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Pollyanna posted:I got a question about roommates. Do you typically pool money for groceries and supplies or does everyone buy stuff on their own? I always bought separately, but often shopped together. That was around college age when I had no money and was not willing to splurge on the same high quality items as my roommates were. Sometimes we planned apartment dinners and just split up the items or had everybody toss in $5 and buy the ingredients. Now my roommate is my wife, so we pool our money anyway... for everything.
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Jun 5, 2017 15:25
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It depends on what you and your roommate(s) agree to, it's all over the place. What worked for me was totally separate groceries, and then for stuff like TP and Windex, either alternating or splitting it.
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Jun 5, 2017 15:29
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i like nice words
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I have always pooled and shared with my roommates, but my roommates have always been close friends and we would generally do things like cook house meals and share chores as well, so it was not just a 'you are someone I share this building with thing'. We were generally in the same area of life too, so for example we'd all by brokeass students and no one was interested in paying for the high-end cheese so that sort of thing never arose. You just have to talk to people and think about it and make sure you're all on the same page.
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Jun 5, 2017 15:41
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Makes sense. I'm hoping to move to a place where I can really settle down for a few years, but I also wanna save money, so I was gonna try splitting a 2br with a friend of a friend. Depending on how the vetting goes I might actually reach a 30% rent cost for once in my life  I'm also putting together a list of questions I need to ask to get a good feel for the other person, and I can't really come up with much more than "are you okay with cats", "what's your budget", and "does your lifestyle gel with mine". I have no idea what questions I should ask to uncover red flags, or what to look out for. Any advice for a first-time apartment-splitter? Pollyanna fucked around with this message at 19:23 on Jun 5, 2017 |
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Jun 5, 2017 15:51
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In the past, roommates and I would split house supplies but not groceries. We'd sort all of our trash so that aluminum cans could be taken to a nearby recycling center for ~$50, then head to Costco to buy a year's supply of paper towels and whatnot. A few questions I consider: Are you in a relationship? i.e. Is there going to be an extra person around often? What are your biggest pet peeves? Do you like to cook? i.e. will there be more messes to clean up? Will you be fighting for fridge space? Is there opportunity here to pool resources for better/cheaper meals? Do you smoke weed? i.e. will it smell around the house? Will friends visit to smoke and loudly play xbox all night? Will dealers visit to sell to you, or do you leave to pick up at a dispensary/elsewhere? What streaming services do you pay for? Will these be shared across the household?
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Jun 5, 2017 20:04
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Pollyanna posted:Makes sense. I'm hoping to move to a place where I can really settle down for a few years, but I also wanna save money, so I was gonna try splitting a 2br with a friend of a friend. Depending on how the vetting goes I might actually reach a 30% rent cost for once in my life *Ask about smoking cigarettes, and if they do smoke, how much they smoke. Even if they don't smoke in the apartment, heavy cigarette smokers have clothing and possessions that reek of cigarette smoke, and their sense of smell is somewhere between heavily dulled and nonexistent. Not necessarily a dealbreaker, but good to know going in. *What is their schedule like? Opposite schedules can be amazing (like living by yourself), or dealbreakers, depending on how noisy they are; you should also establish a morning routine if you're going to be sharing a shower or bathroom, and need it at the same time. *Any allergies or strict dietary restrictions (things that would require you to alter your normal behavior; if they're a vegetarian who doesn't give a poo poo about meat in the kitchen or refrigerator, that doesn't really matter, but if they're a strict vegan who can't be in the same house as a glass of milk, then you'll need to know about that)? *In what ways and with what frequency would they expect to use the common areas? *What temperature are they comfortable at, and how much do they generally use heaters/air conditioning? *If you have a yard, who is in charge of doing yardwork/how are you splitting paying someone to do the yardwork? *What cleanliness level do they expect? Are there any cleaning tasks they refuse to do (this is generally less of a problem if you're not sharing a bathroom)? I'm a person who will frequently leave dirty dishes to soak overnight, but I've known people who aren't okay with that at all. Things to discuss once you've decided to move in together: *How is rent going to be handled? Is one of you paying the other, do you both pay the landlord individually, or what? Is one of you getting a larger bedroom/attached bathroom/parking space/pet and paying more than the other? *How are utility bills going to be handled? Does one of you have behavior that incurs more costs (i.e. you want the thermostat set at 80 in the middle of winter, while your roommate would rather just wear a sweater)? *Establish that either party has veto power over substantial changes in the living situation going forward. Personally, my way of handling things is that I pay rent and all utilities, my roommate pays me for all of that. I have the utility bills digitized and available to him from a Google Drive folder, along with a spreadsheet of bills and payments. I've found it to be a really good practice--after having discussed the living conditions & expectations--to write out an email