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Swaddle is tight, sleepers delight Swaddle is loose, you've woke the goose
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May 3, 2023 19:17
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I always tell people to get a waterproof mattress protector for your bed because chances are either your boobs will leak while you're sleeping or your baby will pee while they're laying on your bed or who knows how many other situations will arise where you want a waterproof mattress protector.
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May 3, 2023 19:41
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Hieronymous Alloy posted:What do y'all wish you had known or thought to do or buy in advance before the first child arrived? Babies make the weirdest loving sounds while asleep, it's totally normal. Mine sounds like a robot dinosaur or a wheezy, cackling wizard at times. On the third day they only want to eat, and might wake up every 20 minutes to do so. It'll pass! In theory, you should put baby down to an empty crib without blanket or anything to sleep. In practice, that's a very different environment from womb and they will have a hard time adjusting to that. They will also wave their arms wildly and wake themselves up by smacking their own face. Learn to swaddle or buy a swaddle with velcro on it - the snug, warm feeling calms them down instantly. Warming up the bed beforehand helps as well.
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May 3, 2023 20:16
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Hieronymous Alloy posted:What do y'all wish you had known or thought to do or buy in advance before the first child arrived? I wish I'd known that babies were aquatic creatures that fed by osmosis (because they are right up until birth) that suddenly have to learn to breathe air and eat food. From that perspective it no longer makes it look like a struggle but instead like they're winning at life and explains why they're so angry all the time I wish I'd known that nobody was exaggerating about how rough the first two weeks are I wish I'd bought a baby feeding/pooping diary in advance. Especially if you're on formula and both partners can feed I wish I'd bought 10 more pacifiers than I did, you will lose them all, and known that newborn is different from 0-3mo size I wish I'd bought 6 dozen pair of socks, you will lose them all I wish I'd asked for more 6-12 mo cute fancy baby clothes, they outgrow newborn clothes within 6 weeks and you hardly leave the house then I wish I'd know how real post partum stuff for the mother is. My wife was only medium crazy for about 2 months after childbirth but apparently it can last more than a year for like, a lot of women and isn't at all uncommon One thing I did know and always pass on is, just rough it the first 6 weeks, they will be hard but things chill way the gently caress out by week 4-5 and by week 6 your life will be somewhat, uh, "normal" whatever that means. Whenever things get tough just think, "alright, just gotta get to six weeks, they said it would improve then" and carry on. Six weeks feels like an entenity on day four or five, having just left the hospital with maybe 6 hours cumulative of sleep Hadlock fucked around with this message at 21:08 on May 3, 2023 |
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May 3, 2023 21:03
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marchantia posted:Hard to answer because at the end of the day little babies don't need that much stuff BUT yes to these in particular Muslin is magic burp cloth material, A+. My buddy lives in Colombia and I still sent him a 20 pack. They ought to make it so you can only call it a burp cloth if it's made from muslin Buy at least two fold up waterproof changing things. We got a kikaroo peanut for the changing table and it's magic We live in earthquake land so it was nice peace of mind having some powdered formula on hand (like a week's worth) just in case the store ran out or some other emergency
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May 3, 2023 21:07
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Oh and buy a gently caress ton of infant tylenol to have that on hand. You probably won't use it right away but you do not want to be out when mom is panicking at 4am and have to run to the store. You can get generic brand on amazon. Also, you can (and should) switch to ibuprofen at 6 months, they only recommend tylenol because something like 0.001% of newborns have a mild reaction to ibuprofen and then parents get used to buying tylenol when ibuprofen generally works better and just keep buying tylenol out of habit (i am not a doctor, this isn't medical advice)
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May 3, 2023 21:13
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Plus then you can double up on ibuprofen/Tylenol when they start teething and in some studies that works better than each combined (I am not a doctor, this is not medical advice etc). I bought a Costco pack of dog pee pads for changing table liners and cut them in half. Lasted for at least a year. We're gearing up for number 2 and I just found out my partner has no memory of the first few months. I remember more, but I wasn't the one with PPD. Oh, and male/non birth partners can get postpartum mental health issues too! I have a male family member who got postpartum psychosis and needed to be hospitalized, and as I mentioned my partner got very depressed. His work at the time was very into toxic masculinity too so he didn't have a supportive environment for it outside of home. Be prepared to get mental health support for all the adults in your home, because if you need it then it's not always easy to make it happen while you're going through it.
