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syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Solice Kirsk posted:

I still like to believe that hashtag was for us.

lol

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

IRQ
Sep 9, 2001

SUCK A DICK, DUMBSHITS!

SaviourX posted:

Is a video game an anime? This is an important distinction.

It can be.

Phi230
Feb 2, 2016

by Fluffdaddy
The audience is Tyrion in the sky cells and GRRM is Mord

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Phi230 posted:

The audience is Tyrion in the sky cells and GRRM is Mord

The Sky Cells were amazing in the books and the show

Gimmedaroot
Aug 10, 2006

America and Islam are not exclusive and need not be in competition. Instead, they overlap, and share common principles of justice and progress, tolerance and the dignity of all human beings.
-Barack Obama

Phi230 posted:

The audience is Tyrion in the sky cells and GRRM is Mord

Then we all know what we must do...

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Gimmedaroot posted:

Then we all know what we must do...

Promise to give him money?

Damnit Mord if you could up the levels of gruel and red wine around here and put a safety fence I would gladly pay you tomorrow

No? You're good?



*Gorm watches football sweatily*


Huh *spams low kick*

Groovelord Neato
Dec 6, 2014


i just love that my football team is the best ever and it brings grrm profound sadness to see them win even when it seems utterly impossible.

some bust on that guy
Jan 21, 2006

This avatar was paid for by the Silent Majority.
The Songs of the Bad Thread Compilation


- by my cat is norris, with lyrics by Bhaal


- by my cat is norris, with lyrics by kcroy


- by Contra Calculus, with lyrics by Kaishai


- by my cat is norris, with lyrics by IRQ

A GLISTENING HODOR posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q604eed4ad0

For my theme song
My captain hat thing on
My HBO stream on
Watch as I'm getting my scheme on
Enter the kingdom
We're watching Game of Thrones
They say the best ep was one I didn't write: the best part of season five was Hardhome

Middle America packed in, came to see titties and dragons,
Number one question they askin'? Fuckin' when's Dany leave Meeren?
If I don't get turned on by big tits, here come some bad CGI bullshit
Claiming I'm overreacting? Look at Drogon in fighting pit

Fans are in mournin', and I'm zonin'
They say I'm obese, and I'm swollen,
My weight is 300, just my colon,
300 kilos, why you lol'in?
Baby I'm eating and I'm bloated
I've been a fatass for the longest
But I ain't finished, ain't imploded,
And you know it, and you know it

So follow my blog on Wordstar Four Point Oh
I'm writin' 5 chapters a year dontcha know
But there's nowhere to go
And my writing's too slow
If I wrote like I did in the past
I wouldn't have Dany poo poo in grass

Fans are in mournin', and I'm zonin'
They say I'm obese, and I'm swollen,
My weight is 300, just my colon,
300 kilos, why you lol'in?
Baby I'm eating and I'm bloated
I've been a fatass for the longest
But I ain't finished, ain't imploded,
And you know it, and you know it

Stop all that Con poo poo
Monday morning football poo poo
Blogging that Jets poo poo
Won't write no new game of thrones poo poo
I'm aware I've no worth
Writing that Dorne poo poo
I'm aware I'm failing
I'll write some more porn bitch
Crank out some borin' poo poo
Stop all that warrin' poo poo
Nobody ain't doin' poo poo
Nobody ain't doin' poo poo
Come on, GRRMie, what happened?
Your fatass ain't writing you fappin'
You don't need any more distraction
(Any, any distraction)

Fans are in mournin', and I'm zonin'
They say I'm obese, and I'm swollen,
My weight is 300, just my colon,
300 kilos, why you lol'in?
Baby I'm eating and I'm bloated
I've been a fatass for the longest
But I ain't finished, ain't imploded,
And you know it, and you know it

So follow my blog on Wordstar Four Point Oh
I'm writin' 5 chapters a year dontcha know
But there's nowhere to go
And my writing's too slow
If I wrote like I did in the past
I wouldn't have Dany poo poo in grass

GRRM
GRRM
GRRM
GRRM
GRRM
GRRM
GRRM
GRRM
GRRM
GRRM
GRRM

Beef Hardcheese posted:

