More shit that pisses you off: What does that say about the quality of your emails?

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > More shit that pisses you off: What does that say about the quality of your emails?

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SyNack Sassimov: May 4, 2006; Let the robot win.
��--Captain James T. Vader

Agrikk posted:

I say, "that is a really bad idea and not recommended. But if you are going to use VPN links for production traffic, here is our list of hardware that we know runs well, is reliable and scales well."

Customer, "we are going to use what we have existing."

I say, "I guess so, but for the love of god, do not use [device] as your gateway because we have known issued with [device] and it will drop the link at your traffic load."

Question, which you may not be able to answer under NDA grounds, and is really just to satisfy my curiosity. Do you guys use StrongSWAN or a variant thereof as your VPN termination? I ask because we recently switched to that to connect to our VPC instead of a Cisco ASA and the tunnel reliability / dependability has been a lot better, almost as if it's connecting to the same thing on the other side.

# ? May 12, 2015 20:10

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# ? Jun 10, 2024 21:36

Agrikk: Oct 17, 2003; Take care with that! We have not fully ascertained its function, and the ticking is accelerating.

Potato Alley posted:

Question, which you may not be able to answer under NDA grounds, and is really just to satisfy my curiosity. Do you guys use StrongSWAN or a variant thereof as your VPN termination? I ask because we recently switched to that to connect to our VPC instead of a Cisco ASA and the tunnel reliability / dependability has been a lot better, almost as if it's connecting to the same thing on the other side.

We used to run a pretty common VPN endpoint for our traffic, but what I am allowed to say is, like everything else we do, we have grown our own VPN device and use that to terminate customer connections. While it still has some issues connecting to some customer gear, it has proven to scale much better and handle itself at ridiculous loads than other commercial devices. We have written our own switch, router and firewall software that runs on white box hardware that has proven to perform better, so it made sense to grow our own VPN stack as well.

And the Cisco ASA was [device] in my story, so you aren't alone. Don't connect to a VPC using a Cisco ASA folks.

Not even once.

# ? May 12, 2015 20:27

Bob Morales: Aug 18, 2006; ~~Just wear the fucking mask, Bob~~

I don't care how many people I probably infected with COVID-19 while refusing to wear a mask, my comfort is far more important than the health and safety of everyone around me!

gently caress you I won't work on your computer

I'm trying to make my cousin mad

she said hey can you work on my computers I need something moved over and then an external drive blah blah

I said sure $100/hr is my rate

REALLY?

I said yup

Then today she writes me again "What about if I give you a case of beer"

Sorry I'm not 19 I don't do things for a case of beer. I said I charge $100/hr and often times I wish I hadn't because I don't have a lot of time and would rather spend it doing the things I want to do

She said you don't have any kids you should have plenty of time

I said sorry I don't want to help you goodbye

I get home at 5:30

I go to bed at like 10:00

So I have a whole 4.5 hours to make dinner, eat, take a shower, change into non-work clothes, work out, drink a beer, enjoy a book or television show, talk to my friends....not spending 3 hours at someone's house who only calls me when they want their computer fixed goofing around with their crap for $20.

# ? May 12, 2015 20:51

rolleyes: Nov 16, 2006; Sometimes you have to roll the hard... two?

Bob Morales posted:

She said you don't have any kids you should have plenty of time

Oh gently caress that noise, I've had that one pulled on me before too.

Dear Bob's cousin,

It was your choice to have children. You don't get to decide what other people do with their free time because of that choice, nor do you get to penalise them because you resent their lack of children.

Love and hugs,

Rolleyes.

# ? May 12, 2015 21:09

Volmarias: Dec 31, 2002; EMAIL... THE INTERNET... SEARCH ENGINES...

Bob Morales posted:

gently caress you I won't work on your computer

I'm trying to make my cousin mad

she said hey can you work on my computers I need something moved over and then an external drive blah blah

I said sure $100/hr is my rate

REALLY?

