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"A Christmas Prince" is a film that takes place largely around Christmas and partly on New Year's Eve. It contains the following: - a prince - a precocious disabled girl - a woman (she works at a magazine) - a bad prince - a bad woman - a song that sounds like some sort of classic public-domain Christmas tune, but all the words are different for some reason - completely insane ideas about how laws work - a coronation in which the prince says "I do" and the public is invited to speak if they have any objections to the - snow - wolf violence! It was written by a robot, and contains all the elements a film like this should contain. At some point the robot runs out of film to write, but it keeps going anyway. Please enjoy this Christmas treat for the entire family.
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# ? Dec 10, 2017 01:39 |
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# ? May 15, 2024 04:50 |
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Forgot to mention: there are absolutely no minorities, and it's pretty anti-Semitic.
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# ? Dec 10, 2017 04:18 |
I watched this last night with my wife and God drat it's so bad-good. I'm so happy you are also most puzzled by why they did a weird no-rights-needed version of Jingle Bell Rock. It can't be THAT pricey to license.
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# ? Dec 11, 2017 03:15 |
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https://twitter.com/netflix/status/940051734650503168
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# ? Dec 11, 2017 21:07 |
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When I first watched A Christmas Prince I didn't get what made it so terrible as to stand out from all the other movies in the Christmas romance genre. Then I realized that my family's so immersed in godawful Hallmark movies that we're basically innoculated against this stuff. They're all like this, down to the plot structure. It's kind of incredible. FactsAreUseless posted:Forgot to mention: there are absolutely no minorities, and it's pretty anti-Semitic. Umm, excuse me, the lead has a black woman and a gay man as her friends and co-workers that collectively get about maybe three minutes of screentime, this movie is a bastion of progressiveness.
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# ? Dec 11, 2017 22:11 |
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when I saw this pop up in the rec queue or whatever is when I realized Netflix is producing everything but the kitchen sink
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# ? Dec 11, 2017 22:43 |
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Circutron posted:When I first watched A Christmas Prince I didn't get what made it so terrible as to stand out from all the other movies in the Christmas romance genre. Then I realized that my family's so immersed in godawful Hallmark movies that we're basically innoculated against this stuff. This owns.
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# ? Dec 11, 2017 23:59 |
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What makes this movie so badong that I need to watch it
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# ? Dec 12, 2017 00:02 |
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Calaveron posted:What makes this movie so badong that I need to watch it Edit: It's so robotic that, as my girlfriend pointed out, you expect them to just start singing the finger family song.
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# ? Dec 12, 2017 00:04 |
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If you have any interest in bad TV movies whatsoever, The Marriage Chronicles is no longer on Netflix, but has been uploaded to Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SYZKfLqw0Ig&t=1s
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# ? Dec 12, 2017 00:10 |
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Currently watching the very similar "A Christmas Kiss," which makes no sense and has the least charismatic male lead I've ever seen. Edit: nothing that happens in this film is okay
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# ? Dec 12, 2017 00:19 |
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Is the Ron Perlman/Michael Shannon bigfoot furry xmas movie out yet
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# ? Dec 12, 2017 02:34 |
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I believe you can watch it on streaming services.
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# ? Dec 12, 2017 02:54 |
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Everyone, please join me in watching A Christmas Kiss 2.
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# ? Dec 14, 2017 00:07 |
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FactsAreUseless posted:Everyone, please join me in watching A Christmas Kiss 2. What should the Christmas version of Scream Stream be called?
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# ? Dec 14, 2017 01:04 |
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weekly font posted:What should the Christmas version of Scream Stream be called? Red and Green Stream?
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# ? Dec 14, 2017 02:53 |
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12 Streams of Shitmas
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# ? Dec 14, 2017 02:59 |
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Circutron posted:Umm, excuse me, the lead has a black woman and a gay man as her friends and co-workers that collectively get about maybe three minutes of screentime, this movie is a bastion of progressiveness.
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# ? Dec 14, 2017 04:52 |
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The quality jump between A Christmas Kiss and A Christmas Kiss 2 is insane.
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# ? Dec 14, 2017 14:19 |
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The title of this thread is weird since it implies I wouldn't just do that out of my own idiotic volition.
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# ? Dec 14, 2017 15:37 |
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I watched the Christmas Prince and liked when the Christmas Prince became Christmas King and the lady became Christmas Queen and the cripple kid was there
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# ? Dec 14, 2017 21:20 |
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Squallege posted:I watched the Christmas Prince and liked when the Christmas Prince became Christmas King and the lady became Christmas Queen and the cripple kid was there
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# ? Dec 14, 2017 21:42 |
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“Oi loike you Ahmericahn loidy cause you weah chucks in youah gown! Chip chip!” -Christmas Crutchina
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# ? Dec 14, 2017 21:54 |
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every Hallmark style Christmas movie feels subtly antisemitic and all normally, but A Christmas Prince had some fuckin ISSUES to suss out. We gotta talk about that lady.
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# ? Dec 15, 2017 06:05 |
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FactsAreUseless posted:The quality jump between A Christmas Kiss and A Christmas Kiss 2 is insane. Do I have to watch one to fully appreciate the other? My parents discovered that in every single Hallmark romance movie, the kiss happens at 1h58m and then the movie ends immediately. They have apparently watched many.