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May 4, 2023 04:06
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Hieronymous Alloy posted:What do y'all wish you had known or thought to do or buy in advance before the first child arrived? A motorized swing/glider was a lifesaver when our kid was a baby. It was a guaranteed 20-30 minutes where we could sit and have dinner or whatever and the kid would just be chill. Just try to keep them from falling asleep in there.
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May 4, 2023 13:35
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take me to the beaver posted:Oh, and male/non birth partners can get postpartum mental health issues too! I have a male family member who got postpartum psychosis and Yeah the stress is real It's a huge 180 life change, it's not like a dog or cat where you can just put out some extra food and water and go skiing for a three day weekend and expect everything to be fine, or go on a date and come home late unexpectedly. You need to coordinate that poo poo with someone. You have to There are no exceptions. My wife travels about a week a month, usually last minute and I just have to roll with it When you're suddenly looking for last minute childcare the phrase "it takes a village to raise a child" takes on a whole new meaning The burden of inescapable responsibility is unreal, took me about 4 months to get a grip on that, and I still struggle with the idea that this is going to be my life until they get a driver's licence or start sneaking out of the house
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May 4, 2023 13:52
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For us it was "buy more burp cloths". We had a pack of like 8 or something when our dude finally came back from the hospital, and then we were like "wow that was no where near enough". We never used socks and probably 2/3 the clothes we were gifted, since he was born in a cold month. It was just easier to use the all-in-one long clothes since it was cold. In the NICU they taught us to do a swaddle bath. So basically you get your kid naked and swaddle them up in a flannel swaddle, then put them swaddle and all into the bath. Then you just take one limb out at a time to wash. It reduces crying by a lot, so buy a few flannel hospital-style swaddles so you can do it that way. Seconding the mental health issues, I went through those big time. Like all-day 9/10 anxiety and eventually depression for me. I eventually had to go to a part-day program because it was getting to be too much and I couldn't figure out how to cope. Thankfully I was able to get back on my feet and I'm way better at coping with this now, but it can be real. For most parents it's fine. But still, IMO if you don't have a therapist yet (either of you), it may be a good idea to find one beforehand and work on some basic coping strategies ahead of time.
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May 4, 2023 15:26
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Any recommendations for baby bathtubs? We're at 32 weeks and getting down to the bottom of our "to-buy" lists. The advice in the thread has been super helpful to lurkers like us btw.
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May 4, 2023 17:29
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Oh and if you end up bottle feeding, get a cheap pillow + waterproof pillow liner + cheap pillow case. It'll help you position the baby for feeding. Our NICU did inclined side-lying feeding and it's way easier when you have a pillow. Bonus points for a rocking chair.
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May 4, 2023 17:44
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Any baby bathtub is probably fine. We had one with some hammock thing. The best feature it has was a hangar so you could hang it in a closet You just kind of wipe down the baby the first six weeks, I think we only gave her a regular bath once a week or so, mostly to just wet down her hair to avoid flakey fungus scalp or whatever the curtsey name they give it Babies only need a bath once every 7-14 days up through week 12, they never touch the ground except tummy time which at that age is like, 8-20 seconds per day unless you have an exceptionally early crawler on your hands Hadlock fucked around with this message at 18:21 on May 4, 2023 |
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May 4, 2023 18:19
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Yeah mainly just make sure to get a wet cloth in those neck folds on the reg, milk likes to hide in there
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May 4, 2023 18:27
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We only did a couple baths. We moved pretty quickly to first sitting with and then taking standing showers while holding the baby. Easier to get them clean, they tend to be calmer because you’re skin to skin, and less cleanup. Definitely exercise care though because those little dudes are SLIPPERY!!
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May 4, 2023 18:28
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A friend gifted us a hand-me-down bath and said the hammock insert was the only thing she found to suppress her irrational crippling fear her baby was going to drown. Which I take as an endorsement.
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May 4, 2023 18:33
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I appreciate all the notes about weight percentile. He did end up pooping an enormous amount all at once and he's totally fine regardless (and he's still peeing on the regular). He actually jumped up a few percentile points at his latest weigh-in, so his mom is a lot less stressed about having enough supply and etc (which she's been kinda fixated on). What's the general rule of thumb everyone has followed about when you can start using pacifiers? We haven't used one yet but occasionally I will use my pinky finger as one when he's flipping out and mom is in the shower or bathroom. Also, I'll add yet another voice saying to get a ton of muslin blankets. They're crazy useful as burp cloths / towels / changing table liners / swaddles / etc.