I said yup

Then today she writes me again "What about if I give you a case of beer"

Sorry I'm not 19 I don't do things for a case of beer. I said I charge $100/hr and often times I wish I hadn't because I don't have a lot of time and would rather spend it doing the things I want to do

She said you don't have any kids you should have plenty of time

I said sorry I don't want to help you goodbye

I get home at 5:30

I go to bed at like 10:00

So I have a whole 4.5 hours to make dinner, eat, take a shower, change into non-work clothes, work out, drink a beer, enjoy a book or television show, talk to my friends....not spending 3 hours at someone's house who only calls me when they want their computer fixed goofing around with their crap for $20.

To be fair, 4.5 hours of free time is about 5 hours more than most parents get.

# ? May 12, 2015 21:11

GentlemansSleepover: Apr 26, 2010

Agrikk posted:

Jobchat:

When people ask me what I do, especially if in a bar, airplane or random social setting, I sometimes make up what I do. I've been a race car driver, an open heart surgeon, a rocket scientist, a mountaineering tour guide and a "comedian on call". The ensuing conversation is way more interesting for both parties than telling them "I am an IT infrastructure architect."

Hah, I've done this before. Both times in recent memory it didn't even start with someone asking what I did, but just assuming or mixing me up with someone else. I bullshitted with a guy about golf course maintenance for 20 minutes on the mistaken identity one. Another person assumed I worked construction (apparently big dude + beard = construction worker to her) so we talked about that for a while. My wife thought it was weird that I liked doing this, but I find it pretty fun to flex the fast-talker muscles every now and then.

# ? May 12, 2015 21:11

Erwin: Feb 17, 2006

Volmarias posted:

To be fair, 4.5 hours of free time is about 5 hours more than most parents get.

So what? See the post above yours.

# ? May 12, 2015 21:17

Sickening: Jul 16, 2007; Black summer was the best summer.

Bob Morales posted:

gently caress you I won't work on your computer

I'm trying to make my cousin mad

she said hey can you work on my computers I need something moved over and then an external drive blah blah

I said sure $100/hr is my rate

REALLY?

I said yup

Then today she writes me again "What about if I give you a case of beer"

Sorry I'm not 19 I don't do things for a case of beer. I said I charge $100/hr and often times I wish I hadn't because I don't have a lot of time and would rather spend it doing the things I want to do

She said you don't have any kids you should have plenty of time

I said sorry I don't want to help you goodbye

I get home at 5:30

I go to bed at like 10:00

So I have a whole 4.5 hours to make dinner, eat, take a shower, change into non-work clothes, work out, drink a beer, enjoy a book or television show, talk to my friends....not spending 3 hours at someone's house who only calls me when they want their computer fixed goofing around with their crap for $20.

As much as it sucks to always be asked for mundane things do you always talk to your family that way? I feel like I have been relied on to be a free moving man more times that I would prefer but I also can figure out a way to decline to do a family member a favor besides quoting them a hourly rate. Just seems a little beep bop boop to me ya know?

# ? May 12, 2015 21:17

MC Fruit Stripe: Nov 26, 2002; around and around we go

Our development team be like :hurr:

# ? May 12, 2015 21:38

OAquinas: Jan 27, 2008; Biden has sat immobile on the Iron Throne of America. He is the Master of Malarkey by the will of the gods, and master of a million votes by the might of his inexhaustible calamari.

MC Fruit Stripe posted:

Our development team be like

Go on....

Just had to verify that my coworkers cabled all the dual-connected power supplies in the datacenter to different PDUs, since we had a power outage and one set of generators wasn't working. Then 15 minutes after I finished the offending breaker was located and flipped. :suicide:

# ? May 12, 2015 21:43

MC Fruit Stripe: Nov 26, 2002; around and around we go

OAquinas posted:

Go on....

I never elaborate because I imagine that somewhere, 8 of my coworkers are huddled in secret, reviewing all of my posts. :ninja:

# ? May 12, 2015 21:45

Kazinsal: Dec 13, 2011

MC Fruit Stripe posted:

I never elaborate because I imagine that somewhere, 8 of my coworkers are huddled in secret, reviewing all of my posts.

We're not, I promise.

