusionis posted:I don't know freedom units off the top of my head, but that recipe seems like it makes a huge batch Yeah there's 2.2 lbs in 1 kg so that's a good amount of pork
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Apr 23, 2024 09:23
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It needs a lot of pork because this is a very manly recipe. Sadly, I am a woman, Alfie is castrated and my husband bought the new purple and pink sports shirt of the German soccer team, so we're all too female and weak to handle this chili, which is why we're putting corn in. We are also not manly enough for French onion soup mix in chili, I suppose. Which, fair enough.
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Apr 23, 2024 11:25
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Yeah I think I'm gonna halve that recipe
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Apr 23, 2024 12:02
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Cloacamazing! posted:
If you have a doorway to your kitchen you can babygate it so you aren't forced to answer a riddle or dribble a basketball (things dogs can't do) to access your kitchen.
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Apr 23, 2024 12:06
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I might just make Cincinnati chili and call it a day
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Apr 23, 2024 12:23
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saladscooper posted:I might just make Cincinnati chili and call it a day Prevoting salad for tomorrow
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Apr 23, 2024 15:00
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Maerlyn posted:If you have a doorway to your kitchen you can babygate it so you aren't forced to answer a riddle or dribble a basketball (things dogs can't do) to access your kitchen. Babygate sounds like it's worth a try, thanks!
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Apr 23, 2024 15:10
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Opopanax posted:Prevoting salad for tomorrow omgus
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Apr 23, 2024 15:10
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Maerlyn posted:If you have a doorway to your kitchen you can babygate it so you aren't forced to answer a riddle or dribble a basketball (things dogs can't do) to access your kitchen. Someone hasn't seen critically acclaimed masterpiece Air Bud
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Apr 23, 2024 15:15
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Cloacamazing! posted:Babygate sounds like it's worth a try, thanks! what the hell did this baby do
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Apr 23, 2024 15:24
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Cloacamazing! posted:Babygate sounds like it's worth a try, thanks! Speaking from experience it's great, splurging for the walk through door is worth it if that's available in Germany but there's also just cheap wooden ones. We have one for the bathroom too because our dog ate the cats food and medicine (pill packs with foil and all, wtf dog). They induced vomiting but he was okay. Grandicap posted:Someone hasn't seen critically acclaimed masterpiece Air Bud I haven't! Alfie also sounds like the type to overcome any potential obstacle...Clo might have the next Air Bud on her hands
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Apr 23, 2024 15:38
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saladscooper posted:what the hell did this baby do Chaos and destruction.
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Apr 23, 2024 16:49
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Grandicap posted:Someone hasn't seen critically acclaimed masterpiece Air Bud No one said a dog can’t be a sous chef
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Apr 23, 2024 16:50
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He's eating all the ingredients raw, Sand!
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Apr 23, 2024 16:52
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Cloacamazing! posted:He's eating all the ingredients raw, Sand! Sorry he’s BUILT DIFFERENT
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Apr 23, 2024 16:59
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Cloacamazing! posted:He's eating all the ingredients raw, Sand! Chili sushi style
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Apr 23, 2024 17:24
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Brat Pasta The recipe calls for uncooked brats but I accidentally bought fully cooked so I got to skip one step. Cut into bites and brown them up a bit:  Add cream cheese and diced tomatoes, stir until cream cheese melted (it looks pretty gross at this stage not gonna lie):   Meanwhile cook your pasta (I didn't realize it was going to be the full bag so the pot was a little crowded):  Add chicken broth and ALL THE SPICES:  Also add pasta, stir it up:  This is far too beige for my taste, so I add a bit of spinach to my bowl. Next time we'll add sauteed onions and peppers too, it needs some veggies:  The amiibos are watching (my husband has been playing Tears of the Kingdom)
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Apr 24, 2024 00:17
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mild chili powder is a drat liar
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Apr 24, 2024 00:36
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Idle Amalgam's Special Guest Recipe Brown Sugar Glazed Carrots has been killed N1. Ingredients ▢1 kg / 2 lb carrots , peeled (Note 1) ▢1/4 cup (40g) brown sugar , loosely packed (Note 2) ▢2 garlic cloves , minced ▢2 tbsp butter (30g) , melted (or olive oil) ▢1 tbsp olive oil ▢½ tsp salt ▢¼ tsp black pepper ▢Parsley , for garnish (optional) Instructions Preheat oven to 220C/425F (standard) or 200C/400F (fan). Cut carrot on the diagonal into 4cm / 1.75” lengths. Halve thicker end so they are all roughly the same width. Toss in a bowl with sugar, butter, garlic, oil, salt and pepper. Pour onto tray, spread out. Roast 15 minutes. Toss, then roast a further 10 minutes until soft and caramelised on the edges with plenty of glaze left on the tray. Toss carrots in the glaze, sprinkle with parsley if using. Serve warm. Idle Amalgam's Special Guest Recipe Brown Sugar Glazed Carrots are worth 30 points. It is now Day 2.