Welcome to The Bad Thread
We've got lemoncake
We got nips on our breast plate
Dany shits on the ground

We are the people that image spam
Emptyquote for days
If you've got the pizza, honey,
poo poo in dick disease

In The Bad Thread
Welcome to The Bad Thread
Watch it bring you to your
Shananananana knees, knees
I wanna eat some neeps

Welcome to The Bad Thread
We take it post by post
If you want to talk the books
This ain't the thread for you

And he's a very tubby Gurm
That only knows to eat,
You can read the series
But you'd best stop at book three
In The Bad Thread
Welcome to the Bad Thread
Feel Gurm's, Gurm's, Gurm's serpentine
I, I wanna eat some neeps

:guitar solo:

Welcome to The Bad Thread
It gets worse here every page
Ya learn ta post like a true Wild Card
In The Bad Thread where we play
If you got a hunger for some closure
You'd better stop reading now
You can have anything you want
But it better not be Winds of Winter

In The Bad Thread
Welcome to The Bad Thread
Watch it bring you to your
Shanananana knees, knees
I wanna eat some neeps

And when Bran wargs into Hodor
He makes him kill both the Reeds
the Reeds
the Reeds
the Reeds
YEAH!

:guitar solo:

You know where you are?
You're in The Bad Thread baby
YOU GON GET RAPED

In The Bad Thread
Welcome to The Bad Thread
Watch it bring you to your
Shananana knees, knees

In The Bad Thread
Welcome to The Bad Thread
Feel Gurm's, Gurm's, Gurm's, serpentine

Bad Thread
Welcome to The Bad Thread
Watch it bring you to your
Shananana knees, knees

In The Bad Thread
Welcome to The Bad Thread
Watch it bring you to your
It's gonna get you banned
HWUH!

savinhill posted:

BAD THREAD by Inner Circle

Bad Thread
Whatcha want, whatcha want
what ya gonna do
when the Bad Thread comes to spoil you
Report them!
That's what Gowb's gonna do, what Gowb gonna do
yeah, yeah


Bad Thread, Bad Thread
Whatcha gonna do, whatcha you gonna do when they spoiler you
Bad Thread, Bad Thread
whatcha gonna do, what you gonna do when they spoiler you

Gurm's fifty-eight
with pedo traits
gos to schools and starts to drool
soon his tool is caked in bloody stool
if he get's caught
he'll be a dead fool

Bad Thread, Bad Thread
whatcha you gonna do, whatcha gonna do when Gurm comes for you
Bad Thread, Bad Thread
whatcha you gonna do, whatcha you gonna do when Gurm comes for you

Gurm stuck it that one
he stuck it in this one
he stuck it in your mother
and he stuck it in your father
he stuck it in your brother
and he stuck in your sister
he stuck it in that one
and Gurm stuck it in me

Bad Thread, Bad Thread
whatcha you gonna do, whatcha you gonna do when Gurm comes for you
(same line three more times)

Nobody's gonna escape
Gurmmy won't give us a break
His readers keep getting raped
And this thread is overflowing with hate
rot in hell

Bad Thread, Bad Thread
whatcha you gonna do, whatcha you gonna do when they spoiler you
(three more times)

That Absolute Fucker's a rape machine
a fat and disgusting human being
has scorn for his readers and love of pre-teens
conventions come and conventions go
and if there's free food, I know he'll show
Rape, rape, Rape
and if there's fangirls, I know he'll show

Bad Thread, Bad Thread
whatcha you gonna do, whatcha you gonna do when Gurm comes for you
Bad Thread, Bad Thread
whatcha you gonna, whatcha you gonna do when they spoiler you

Gurm's too fat, Gurm's too lewd
Gurm's too fat, Gurm's too rude

Bad Thread, Bad Thread
whatcha you gonna do, what you gonna do when Gurm dumps on you
Bad Thread, Bad Thread
whatcha gonna do, whatcha you gonna do when Gurm comes on you

Gurm spunks on that one
Gurm spunks on this one
Gurm spunks on your mother
and Gurm spunks on your father
Gurm spunks on your brother
and Gurm spunks on your sister
Gurm spunks on that one
and Gurm spunks on me

Bad Thread, Bad Thread

basx posted:

With apologies to Otis Redding

I'm just walkin' cross the muck of the bay,
Watchin' the crows run away.
Dolorous Edd is gay,
Just wastin' time.