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May 4, 2023 18:43
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We started with a pacifier in the hospital because they gave her one during her hearing test. I don't think it caused any issues, but we did get lucky that she dropped it on her own around... month 8? I think? Before she turned 1.
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May 4, 2023 20:16
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My first never took a pacifier. My second I started at about four weeks once I was confident he was rocking breastfeeding. He stopped by himself around eight months. If you’re not having feeding issues any more it would be fine to start, but just like sleep training, a pacifier is not a requirement!
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May 5, 2023 01:39
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Toddler stopped using a paci a few weeks ago when all of us lost her last one, which was on its last legs anyway. She seemed to handle it pretty well. By the end she wasn't even really using it, she just liked to have it in her crib out of habit.
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May 5, 2023 16:03
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Nipple confusion is (probably) bullshit: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26181720/ Pacifier early/pacifier often (if helpful for your kid). My feeling is this is another breast is best/fed is best thing where the main thing is just getting through those months. You're not gonna gently caress up the kid.
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May 7, 2023 04:14
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I was reading about that too. Last time in the hospital we were told "don't you dare use a pacifier in the first month if you want to breastfeed" as my newborn was going nuts because she wanted to suck but not feed. They told us to stick our fingers in her mouth, like that's really any better. This time we're just bringing some stinkin' pacifiers to the hospital with us.
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May 7, 2023 04:28
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Pacifiers own bones Without one my wife and I probably would have murdered each other before week 6 We were team formula but the kiddo had no trouble figuring out how to drink from the bottle or use the pacifier. Would not surprise me if the term nipple confusion is a fairly recent thing
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May 7, 2023 07:12
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At our NICU they stuck a pacifier in my boy's mouth almost immediately. I accompanied him to the NICU and then went to see my wife in recovery, I think the next time I was up there he had a paci in. The speech therapist we've been working with for his bottle feeding also seemed to think it was nothing to be concerned about, but that may just be a bottle thing idk.
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May 8, 2023 02:21
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Our newborn wont take a binky, and also her latch got worse after 2 months and it turns out she had a tongue tie that we didn’t notice so that can go on the list of suggestions: make a huge list of questions to ask the pediatrician. We kept a running list between visits and went over it on the days before a visit. It’s a pretty lovely feeling to come home from the Peds having forgot something you wanted to bring up
meanolmrcloud fucked around with this message at 05:58 on May 9, 2023 |
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May 9, 2023 05:22
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meanolmrcloud posted:It’s a pretty lovely feeling to come home from the Peds having forgot something you wanted to bring up
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May 9, 2023 06:59
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I’ve been wondering lately, what’s the general consensus these days on locking up things like medicine and alcohol after the toddler phase? When I was a kid I had full access to that stuff, I just had no interest in it. Would my parents be considered negligent nowadays, or is it on a kid-by-kid basis? Edit: Whoops meant to post this in the parenting thread 
Silent Linguist fucked around with this message at 11:45 on May 9, 2023 |
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May 9, 2023 11:35
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Silent Linguist posted:I’ve been wondering lately, what’s the general consensus these days on locking up things like medicine and alcohol after the toddler phase? When I was a kid I had full access to that stuff, I just had no interest in it. Would my parents be considered negligent nowadays, or is it on a kid-by-kid basis? They should be locked up. If your toddler decides to copy you (assuming you take regular meds and vitamins and stuff) and take a bunch of pills, it could be disastrous. Alcohol tastes pretty awful to little ones, but you never know what they're going to do.
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May 9, 2023 23:39
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sharkytm posted:They should be locked up. If your toddler decides to copy you (assuming you take regular meds and vitamins and stuff) and take a bunch of pills, it could be disastrous. Alcohol tastes pretty awful to little ones, but you never know what they're going to do. Sorry I was talking about after toddlerhood—once the kid is old enough to know the rules. Obviously I don’t let my toddler access that stuff. I’ll try to rephrase: my parents demonstrated trust in me by leaving their alcohol accessible (rightly so, I was a goody two-shoes and so were all my friends). Just wondering if this would universally be considered a bad idea nowadays. Silent Linguist fucked around with this message at 03:47 on May 10, 2023 |
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May 10, 2023 03:22
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My brother in law, his kid turned 4 and they just stopped drinking at home. His kid is an absolute hell demon though. Prior to that they were bottle of whiskey (him) and bottle of reisling (her) per week So far my daughter (2.5) shows no interest in alcoholic drinks, she's just milk and water and juice is a special treat at restaurants Very curious to hear what others have done/planning to do
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May 10, 2023 03:55
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Silent Linguist posted:Sorry I was talking about after toddlerhood—once the kid is old enough to know the rules. Obviously I don’t let my toddler access that stuff. Got it. It's an intensely personal decision. My parents left their alcohol unlocked and I never screwed around with it.