that basically says "okay, we talked about these things, we're handling rent and bills like this, I have agreed to abide to your weird pet peeve X, you have agreed to abide by my weird pet peeve Y, and we agree that any major changes in the housing situation have to be approved by both/all of us." It all sounds kind of impersonal and robotic, but I have seen so many friends get into so many fights with living with each other and having conflicting expectations; the bill thing I started doing because one dude was apparently overcharging his friends for the utilities at their multi-person house (I only heard one side of this story, so I don't know how true it was), and while I would never do that, when it comes to financial poo poo, I strongly believe in being as transparent as possible. And if it sounds like I'm an rear end in a top hat who would go "but when I moved in, we all agreed to exactly X! See, I have it in this email," quite the opposite has happened; after doing that, I've literally never had to refer back to it, because by going through that process, it sets everyone's expectations really well, and prevents the vast majority of good-faith disagreements. None of this excuses a lack of basic, reasonable flexibility on any party's part; you shouldn't be a doormat for terrible behavior, but you also shouldn't be citing contract law for why you can't make yourself scarce because your roommate is bringing home a guy/girl one night (different story if it becomes a regular thing), or if you deep-clean your place because your parents are coming to visit and ask your roommate to keep it that way until they're gone. And of course, none of this will do anything to prevent overtly bad behavior. I had one roommate move his girlfriend in without asking anyone else in the house (it was a four-bedroom), and that sort of poo poo definitely happens, but it's really difficult to predict. The dude was a nice guy, and other than that, not a problem to live with (I'm still friends with him); honestly, I'd have been okay with it (I mean, definitely perturbed, but not "kick him out" perturbed) if the dude sharing a floor with him hadn't said he wasn't okay with it (see aforementioned "all roommates have veto power over significant changes in the living situation," which I feel is the only reasonable way of handling a shared living situation).
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Jun 6, 2017 02:11
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All good advice! I'll definitely bring this up while working with my potential roommate. I'm going over this stuff with them tmrw over dinner, so let's hope it goes well.
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Jun 7, 2017 15:52
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Met the potential other roommate, and they seem pretty cool. The one concern I have is that they're looking to split a 3br, so this would also be contingent on finding another person - which could also take a while to find, cause I'd also prefer they be on the professional side like me. The person I met might also have a bit of a concern with regards to their budget being slightly unrealistic for the area...budget seems like something that's really out of the question for budging on, so I've been hesitant to question them about it. Is it something worth broaching? Our budgets are very different (different jobs, likely different salaries), and I'm wondering how I should approach that sticking point. Pollyanna fucked around with this message at 04:01 on Jun 9, 2017 |
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Jun 9, 2017 00:54
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Ask them how much money they make. If they don't make at least 3x their share of rent before taxes they can't afford it and you will have to cover their share of the rent in the future.
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Jun 9, 2017 16:21
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lampey posted:Ask them how much money they make. If they don't make at least 3x their share of rent before taxes they can't afford it and you will have to cover their share of the rent in the future. This is in Boston, so the rent market is tougher here. Typically it's more like 50% in this area.
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Jun 9, 2017 16:53
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That's kind of an old rule, most young people in cities are paying more than a third imo. It sounds like their budget is lower than yours. If they know the area, they may be able to find places that are lower than you expect (like, brokers claim nothing as cheap as my apartment exists anywhere). The question is just whether you like the cheaper places they find or whether you want to use more of your income on a more expensive place. If you want to find a roommate whose budget is in line with yours, that's fine too.
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Jun 9, 2017 16:55
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lampey posted:Ask them how much money they make. If they don't make at least 3x their share of rent before taxes they can't afford it and you will have to cover their share of the rent in the future.
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Jun 9, 2017 16:56
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Yeah, the heuristic has changed dramatically thanks to capitalism.Anne Whateley posted:It sounds like their budget is lower than yours. If they know the area, they may be able to find places that are lower than you expect (like, brokers claim nothing as cheap as my apartment exists anywhere). The question is just whether you like the cheaper places they find or whether you want to use more of your income on a more expensive place. If you want to find a roommate whose budget is in line with yours, that's fine too. I have a very different budget from theirs, yes. Not large enough to be ridiculously different, but I'm willing to go 25% higher, and that's still not 33% for me. I guess the question I have is, what's the most tactful way to balance the budget/convenience question, given that degree of budget difference? The biggest concern I have is whether said flatmates will be able to pay rent. I don't want to end up in a position where I'm supplementing someone else's rent, gently caress that.