Shittin' in the morning sun,
I'll be shittin when this book is done.
I wish Daario was nailin' my slit,
Because my dragons ain't worth a poo poo.

Now we're missin' a couple of Freys.
But I baked a lamprey pie today.
There's a fat man, who types away,
Wastin' your time.

But now he's sittin' there, watchin' the game,
And his publisher got no one to blame.
He's so corpulent he'll soon be lame,
No book next time.

some bust on that guy fucked around with this message at 15:58 on Jul 17, 2017

Woodpile
Mar 30, 2013
Don't Fear the Raper is a hoot. But I always pronounced it GURM as in germ.

Lycus
Aug 5, 2008

Half the posters in this forum have been made up. This website is a goddamn ghost town.

Woodpile posted:

Don't Fear the Raper is a hoot. But I always pronounced it GURM as in germ.

Is this like "gif"? Gotta admit, George is a soft g.

some bust on that guy
Jan 21, 2006

This avatar was paid for by the Silent Majority.

Woodpile posted:

Don't Fear the Raper is a hoot. But I always pronounced it GURM as in germ.

I say GURM. A gurm sounds worse than a germ.

That song predates this 6 year old thread if you want to realize how long gurm has been screwing us.

George RR Martin and his football
Are together for eternity

some bust on that guy
Jan 21, 2006

This avatar was paid for by the Silent Majority.

Aston posted:

Yo, Night's Watch, Let's kick it!

All right stop, collaborate and listen
Snow is back from my Wilding mission
Something grabs a hold of me tightly
Dead men are rising daily and nightly
Will it ever stop? Yo – I don't know
Turn off the lights and blue eyes glow
A thousand dead Wildlings - too much to handle
Get a bonfire burning and light 'em up like a candle.

Ghost, go rush the Walker that staggers
I'm killing your brain like a dragonglass dagger
Deadly, when they're immune to our weaponry
But to break our vows would be a felony
Love it or leave it, I topped the poll
You got a new Lord Commander in charge of the wall
Winter is coming but I'll survive it
Stab my body to death but Melisandre revives it

Snow Snow Baby. Snow Snow Baby.

visceril posted:

Oh. My. God. Cersei, look at her arms. They're so big.
She looks like, one of those nobleman's bodyguard
But, you know, uglier and taller. *scoff*
They only talk to her because she looks like she could tear out their abdomens.
I mean, her arms, are just so big
I can't believe they're so huge and out there
I mean gross. Look, she's just so...strong!

I like Brienne and I cannot lie
You other brothers can't deny...

geeves posted:

When Brienne walks in for a maid of 3 and 10
and Oathkeeper in yo face
You get sprung, wanna pull out your sword
Cause you notice that shield was Dunk's
Deep in the helm she's wearing
I'm bemused and I can't stop staring

geeves posted:

Oh Brienne, I wanna squire for you
And carve your statue
My Kingsguard tried to warn me
But that sword you got makes me so horny
Ooh, sword-o'-larian
You say you wanna get on my horse?
Well, use me, use me
Cause you ain't that average lady
I see you fightin
and also bitin'
She's set, heft
Leavin outlaws all bereft

geeves posted:

I'm tried of ravens' quarks
Saying Knighthoods are the mark
Take the average queen's man and ask him that
She's gotta pack much clash
So, brothas! (Yeah!) brothas! (Yeah!)
Has your girlfriend got the sword? (Hell yeah!)
Tell 'em to parry! (Parry!) Parry! (Parry!)
Parry that Valyrian sword!
Brienne got arms!

p.crestmont posted:

36-24-36?

Haha, only if she's three and ten!

SaviourX
Sep 30, 2003

The only true Catwoman is Julie Newmar, Lee Meriwether, or Eartha Kitt.