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Apr 24, 2024 03:19
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Votecount for Day 2 Not Voting (15): CapitalistPig, Cloacamazing!, Hyper Crab Tank, Illusionis, Maerlyn, merk, Opopanax, Pussy Quipped, saladscooper, Sandwolf, Tea Party Crasher, Token Female, Voodoofly, WindwardAway, wins32767With 15 alive, it's 8 votes to execute. The current deadline is April 26th, 2024 at 10 p.m. EDT -- that's in about 2 days, 23 hours.
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Apr 24, 2024 03:21
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Hi everyone. I’ve been feeling under the weather today but I should be making some chili tomorrow!
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Apr 24, 2024 03:25
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Pussy Quipped posted:Hi everyone. I’ve been feeling under the weather today but I should be making some chili tomorrow! Chili is great food when you are sick!
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Apr 24, 2024 03:26
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So when are we going to try scum hunting?
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Apr 24, 2024 03:33
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wins32767 posted:So when are we going to try scum hunting? Care to demonstrate good sir
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Apr 24, 2024 03:40
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So what is a Chili? I think you can break it down to four main ingredients: base, protein, aromatics, and picante. There are also flourishes, such as fresh onion, fresh cilantro, cheese, etc, but at the end of the day the four bases are what makes it a chili! So, about that "break it down" idea? What if we really break it down and present . . . Voodoo's Deconstructed Chili and The players: Base: Superflux Colour and Shape IPA, as we all know beer is a good chili base Protein: ground beef that I hastily thawed in a pot with some dripping water, because above all else chili is pantry food where you use what you have! Aromatics: onion, tomato, cilantro, garlic, lime, and salt, brought together in an avocado spread Picante: Provided four ways: the garlic in the avocado spread, some curry powder for the beef (this is backup as a fusion dish if Grandi refuses to recognize this obvious chili dish), the red chile in the jack cheese, and every lazy person's secret ingredient, Valentina's! The process: Start with your ingredients:  Prepare the Avocado Spread:  Season and cook the beef:   Prepare the base:  Assemble your plating station:  Enjoy your Deconstructed Chili and Avocado Spread!!!  The best part is you can also transform your deconstructed chili and avocado as a wrap!!! Imagine that!!!   A versatile dish indeed, and one that has never been called anything but Deconstructed Chili and Avocado Spread. Points me up Grandi!
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Apr 24, 2024 04:46
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I was going to ask if sloppy joes can count but I guess that answers it
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Apr 24, 2024 04:56
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Opopanax posted:I was going to ask if sloppy joes can count but I guess that answers it It’s like you don’t even remember the time Hal teeth-julienned some carrots
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Apr 24, 2024 04:59
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I repress a lot of Cookfias
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Apr 24, 2024 05:10
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I am still trying to forget timpano for example
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Apr 24, 2024 05:12
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Sandwolf posted:I am still trying to forget timpano for example Someday I will tackle that mountain Someday
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Apr 24, 2024 05:22
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Cowards
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Apr 24, 2024 05:24
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Opopanax posted:Cowards Every time I see it at that local restaurant I’m tempted, but then I remember seeing yours.. my stomach will burst
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Apr 24, 2024 05:36
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Sandwolf posted:Every time I see it at that local restaurant I’m tempted, but then I remember seeing yours.. my stomach will burst You just cut it into pieces you don't eat the whole thing. I really need to watch Big Night sometime
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Apr 24, 2024 05:38
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Sandwolf posted:Every time I see it at that local restaurant I’m tempted, but then I remember seeing yours.. my stomach will burst they sell that for human consumption? To the public?
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Apr 24, 2024 05:41
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Opopanax posted:You just cut it into pieces you don't eat the whole thing. I really need to watch Big Night sometime yes, yes you do
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Apr 24, 2024 05:43
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wins32767 posted:So when are we going to try scum hunting? Well IA made three posts and didn't cook because his family was unsupportive of his plans, so I don't have much to hunt there. Also Grandi refuses to count my Chili and Anger dish.
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Apr 24, 2024 05:46
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Grandicap posted:Idle Amalgam's Special Guest Recipe Brown Sugar Glazed Carrots has been killed N1. Hold on hold on A sauce with sugar fat salt garlic and pepper covering a carrot?
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Apr 24, 2024 05:58
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