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geeves posted:I was mugged at gunpoint in front of my home a few days ago. Man that would be great fun at parties. Change Theon's to "loses his dick" though.
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Jun 15, 2012 00:59
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The Mutato posted:Man that would be great fun at parties.  Done.
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Jun 15, 2012 01:25
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Or install one of those things that lets you track/remotely brick the phone.
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Jun 15, 2012 01:44
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IRQ posted:Alright, you're going to have to give the thread your lunch money now. Not until I finish this poo poo! Okay folks, prepare for the biggest   this thread has seen in nearly a year:h is height of tower m is Bran's mass (39.46 kg) v is Bran's final velocity as he hit the ground g is acceleration due to gravity (9.8 m/s^2) F is force that will prevent Bran from his shameful boners (55 * 10^6 N) I want to solve for h. Kinetic energy = 1/2 * m * v^2 KE is also F*h so F * h = 1/2 * m * v^2 Now we need v and Bran's initial velocity for when he was witnessing incest was 0 m/s. v = sqrt[0^2 + 2 * g * h] So now, we have F * h = 1/2 * m * (2 * g *h) So... oh poo poo, this is impossible to do without the time it took for him to fall, goddammit. Okay, looks like I need to find the energy required to break the spine instead of the force required.
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Jun 15, 2012 01:48
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Blade_of_tyshalle posted:Paging Dr. Kylaer, please report to the Bad Thread. Dr. Kylaer to the Bad Thread. We require your medical expertise on the pressing subject of whether or not paraplegic ten-year-olds can have erections. No.  (I seem to recall a scene from Dance that describes Bran making GBS threads down Hodor's back, or at least the aftermath of same, so I don't think he has any control at that level. Also, Contra, your formula is incorrect, because the force required to cause a fracture in a vertebral body is not the same as the force of breaking a piece of idealized bone. Idealized bone. I think that's what Daaaaario~~ has, in Dany's mind)
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Jun 15, 2012 01:57
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If we ever have a bad thread goon meet I am going to swirly Contra so loving bad. 
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Jun 15, 2012 01:58
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Kylaer posted:(Contra, your formula is incorrect, because the force required to cause a fracture in a vertebral body is not the same as the force of breaking a piece of idealized bone. Idealized bone. I think that's what Daaaaario~~ has, in Dany's mind) Ah poo poo, oh well. It didn't end up working out anyway. RIP Bran's shameful boner. A GLISTENING HODOR posted:If we ever have a bad thread goon meet I am going to swirly Contra so loving bad. It is known Contra Calculus fucked around with this message at 02:03 on Jun 15, 2012 |
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Jun 15, 2012 02:00
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Bran shat down Hodor's back? I don't remember that scene, and I find it difficult to believe it exists because you aren't all going apeshit over it.
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Jun 15, 2012 02:01
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Ambiguatron posted:Bran shat down Hodor's back? I don't remember that scene, and I find it difficult to believe it exists because you aren't all going apeshit over it.
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Jun 15, 2012 02:02
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Given that any scenes of spontaneous making GBS threads are emblazoned on all our minds and constantly talked about and even become what the character that shits is known for... yeah, I'm betting that Bran never shat on anyone. The Starks may be stupid but at least they have bowel control.
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Jun 15, 2012 02:14
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Assuming the hypothetical next volume comes out, what's the over-under on our leaning in Bran's sight that Rhaegar and Lyanna did it under a heart tree? Bonus points if she shoved her tits right in the weirwood's face and Bran thinks she's Arya and gets confused and wants Meera to sit on his lap but doesn't know why because no one ever explained such to him.
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Jun 15, 2012 02:20
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Under King Rickon, the Stark words will be changed to "We Do Not Shart."
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Jun 15, 2012 02:25
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A GLISTENING HODOR posted:Under King Rickon, the Stark words will be changed to "We Do Not Shart." "Hello, Clarice".
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Jun 15, 2012 02:26
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Ambiguatron posted:"Hello, Clarice". What about the nuts, Clarice? Can you still hear them cracking?
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Jun 15, 2012 02:28
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Ambiguatron posted:"Hello, Clarice". A common phrase, but not their actual words. 
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Jun 15, 2012 02:29
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A maester of the citadel once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some lamprey pie and a nice Arbor red.
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Jun 15, 2012 02:31
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Contra Calculus posted:Not until I finish this poo poo! Okay folks, prepare for the biggest Depends on the angle he lands as well, and the surface area of impact.
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Jun 15, 2012 02:33
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Do any of you fine goons happen to know what chapter (or whereabouts) the infamous Dani and Daario sex scene is? I don't want to read the whole book again, but I'd like to print that scene out and pin it to the wall as a reminder to myself of how never to write a sex scene.
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Jun 15, 2012 03:05
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It'd be easier to just pin up a picture of GRRM in all his unholy glory. And then whenever you feel like writing a sex scene you can look at it and imagine him licking his glistening worm-like lips. Laughing his laugh. The way his deep-set eyes light up. The way the sweat dampens his brow. You'd never write another sex scene again, my friend, much less write a bad one.