# ? May 12, 2015 21:49

Siochain: May 24, 2005; "can they get rid of any humans who are fans of shitheads like Kanye West, 50 Cent, or any other piece of crap "artist" who thinks they're all that?

And also get rid of anyone who has posted retarded shit on the internet."

Comcast.
gently caress you Comcast.

# ? May 12, 2015 21:55

the spyder: Feb 18, 2011

Trying to update ~7 year old Dell 6248 switches and I can not for the life of me get TFTP or TFTPserver to work on my 10.10.2 Mac. I have no Windows machines and virtual box won't bridge my thunderbolt adaptor so I could use TFTPD.

# ? May 12, 2015 21:58

OAquinas: Jan 27, 2008; Biden has sat immobile on the Iron Throne of America. He is the Master of Malarkey by the will of the gods, and master of a million votes by the might of his inexhaustible calamari.

Siochain posted:

Comcast.
gently caress you Comcast.

Don't say that! You know how some people go "if I had a nickel every time I heard blah..."? Well, Comcast has actually figured out how to do that. Their entire business model is geared towards maximal numbers of people going "gently caress Comcast." It's the only way it makes sense.

Oh great, now I just gave them a nickel. :argh:

# ? May 12, 2015 21:58

Sheep: Jul 24, 2003

Charter decided that instead of contacting us to see why the bills weren't being paid (they were) they'd just cut our internet connection. Had to fax them copies of the checks to prove that yes we paid them.

AT&T did something similar and decided to just cut our phone service after they decided to stop sending us bills (why would you do this) which then obviously didn't get paid.

# ? May 12, 2015 22:01

Agrikk: Oct 17, 2003; Take care with that! We have not fully ascertained its function, and the ticking is accelerating.

Siochain posted:

Comcast.
gently caress you Comcast.

Say no more, brother.

# ? May 12, 2015 22:02

evol262: Nov 30, 2010; #!/usr/bin/perl

the spyder posted:

Trying to update ~7 year old Dell 6248 switches and I can not for the life of me get TFTP or TFTPserver to work on my 10.10.2 Mac. I have no Windows machines and virtual box won't bridge my thunderbolt adaptor so I could use TFTPD.

You're starting it with launchctl and not trying to use xinetd, right?

# ? May 12, 2015 22:03

FlapYoJacks: Feb 12, 2009

Siochain posted:

Comcast.
gently caress you Comcast.

I am glad you know their marketing logo!

# ? May 13, 2015 00:39

Garrand: Dec 28, 2012; Rhino, you did this to me!

Siochain posted:

Comcast.
gently caress you Comcast.

Regardless of the specific instance this may be in reference to, as a customer and former employee I agree with this sentiment 200%.

# ? May 13, 2015 01:00

the spyder: Feb 18, 2011

Yes, but I ended up giving up and borrowing my coworkers laptop. Something is very broken and it's due for a reinstall at this point.

More poo poo pissing me off: The new firmware corrupted the flash and I ended up having to repair the flash, xmodem the firmware back on, and rebuild the boot code. This has taken half my drat day. I can't wait to get a sys/network admin in here soon.

# ? May 13, 2015 01:32

Proteus Jones: Feb 28, 2013

Agrikk posted:

poo poo pissing me off:

We have literally millions of customers. When we say that it is not a best practice to do X and to not do X, we have a massive data set to support this.

Customer says, "we want to connect our VPC in [region] to our home data center."

I say, "If there is production traffic over this link, you need two direct connect links for stability and redundancy."

Customer says, "that's too expensive."

I say, "okay but then at least do one direct connect and one VPN link for backup."

Customer says, " we are going to use two VPN links."

I say, "that is a really bad idea and not recommended. But if you are going to use VPN links for production traffic, here is our list of hardware that we know runs well, is reliable and scales well."

Customer, "we are going to use what we have existing."

I say, "I guess so, but for the love of god, do not use [device] as your gateway because we have known issued with [device] and it will drop the link at your traffic load."

Customer, "we use [device] and we are going to use the pair we have for our two VPN links."

