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The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > pick up lines
«‹›12 »
 
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redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

 If you ever need a muscled shoulder to lean/cry/other on....

* # ? Apr 27, 2024 05:02
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Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 11, 2024 15:59
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Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

R.L. Stine posted:

....................../´¯/)
....................,/¯../
.................../..../
............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸
........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\
........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
.........\.................'...../
..........''...\.......... _.·´
............\..............(
..............\.............\...

LOL

* # ? Apr 27, 2024 05:04
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Rocket Baby Dolls
Mar 3, 2006

Normally I don't make aesthetic criticisms in other peoples' homes, but that rug looks like a beaver exploded. If meat is murder, then that rug is at least a severe beating.
Hey baby, are you a parking ticket? 'Cause I want to pay you 50 bucks and then cry afterwards.

* # ? Apr 27, 2024 10:36
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Rocket Baby Dolls
Mar 3, 2006

Normally I don't make aesthetic criticisms in other peoples' homes, but that rug looks like a beaver exploded. If meat is murder, then that rug is at least a severe beating.
Polar bear! Now we're on the subject of predators...

* # ? Apr 27, 2024 10:40
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egg_dog
Nov 12, 2005

nͬ͒̂̓̂ͪoͨ́
Fun Shoe
Nice clothes, they would look better in the trash

* # ? Apr 27, 2024 12:12
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egg_dog
Nov 12, 2005

nͬ͒̂̓̂ͪoͨ́
Fun Shoe
Wanna see a grown man cry?

* # ? Apr 27, 2024 12:13
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Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die
Nap Ghost
pickituppickituppickitup...

oh sorry i've just been thinking about this ska song i heard recently

* # ? Apr 27, 2024 14:27
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wesleywillis
Dec 30, 2016

SUCK A MALE CAMEL'S DICK WITH MIRACLE WHIP!!

Mozi posted:

pickituppickituppickitup...

oh sorry i've just been thinking about this ska song i heard recently

If you find a bag of weed on the floor muthafucka what the gently caress you gon' do?
Pick it up pick it up.

* # ? Apr 27, 2024 15:36
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Harry_Potato
May 21, 2021
 Have you ever had a "Cleveland Steamroller"?

* # ? Apr 27, 2024 23:22
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redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

 I'm up to date on all my shots.

* # ? Apr 27, 2024 23:28
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egg_dog
Nov 12, 2005

nͬ͒̂̓̂ͪoͨ́
Fun Shoe
are you mwaaad at meeee?? [Higher pitched and louder] ARE YEOUUUU MWAAD AT MWWEEE???

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 01:23
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Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die
Nap Ghost
come with me if you want to live!


remember that movie? arnie, right? so great.

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 01:24
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Helpimscared
Jun 16, 2014

 I’ve used AI to generate pictures of what our children would look like and they are beautiful!

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 01:49
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wesleywillis
Dec 30, 2016

SUCK A MALE CAMEL'S DICK WITH MIRACLE WHIP!!
 Hey, why don't we just pretend that we're NOT cousins?

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 01:58
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Rubber Chicken
Mar 13, 2024
 Today is a good day to lie

With me.

In bed.

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 02:04
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redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

 I'll be unradioactive enough in like, 2 weeks.

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 03:25
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wesleywillis
Dec 30, 2016

SUCK A MALE CAMEL'S DICK WITH MIRACLE WHIP!!
 I just got my viagra prescription refilled

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 03:38
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Rubber Chicken
Mar 13, 2024
 Where you from, boy?

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 03:48
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Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

Rubber Chicken posted:

Where you from, boy?

Philadelphia. Where are you from, handsome?

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 04:58
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git apologist
Jun 4, 2003

 i am producing inordinate amounts of seminal fluid

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 08:50
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git apologist
Jun 4, 2003

 wait until you smell my apartment

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 08:50
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git apologist
Jun 4, 2003

 pissing alone, handsome?

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 08:51
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Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

git apologist posted:

pissing alone, handsome?

:wink:

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 08:54
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Pac and Cheese
Oct 29, 2010

gotta walk fast
are you an angel? cause i wanna gently caress you really bad

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 08:57
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Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

Pac and Cheese posted:

are you an angel? cause i wanna gently caress you really bad

:wink:

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 08:59
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Beefed Owl
Sep 13, 2007

Come at me scrub-lord I'm ripped!

wesleywillis posted:

Real talk, has anyone ever picked someone up, or been picked up with "hey, what's your sign"?

My sign is Elevator Capacity 3200 lbs or 16 persons

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 09:58
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Beefed Owl
Sep 13, 2007

Come at me scrub-lord I'm ripped!

Mozi posted:

come with me if you want to live!


remember that movie? arnie, right? so great.

Live with me if you want to cum!

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 09:59
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wesleywillis
Dec 30, 2016

SUCK A MALE CAMEL'S DICK WITH MIRACLE WHIP!!
 My herpes is no longer visible

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 18:26
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redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

 You are a human female, yes?

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 18:28
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The Earl of ToeJam
Jan 22, 2012
 *drop a lime on the ground*

Hey babe can you get that for me? I'm bad at pick up limes

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 18:51
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Rubber Chicken
Mar 13, 2024
 I'm mighty tighty whitey and I'm smugglin' plums

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 18:57
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wesleywillis
Dec 30, 2016

SUCK A MALE CAMEL'S DICK WITH MIRACLE WHIP!!
 I just took a giant poo poo and am ready for action.

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 19:22
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egg_dog
Nov 12, 2005

nͬ͒̂̓̂ͪoͨ́
Fun Shoe
My cum and precum are reversed. the cum is first, and there's not much, but when I finish there's loads of precum. it's like a flood, it's not piss though. Where are you going?

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 20:57
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Dang It Bhabhi!
May 27, 2004



ASK ME ABOUT
BEING
ESCULA GRIND'S
#1 SIMP
Shazzbot!

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 21:02
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Rubber Chicken
Mar 13, 2024
 I can't lick my elbow, but I'd like to lick yours

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 21:06
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egg_dog
Nov 12, 2005

nͬ͒̂̓̂ͪoͨ́
Fun Shoe
what's that smell?

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 21:07
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Rocket Baby Dolls
Mar 3, 2006

Normally I don't make aesthetic criticisms in other peoples' homes, but that rug looks like a beaver exploded. If meat is murder, then that rug is at least a severe beating.
Hey! How about you... If I said... You know if... What is your... I'm a... Never mind, I've just cum. Can I get you a drink?

Rocket Baby Dolls fucked around with this message at 21:21 on Apr 28, 2024

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 21:18
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Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

Rubber Chicken posted:

I can't lick my elbow, but I'd like to lick yours

That's pretty good. If you said that to me at a bar, I might let you do it

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 21:18
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Dang It Bhabhi!
May 27, 2004



ASK ME ABOUT
BEING
ESCULA GRIND'S
#1 SIMP
Thoughts on the Holocaust?

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 21:22
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Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 11, 2024 15:59
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Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

Dang It Bhabhi! posted:

Thoughts on the Holocaust?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cDGlN6mluGA

* # ? Apr 28, 2024 21:23
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The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > pick up lines
«‹›12 »