Presumably a goon made the AP news front page

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Presumably a goon made the AP news front page

Amarcarts: Feb 21, 2007; This looks a lot like suffering.

https://apnews.com/article/indiana-michigan-muncie-grand-haven-d52201655d54b71aa0d544245c1ecc97

quote:

GRAND HAVEN, Mich. (AP) � A judge has ordered a western Michigan couple to pay $30,441 to their son for getting rid of his pornography collection.

U.S. District Judge Paul Maloney�s decision this week came eight months after David Werking, 43, won a lawsuit against his parents.

He said they had no right to throw out his collection of films, magazines and other items. Werking had lived at their Grand Haven home for 10 months after a divorce before moving to Muncie, Indiana.

The judge followed the value set by an expert, MLive.com reported. Werking�s parents also must pay $14,500 to their son�s attorney.

After moving to Indiana, Werking learned that his possessions were missing.

�Frankly, David, I did you a big favor getting rid of all this stuff,� his dad said in an email.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 02:24

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# ? Jun 10, 2024 00:29

haljordan: Oct 22, 2004; the corpse of god is love.

Clearly not a goon, he only lived with his parents for 10 months before moving out

# ? Aug 28, 2021 02:26

RepeatingMeme: Dec 27, 2012; this place is not a place of honor

no highly esteemed deed is commemorated here

nothing valued is here

what is here was dangerous and repulsive to us

this place is best shunned and left uninhabited

This is an outrage wheres the protests happening im buying my tix to michigon now

# ? Aug 28, 2021 02:31

Putty: Mar 21, 2013; HOOKED ON THE BROTHERS

35mm pornno sex penis film reels are pretty expensive man

# ? Aug 28, 2021 02:45

syntaxfunction: Oct 27, 2010

Got a feeling about why he was divorced lmao

# ? Aug 28, 2021 02:48

Lil Swamp Booger Baby: Aug 1, 1981

Putty posted:

35mm pornno sex penis film reels are pretty expensive man

porno sex film

# ? Aug 28, 2021 02:48

Cubone: May 26, 2011; Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.

Amarcarts posted:

Muncie, Indiana

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VQXejpU-Xss&t=6s

# ? Aug 28, 2021 03:11

Rutibex: Sep 9, 2001; by Fluffdaddy

but porn is free? :confused:

# ? Aug 28, 2021 03:20

Zil: Jun 4, 2011; Satanically Summoned Citrus

Rutibex posted:

but porn is free?

This was rare special collectors edition woods porn.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 03:23

Ignatius M. Meen: May 26, 2011; Hello yes I heard there was a lovely trainwreck here and...

please tell me there's nobody in that family whose first name starts with a T

or at least tell me there's a way out of this stupid simulation

# ? Aug 28, 2021 03:23

Lil Swamp Booger Baby: Aug 1, 1981

Rutibex posted:

but porn is free?

I pay $8000 a month

# ? Aug 28, 2021 03:25

runnypoops: Mar 26, 2016; been there. done that. prove yourself to me.

i like tuggin till blood comes out instead of cum. Its how the pros do it!

# ? Aug 28, 2021 03:38

drkhrs2020: Jul 22, 2007

very disappointed this wasn't a "your mom sounds cool OP" post

# ? Aug 28, 2021 03:40

CPL593H: Oct 28, 2009; I know what you did last summer, and frankly I am displeased.

I was expecting a story about some dweeb attacking someone with a flea market katana but this still tracks. How much porn is 30 grand worth of porn, Jesus Christ. To throw that out they would have probably needed to rent a dumpster.

I'm also shocked that no one pointed out that his name is one letter off from being Jerkin.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 03:54

Spinz: Jan 7, 2020; I ordered luscious new gemstones from India and made new earrings for my SA mart thread

Remember my earrings and art are much better than my posting

New stuff starts towards end of page 3 of the thread

Wait a minute

I can SUE MY MOM?@?!

:kingsley:

# ? Aug 28, 2021 04:03

Who What Now: Sep 10, 2006; by Azathoth

Yes, but only for porn-related grievances

# ? Aug 28, 2021 04:05

Colonel Cancer: Sep 26, 2015; Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

Werking hard or hardly werking :wmwink:

# ? Aug 28, 2021 04:25

super sweet best pal: Nov 18, 2009

Jerking with Werking

# ? Aug 28, 2021 04:51

Bad Purchase: Jun 17, 2019

there's a front page?

# ? Aug 28, 2021 05:10

Sunswipe: Feb 5, 2016; by Fluffdaddy

quote:

He said they had no right to throw out his collection of films, magazines and other items.

I both do and don't want to know what the "other items" were.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 05:45

Punkinhead: Apr 2, 2015

The mans right to tug was extremely violated I'm glad he received restitution

# ? Aug 28, 2021 05:50

CPL593H: Oct 28, 2009; I know what you did last summer, and frankly I am displeased.

Imagine having every single person you know or have ever met hear that you used your mom for tens of thousands of dollars because she threw out your porn.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 05:53

Khorne: May 1, 2002

Sunswipe posted:

I both do and don't want to know what the "other items" were.

Sex toys. This is a legitimate case of the parents being real judgmental pricks, snooping, and destroying tens of thousands of dollars worth of property that wasn't just hanging out in the open.

It's a funny title and all, but it's like the mcdonald's hot coffee lawsuit. Pretty legit when you look into it.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 05:53

frogge: Apr 7, 2006

Holy poo poo was he tryin' out the new sex robots? Those are some serious scratch otherwise dude must've had like a few self-storage units full of dvds or something.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 06:00

CPL593H: Oct 28, 2009; I know what you did last summer, and frankly I am displeased.