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# ? Dec 15, 2017 06:32 |
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vaginadeathgrip posted:Do I have to watch one to fully appreciate the other? It's not amazing but it's perfectly watchable. Christmas Kiss is an absolute F, just a completely unpleasant film. Christmas Kiss 2 is a B minus.
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# ? Dec 15, 2017 06:42 |
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sexpig by night posted:every Hallmark style Christmas movie feels subtly antisemitic and all normally, but A Christmas Prince had some fuckin ISSUES to suss out.
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# ? Dec 15, 2017 06:43 |
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FactsAreUseless posted:A Christmas Kiss is a true trainwreck. Not in the fun kind of way. Every character is unpleasant, the male lead is intensely creepy - he seems like he should be the villain in something from the 80s - everyone is zero-dimensional, and the writing is seriously abysmal. Christmas Kiss 2 has better casting, better writing, three-dimensional characters (in a Hallmark movie!), and even subverts romantic comedy expectations. Instead of a sassy black or gay best friend, the lead character has a straight male best friend who is also not a rival love interest. Good thing I really love garbage
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# ? Dec 15, 2017 07:11 |
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Now playing: Merry Kissmas. It doesn't open with Christmas music. It opens with a very 90s vaguely Caribbean (?) (in that Sugar Ray style) and extremely not Christmas song called, I assume from the lyrics, "Christmas Kind of Love."
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# ? Dec 15, 2017 21:32 |
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This takes place in the same world as the Christmas Kiss series - a character works at the same magazine as a previous movie, and they parody the first two movies' elevator kisses with a horny grandma. This movie is not good enough to be self-aware. It's still better than A Christmas Kiss, but once again all the characters are really unpleasant. I'm not one to argue that characters have to be sympathetic in fiction, but I feel like romantic comedy requires it. Another observation: The villain is clearly coded as gay, European, and vaguely non-white. It's super gross.
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# ? Dec 15, 2017 21:46 |
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The same company also did a film called How Sarah Got Her Wings, about a woman who dies with a Pomeranian and they both go to heaven. It's much weirder than you think.
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# ? Dec 15, 2017 23:10 |
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"Holiday in Handcuffs" is the best christmas hallmark movie. It sounds like it'd be porn but it's about a woman abducting a man at gunpoint to prove to her family she has a boyfriend and threatening to murder him if he breaks the lie but then he falls in love with her. "Would-be painter Gertrude 'Trudie' Chandler loses her waitress job and boyfriend Nick on Christmas Eve - her only shot not to feel like her family's black sheep. To replace the ideal son-in-law with even hunkier dream-prince, David Martin, she kidnaps him at gunpoint to attend the family holidays in a secluded luxurious log cabin. Crazy lies prevent David from convincing the Chandler family he's not Nick and from escaping. After finally passing a rescue call to his spoiled fiancée, David decides to play the perfect catch to make her undoing worse. Before the police rescue him, he and the family realize they adore each other, the others all prove imperfect, and David and Trudy reassess their relationship after getting to know each other."
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# ? Dec 15, 2017 23:55 |
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Spoiler: The ending to How Sarah Got Her Wings makes no sense on a lot of levels, and she steals a dog 1. from heaven and 2. from a homeless guy
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# ? Dec 16, 2017 00:27 |
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I adopted my son so he can't be king but don't really I hid a law saying he could be king inside an acorn and wrote a poem about it
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# ? Dec 16, 2017 15:39 |
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FactsAreUseless posted:Spoiler: The ending to How Sarah Got Her Wings makes no sense on a lot of levels, and she steals a dog 1. from heaven and 2. from a homeless guy Is the homeless guy john wick
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# ? Dec 16, 2017 19:42 |
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This movies wastes NO TIME whatsoever on set up! BOOM I'm an unappreciated junior employee that others walk all over BOOM I'm given my very own very important story that could MAKE MY CAREER no I didn't have to ask for it shut up no time BOOM rude meet cute BOOM why yes I'm Miss Takenidentity BOOM girl is sad* BOOM Prince is charmed and charming BOOM "I found out your secret earlier and off screen BOOM LOVE TRIANGLE???? BOOM kiss misunderstanding (even though the Princess totally leaned down it's not his fault!) This is my favorite scene, It's LITERALLY "Uhhh...let's move on to English, because math is hard." "You feel bad about me because of my disease which is uncurable!!" "Nooooo! Nonono noo! HEY: Let's have fun!!" *two scenes later* "I like you because you treat me normal!!" Just BOOM plot point BOOM plot point BOOM plot point. They had a loving schedule and they loving STUCK to it!
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# ? Dec 17, 2017 01:45 |
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The female protagonist is just so confused about numbers!
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# ? Dec 17, 2017 02:36 |
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Owlofcreamcheese posted:I adopted my son so he can't be king but don't really I hid a law saying he could be king inside an acorn and wrote a poem about it I wrote this price of legislature but didn’t do anything with it because I wanted it to be a gift???????
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# ? Dec 17, 2017 04:29 |
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got any sevens posted:Is the homeless guy john wick
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# ? Dec 17, 2017 15:49 |
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# ? May 15, 2024 04:50 |
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Squallege posted:I wrote this price of legislature but didn’t do anything with it because I wanted it to be a gift??????? I'd hide my legislation in an acorn till after I died too if I was clarifying the royal inheritance rule and I had an adopted son and a disabled daughter and I wrote the son in but left out anything about the biological daughter,
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# ? Dec 17, 2017 17:41 |