Okay, you have ignored our recommendations three different ways, four if you count our initial recommendation to not split data centers for prod traffic, and now you are complaining that your production site is unstable?

This is where "I have this collection of archived email conversations I'd like you look at" comes in handy.

# ? May 13, 2015 03:46

CitizenKain: May 27, 2001; That was Gary Cooper, asshole.; Nap Ghost

My boss is out all this week, and I'm out all next week, giving me a blessed 2 weeks away from him. But part of me wishes I would get sick with something that would take me out for another 2 weeks. I just can't deal with his bullshit anymore, and other internal positions haven't been showing up fast enough.

# ? May 13, 2015 04:43

Fellatio del Toro: Mar 21, 2009

MC Fruit Stripe posted:

I never elaborate because I imagine that somewhere, 8 of my coworkers are huddled in secret, reviewing all of my posts.

I do spend half my time reading these threads trying to figure out if people here are my coworkers.

# ? May 13, 2015 04:57

Super-NintendoUser: Jan 16, 2004; COWABUNGERDER COMPADRES; Soiled Meat

Fellatio del Toro posted:

I do spend half my time reading these threads trying to figure out if people here are my coworkers.

I set up a content filter at my last job. I had it set up to not block anything but just log the sites visited. SAF was by far the top one. The company had maybe 30/people in the office. I'm pretty sure it was just me refreshing every two seconds.

# ? May 13, 2015 05:05

Super-NintendoUser: Jan 16, 2004; COWABUNGERDER COMPADRES; Soiled Meat

Sheep posted:

Charter decided that instead of contacting us to see why the bills weren't being paid (they were) they'd just cut our internet connection. Had to fax them copies of the checks to prove that yes we paid them.

AT&T did something similar and decided to just cut our phone service after they decided to stop sending us bills (why would you do this) which then obviously didn't get paid.

We had a couple clients in the same building. One ordered a new PRI. Verizon owned the building copper so they came out to do the riser and drop off the line at the dmarc on the customers floor. During g their work the other client had a PRI go dead. I figure Verizon is messing with the risers so I find and grab the tech doing the work. All the riser runs to the floor they needed were full so they decided to cut a riser going higher up and reuse it for that floor. They figured they'd just put in a repair order and fix the other later. Somehow they didn't realize it was used. The guy pretty much said "lol whoops" They didn't fix it for weeks and weeks.

Such is the life of one that works with telcos. In my new job I dont know what I'm happier to not work with, Windows desktops or Telcos. Both are side by side at the podium of things that make me want to shoot myself.

# ? May 13, 2015 05:11

less than three: Aug 9, 2007; Fallen Rib

SIR FAT JONY IVES posted:

Such is the life of one that works with telcos. In my new job I dont know what I'm happier to not work with, Windows desktops or Telcos. Both are side by side at the podium of things that make me want to shoot myself.

We have an MSP between us and the telcos. Like we have to call them and open a ticket, where they go and open a ticket with the Telco. It's always a colossal game of telephone and works as well as you'd imagine.

# ? May 13, 2015 05:45

Crowley: Mar 13, 2003

Not pissing me off:

After a month of warning the "superusers" and posting on the intranet we've gone ahead and disabled almost 1000 computer accounts we couldn't verify was still active. Feels good, man.

# ? May 13, 2015 09:00

Sheep: Jul 24, 2003

SIR FAT JONY IVES posted:

Such is the life of one that works with telcos. In my new job I dont know what I'm happier to not work with, Windows desktops or Telcos. Both are side by side at the podium of things that make me want to shoot myself.

I once had a Bell subsidiary tech and a TWC tech get into a yelling match in front of me because the Bell tech started ripping equipment servicing TWC's fiber loop for the area off the wall without checking asset tags first. Both companies are dumb for just assuming they could leave their equipment running in our office with us paying the electricity bill in perpetuity for them though.

Sheep fucked around with this message at 11:50 on May 13, 2015

# ? May 13, 2015 11:47

Dudley: Feb 24, 2003; Tasty

Agrikk posted:

Okay, you have ignored our recommendations three different ways, four if you count our initial recommendation to not split data centers for prod traffic, and now you are complaining that your production site is unstable?