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Jun 9, 2017 17:08
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If you want to live with them, you need to live in a space that fits their budget. There's a little wiggle room, like if you find a place where one bedroom is significantly bigger or has an ensuite bathroom so you pay more, but the bottom line is you need to fit their budget. It can't be a balance or compromise, because that way lies financial struggle and a ton of drama. If you don't like the apartments that are available in their price range, you need to find a different roommate, which is fine.
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Jun 9, 2017 17:12
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That might make things difficult, then.  In my preliminary searches, I'm not finding much stuff that looks good within that budget. It'll depend on what's available in that range I guess...but the likelihood is that I'll have to make some trade-offs no matter what. I'll do some more searching, thanks.Is a mismatching budget/needs that much of a deal breaker, or am overreacting/being difficult? Do people often break off setups if someone's budget and preferences aren't in line with the others'? Basically, am I out of line? The area's also not quite where I want to be...wow, this really is harder than I thought. I should have been more exacting when asking about their needs. Pollyanna fucked around with this message at 17:57 on Jun 9, 2017 |
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Jun 9, 2017 17:46
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Yeah, the entire concept of a roommate is based on wanting to live in the same place, both the neighborhood and the type of place. If you have different goals, it's fine to say "I think I'm looking for something else, good luck!" and throw them back.
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Jun 9, 2017 18:02
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I guess I should have been smarter with the negotiation/interviewing, then...it's already contingent on the 3rd person being decent, the kinda place we have, and how easy it is to get to whatever workplace I end up in soon, so I think I jumped the gun by saying I was in. gently caress. Okay, well, we'll see how this shakes out...
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Jun 9, 2017 18:06
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You didn't sign a blood contract, so stop digging the well. Text them now and say: "hey it was great meeting you and I hope our place works out, but I realized [more expensive area] is closer to [work or whatever] and sounds cool, so I'm gonna look there too. I know nothing is set in stone, just wanted to let you know!" Then go on Craigslist and look for someone in your area and budget.
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Jun 9, 2017 18:51
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If there's no way they'll budge on their budget, then I might have to decline the plan. I also have about a month and a half until my current lease runs out, and my landlord will probably want an answer on if I'm staying pretty soon, and I'm not sure if it would even resolve by that point - so if it takes too long, I'll also have to pass.
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Jun 9, 2017 20:02
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jfc just go on the rooms/shared craigslist section and get yourself into an existing roommate situation. this will require you to convince some people you're not totally clueless but it can't be harder than getting a compatible person and finding empty apartments
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Jun 11, 2017 04:34
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This is one man's opinion but I would rather be the guy holding the lease and declaring the rules and deciding who comes and goes, than be the guy entering a "roommates wanted" situation. $0.02.
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Jun 11, 2017 06:22
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So I just found out I have to get an off-campus apartment by the end of August. Where do I even begin?
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Jun 11, 2017 15:53
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It looks like we're going to be living in my aunt's house for the summer, and I have some questions about security. Things have been stolen from the property (recycling, gas siphoned from her car) and the house has been broken into twice. She started keeping her car and recycling in the garage and got an alarm system for the house and there have been no issues for the last few years, but I've never lived somewhere with theft issues like that. Are there additional, reasonable things I should do for safety?
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Jun 11, 2017 20:52
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Have an insurance that covers. If you have actual valuable items, a proper safe, bolted down. If you have valuable data on computers, make sure it's backed up in a way you could restore it if the hardware is stolen. (Either an online backup service, or to offline media stored safely.)
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Jun 11, 2017 21:07
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Astrofig posted:So I just found out I have to get an off-campus apartment by the end of August. Where do I even begin? Look at a few places (at least 3-5), rent whatever you like and meets your budget. This process takes a week or so, the timeframe between now and August should be plenty of time. RabbitMage posted:It looks like we're going to be living in my aunt's house for the summer, and I have some questions about security.
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Jun 11, 2017 21:32
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photomikey posted:Start with craigslist or any kind of housing listing your university hosts. You are a prime target for a lot of "housing finders" services, you should be seeing advertisements for them everywhere.