Where's the Kendrick Lamarr joint?

Bad thread was Best thread.

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe
[GRRM]
Music, reality, sometimes it's hard to tell the difference
But we as authors have a responsibility to these kids
Sike!

[Eddard]
If I were to die murdered in cold blood tomorrow
Would you feel sorrow or bend knees
Or would it matter
Can never be the clash of kings
Lemons for me to feed off
I'm Lannister battling
But it's hard when my head's on a stake
There's too much on my pate
And I came way too far in this game to turn and walk away
And not say what I got to say
What the gently caress you take me for? a joke? you sucking sourleaf?
Before I do that, I beg Lyanna to take me back
I get up 'for I get down, run myself in the pound, 'for I put some wack poo poo out
I'm trying-a smack this one out the trident, five-thousand league mark
You all steady trying to drown the Stark?
Ain't gonna do nothing but piss me off
Head on the walls of kingsland, just twist me off
See me leap out, pull the spear out, gently caress Jamie I'm just trying to knock his teeth out
gently caress with me now, bitch, let's see you fight now
Talk is cheap, motherfucker if you're really feeling Quentyn, keep out
Yo Edd, you're gonna let him get away with that?
He tried to play you, you can't let him shove yo kid like that
Man I hate this crap, this ain't rap,
This is crazy the way we act
When we confuse honor with real life when the music stops


[L. Finger]
There ain't no getting rid of Tyrion
You're wife already tried
The only way I'm leaving this bitch is suicide
Killed Jon Arryn, arrived back at my enemy's crib with Tears of Lys
Got drunk then I finished he
I'm every Starks favorite arch-enemy.
Physically fitted to be the most dangerous and quick witted
I Stark willingly with Valryians in the dark diligently
I'm not what you think
I appear to be a pimp
Girls endangered
I can't stay away from her rear end willingly
I just want my her to play with it seriously
I wish a had gold cloaks to march on you mysteriously
I murder you
Danger had me turned into a mad man, son of Rickard, bitch, I'm surgical
I'm invincible to dying, you think not? you got honor? We can see how large
When the music stops

[Biggie V]
I was happy having some junk at first
Thought power would make me tell a perst
It only made my taint feel worst,
It hurts when you see your friends turn their tails on you wolf
When you ain't got nothing left but your word and your balls are pyromanced
And you're stressed from the spider webs
Beggin' with they fingers out
Checking for your record when its selling
When it ain't, that's the end, no laughs
No friends no girl
Just the mares milk you drink till you horse spin you then

U slam into the wall and you fall
Out the black, trying to crawl with one golden hand
About to lose it all in a pool of alcohol
If my funeral's tomorrow, wonder if they would even call when the music stops

[J Slynt]
Let's see how many of your men loyal,
When I pull up looking for you,
With a some gold cloaks and a a royal
Bunch of mercs and you daughter's getting shell shocked
With your head getting right off you're hand cuffed tossed in with Biter by Yoran
Braggin about how you did it with honor, cityguard devour you showered you

When The Music Stops

[Snow Dawg]
Arryns, sky cells and cages
Let loose and made Sansa snow castles
You all don't want knives in the dark
In the dark my dogs all bark like woof
Proof Melisandre I'm a wolf, get your whole roof
Caved in like Baratheon's hoofs
Stomped the roof like Bran got loose


(hot mess I know but I just love the "I'm a wolf" line by Proof)

syscall girl fucked around with this message at 08:54 on Jul 1, 2017

Invicta{HOG}, M.D.
Jan 16, 2002
I can't wait to read TWOW!

Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Dec 22, 2005

GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

p.crestmont posted:

36-24-36?

Haha, only if she's three and ten!
lol

some bust on that guy
Jan 21, 2006

This avatar was paid for by the Silent Majority.

SaviourX posted:

Where's the Kendrick Lamarr joint?

Bad thread was Best thread.

You see I searched for this source song. But I could not tolerate listening to it for 10 seconds, so unfortunately I skipped it. Visceril was dedicated for putting himself through that for us.

visceril posted:

Hey guys nobody gives a gently caress about that plains shitter.