Yep, we make a reporting based software package and unsurprisingly, when running gigantic reports across complex data it needs some RAM. We call 2gb an absolute minimum on desktop and 4gb + 2 per user a minimum on a server.

The number of people who ignore this, in billion pound businesses and try to cram 16 users onto a 16gb server and are surprised when things run slowly is immeasurable.

# ? May 13, 2015 12:22

keseph: Oct 21, 2010; beep bawk boop bawk

Dudley posted:

Yep, we make a reporting based software package and unsurprisingly, when running gigantic reports across complex data it needs some RAM. We call 2gb an absolute minimum on desktop and 4gb + 2 per user a minimum on a server.

The number of people who ignore this, in billion pound businesses and try to cram 16 users onto a 16gb server and are surprised when things run slowly is immeasurable.

It can be measured, it'll just spill to disk doing so.

# ? May 13, 2015 14:06

Ynglaur: Oct 9, 2013; The Malta Conference, anyone?

Dudley posted:

Yep, we make a reporting based software package and unsurprisingly, when running gigantic reports across complex data it needs some RAM. We call 2gb an absolute minimum on desktop and 4gb + 2 per user a minimum on a server.

The number of people who ignore this, in billion pound businesses and try to cram 16 users onto a 16gb server and are surprised when things run slowly is immeasurable.

In TYOOL you can rent a server with 96GB of RAM from Azure for less than $2000 USD / month. People scrooging over 16GB of RAM pisses me off. RAM and disk are cheap. People time is expensive.

# ? May 13, 2015 14:15

Super-NintendoUser: Jan 16, 2004; COWABUNGERDER COMPADRES; Soiled Meat

Sheep posted:

I once had a Bell subsidiary tech and a TWC tech get into a yelling match in front of me because the Bell tech started ripping equipment servicing TWC's fiber loop for the area off the wall without checking asset tags first. Both companies are dumb for just assuming they could leave their equipment running in our office with us paying the electricity bill in perpetuity for them though.

Ha. This isn't a telco tech story, but it's good anyways.

Once my client in the same building as my office called me on their cellphone to tell me everything was down. Now, usually when a user says "everything is down" it's because Google doesn't load quick enough, so I sort of blow it off, but this guy was serious. "No, get the @)(#*$)@#(*$ up here, EVERYTHING IS DOWN".

So I get in the elevator and rush upstairs. I get on to the trading floor and everyone's PCs are just full of errors and red flashing market feeds. They just look at me. I run to the server closet, and look, and all the T1 smart jacks are dark, not red, or in alert, but off. I just stand in the closet, I have absolutely no idea what to do. The only internet line that is working is a cable internet line that is a 4th backup. They have about four PRIs, maybe 15 or 20 P2P T1's for trading data, and a bunch of fiber handoffs. All dead.

I'm stupefied. I really have no idea what is going on. The other guy I work with shows up, and he's like "holy poo poo. I'm going downstairs to check the building telco room." We gets there, and finds a building maintenance guy standing knee deep in water, with a portable band saw staring at the cut off end of the building main water pipe that is spraying like a firehose all over the building telco rack. The guy doesn't speak any english, but he's just look at it, then at us, and then at the pipe.

The building also had a cell antenna on the roof, so fortunately, Verizon and Sprint detected the problem and quickly arrived and replaced everything with in a day or two.

A couple weeks later the guy did it again, but this time he wrapped the telco rack with plastic first, so spraying on it wouldn't kill it. The problem was that the bottom was open so if filled up with water from the bottom and died again.

# ? May 13, 2015 14:30

MrMoo: Sep 14, 2000

Ynglaur posted:

In TYOOL you can rent a server with 96GB of RAM from Azure for less than $2000 USD / month.

Managed hosting turns that into a dual-core server with 12GB RAM and a single 72GB SAS drive running Windows Server 2008, and a minimum 6 weeks time to purchase. Large company IT staff are superstars.

