[UFOs] big mummy, big mummy, no whammies

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [UFOs] big mummy, big mummy, no whammies

(Thread IKs: sharknado slashfic)

Mecha Gojira: Jun 23, 2006; Jack Nissan

Pooky posted:

Have we talked about the definite realness of MAJIC-12? Because lol, lmao

I wonder why the cigars have become so prevalent when they used to be rare and discs used to be common but don't seem to be seen as much anymore.

MJ12 documents were released by known disinformation agent Richard Doty aka "The Falcon" of the AFOSI, and it took like three or four catfishing attempts before someone took the bait because it looked too much like bullshit even for ufologists in the 80's.

We're talking the people who wrote the first books about the crash at Roswell going, 'Hmm, this smells fishy to me.'

Also, the other intelligence agencies tell the FBI loving nothing, because the FBI actually had to investigate whether or not the MJ12 documents were real or fake, and only had the assurance of the Air Force that they were in fact forgeries.

The NSA, DIA, CIA, and Air Force all giggling in the corner while the FBI releases their findings to congress.

# ? Jun 16, 2021 15:39

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# ? Jun 10, 2024 00:41

Wheeee: Mar 11, 2001; When a tree grows, it is soft and pliable. But when it's dry and hard, it dies.

Hardness and strength are death's companions. Flexibility and softness are the embodiment of life.

That which has become hard shall not triumph.

https://youtu.be/rH0x-eXxzCA

# ? Jun 16, 2021 16:12

Hooplah: Jul 15, 2006

for about half a second i thought that said glenn greenwald, lol

# ? Jun 16, 2021 16:18

Mecha Gojira: Jun 23, 2006; Jack Nissan

Hooplah posted:

for about half a second i thought that said glenn greenwald, lol

What is Glenn's take on UFO's? Because he's usually right.

# ? Jun 16, 2021 16:23

I AM GRANDO: Aug 20, 2006

Why is science fiction so horny? It's always full of like dominatrix gear and people getting naked, and saucer men always want to gently caress Earth people. Lord of the Rings isn't horny. Westerns weren't horny. I don't get it.

# ? Jun 16, 2021 16:26

blatman: May 10, 2009; 14 inc dont mez

Antifa Turkeesian posted:

Why is science fiction so horny? It's always full of like dominatrix gear and people getting naked, and saucer men always want to gently caress Earth people. Lord of the Rings isn't horny. Westerns weren't horny. I don't get it.

have u ever read a fantasy novel op

there is a lot of overlap between the quirks of sci fi nerds and fantasy nerds and the entire area of that overlap is just a sex pile

edit: sci fi goes "this weird sex poo poo is socially acceptable because it's the future" and fantasy goes "this weird sex poo poo is socially acceptable because elfs"

# ? Jun 16, 2021 16:37

Tekne: Feb 15, 2012; It's-a me, motherfucker

blatman posted:

have u ever read a fantasy novel op

there is a lot of overlap between the quirks of sci fi nerds and fantasy nerds and the entire area of that overlap is just a sex pile

edit: sci fi goes "this weird sex poo poo is socially acceptable because it's the future" and fantasy goes "this weird sex poo poo is socially acceptable because elfs"

this is proof there are no vehicles from elsewhere on earth

if we were truly being visited, some horny nerd would've attempted to have sex with a saucer and proved their existence after his irradiated dick fell off

# ? Jun 16, 2021 16:49

Butternubs: Feb 15, 2012

Antifa Turkeesian posted:

Why is science fiction so horny? It's always full of like dominatrix gear and people getting naked, and saucer men always want to gently caress Earth people. Lord of the Rings isn't horny. Westerns weren't horny. I don't get it.

If you were building a whole new world why wouldn't you make it hornier than the real world?