Let's hear it for the #1 pipe-swinger in Westeros, my man P-Dot:

Martin had a dream
Martin had a dream
Podrick have a dream

All my life I want dragons and power
Respect my mind or die from axe shower
I pray my dick get big as the Hand’s Tower
So I can gently caress the world for seventy­two hours

drat I feel amazing, drat I’m in B­Bay
My skills will have you on your back and this axe is never on vacation
Launching that liquid fire and boom­boom, you’re flaming
Drinking milk of the poppy and I pray they don’t find her naked
And I pray you highborn is hating, shooters go after Jaime
Seven Hells if I live life on my knees, I won’t end this sanely
Park it in front of Selmy’s, next to that Maegor’s Holdfast
All you pussies is losers, all my squires is winners, screaming

All my life I want dragons and power
Respect my mind or die from axe shower
I pray my dick get big as the Hand’s Tower
So I can gently caress the world for seventy­two hours

Goddamn I got bitches, drat I got bitches
drat I got bitches: Jeyne Poole, Sansa, and Cersei
All my life I want dragons and power
Respect my mind or die from axe shower

I’ve got twenty­five torches feeling pressure, yes sir
Put fire to that rear end, fear the dark like Melisandre
And her body got those arms that a ruler couldn’t measure
And they make me run fast but I never get embarrassed
And I recognize you have what I’ve been wanting since that Wedding
That Robb Stark had, pop it fast to impress her
She rolling, I’m holding my scrotum and posing
This sword here is golden, so gently caress y’all, I goes in and

All my life I want dragons and power
Respect my mind or die from axe shower
I pray my dick get big as the Hand’s Tower
So I can gently caress the world for seventy­two hours

Goddamn I got bitches, drat I got bitches
drat I got bitches: Jeyne Poole, Sansa, and Cersei
All my life I want dragons and power
Respect my mind or Stoneheart it’s go time

I roll in gold with a good grind
and I run at Moore with a baton
That’s a relay race with a broadsword they say “P, you going to squire mines”
BRIENNE, no way, BRIENNE, no way, BRIENNE, no way, BRIENNE, okay
I’m never living life confined, it’s a failure even if I’m blind
I can tell ya who what when where how to pour your wine right on time
BRIENNE, go play, BRIENNE, go play, BRIENNE, go play, BRIENNE, I’m in Like Gregor,
killing everything from pussy to a mothafuckin’ Moon­Boy beat
She pussy popping and I got options like a Braavosi, I be
L­-A­-N­-N­-I­-S­-port, I win then ball at your defeat
L­-A­-N­-N­-I­-S­-port, my city mobbing in the street, yelling

All my life I want dragons and power
Respect my mind or die from axe shower
I pray my dick get big as the Hand’s Tower
So I can gently caress the world for seventy­two hours

Goddamn I got bitches, drat I got bitches
drat I got bitches: Jeyne Poole, Sansa, and Cersei
All my life I want dragons and power
Respect my mind or die from axe shower

Let it run Moon-Boy

Martin had a dream
Martin had a dream
Podrick have a dream

ruddiger
Jun 3, 2004

Where was Ned during the battle of the trident?

An Apple A Gay
Oct 21, 2008

did bran get magic by bumpin his head or was he always abled

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.

Invicta{HOG}, M.D. posted:

I can't wait to read TWOW!

MODS?!

jsoh
Mar 24, 2007

O Muhammad, I seek your intercession with my Lord for the return of my eyesight

ruddiger posted:

Where was Ned during the battle of the trident?

tower of joy

emanresu tnuocca
Sep 2, 2011

by Athanatos
Ned fought at the trident.

quote:

"I looked for you on the Trident," Ned said to them.
"We were not there," Ser Gerold answered.

scary ghost dog
Aug 5, 2007
i hope the next book goes deep into the hightowers.....those guys are suspicious

jsoh
Mar 24, 2007

O Muhammad, I seek your intercession with my Lord for the return of my eyesight
oh im wrong dang

Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Dec 22, 2005

GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

scary ghost dog posted:

i hope the next book goes deep into the hightowers.....those guys are suspicious

Lol it probably will, Sam's in oldtown after all.