# ? May 13, 2015 14:35

Jean-Paul Shartre: Jan 16, 2015; this sentence no verb

SIR FAT JONY IVES posted:

We gets there, and finds a building maintenance guy standing knee deep in water, with a portable band saw staring at the cut off end of the building main water pipe that is spraying like a firehose all over the building telco rack. The guy doesn't speak any english, but he's just look at it, then at us, and then at the pipe.

I'm just imagining the look on his face; it was probably worse than that, wasn't it?

# ? May 13, 2015 14:38

Super-NintendoUser: Jan 16, 2004; COWABUNGERDER COMPADRES; Soiled Meat

JohnCompany posted:

I'm just imagining the look on his face; it was probably worse than that, wasn't it?

I wish I had a picture. He was just dumb founded standing there. It was a surreal moment.

# ? May 13, 2015 14:40

icehewk: Jul 7, 2003; Congratulations on not getting fit in 2011!

My coworker. Hot swap without a backup? Don't mind if I doooo

# ? May 13, 2015 14:44

OAquinas: Jan 27, 2008; Biden has sat immobile on the Iron Throne of America. He is the Master of Malarkey by the will of the gods, and master of a million votes by the might of his inexhaustible calamari.

icehewk posted:

My coworker. Hot swap without a backup? Don't mind if I doooo

Everything's hot swappable if you're fast enough :slick:

# ? May 13, 2015 15:03

Mogomra: Nov 5, 2005; simply having a wonderful time

SIR FAT JONY IVES posted:

A couple weeks later the guy did it again, but this time he wrapped the telco rack with plastic first, so spraying on it wouldn't kill it. The problem was that the bottom was open so if filled up with water from the bottom and died again.

This is crazy. This is the craziest thing I've ever heard. Did they move the telecommunications room after this, or is the whole building going down every time there's a plumbing issue?

# ? May 13, 2015 15:17

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# ? Jun 10, 2024 21:36

ReelBigLizard: Feb 27, 2003; Fallen Rib

SIR FAT JONY IVES posted:

Ha. This isn't a telco tech story, but it's good anyways.

Once my client in the same building as my office called me on their cellphone to tell me everything was down. Now, usually when a user says "everything is down" it's because Google doesn't load quick enough, so I sort of blow it off, but this guy was serious. "No, get the @)(#*$)@#(*$ up here, EVERYTHING IS DOWN".

So I get in the elevator and rush upstairs. I get on to the trading floor and everyone's PCs are just full of errors and red flashing market feeds. They just look at me. I run to the server closet, and look, and all the T1 smart jacks are dark, not red, or in alert, but off. I just stand in the closet, I have absolutely no idea what to do. The only internet line that is working is a cable internet line that is a 4th backup. They have about four PRIs, maybe 15 or 20 P2P T1's for trading data, and a bunch of fiber handoffs. All dead.

I'm stupefied. I really have no idea what is going on. The other guy I work with shows up, and he's like "holy poo poo. I'm going downstairs to check the building telco room." We gets there, and finds a building maintenance guy standing knee deep in water, with a portable band saw staring at the cut off end of the building main water pipe that is spraying like a firehose all over the building telco rack. The guy doesn't speak any english, but he's just look at it, then at us, and then at the pipe.

The building also had a cell antenna on the roof, so fortunately, Verizon and Sprint detected the problem and quickly arrived and replaced everything with in a day or two.

A couple weeks later the guy did it again, but this time he wrapped the telco rack with plastic first, so spraying on it wouldn't kill it. The problem was that the bottom was open so if filled up with water from the bottom and died again.

My friend has a similar story, came into the office to find a dead network cupboard, no fibre connection, no ADSL, nada. Goes downstairs to find out that when the office one floor below moved out they couldn't be bothered to disconnect their patch rack properly, so they just took a huge pair of cable shears and cut the whole thing from the wall in one chop, not realising that the connectivity for every office above them went through the trunking too.

# ? May 13, 2015 15:18

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > More shit that pisses you off: What does that say about the quality of your emails?

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