# ? Jun 16, 2021 16:49

endocriminologist: May 17, 2021; SUFFERINGLOVER:press send + soul + earth lol
inncntsoul:ok

(inncntsoul has left the game)

ARCHON_MASTER:lol
MAMMON69:lol

exactly why and how did you think chernobyl happened

# ? Jun 16, 2021 16:50

mastershakeman: Oct 28, 2008; by vyelkin

Antifa Turkeesian posted:

Why is science fiction so horny? It's always full of like dominatrix gear and people getting naked, and saucer men always want to gently caress Earth people. Lord of the Rings isn't horny. Westerns weren't horny. I don't get it.

lotr is an extreme outlier

# ? Jun 16, 2021 16:51

Mecha Gojira: Jun 23, 2006; Jack Nissan

Tekne posted:

this is proof there are no vehicles from elsewhere on earth

if we were truly being visited, some horny nerd would've attempted to have sex with a saucer and proved their existence after his irradiated dick fell off

Funny you should say that... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ant%C3%B4nio_Villas_Boas

UFO? Check. Radiation Poisoning? Check. Horny? Check.

# ? Jun 16, 2021 16:57

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

Mecha Gojira posted:

Funny you should say that... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ant%C3%B4nio_Villas_Boas

UFO? Check. Radiation Poisoning? Check. Horny? Check.

i like my women to GROWL

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:09

Tekne: Feb 15, 2012; It's-a me, motherfucker

drat, the ufos intelligence gathering is spot on if they grabbed that guy for their breeding program

the fact that he had 4 kids afterward demonstrates mankind's destructive virility

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:09

Marzzle: Dec 1, 2004; Bursting with flavor

munce posted:

A good discussion of triangles.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YhSLMzX3Mnw

didn't they start making triangle shaped stealth planes way back in the 70s?

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:09

Wheeee: Mar 11, 2001; When a tree grows, it is soft and pliable. But when it's dry and hard, it dies.

Hardness and strength are death's companions. Flexibility and softness are the embodiment of life.

That which has become hard shall not triumph.

lol megyn kelly is actually a great interviewer

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:13

WEH: Feb 22, 2009

The capitalization in this one is kinda hosed up because it was originally all caps

quote:

Occurred:2/1/1954 02:00 (Entered as : feb 1954 02:00)
Reported: 12/6/2008 6:31:27 PM 18:31
Radar intercept of ufo by usaf pilot in alaska 1954.

I was a pilot attached to the 449th fighter interceptor squadron all weather at ladd air force base outside of fairbanks alaska in february 1954. we were flying f-94a's and f94b's. our ground radar control station was code named crane control.

I had been scrambled off about two am with my backseat radar orserver. we had made our intercept and were released by crane control. as was the custom, we were flying about burning up fuel as it was unwise to land with much fuel left in the wing tip tanks. we were about 50 miles northwest of ladd when we were recontacted by crane control.

They said that the anchorage radar control station, whose name i have forgotten, had contacted them and that there was an object flying north at about 1100 to 1200 knots per hour. they handed off the contact to crane control. note, this was 1954. nothing flew that fast in 1954. by chance we were in the flight path of the object. this was february and at that latitude it was bitter cold and very black.

Crane control gave me a vector for an intercept. my radar operator soon picked up the object and we had a headon intercept or very close. not the best situation, but i plowed right ahead and kept the bogey dead center. it took only about 30 seconds for the intercept such as it was. i was sure i was dead. nothing happened. no visual, no turbulence, no static or any thing. i did about a three g 180 and my radar observer picked it up again and then it was gone.

Anchorage is about 250 nautical miles south of fairbanks. we were about 50 miles north so the entire event may have taken about 20 to 30 minutes.

This is no great story but i am 80 years old and don't want it to die with me. the important point is that the object was picked up by three different radars. it had mass and size enough to return a pretty good radar return.

I hope ths adds something to your files.

Anyway I'm digging into "unknown" shapes on NUFORC today and a lot of the earlier entries are like "welp I'm old and/or dying but this poo poo happened and I want someone to know" :smith:

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:14

Tekne: Feb 15, 2012; It's-a me, motherfucker

WEH posted:

The capitalization in this one is kinda hosed up because it was originally all caps

Anyway I'm digging into "unknown" shapes on NUFORC today and a lot of the earlier entries are like "welp I'm old and/or dying but this poo poo happened and I want someone to know"

I hope there's some real meat to the report so people who've seen things or had longer encounters can get some closure even if it's the tiniest bit.