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Jun 15, 2012 03:16
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shady anachronism posted:Do any of you fine goons happen to know what chapter (or whereabouts) the infamous Dani and Daario sex scene is? I don't want to read the whole book again, but I'd like to print that scene out and pin it to the wall as a reminder to myself of how never to write a sex scene. A quick google tells me Dany chapter 7 around page 564.
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Jun 15, 2012 03:31
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Dammit. A day or two ago the link to GRRMonparty worked, but now it's broken. Anybody have it?
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Jun 15, 2012 03:34
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shady anachronism posted:Do any of you fine goons happen to know what chapter (or whereabouts) the infamous Dani and Daario sex scene is? I don't want to read the whole book again, but I'd like to print that scene out and pin it to the wall as a reminder to myself of how never to write a sex scene. I am your queen and I demand a mereen steamer.
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Jun 15, 2012 03:47
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rejutka posted:A quick google tells me Dany chapter 7 around page 564. You are a beautiful person. Thank you! empty sea posted:It'd be easier to just pin up a picture of GRRM in all his unholy glory. And then whenever you feel like writing a sex scene you can look at it and imagine him licking his glistening worm-like lips. Laughing his laugh. The way his deep-set eyes light up. The way the sweat dampens his brow. Alas, I cannot do this, as I wouldn't want to jeopardize my ability to write smut. However, in keeping with the spirit of ADWD I'm inclined to put up a picture of GRRM in my bathroom, so he can preside over poo poo.
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Jun 15, 2012 04:12
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whowhatwhere posted:Dammit. A day or two ago the link to GRRMonparty worked, but now it's broken. Anybody have it? I haven't seen this, but... 
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Jun 15, 2012 04:17
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shady anachronism posted:You are a beautiful person. Thank you! You didn't post it. 
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Jun 15, 2012 04:34
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whowhatwhere posted:You mean you want her to be Margaery? Worse, actually. How the gently caress did this thread get to 200 posts since I last went to work? I just had an intense moral discussion with one of my relatives and realized that they are pure Stark. Sorry, Ma, but you guys are screwed.
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Jun 15, 2012 04:54
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Waffle Ho posted:Worse, actually. How the gently caress did this thread get to 200 posts since I last went to work? poo poo posting.
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Jun 15, 2012 04:57
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IRQ posted:poo poo posting.
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Jun 15, 2012 05:02
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Daenal.Waffle Ho posted:Worse, actually. More devious than Margaery?  (in the same way I for Littlefinger and used to for Varys before his insanity was revealed).
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Jun 15, 2012 05:08
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rejutka posted:You didn't post it. Alright, here it is in all it's terrible glory: An awful sex scene posted:That night Daario had her in every way a man can have a woman, and she gave herself to him willingly. The last time, as the sun was coming up, she used her mouth to make him hard again, as Doreah had taught her long ago, then rode him so wildly that his wound began to bleed again, and for one sweet heartbeat she could not tell whether he was inside her, or her inside of him. Does anyone else get the impression she's sucking on poo poo-dick? I mean he "had her in every way a man can have a woman." 
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Jun 15, 2012 05:26
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shady anachronism posted:Alright, here it is in all it's terrible glory: That seemed to be the implication. Although that leaves some things out. I mean, did he penetrate her cervix? Dragon fans need to know.
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Jun 15, 2012 05:55
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What part of "had her in every way a man can have a woman" do you not understand?
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Jun 15, 2012 06:02
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So, in her nose, then?
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Jun 15, 2012 06:03
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Naturally. I can't wait to see Emilia Clarke's impression of season 1 Cersei's perpetually constipated face.
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Jun 15, 2012 06:07
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shady anachronism posted:Alright, here it is in all it's terrible glory: Holy poo poo, that's a lot more awful than I remember it. Maybe it's because I kind of skimmed through that chapter, but GODDAMN! Didn't he write semi-decent sex scenes at one point or am I looking through nostalgia-glasses? This scene doesn't even read like it's something George shat out while masturbating. Contra Calculus fucked around with this message at 06:21 on Jun 15, 2012 |
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Jun 15, 2012 06:18
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The Dany sex acenes in ADwD are profoundly uncomfortable, since they do nothing for the character or plot.
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Jun 15, 2012 06:21
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Contra Calculus posted:Didn't he write semi-decent sex scenes at one point or am I looking through nostalgia-glasses? This scene doesn't even read like it's something George shat out while masturbating. Ambiguatron posted:The Dany sex acenes in ADwD are profoundly uncomfortable, since they do nothing for the character or plot.
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Jun 15, 2012 06:26
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Ambiguatron posted:The Dany sex acenes in ADwD are profoundly uncomfortable, since they do nothing for the character or plot. Apparently you don't appreciate how denigrating something improves it. Somehow.
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Jun 15, 2012 06:29
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Contra Calculus posted:Holy poo poo, that's a lot more awful than I remember it. Maybe it's because I kind of skimmed through that chapter, but GODDAMN! They weren't "decent" as in "erotic", but "decent" as in "revealed character and/or advanced plot without being eye-rollingly bad."
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Jun 15, 2012 06:52
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