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Jun 12, 2017 09:39
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Thanatosian posted:If you live in a college town or someplace people actually want to live (Bay Area, Seattle, Boston, NYC, etc.), this will not apply. This will not even close to apply. Limiting yourself to 3-5 places in a college town in late summer is a great way to end up homeless. I'm not sure if it applies or not. The town I'd be moving to is kind of big for the Midwest but I have no idea whether it's a desirable area or not. How do I go about getting a roommate?
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Jun 12, 2017 14:22
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Thanatosian posted:If you live in a college town or someplace people actually want to live (Bay Area, Seattle, Boston, NYC, etc.), this will not apply. This will not even close to apply. Limiting yourself to 3-5 places in a college town in late summer is a great way to end up homeless. How to get an apartment in Boston for the late summer: - Haha you waited until now? Everyone else rented in March, you are fuuuucked. - Respond to every add on craigslist/padmapper below your budget - 90% of those are bait for scams or realtors who want to rent you a condo for 3x the price you clicked on - Make an appointment to see the other 10% TONIGHT (it will be gone in the morning, don't even think about the weekend) - Go to the apartment; bring a completed application and your checkbook. Is it on fire? Is it filled with feral turkeys? Can you fit a bed in the room? Great! - Confirm that it is not operated by Alpha Management. - Give them your application and a check for the deposit on the spot. Don't go home and think about it or try to hand it in later, it will be gone. - Pray they accept you and not one of the other people who did the above as well - Congratulations, you have a hovel, now plan better for next year
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Jun 12, 2017 14:27
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Astrofig posted:I'm not sure if it applies or not. The town I'd be moving to is kind of big for the Midwest but I have no idea whether it's a desirable area or not. Nope.
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Jun 12, 2017 15:36
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To get a roommate you should respond to ads in the "rooms for rent" section of Craigslist and attempt to screen out murderers, or worse, frat bros.
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Jun 12, 2017 15:44
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I would be prepared to live with a murderer as long as they can keep regular hours and are willing to go 60/40 on rent.
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Jun 12, 2017 15:52
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The best kind of roommate is the one you'd never know if they were a murderer because you never see them and they clean up after themselves
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Jun 12, 2017 15:56
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Ashcans posted:How to get an apartment in Boston for the late summer: This is something that wasn't really done with the 3br attempt up top and it's prolly what I'm gonna cite once I break it off.
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Jun 12, 2017 16:16
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How do you actually find a moving company? I feel weird googling for "moving companies in $LOCATION" but I have absolutely no idea where to start. That or we go back to our original plan of "rent a u-haul" but we're moving on a Monday so we're having trouble finding a friend or family member actually strong enough (or not too crippled) to help me move the big stuff. It'll be a ridiculously short move, the drive will be 15 minutes tops, so I'm hoping it won't be too expensive to make up for the convenience of making someone else do the heavy lifting.
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Jun 12, 2017 16:25
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The last time I moved I rented a uHaul and then hired some random people listed on the uHaul website to come lift everything for me. It ended up being 2 late teens highschool boys working for their family business who just cranked our an entire apartment in 2 hours. I think it might have been the best $250 I ever spent.
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Jun 12, 2017 18:47
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That tends to be how we do it too. I'm slightly terrified of my OLED TV getting smashed when we undergo this process in the next few weeks, though.
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Jun 12, 2017 19:08
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EL BROMANCE posted:That tends to be how we do it too. I'm slightly terrified of my OLED TV getting smashed when we undergo this process in the next few weeks, though. Did you save the original packaging as they always tell you to do? Otherwise try improvising a box with cloth padding.
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Jun 12, 2017 19:43
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Best way to find movers is probably to ask around and see if anyone has a recommendation. Otherwise you're going to kind of gamble, especially if you are trying to thread the needle on cost, too. If you have anything you care about, I would definitely recommend only hiring professional movers with insurance and making sure that you have specific coverage for any key items to cover it if it gets smashed. If you can move that stuff yourself or don't have anything to get mashed up, then some dudes and a rental truck are probably ok.
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Jun 12, 2017 20:10
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I used the same people my sister did, word of mouth is good for movers. Otherwise Yelp should at least make sure you aren't hiring axe murderers.
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Jun 12, 2017 20:14
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nielsm posted:Did you save the original packaging as they always tell you to do? I considered it, but a 65" TV box in a < 1,000 sq ft condo that's full enough already just isn't fun. I'll get moving blankets, bubble wrap, and a four leaf clover from ebay.
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Jun 12, 2017 20:45
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