TXT BOOTY7 2 47474
Jan 12, 2006

eat your vegetables dot com

some guy on the bus posted:

You see I searched for this source song. But I could not tolerate listening to it for 10 seconds, so unfortunately I skipped it. Visceril was dedicated for putting himself through that for us.

wow imagine having taste this bad

TK-42-1
Oct 30, 2013

looks like we have a bad transmitter



This is a thread about asoiaf. I think it's implied.

scary ghost dog
Aug 5, 2007

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

Lol it probably will, Sam's in oldtown after all.

i cant wait to read the perspectives of a bunch of characters that are secretly running all kinds of world changing scams and shadow plays in both continents and have been mentioned in passing in every book but drawn no attention because their names dont end in lannister or stark

SaviourX
Sep 30, 2003

The only true Catwoman is Julie Newmar, Lee Meriwether, or Eartha Kitt.

TXT BOOTY7 2 47474 posted:

wow imagine having taste this bad

Tbf, the hook really sucks. Most of his do.


But thanks, some guy. Izzle.

IRQ
Sep 9, 2001

SUCK A DICK, DUMBSHITS!

Invicta{HOG}, M.D. posted:

I can't wait to read TWOW!

I'm sure it will be out by the time the season ends!

SaviourX
Sep 30, 2003

The only true Catwoman is Julie Newmar, Lee Meriwether, or Eartha Kitt.

And oh poo poo, since it's about two weeks to everyone's favourite poo poo show, why don't we all bring back some hot, hot fan-fic! Starting with my second lush, diverse, extensive, deep world-building crossover such and such.
A Song Of Pulp And Fiction

*Note: Though dated now, it still is the second creative goon project finished that began with TB Thread. Which, combined with lyrics and macros, makes us much more productive than GURM.

Fog Tripper
Mar 3, 2008

by Smythe
I currently have a tower of joy, in my pants.

Normy
Jul 1, 2004

Do I Krushchev?


Please write A Storm of Sins, TB Thread.

Blade_of_tyshalle
Jul 12, 2009

If you think that, along the way, you're not going to fail... you're blind.

There's no one I've ever met, no matter how successful they are, who hasn't said they had their failures along the way.

Man, we never even finished A Clash of Kinks/A Gash of Quims.

We stared overlong into the abyss :ohdear:

counterfeitsaint
Feb 26, 2010

I'm a girl, and you're
gnomes, and it's like
what? Yikes.

Blade_of_tyshalle posted:

Man, we never even finished A Clash of Kinks/A Gash of Quims.

We stared overlong into the abyss :ohdear:

Maybe at that point the plot got too complex and bloated to finish. Fitting tribute.

SaviourX
Sep 30, 2003

The only true Catwoman is Julie Newmar, Lee Meriwether, or Eartha Kitt.

counterfeitsaint posted:

Maybe at that point the plot got too complex and bloated to finish. Fitting tribute.

*liked and subscribed*

kcroy
May 30, 2002

by Nyc_Tattoo
completely off topic, but I need to apologize to TBT. In the discussions of good sci fi to read, I have often chimed in when people talk about Hyperion. The general consensus is that the first two books are good. Books 3/4 are terrible. Previously, I have defended book 3/4 ( Endymion ) - however I just re-skimmed them, and they are loving horrible. Just had to get that out of my system.

pidan
Nov 6, 2012


Is the book out yet

Sassy Sasquatch
Feb 28, 2013

kcroy posted:

completely off topic, but I need to apologize to TBT. In the discussions of good sci fi to read, I have often chimed in when people talk about Hyperion. The general consensus is that the first two books are good. Books 3/4 are terrible. Previously, I have defended book 3/4 ( Endymion ) - however I just re-skimmed them, and they are loving horrible. Just had to get that out of my system.

4 was just an endless depiction of the protagonists either loving, eating, or a mix of both. It's kinda like asoiaf in that regard.

pidan posted:

Is the book out yet

It is:
https://tinyurl.com/ybo3loue

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

some bust on that guy
Jan 21, 2006

This avatar was paid for by the Silent Majority.
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