Sunswipe posted:

I both do and don't want to know what the "other items" were.

Probably a lot of those anime figures and statues with the unrealistically gigantic heaving breasts.

Khorne posted:

Sex toys. This is a legitimate case of the parents being real judgmental pricks, snooping, and destroying tens of thousands of dollars worth of property that wasn't just hanging out in the open.

It's a funny title and all, but it's like the mcdonald's hot coffee lawsuit. Pretty legit when you look into it.

I am David Werking, and I'm here to ask you a question.

Is a man not entitled to a giant heap of porn?
'No!' says my ex-wife 'It's gross and weird.'
'No!' says my dad. 'Now my house reeks like cum.'
'No!' says my mom. 'I can hear your bed creaking when I'm trying to sleep.'

I rejected those answers; instead, I chose something different.
I chose the impossible. I chose... living in my van.
A masturbatorium where the porn collector would not fear his mom.
Where the serial jerker would not be bound by petty morality.
Where the great would not be constrained by the small!

And with the sweat of your brow, a thirty thousand dollar porn collection can become your masturbatorium as well.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 06:02

frogge: Apr 7, 2006

I'm thinking at some point when your porno collection hits a few grand in value you'd probably like set up a dewey decimal system like at a library or something to help organize it. I bet homedog just kept it disordered for full chaos and tuggin' carnage.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 06:06

CPL593H: Oct 28, 2009; I know what you did last summer, and frankly I am displeased.

frogge posted:

I'm thinking at some point when your porno collection hits a few grand in value you'd probably like set up a dewey decimal system like at a library or something to help organize it. I bet homedog just kept it disordered for full chaos and tuggin' carnage.

More like a gooey decimal system.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 06:07

Bad Purchase: Jun 17, 2019

the jurors on the trial had to inspect the entire collection, item by item, to ensure a fair value assessment

# ? Aug 28, 2021 06:13

CPL593H: Oct 28, 2009; I know what you did last summer, and frankly I am displeased.

"Your honor, the jury will need at least another five minutes to deliberate."

# ? Aug 28, 2021 06:15

frogge: Apr 7, 2006

CPL593H posted:

More like a gooey decimal system.

Gross. also right on, :respek:

# ? Aug 28, 2021 06:15

Sophy Wackles: Dec 17, 2000; > access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.

frogge posted:

Holy poo poo was he tryin' out the new sex robots? Those are some serious scratch otherwise dude must've had like a few self-storage units full of dvds or something.

It was rare vintage hentai.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 06:17

GEEKABALL: May 30, 2011; Throw out your hands!!
Stick out your tush!!
Hands on your hips
Give them a push!!; Fun Shoe

Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:

I pay $8000 a month

Funny, I get $8000.00 a month.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 06:22

Meme Poker Party: Sep 1, 2006; by Azathoth

Pawn 17 posted:

It was rare vintage hentai.

It belongs in a museum!

# ? Aug 28, 2021 06:24

Klyith: Aug 3, 2007; GBS Pledge Week

CPL593H posted:

More like a gooey decimal system.

laughed real hard at this

# ? Aug 28, 2021 07:19

Tim Whatley: Mar 28, 2010

Justice wins!!!

# ? Aug 28, 2021 07:32

Chrs: Sep 21, 2015

More like David Wanking lol

# ? Aug 28, 2021 12:49

Big Beef City: Aug 15, 2013

This dude is a big time sex pro and I want to be like him

# ? Aug 28, 2021 12:55

Smugworth: Apr 18, 2003

A proper milking harness can be quite quite expensive, to say nothing of a milking machine. It wouldn't surprise me to find out Mr. Werking was a milking enthusiast. I'm glad he found justice.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 13:12

Zeluth: May 12, 2001; by Fluffdaddy

Underneath my bed porn being taken away and not talked about was weird.

Finding it a year later ... weirder.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 13:16

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# ? Jun 10, 2024 00:29

Decoy Badger: May 16, 2009

They didn't just throw it out, they inspected each one and made a greatest hits collage of the best stuff:

https://www.mlive.com/news/grand-rapids/2019/09/parents-who-were-sued-for-tossing-sons-porn-collection-kept-worst-of-worst-as-evidence-attorney-says.html posted:

OTTAWA COUNTY, MI – A Grand Haven couple being sued by their adult son for disposing of his pornography collection has additional materials that could be illegal, their attorney said.

Beth and Paul Werking recently told their attorney, Anne VanderBroek, that they had kept some materials they considered the “’worst of the worst,’” as evidence of the kind of materials they destroyed, “’just in case,’” the attorney wrote in court documents.

The parents made “cover art” of the discs.

“Further, the material that was kept ‘just in case’ appears to be of dubious nature, causing all parties involved some degree of hesitation,” VanderBroek wrote.

“From first appearance, without actually viewing or reviewing the content of the material, the ‘cover art’ appears to depict highly obscene and likely criminal material, including matters of bestiality and, potentially, child pornography … ,” she wrote.

She said that she and her clients have not looked at the contents of the discs. But the “cover art,” she said, “is beyond shockingly graphic.”

She said that some of the discs appeared to be homemade “with material downloaded from the dark corners of the internet.”

If the discs contain child pornography, her clients would be in a “legal quandary.”

They cannot dispose of the items because of the ongoing legal case but if the materials are child pornography the couple would be at risk of being criminally prosecuted, their attorney said.

They are seeking a court order on how to proceed with the materials, which are in a safety-deposit box. The attorney is holding a flash drive documenting the “cover art.”

Maybe they're just disappointed that he's a brony instead of a good old fashioned furry sparkledog like them.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 13:28

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Presumably a goon made the AP news front page

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