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May 10, 2023 13:37
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My dad had beers in the fridge and I never even considered drinking them because I was That Kid Who Didn't Have Alcohol Until They Were 21.
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May 10, 2023 16:19
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When I was a kid locks were just a way to get my attention.
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May 10, 2023 17:06
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My dad let me taste his beer and whiskey when I was like 10 and of course I thought it was nasty so I didn’t drink until I was 25ish. Not the methodology I will use though!
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May 10, 2023 20:06
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To be fair back in the 80s and 90s if your parents were drinking beer it was American piss beer light pilsner that tastes like cleaning fluid. Currently sipping on a blood orange lager thing that looks like orange soda. I don't know what hard lemonade or a white claw would look like to a 5-12 year old But yeah I remember my dad coming home with a 32 oz-ish Foster's at like 10 or 12 and he was highly amused you could buy such a comically large beer can. Keep in mind this was the mid 90s and when Surge came out with their 16oz "tall boy" it was a BIG deal. I never paid it much attention although I do (obviously) recall him being amused by it. He drank a lot of diet Pepsi too and while I'd occasionally drink that, never drank a whole lot of it First alcohol I ended up drinking away from adults was at prom, didn't really get into booze until my early 20s when I could afford things other than food Hadlock fucked around with this message at 03:10 on May 11, 2023 |
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May 11, 2023 03:08
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Second time round and I've just experienced what I think classifies as precipitous labour. My very strong advice to all readers who are considering epidural is don't dawdle on getting hooked up if you know you want one. My first time I missed out because I was 'too far' and lucked out because the OB could do a nerve block at the last minute. This time, despite the rapid pace and the nurses not being sure we'd get it done in time, I insisted repeatedly, and we (barely) made it. But I do not and will never regret that anaesthetists fee.
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May 13, 2023 07:44
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Hieronymous Alloy posted:What do y'all wish you had known or thought to do or buy in advance before the first child arrived? Wish we'd taken better inventory of our actual newborn outfits before we got him home. "Oh he'll be wearing 3mo clothes before you know it, newborn clothes are such a waste" they say... yes sure but it's day 2 home from the hospital and I didn't angle his penis right at the last change, he's soaked his outfit, and a trip to the dresser reveals that actually we only have like 1 more thing that fits him. At least grab a pack or two of the cheap plain white Gerber onesies, and a few of those long-sleeve ones with a zipper. Swaddling is great when you can do it right and the baby cooperates, but for other times, sleep sacks and the velcro swaddles are really drat good. Plus, they're so cuddly when they're in the sleep sack. One thing we didn't expect / know about during delivery: labor shakes. My wife was shaking uncontrollably on and off throughout her labor and for a few hours after delivery. Disconcerting at first, then just annoying for her. A trick we picked up from somewhere that the nurse didn't know: if you put a warm washcloth on the baby's belly, he'll often urinate (if he's ready to otherwise), potentially saving you a face full when you open the diaper. (It's kind of a hassle though so I've been rolling the dice more often lately)
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May 15, 2023 23:00
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For boys they make little hats that go on the tip of their penis (or as I like to call them, "piss hats"). They're called pee pee teepees for some goddamn reason. When my boy was newborn they worked ok, maybe caught half of his pee-during-changes. Now that he's a few months older it's not a big deal, he almost never pees during a diaper change now.
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May 16, 2023 18:00
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My wife is 39 wks and 1day with our second, check up today said she was 1cm and not effaced/no thinning at all. Guess this doesn’t guarantee it won’t happen soon, but she was hoping to go natural early/ on time since a lot of friends and family had pretty easy 2nds. Scheduled induction for next week if nothing happens. With our 1st her water just barely broke and she wasn’t laboring at all so she had to do quick cervidil right into pitocin to make sure the baby was born within 24hrs. Obviously many more painful ways to give birth but it certainly left some memories with her…
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May 17, 2023 00:04
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Everybody is different but I was 1cm at checkup then waters broke spontaneously 2 days later and it was on for young and old. Also as said to me by the midwife during delivery "this is your second, we can go from 1cm and thinned to pushing in 30 seconds."
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May 17, 2023 02:07
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