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:18

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

ive asked anyone ive ever gotten to know a little bit and as a guess id say around half have a paranormal event story. even found a few old timers who had sightings followed by missing time style events.

if /anything/ i hope people are more willing to bullshit about that stuff in the future

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:21

WEH: Feb 22, 2009

Then there's this guy who's dad found what he thought was flexible metal scattered in his field in the 1940s and just chucked it into a ravine

Tekne posted:

I hope there's some real meat to the report so people who've seen things or had longer encounters can get some closure even if it's the tiniest bit.

Absolutely

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:24

skewetoo: Mar 30, 2003

Strong Simpsons angel mall promotion energy itt

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:25

WEH: Feb 22, 2009

What do we get instead of a new mall?

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:28

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

wow quote is not post in 2021 have an image

The Saucer Hovers has issued a correction as of 17:32 on Jun 16, 2021

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:29

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

skewetoo posted:

Strong Simpsons angel mall promotion energy itt

just let the sheeple chew their cud and attend your duties as lord ownzone

WEH posted:

What do we get instead of a new mall?

the old mall

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:30

skewetoo: Mar 30, 2003

The new mall reopened. Safely. (It isn't safe)

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:32

Azathoth: Apr 3, 2001

WEH posted:

What do we get instead of a new mall?

F-35 II

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:39

skewetoo: Mar 30, 2003

I want to believe.

I really do!

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:42

WEH: Feb 22, 2009

Azathoth posted:

F-35 II

I didn't like the first one :mad:

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:44

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

skewetoo posted:

I want to believe.

I really do!

by all means please do, dont wait for the gubbymint to say its okay

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:47

Tekne: Feb 15, 2012; It's-a me, motherfucker

WEH posted:

What do we get instead of a new mall?

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:48

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

as long as its not ikaruga future...white constantly shooting black

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:51

Mecha Gojira: Jun 23, 2006; Jack Nissan

Azathoth posted:

F-35 II

nah, that dropped two months ago.

https://www.aero-mag.com/secret-new-fighter-jet-16042021/

# ? Jun 16, 2021 17:51

WEH: Feb 22, 2009

drat I guess "shape: unknown" is just where all the abduction reports end up, it's like finding a fresh cache of 70/80s UFO paperbacks

# ? Jun 16, 2021 18:04

Marzzle: Dec 1, 2004; Bursting with flavor

Mecha Gojira posted:

nah, that dropped two months ago.

https://www.aero-mag.com/secret-new-fighter-jet-16042021/

healthcare plz

# ? Jun 16, 2021 18:06

Marzzle: Dec 1, 2004; Bursting with flavor

skewetoo posted:

Strong Simpsons angel mall promotion energy itt

I'd rather get a surprise june 25 xcom 3 disclosure

# ? Jun 16, 2021 18:07

Google Butt: Oct 4, 2005; Xenology is an unnatural mixture of science fiction and formal logic. At its core is a flawed assumption...

that an alien race would be psychologically human.

I'll accept a handshake from an alien in place of healthcare

# ? Jun 16, 2021 18:13

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

# ? Jun 16, 2021 18:16

WEH: Feb 22, 2009

This kills the alien

# ? Jun 16, 2021 18:25

Rah!: Feb 21, 2006

Marzzle posted:

didn't they start making triangle shaped stealth planes way back in the 70s?

yeah

the 1670s

https://twitter.com/Spacecowboy781/status/1403732709323816961
https://twitter.com/Spacecowboy781/status/1403743760501063692
https://twitter.com/Spacecowboy781/status/1401722272193433600

:cthulhu:

# ? Jun 16, 2021 18:28

Rah!: Feb 21, 2006

https://twitter.com/Spacecowboy781/status/1401372623628652545

# ? Jun 16, 2021 18:29

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# ? Jun 10, 2024 00:41

Tekne: Feb 15, 2012; It's-a me, motherfucker

i hope these skyscraper and mountain-sized ufos are only the tip of the iceberg

the great reset should commence with something on this scale entering the solar system
https://youtu.be/HQymFddoo9I

# ? Jun 16, 2021 18:41

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [UFOs] big mummy, big mummy, no whammies

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